Cover of Darkness

by Kaylea Cross

  “How do you feel?” he asked.

  “Better.”

  His amber gaze ran over her once more. “You look beat. I should let you get some sleep. Need anything before I go?”

  He was leaving? She’d assumed he was going to stay the night with her, even if only for security reasons. Disappointment filled her. Even if he didn’t want to be with her in an intimate way, she would have felt much better with him sleeping beside her. Just so she could feel the warmth of his body and hear his breathing in the night.

  He studied her in concern. “Maybe Ben should stay with you. You’ve been through a lot.”

  “No, that’s okay.” What she meant was, she didn’t want Ben. But for some reason she was too chicken to say it. Something about the way Dec held himself made her sure he would turn her down. She didn’t think she could take that kind of humiliation on top of everything that had happened tonight. Ducking her head, she bit down on her lower lip.

  He sighed and came toward her, opening his arms, and she melted right into them, pressing her face into the hollow of his throat to inhale his scent. A shudder ripped through her. He made a murmur of reassurance, running a hand through her hair. It felt like heaven.

  He kissed the top of her head and tucked her under his stubbled chin, strands of her hair snagging on his whiskers. Sudden tears burned her eyes, and she let out a ragged breath. She could stay like this forever. He made her feel so safe.

  Under the muscles across his chest she could hear his heart beating, a steady, calming throb. He was so strong, so protective of her. She lifted her face. Something in his eyes made her heart stutter. His gaze was impossibly tender.

  “What?” she whispered.

  He shook his head, eyes moving over her face as though he was memorizing every detail.

  “Dec?”

  He relented with a sigh. “I saw a piece of your costume caught in the bathroom window. A blood trail all over the floor and handprints on the windowsill. I didn’t know if you’d been hit.” His arms pulled her in tighter. “I thought he’d taken you again.”

  Her skin went cold. “It was close.” Squeezing her eyes shut, she laid her head on his shoulder and savored the strength surrounding her. “Tehrazzi recognized me the second he appeared in that room.”

  “You sure?”

  “Yes. I think he knew I’d be there, bet he thought he could get me and Masood at the same time. He came out of nowhere with a bodyguard and that gun, and without a word, that guy blew a hole right through Masood’s chest.” And when she’d leapt up with a scream locked in her throat, the bodyguard had lunged at her. “When I saw him coming at me, Ben took him down, then hauled me into the bathroom and shoved me through the window. Luke went after Tehrazzi.”

  How had Tehrazzi known she would be at the club? He couldn’t have, unless someone in the team’s circle had blabbed.

  It pissed her off and scared the hell out of her at the same time. She could have been killed.

  A growl vibrated through Dec’s chest. “We might have a leak somewhere.”

  “Know any good plumbers?”

  “I’m pretty handy at fixing leaks. Luke is, too.” His cheek pressed against hers. “God, I hate that you’re caught up in this.”

  “I volunteered for it.”

  “Don’t remind me. I’m still kicking my own ass for letting you.”

  “Are you kidding? It’s not your fault. Luke had me nailed in so many ways, even without you there. He knew it before he asked me, too, because of my connections with his family and his ties to my father. He only wanted you along because he knew I’d be more comfortable with you on the team.”

  He nuzzled the crown of her head. “You know what your problem is?”

  “I’m too damn stubborn?”

  “That too, but you’re too smart for your own goddamn good.”

  A smile pulled at her lips. “Third in my class at Harvard.”

  “Yeah, I read it in your file.” His hands wandered over her spine, sending licks of heat in their wake. “Speaking of which, there was no reference to you being a belly dancer. Glad I didn’t know that ahead of time, because it would have messed me up. As it is I can’t stop thinking about how you looked out on that dance floor.”

  “You saw me?” She hadn’t realized he’d been in the building with her.

  “Oh, yeah. And now I can’t get the picture of you out of my head.”

  Her breath caught in her throat. She raised her head to look at him. “What did you think?”

  “Please,” he said with a laugh, stroking the side of her face. “Every man in that room was drooling all over themselves.”

  But she didn’t care about any other men. “I want to know what you thought.”

  He met her eyes. “Like you have to ask.”

  She stared back, unwilling to let him squirm out of answering.

  Something flared in his eyes. “You were the sexiest thing I’ve ever seen in my life.”

  Her lips curved. The throb low in her belly began to pulse. “I’m glad. Because I was imagining I was dancing for you.” She swallowed, having made herself completely vulnerable to him.

  His whiskey-colored eyes flared. The stark hunger in the made her breath catch. “God, don’t say things like that to me.”

  “Why not?”

  “Because it makes me want things I can’t have.”

  Why was he so dead set against taking her to bed? It wasn’t like she expected a marriage proposal from him afterward. “Why can’t you have them?”

  His expression became shuttered. “You know why.”

  She’d spooked him. Don’t go, she cried silently. She needed him. Her hands tightened around him in protest, her gaze falling to his lips.

  His gaze dropped to her mouth, too, his hands moving up to sift through her hair, as though he couldn’t help himself. “Ah, hell,” he muttered, and bent to brush his lips over hers.

  Bryn sighed and went up on tiptoe to kiss him back, sliding one palm around his nape and opening her mouth to him. He groaned and pulled her closer, deepening the kiss as the urgency roared through her. Then he slowed and she strained to get closer.

  The stroke of his tongue over hers made the blood pound in her head and between her legs. Her heart seemed to swell in her chest as she reveled in the feel and the taste of him, that leashed hunger and power.

  His hands trailed down to grasp her hips, making them both moan as she rocked into his erection. He slid one hand up to glide against the curve of her breast, fingers caressing through the terrycloth.

  She arched, giving him better access and demanding more. When her head fell back, he followed with his mouth, pressing hot kisses over her jaw to her throat. His tongue swept gently over the tender spot beneath her ear. She gasped. He sucked at her sensitive skin. She grabbed hold of his shoulders, let her hands coast over his muscled chest and hard abs.

  Against her neck, he sucked in a breath, stilling as he waited for her touch.

  More. She needed more. Her palm slid across his waistband, then lower, until she was stroking the length of his erection.

  He pushed his hips against her hand, his lips losing their languorous rhythm against her throat. With a strangled groan, he covered her mouth with his, tongue plunging inside. Bryn urged him on, squeezing his erection in a firm grip. He shuddered.

  More. She didn’t care if they made it to the bed. Standing up right here was good enough.

  Her whole body throbbed with the need for release. One tug, she thought, willing his hand to move to where the robe gaped between her breasts. One tug and she’d be naked, and maybe then he wouldn’t stop.

  Dec suddenly broke the kiss and pulled away.

  Confused, shaken, she reeled back and looked up at him, breath unsteady.

  He was so gorgeous, his eyes all lit up, sexual heat pouring off him. But he backed up a step. “Bryn,” he began, his voice deep and all gravel. “I have to go. Lock the door behind me.”

  “Wha—?”

>   “The door,” he rumbled, heading for it without looking at her. “Make sure you lock it.”

  Rooted to the floor, she stared after him. Her body wept in protest. She couldn’t bring herself to call him back, no matter how much she ached inside. Her pride, though tattered, was all she had left to keep her standing.

  Dec paused at the door, then glanced at her over his shoulder. She saw the need and regret there. “Ben’s next door if you need anything. I’ll see you in the morning.” Then he stepped into the hallway.

  Standing there alone in her robe, suddenly cold without his warmth, Bryn felt like crying.

  “Bryn.” His harsh voice was muffled through the panels. “The door. Lock it, now.”

  She went over and threw the deadbolt, leaned her forehead against it, body and soul crying out for him.

  Then, in a whisper so soft she thought she might have imagined it, he said, “I’m sorry. Sleep tight.”

  Chapter Fourteen

  When his cell phone rang later that night, Ben set the razor down next to the sink and checked the time. 23:20 meant he’d been prettying himself up for a hell of a lot longer than he’d thought. Used to take him ten minutes from start to finish, but since he’d grown the goatee a couple days ago to help disguise his features, it took way longer to shave around it rather than scrape the whole deal off.

  Wiping off the remnants of shaving cream with a towel, he answered. “Yeah.”

  “Hey,” Dec said.

  “Hey.” Why the hell was he calling? He’d expected McCabe to be tangled in the sheets with Bryn by now. That’s why it felt like he had a hot coal buried in his belly. Even the handful of Tums he’d downed hadn’t helped any. “What’s up, my man?”

  “I’m going over some intel with the boss here. Wondered if you could check on Bryn, maybe stay with her. She was pretty spooked.”

  Yeah, well, no shit. She’d had someone’s heart and lungs blown apart all over her.

  “She shouldn’t be alone tonight,” Dec finished.

  Ben’s mouth went dry. Holy shit. They wanted him to stay the night in Bryn’s room. He could just imagine what kind of shape she was in right now, reliving that moment when Masood’s chest had exploded while she’d been in his lap.

  He ran a hand through his damp hair. “Yeah, no problem.”

  “Thanks. I’ll call you if we hear anything.”

  “Sure.” Disconnecting, Ben gazed down at his phone. Why the hell had Irish left her alone if he knew how scared she was? From what Ben had seen, Bryn was more than willing to accept comfort from the SEAL.

  Had he left because he didn’t trust himself? Yeah, Ben could guess how that scenario played out. And yet Dec had walked away, then called him for help. He blew out a breath.

  This was dangerous ground for him. Jesus, he wanted to be the one she needed. Just once, he wanted her to look at him the way she did Irish, to take the solace he wanted to give her. He wanted to open his arms and have her walk into them with something more than friendship, to let him comfort her with his body. God, he would give anything for that chance.

  Inhaling deeply, he picked up the hotel phone and dialed Bryn’s room. She answered, her voice fragile. Something squeezed in his chest as he imagined her wrapped in a robe or blanket, huddled amongst the bedding all alone in the room next door.

  “Hey, it’s me,” he said. “I thought maybe you could use some company.”

  “Oh, I’m…fine.”

  Sure you are, sweet thing. “It’s been a hell of a day, honey. How about I come over for a little while? At least you’ll be able to sleep if you know I’m there.”

  She hesitated, then said, “Okay, if you don’t mind.”

  Mind? Hell no, he didn’t mind. Even if he was the dumbest shit in the universe for setting himself up for this kind of torture. “I’ll be over in a sec.”

  Stuffing some clothes and ammo into a duffel, he slid his cell into his jeans pocket and tucked his Glock into the waistband. Checking the peephole, he went out into the hall, keeping his back to the wall as he hustled to Bryn’s room and knocked. When she opened the door and stepped back to let him in, his lungs constricted.

  Her feet were bare, the tips of her painted pink toenails curling into the carpet as she stood there in the oversized hotel robe. Her dark hair spilled down her back, the ends curling as though she’d let them dry naturally. Without makeup she looked terribly young and vulnerable, her dark eyes wide in her pale face.

  “Hi,” she whispered.

  “Hi.” He shut the door behind him, maintaining his grip on the deadbolt to keep from reaching for her. She looked so sad and lost, it was all he could do not to wrap her in his arms and carry her to the wide bed. He swallowed. “Rough night, huh?”

  Her arms, dwarfed by the robe rolled up at the wrists, wrapped around her waist. “Yeah.”

  How the hell had Dec left her when she looked like that? “You hungry? I could grab us something.”

  “No, I couldn’t eat right now. I’m tired, but I’m too strung out to sleep.”

  “Understandable.”

  “Maybe we could watch a movie or something.”

  God, he wanted to hold her so badly. Every cell in his body screamed at him to. “Sure. Whatever you want.” He so meant that. Whatever she needed from him, he was more than willing to give.

  As she climbed into the bed, he caught a glimpse of her sleek, muscled calves and thighs. The tension in his muscles worsened. A smile touched her lips as she glanced over her shoulder at him, still frozen by the door. “I’m glad you came, Ben. You were right. I don’t want to be alone right now.”

  “Good. Glad I could help.” He felt almost light-headed with the need to go to her. Instead, he dropped his duffel next to the wingback chair and settled into it.

  She stared at him. “You can sit on the bed with me.”

  His guts knotted. “Thanks, but I’m good.” And he was going to be good—Boy Scout good.

  As she switched on the TV for some channel surfing, he hated the awkward silence stretching between them. He should say something to her. Probe a little, then let her open up and unload all the tangled emotions bottled inside. Instead, he watched her profile as she settled on a channel.

  Ben winced as one of the actors was shot. Hands curling around the arms of the chair, he studied her reaction as more bullets flew, tearing apart human flesh and bone. She hugged her knees to her chest, her beautiful face haunted. One of the actors screamed as a round hit him, and she flinched.

  Ah, shit. She so shouldn’t be watching this. “Bryn.”

  Her eyes glistened with unshed tears. “There was nothing else on,” she whispered. Her gaze was full of torment. “How can men kill each other like that, Ben? Like life is nothing to them. Like tonight.” The bewilderment in her grief-stricken voice stabbed at him. She’d gotten another glimpse of his world, and he was damn sorry for it.

  Good intentions be damned, he couldn’t stand to see her suffering. He got up and crossed the room, set his weapon on the nightstand.

  The bed dipped beneath his weight as he took the remote from her, flipping it to an Iraqi news network before pulling her into his arms. She went willingly, huddling against his chest like a child, grabbing fistfuls of his t-shirt and pressing her cheek into his shoulder.

  Goddamn, it felt so right as he hauled her up and cradled her in his lap. When her shoulders shook in a silent sob, he closed his eyes and pressed his face into her silky hair, breathing in her soapy scent.

  “S-sorry,” she choked against the tears.

  “Don’t be. Go ahead and let go.”

  “Oh, B-Ben…”

  “Shh. It’s all right, I’ve got you.” He kept his voice low, soothing, letting her cry as he swept a hand down her back, memorizing the imprint of her body against his. Her tears soaked the front of his shirt while the sobs turned to hiccups, then exhausted little sighs that left her limp against his chest.

  She stirred but didn’t pull away, and for that he was pathet
ically grateful.

  “God, Ben, I’m so scared for all of you.”

  His hand paused in its motion against her hair.

  “I keep thinking about how fragile life is. And you, and your brother, and Dec and Luke out there going after people like Tehrazzi…” She shuddered.

  He blew out a breath, not knowing what to say to ease her mind. Their lives weren’t pretty, and for someone unused to that kind of violence… “We’re good, Bryn. We’ve all been trained by the best programs in the world.”

  “I know, but you’re only flesh and blood.” She sat up and wiped her hands across her cheeks. “I don’t know why I thought I could handle it.”

  “Handle what?” He bit back a protest when she moved away to lean against her pillow. “Tell me.”

  “Everything.” She sighed, staring down at her fingers as they twisted the comforter. “This mission. Setting up Tehrazzi.” She hesitated. “And…Dec.”

  For a moment he couldn’t get his breath, like she’d socked him in the diaphragm. “What about Dec?”

  She shrugged. “I know he’s an operator. I knew that going in, and I still thought I could deal with it. But after tonight, all I can think about is him, or you, or anyone else on the team getting killed.”

  She must have seen something in his face, because her eyes and smile turned sad. “God, Ben, I didn’t know being in love could hurt so much.”

  Yeah, he could relate.

  “Sometimes I wish…that I’d fallen in love with you instead.”

  His fists clenched so hard his fingers went numb. “Why do you say that?” By some miracle his voice stayed steady.

  “Because I don’t think he’ll ever feel the same way about me.”

  Well if the dumb fuck didn’t, then he didn’t deserve her.

  “Like tonight. He kissed me in that alley, he kissed me in this room, then left. Even after what happened tonight, he left me.” She buried her fingers in her hair. “I’m so confused.”