Want You to Want Me

by Lorelei James

  I knew he wanted to bark at me that I hadn’t learned anything under his tutelage; the first rule of business is to always use someone else’s money to make money. “In the future? I’d absolutely be open to corporate partnerships. But to be blunt, if there’s no chance I’ll lose my inheritance, then how will I ever learn true risk management?”

  Heavy silence stretched between us.

  Then Dad cleared his throat. “I’ve always been proud of you, Nolan. But never prouder than this day, when you’ve shown you’re willing to risk it all not just for yourself, but to right family wrongs we’ve been ignoring for years.” He stood. “Now c’mere and give your old man a hug, and promise me you won’t be too proud to ask me for business advice if you ever need it.”

  “I promise. And I’m not saying I won’t be back at LI someday.” Then I found myself enveloped in a hug from both of my parents. They squeezed me tightly but for the first time today, I felt like I could finally breathe.

  Thirty

  GABI

  I cried myself to sleep. Alone.

  Even witnessing my puffy eyes and face this morning didn’t keep more stupid tears from falling. I didn’t want to leave my apartment, so I paced, and stopped to look out the sliding glass door, ratty Kleenex clutched in my hand, everything in my line of sight a complete blur.

  The knock at my door came too early for it to be Liddy. Or Dallas.

  The look on Nolan’s face after he’d dismissed me yesterday . . . definitely wasn’t him.

  So whoever it was could just go away. I wasn’t in the mood.

  The interloper was persistent.

  “Gabi. Open the damn door.”

  Dani? What was she doing here?

  I unlocked the door and let her in, immediately turning around to try and get myself together.

  “What is going on with you? You don’t answer your phone or texts. And I get here, and you don’t wanna answer the door either? Are you sick or something?”

  “I’m trying to work through some things and didn’t want to be disturbed, okay?”

  “No, it’s not okay.” Grabbing my shoulder, she forced me to face her. “Are you crying?”

  “No. It’s allergies.”

  “Bull. Shit. Why is the tough-as-nails Gabriella Welk bawling her eyes out?”

  “I don’t want to talk about this with you, Dani. Just go.”

  “No, goddammit. You will talk to me. How am I supposed to help you if I don’t know what’s wrong?”

  And I was tired of being a stronghold against the world. The walls cracked, the tough-girl façade came tumbling down and I didn’t even try to stop it. “Everything is wrong. Somehow I managed to fuck up everything in my life all at one time.”

  Rather than a trickle of tears, she got a flood of them.

  But my little sister took it all in stride. She didn’t let go when I clung to her. She didn’t ask questions, she just let me babble.

  And cry.

  When the biggest sobs started to subside, she parked me on my couch with a box of tissues and an admonishment not to move.

  Dani returned with a tray with two steaming cups of tea. She wrapped my hand around one mug and took the second one for herself. “Now. Start from the beginning.”

  I started from the night Tyson dumped me—maybe as a test to see if she’d protest. But she didn’t. How Nolan had hurt my feelings. I’d confronted him, we’d talked and realized that without our mutual preconceived ideas, we liked each other. I broke down again when I talked about Nolan helping me prep for the interview even knowing if I got hired, it’d put his brother in a bind. How much fun we had together. How hot the sex was. How with the perceived nepotism of an LI subsidiary buying Wolf Sports North, I might lose the job I’d fought so hard for. A job that I’d neglected to mention to Nolan would entail me moving. Plus, Jax being pissed at both Nolan and me for keeping him in the dark and messing up his staffing for Lakeside.

  Following the spewing of that word vomit, I literally felt stick to my stomach and ran to the bathroom to vomit for real.

  Afterward, Dani tucked me in bed and then she lay down next to me, her body curled around mine like I used to do for her when she was upset.

  That made me cry harder.

  She didn’t go Pollyanna on me and offer chipper advice that it’d all work out—just another sign that Dani had grown up.

  “Thank you,” I managed without crying.

  “Anytime.”

  “You don’t have to stay.”

  “Sucks for you then, because I am staying.”

  I didn’t want to sleep, since it was still . . . oh, morning . . . but I dozed off anyway.

  When I awoke, Dani remained right beside me.

  I struggled to get up, crafting some crack about being a lazy crybaby, but she kept me in place with a simple, “Don’t.”

  Okay.

  “Now I have a few things to say.”

  That rarely boded well.

  “You’ve been my role model my entire life. I could’ve gotten annoyed hearing, ‘Wow. You’re Gabi Welk’s sister?’ from every coach and every female hockey player I ever met. But not me. It’s been the greatest thing being your sister and your protégée. I know you could’ve made big money privately coaching another player and she’d be the one with the Olympic gold medal instead of me. Or you could’ve tried out for the national team and you’d have that medal for yourself.” She paused. “I know you sacrificed your dream of gold for me, no matter how you deny it by claiming you were ‘too old’ to train that hard.”

  Busted.

  “I’ve never taken you for granted. Never expected you to do half the things you’ve done for me, yet you do them. You are this bright shining beacon, sis, and I’m humbled that I’ve gotten to stand in your light. Because you always made sure that’s what it was for me—your light, not your shadow.”

  I was too stunned to speak.

  “I also know that the past year and a half has been difficult for you. I—we—didn’t want to add to that by falling in love. I’m not saying this to justify anything, but the reason you and Tyson didn’t work isn’t because he was supposed to be with me; it’s because you were destined for someone else.”

  Destined. Now she sounded like Dallas.

  “When you were on the ice for the NHL game and got hurt? Nolan lost his shit, Gabi. He bailed out of the VIP box and I knew where he was going: straight to you. I don’t know where you were in your relationship with him at that point, but he sees everything in you that a man who adores you is supposed to see. That’s what I saw in him. He loves you, Gabs. And let me tell you . . . you are a difficult person to love.”

  My entire body stiffened but Dani held tight.

  “That’s not to say you’re unlovable. You love unconditionally, but you put conditions on those of us who love you. What we’re allowed to do for you. What part of you we’re allowed to see. That is some one-sided bullshit right there. No one who loves you is gonna run away in fear if you show them that you need them. I promise.” She squeezed me and whispered, “This is what I’ve wanted, to give back the strength and love that you’ve always given me.”

  I sniffled. “You forgot patience.”

  “Yes! You’ve tried my patience for years, but it’s finally paid off.”

  “I’ve tried your patience?”

  Dani snorted. “Gotcha. Anyway, I’m here—you’re letting me be here for you. This is a big moment in my life.”

  “I’m sorry. I’m so used to being the big—”

  “Spoon?” she supplied. “It’s not so bad being the little spoon sometimes, is it?”

  “No.” I swallowed hard. “So what’s your advice, big spoon?”

  “For you to look at this crisis as if I came to you with this problem. If I’d busted my ass to get the job on my own merit, and some jealous wann
abe made threats of going public with accusations of nepotism after I’d been awarded the position, but before the business side had been made public. Threats that could not only mar my career but cause issues between me, the man I love and his family. What would you tell me to do, sis?”

  I didn’t hesitate for a second before I answered, “To march into that studio tomorrow morning and demand a meeting with the CEO and the president of Programming. I’d point out that not only wasn’t I involved with the acting CEO of Lund Industries at the time of my interview, it’s a moot point since a subsidiary purchased the media group—not Nolan Lund personally.”

  “Good. And?”

  “And I followed the rules they required as far as NDAs—the leak in their department is not my concern. I expect them to keep their word that the job is still mine.”

  Dani laughed. “There you go.”

  I elbowed her. “Brat.”

  “Last thing. Nolan.” She paused. “You love him, right?”

  “Right.”

  “Then, again, I’ll give you the same advice you’d give me. Follow your dream. If it’s the job, then pursue it. If it’s a life with him, then pursue it. If you want both, you’ll have to work twice as hard and make some compromises. You both will. But you can make it happen, sis. I believe that. I believe in you. And if anyone deserves both, it is you.”

  I turned my head and looked at her. “How’d you get so wise?”

  “By watching and listening to you.”

  “I love you, Dani girl.”

  “Love you too, Gabi.” She sat up. “Now get yourself together, woman. We’ve got plans today.”

  “We do?”

  “Yep.” She stood in front of me and grabbed my hands. “None of that mani-pedi-pampering-spa-type crap. No retail therapy. No drunken karaoke. We’re doing what makes you happiest. What makes you whole. What makes you . . . you.”

  More tears shimmered because this sweet, tough girl understood me better than I’d ever imagined. I opened my mouth to ask specifics, but she shushed me.

  “Huh-uh. You gotta trust me.”

  Did I?

  Yes.

  I took her hands and let her pull me to my feet and out the door.

  * * *

  * * *

  Dani took me to TRIA. The fact I’d been there two days in a row—in full hockey gear—didn’t escape anyone’s notice. Least of all Carly’s, the Whitecaps’ head coach. She skated over to me. “You rethinking my offer, Welk?”

  “Maybe. I have something else going on as far as a career track that’s up in the air right now. I’ll tell you my decision just as soon as I can.”

  “Fair enough. But why are you here?”

  “To blow off some steam, get my head straight. This is what does it for me.”

  We exchanged a look. As a fellow hockey player she understood and didn’t prompt me for more.

  “Warm up. Pickup game starts in ten. Oh, and don’t go easy on these girls. They’ve gotta know what they’ll be up against with the other teams in the league.”

  “Got it, Coach.”

  I knew about half the players. Carly placed Dani and me on opposite teams and we grinned at each other in the face-off circle.

  The game was as grueling as any regular hockey game, which boded well for this team. They were fierce competitors, and it was exhilarating to be on the ice with them.

  Since most of these players had already had a full practice session before the game, we cut the periods in half, so we played thirty minutes, but it felt like sixty minutes.

  Must be that pesky age thing nipping at my blades.

  Dani’s team won 3 to 1, but I was proud the lone goal for our team belonged to me.

  Exhausted, but more at peace than I’d been since yesterday, I jumped when someone beat on the glass behind me. I spun around and saw a guy in a ball cap and a bomber jacket.

  My eyes narrowed; he was wearing a Chicago Blackhawks ball cap. In the Wild’s practice facility.

  Only one guy cocky enough to do that.

  Jax gestured to the open section between the seating and the exit, so I skated over there.

  Dani joined me.

  Before I could say a word, Dani half elbowed me out of the way and said, “Glad you made it, Mr. Lund.”

  Mr. Lund?

  “Call me Jax. You ladies looked great. That goalie of yours . . . she’s top-notch.”

  “Right? Glad I’m not playing against her.”

  “So how many are interested in talking to me?”

  Dani said, “I’ve kept it to two.”

  I whipped off my gloves and made the time-out sign. “Someone wanna tell me what’s going on?”

  “After our talk this morning,” Dani started, “I realized I’m the perfect replacement for your position at Lakeside. Well, not your position exactly, as I think Mr.—Jax—has ideas on pursuing club hockey options.”

  He grinned at me. “I’m here recruiting. I’m also here to tell you there are no hard feelings. I always knew you had bigger things awaiting you out there. You leaving Lakeside forces me to get my ass in gear about making changes. Dani texted me earlier and said she’d be happy to fill in for you as long as necessary. So I went one better and hired her.”

  I looked at my sister in shock . . . and awe, to be honest.

  “Yeah, sorry, I lifted his number from your phone. I figured the least I could do was help you clear a couple of hurdles.”

  “Dani.” Then it hit me. “Wait. What’s the other hurdle?”

  A guy in a hoodie and jeans stood up and joined Jax.

  Nolan.

  No wonder I hadn’t recognized him. He didn’t look like my Nolan at all.

  “For the record, I strongly object to being referred to as a hurdle,” Nolan said dryly.

  “For the record, Gabi needs a ride home as I will be in business meetings with Mr.—Jaxson Lund.” Dani gave me a one-armed hug and leaned in to whisper, “Call me later. You got this.”

  Jax gave us the thumbs-up and then took off.

  My eyes met Nolan’s. “How long have you been here?”

  “Since the game started.” He smirked. “Awesome deke, by the way.”

  “Thanks.”

  He leaned closer and tucked a piece of hair behind my ear, letting the backs of his knuckles graze my cheek. “You shine out there. I love watching you play. I hope that no matter what happens, you’ll never stop playing.” He dropped his hand. “So I’m hoping you have time to talk.”

  I snorted. “I have nothing but time, apparently, since my sister overed on my damn job.”

  “It’s a perfect solution. I’m thrilled she’s helping you out for a change.”

  “Me too.”

  “She ah . . . texted me so I knew where you’d be.”

  “The girl’s gone rogue, breaking into my phone.”

  “Are you upset she contacted me?”

  I shook my head.

  “Okay. Good.”

  Why was this so awkward between us?

  “Umm, I’ll get changed and meet you by the locker room entrance in fifteen.” Then I took a chance, giving him a blatant once-over. “But before I go, I have to know . . . did you get assaulted by a bum and he forced you to trade clothes with him?”

  Nolan threw back his head and laughed. Then he grabbed my jersey and leaned over the partition to give me a blistering-hot kiss that nearly melted the ice beneath me.

  After he released me, he said, “Hurry. And, Happy, you know I’d prefer it if you didn’t shower anyway.”

  “Pervert.”

  He gifted me with a smacking kiss on the mouth. “Go.”

  After I stowed my gear, I decided to check my phone and see who else my little sister had contacted on my behalf.

  No one, thankfully. But there was a voice
mail from a Wolf Sports North ID.

  My gut clenched. Better to get it over with. I hit play.

  “Gabi? This is Lance Jacoby, CEO of Wolf Sports North. We spoke yesterday. I’m calling to let you know that we’ve researched the situation and found ourselves in error. It was unnecessary to put your position on hold. As you indicated yesterday, you sailed through the interview process with flying colors on your own merit and qualifications. We regret our hasty response in questioning your personal relationship rather than giving you the professional credit you deserved. So I apologize on behalf of the entire team here if we allowed you to doubt your worth to us. We are very much looking forward to working with you and ask that you call us at your earliest convenience to set up a time to officially sign the contracts so we can publicly announce our coup in signing you to our broadcast family. Thank you for your understanding. Have a wonderful rest of your day.”

  Had to hand it to the man, that was a helluvan apology. I’d wait until after I talked to Nolan to call him back.

  As soon as Nolan saw me exit the locker room, he swooped me up into his arms. “Just let me hold you for a sec.”

  “For as long as you want.”

  After we broke apart, he said, “Where to?”

  “I’ve heard the Stacked Deck Brewery on the first level is great.”

  Nolan studied me.

  “What?”

  “I’m hardly dressed for—”

  “A brewpub?” I poked him in the ribs. “Lighten up, Lund. I doubt the fashion police are around today.”

  “Hilarious.”

  We snagged a table and ordered two glasses of the seasonal ale.

  After a fortifying sip, I said, “I’ll go first. I hated how things played out yesterday. But I am sorry that I didn’t tell you the job requirement was moving to Duluth. I know it hurt you and that wasn’t my intent.”

  “Apology accepted.”

  My eyebrows went up. “That fast?”

  “After I had time to think about it, I do understand why you didn’t tell me. But going forward, I’ll ask you not to keep me in the dark about things that affect both of us, okay?”

  “Okay.” I exhaled. “So along those lines, the CEO of Wolf left a voice mail for me today. I just listened to it.”