by Nella Tyler
“Come here, son,” Dad said as he pulled me into a bear hug. “I’m so proud of you. Braden would have been proud, too.”
“Thanks, Dad,” I said, feeling the weight of this reunion hunker down on me.
“I’m proud of you, too,” Mom interjected. “But I’m glad that you’re home.”
“I know, Mom,” I smiled at her. “I’m glad, too.”
We walked through the airport together in a tight group, wanting to be in each other’s presence almost as though our proximity to one another could bridge the four-year gap that had separated us. Dad and I loaded my bags into the trunk and then I sat upfront with him while Mom took the back seat. Through the whole ride, she kept her hand squarely on my shoulder as though to reassure herself I was really there.
“I’ve made your favorite for lunch,” Mom said the moment we had cleared the airport. “Lamb chops with homemade fries.”
“Man, does that sound good,” I said. “I can’t remember the last time I had lamb chops.”
“Your room is all set up and waiting for you,” Dad added. “We got you a bigger bed in honor of your arrival.”
“You didn’t need to do that,” I protested. “I was happy with my bed.”
“It’s was a single bed that you used as a teenager,” Mom replied. “You’re six foot two and considerably broader than the skinny kid you used to be. That bed wasn’t going to hold you anymore.”
I laughed. “Well, thanks, I’m sure I’ll enjoy the new bed.”
We spent the drive home in constant chatter, which continued right through lunch and well into the evening. But when six o’clock came around, I glanced at my watch.
“Why don’t you shower and sleep early tonight?” Mom suggested as she stroked my hair.
“I slept on the plane, so I’m feeling pretty refreshed,” I replied. “And anyway, I made plans to meet with the old group tonight at Carrington’s.”
“Oh, that sounds nice,” Mom nodded, but I noticed her eyebrows had gone up slightly. She hesitated for just a moment before she asked, “Will Lauren be there?”
After seeing Lauren at her graduation, my parents had lost all contact with her. Mom had tried calling a couple of times, but her calls had never been answered or returned. After that, she stopped trying, and I had let things lie.
“Well, I told Tyler and Daniel to round up the old gang,” I said innocently. “Which includes Lauren, and I know Beth is definitely coming, so I think Lauren might be there.”
“I see,” Mom nodded. “And whose idea was it to meet tonight?”
“Well…it was mine.”
She smiled knowingly. “And this is just a casual meeting to reunite with your friends…as opposed to Lauren?”
I smiled. “Of course I want to see the old gang,” I said. “Doesn’t mean I don’t have an ulterior motive, too.”
She shook her head at me and even though she was smiling, I knew she was a little worried. “Chase…don’t expect too much.”
“Meaning?”
“Four years is a long time, and you didn’t exactly end things on good terms,” Mom reminded me painfully. “There might be a chance that things are not going to go exactly how you’ve imagined in your head.”
I sighed and nodded. “I’ll manage my expectations,” I promised. “Now I have to go get ready. Tyler said he’d pick me up.”
I showered and dressed quickly before I spent the next hour alternating between sitting on my new, queen-size bed staring at the ceiling and pacing the floor of my room, obsessing over seeing Lauren again. Tyler said that he would pick me up at 7:30 so that we could be at Carrington’s by eight, but it was closing upon eight and there was still no sign of him.
“Damn it,” I said as I picked up my phone and hit Tyler’s number.
“Hi, man!” Tyler’s voice was enthusiastic. “How does it feel to be back?”
“Where are you?” I demanded abruptly. “Weren’t you supposed to pick me up tonight?"
“Small change of plans,” he replied. “I got caught up at work, so Daniel’s picking you up.”
I groaned. “Daniel,” I said. “No wonder’s he’s late.”
Tyler laughed. “He should be there soon,” he assured me.
“I could borrow Dad’s car—”
“What’s the rush?” Tyler asked pointedly. “Does it have something to do with seeing a certain someone again?”
“Fuck off, Tyler,” I said just as I heard the sound of a vehicle pull up outside the house. “Ah, okay, Daniel’s here.”
“Great,” he laughed. “I’m just leaving office now; I should be at Carrington’s in fifteen minutes. I’ll see you there, soldier boy.”
“Okay,” I nodded. “Lauren is coming, right?”
“I invited everyone,” Tyler assured me. “No one told me she wasn’t coming, so I assume you’ll see her tonight.”
“Okay,” I nodded, allowing myself to be reassured as I grabbed my coat and headed downstairs.
I swallowed my annoyance with Daniel’s typical lateness and hugged him as he welcomed me back home. Immediately after, we set off for Carrington’s.
“You excited about seeing everyone again?” Daniel asked.
“Of course.”
“Bull,” he laughed. “You only care about seeing one person tonight. Admit it.”
I rolled my eyes. “You and Tyler think you know me so well.”
“In this case, you’re painfully transparent, man,” Daniel laughed. “You should know that everyone’s already at Carrington’s. So we’re going to be the last to arrive.”
“Great,” I said. “Just what I need…a grand entrance.”
“I do hope Lauren shows up, though,” Daniel said almost as an afterthought. “I’d be nice to see her after so long.”
“What do you mean?” I asked. “You haven’t seen her in a while?”
“She’s been pretty MIA lately,” Daniel nodded. “Actually, she’s been MIA since you left.”
I swallowed hard. Twenty minutes later, we pulled into the parking lot and got out of the car. The pub was in full swing and I could tell it was close to being at capacity when we walked inside. I wondered why I hadn’t thought to choose a quieter place. How was I going to be able to get a minute alone with Lauren with all these people around?
We walked inside and immediately there was a din of sound and hoots as the group caught sight of Daniel and me and cheered at my return. I smiled distractedly as I scanned the old crowd for the one person I most wanted to see. I was forced to go through the motions of hugging everyone, answering predictable questions, and smiling hard, all the while trying to figure out where Lauren was.
When it became clear that she wasn’t there, I moved straight towards Beth, who was nestled at the back of the group with her phone in hand. “Hi, Beth,” I said noticing that she hadn’t come up to welcome me with the rest.
“Chase,” she said giving me a short hug and a distant smile. “It’s good to see you again.”
“And you,” I nodded. “So, where’s Lauren?”
Beth lowered her eyes for a moment and when she looked at me again there was sympathy on her face. “I’m sorry, Chase, but I don’t think she’s interested in seeing you.”
“What?”
“Sorry, buddy,” she said with a shrug. “I tried to convince her to come.”
“Well, try harder,” I said forcefully. “Come on, Beth, you’d be doing me a solid here.”
She sighed. “I don’t know that she’ll listen to me, Chase. Sorry.”
I turned around and walked out of Carrington’s with my phone in hand. The moment I was free from the oppressive heat of chatter and sound, I dialed in Lauren’s number. A strange bleating ringtone sounded on the other end.
“Fuck!” I said through gritted teeth. “I’m still blocked. Fuck!”
Chapter Twenty-Three
Lauren
“Here’s here!” Beth’s text was filled with exclamation points.
Despite my curiosi
ty, I didn’t want to let on that I cared about Chase or what he looked like now or what he was wearing or how bright his smile was. I wanted to be aloof and unconcerned; I wanted to show everyone, including myself, that I could maintain a level of detachment.
I was leaning against the sink in my sweats and a sports bra while Cole splashed around in the tub playing with the new toy boat Mom had bought him for his fourth birthday. His eyes were a shade lighter than his dark-brown hair, which was long and silky. He had such beautiful hair that I had put off cutting it until Cole had proclaimed that he like his hair long.
“Mama, can we have pancakes for dinner?” Cole asked without taking his eyes off his boat.
“We had pancakes for breakfast,” I reminded him.
“But I like them so much.”
“I know,” I smiled as I sat down beside the tub so that I was at eye level with him. “I do, too. I’ll tell you what? If you eat all your veggies tonight for dinner, then I’ll make you more pancakes tomorrow.”
Cole’s eyes lit up instantly. “Promise?”
“Promise,” I nodded.
“With red-berry jam?”
I smiled. Cole loved strawberries, but he had a hard time pronouncing the word when he was younger so he had settled on red-berry, and that had stuck, as he’d gotten older. Now, Mom and I called them red-berries, too.
“Sure thing,” I nodded agreeably as another message from Beth came in.
“Hello?” Beth wrote. “Are you really not going to ask any questions about Chase?”
“I’m resisting the urge,” I wrote back, hoping she would just tell me.
“Well, I must say, he looks good. He’s buffed up a little, but it suits him. And it’s not like those weight lifters whose muscles make me want to throw up. It’s subtle. He looks more rugged than he used to…more masculine somehow. Or maybe I just think so because of the whole military thing. He’s still got a full head of hair and there’s light stubble on his jaw…I think that’s what’s contributing to this whole alpha-male, masculine vibe he’s got going on.”
“Thanks for the update,” I replied. “Now I’ve got to get Cole fed.”
“Doesn’t he usually have his dinner a little earlier?”
“I was running a little late today, okay?” I said defensively.
“Hey, hey, no judgment. It’s tough being a single mom.”
“I’ve got to go.”
“Okay, I’ll keep you posted.”
I put away my phone and clapped my hands together. “Okay, little monster,” I said. “Time to finish up the bath.”
Cole stood up immediately, and I wrapped a towel around him and pulled him out of the tub as it drained. I wiped him dry and then put on his favorite, blue, cotton pajamas and combed his hair down. He followed me into the kitchen to eat dinner. He was eating his carrots and beans without complaint and I was glancing obsessively at my phone when Mom walked in.
“Grandma!” Cole welcomed as she laid a kiss on his forehead.
“Hello, my little boy,” she cooed in the same tone she used on me when I was Cole’s age. “You smell like oranges.”
“Mama used the orange bath wash today.”
“Hmm, you smell good enough to eat,” she said wiggling her eyebrows at Cole who giggled.
I saw my phone light up and grabbed it immediately. It was Beth again. “He just came up and spoke to me. He wanted to know where you were and why you weren’t here tonight. I told him that you weren’t interested in seeing him and he seemed pretty upset. In fact, he just walked right out of here with his phone in hand. I’m thinking he’s trying to call you at this very moment. Is he still blocked?”
“He is.”
“And that’s not going to change?”
“Nope.”
“Man, you’re cold.”
“I’m being practical.”
“You should come.”
“Are you on crack?”
She replied with an emoji that was laughing hysterically. “Come on, I’m serious. There are tons of people here and everyone really wants to see you. Apparently people like you.”
“And I’d like to see them. I just don’t want to see Chase.”
“So ignore him. At the very least, give him the chance to eat his heart out over losing you. Wear something sexy and get that perfect ass of yours over here.”
“Umm, no thanks.”
“You need to get out more.”
“I have a four-year-old and a full time job.”
“You can’t use that excuse every time.”
“Watch me.”
“He looks really good, too.”
“Umm, wrong approach entirely. Now, I’m less likely to come over there.”
“He looks awful. He’s obviously gone to shit after you left him.”
“Nice try. And he left me, remember? Which is why I have no interest in seeing him again. Stop texting me.”
“Please come.”
“Good night.”
I turned off my phone and set it aside. When I looked up again, I noticed that my mother was watching me carefully. “You were typing pretty furiously,” she observed.
“How was work?”
“And now, you’re avoiding my question,” she said.
I sighed and glanced at Cole, who gave me a wide smile. I smiled back at him. “Why don’t you go see what’s on TV.”
“Eat and watch at the same time?” Cole asked.
“Just for tonight,” I said.
He nodded enthusiastically, grabbed his plate, and zoomed off in the direction of the television. “Chase is back,” I told her. “His tour of duty is over, and he’s back home. He’s organized a meeting tonight and everyone is there, including Beth.”
“Why aren’t you over there?” Mom asked.
“Seriously?”
“You don’t have to talk to him.”
“You sound like Beth,” I said. “How can I go there and avoid him the entire night?”
“It can be done,” she replied. “I think you should go.”
“Mom,” I said with annoyance.
“What does Beth say?”
“Hmpf.”
“So, she agrees with me?”
“I’m tired, and I’m not in the mood for a night out.”
“Cole’s going to be asleep soon and I’ll be here with him,” she said. “You should go and have fun. You haven’t seen your friends in forever.”
“I don’t have time for friends.”
“You’re being stubborn.”
“And you’re being annoying,” I snapped. “I’m not going. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go and…change my bed sheets.”
I left Mom in the living room with Cole and went into my bedroom to get a moment alone. The truth was that I desperately wanted to see Chase again. I wanted to speak to him; I wanted to occupy the same space as him. I hated how much I had missed him and how much I wanted to see him again. But my anger was still there. I had resentment, and I had anger, and I had hurt, and none of that was going anywhere. Most importantly, though, I had Cole and I needed to protect him no matter what.
After changing my bed sheets, I put Cole to bed and read him a story from the Winnie the Pooh Collection. His eyes were fluttering shut when I heard a faint knock and the sound of people talking in the living room. I kissed Cole, turned off his night-light, and slipped out of the room.
“Mom?” I called. “Was there someone at the door?”
I turned the corner and found Beth standing in my living room. “Hello, friend,” she said with her blue eyes twinkling. “I’ve come to abduct you for the night.”
“Oh no,” I groaned. “Beth.”
“Sorry, no arguments,” she said. “I’ve heard all your excuses, and I’ve determined that none of them are good enough. You’re coming out tonight and you’re going to have some fun, Chase be damned.”
“Listen to Beth,” Mom nodded.
“This is not a good idea,” I said. “I shouldn’t be seeing Ch
ase. I should be concentrating on…on…Jeremy!”
Mom and Beth exchanged a look.
“What?” I demanded.
“I thought you told him you weren’t interested in dating him?” Mom asked.
“I told him to give me more time,” I clarified.
“Which tells me that you’re not interested in him,” Beth pointed out.
“I am interested in him,” I said defensively. “He’s a great guy.”
“I’m sure he’s great and if you’re that sure about your feelings for him, then you’ll have no problem going out tonight, even if it means seeing Chase,” Beth pointed out shrewdly.
I sighed noisily. “Fine!” I said throwing my hands up in the air.
“Yes!” Beth cheered as she and Mom exchanged a high five. Then she proceeded to follow me into my bedroom. She muscled past me and went straight to my wardrobe. “Okay, the choice is pretty simple. Either the off-the-shoulder, black mini with the nude pumps or the strapless, crimson dress with black heels?”
I sat on my bed and sighed. “I don’t know…the red one.”
“Black it is,” she nodded, disregarding my choice completely.
“Hey!”
“The black mini shows off your legs, it’s form fitting, sexy, and classy all at the same time,” she said decisively. “We want him to eat his heart out, remember?”
“Fine,” I said in defeat as I grabbed the dress and walked into my bathroom to change.
I slipped on the dress and put on some makeup. I decided to opt for a smoky eye with a nude lip. It was understated, but effective, and the moment I let down my hair, the effect was complete. When I walked back out of the bathroom, Beth whistled.
“Damn, girl,” she said. “You look hot.”
“It’s too much,” I said.
“It’s exactly right,” she nodded approvingly. “We are good to go.”
Mom smiled as we passed through the living room. “You look amazing, Lauren,” she said with a self-satisfied grin.
“I’ll be back by eleven,” I said. “Ten-thirty if I can manage it.”
“She’ll be back after twelve,” Beth said, cutting across me. “So don’t wait up. Goodnight!”
