“Are you fucking kidding me?”
“What, you don’t get those itches? And here I am in all my gear, so it’s gonna be hours before I can scratch it.”
I shake my head. “Tell me you don’t actually put your hairbrush on your asshole to scratch it, because that’s disgusting.”
“No, I’m just saying I’m fantasizing about it. Or like a chick with really long nails.”
“It’s no wonder you’re single, man.” I give him a disgusted look and step onto the ice, gliding away from him.
I’m in no mood for Vic’s shit today. Or anything else, for that matter. It’s been three days since Jack got home from the hospital, and Abby’s barely speaking to me.
I get perfunctory responses to my texts about how busy she is. And when I call her out on that bullshit, she ignores me.
Did she decide the kids are too much for her? Get freaked out by Jack being sick? Every time I ask her these questions by text, she blows me off. And when I call, she doesn’t answer.
When Abby and I are together, everything feels right. But with this divide between us, I’m off-balance in most every way.
Jack’s feeling much better. He’s already complaining about me and Sheila forcing him to take it easy. Every time he and the girls ask when Abby will be back, I wonder to myself if she ever will.
If we don’t communicate, we won’t make it. And that’s a two-way street. But if Abby wants to get rid of me, she’s gonna have to try a lot harder than this.
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Abby
I’ve never loved any smell as much as freshly cut wood. The sweet, earthy smell brings back memories of my dad and his workshop. It’s evokes warm feelings and the hope of building something both beautiful and useful.
At my makeshift office at the Schaumburg Cypress Lane site, I get to breathe in my favorite smell every day. I’m overseeing construction of our largest store yet and keeping up with things in the home office through technology.
Busy, busy, busy. I’m back to my old ways, keeping feelings at bay by spending every waking hour working.
I don’t know how else to cope with the loss of Luca and the kids. Even though that loss is completely my fault, it still hurts terribly.
I wasn’t there when Jack came home from the hospital. I’m not there now helping take care of him. I won’t be able to take the girls for our planned spa day in a couple weeks.
And Luca. God, I miss Luca. These past several days have made me realize what I had in him. When we were together, I was closer to whole than I ever thought I would be again. I had a partner. Someone who always had my back, no matter what. Even when we weren’t physically together, he was still there. I knew I could count on him to be there if I needed him.
But he couldn’t count on me in that same way. I’m disgusted with myself for racing out of the hospital that night. My wounds apparently cut deeper than I realized until I was confronted by them.
“Abby,” my construction foreman Don calls.
I look up from my desk.
“Tile samples are in,” Don says. “Want to take a look?”
“Yes.”
I walk over to a table where tile is displayed in several shades and sizes. The bathrooms will be tiled, and it’s time to choose our materials.
Wrapping my cardigan around me for warmth, I look over the different tiles. This store’s walls and roof are done, so we’re dry and out of the wind now. But the interior work, including heating and cooling, is still underway, so it’s getting chilly in here as fall sets in.
“I like this one a lot.” I point to a plank tile with a wood grain pattern. “What do you think?”
“That one would look good,” Don says, nodding.
“Which one do you like best?”
He shrugs. “I’d go with this.” He points to an eighteen-inch slate tile with dark, earthy shades.
“Yeah?”
“I like contrast, and with light wood floors in the showroom, this one would look sharp. But the wood grain would look great, too.”
“No, you’re right. I’m glad you said that. Let’s do the slate.”
“You got it.”
“Hey boss,” one of the workers calls out to Don.
“What’s up, Mack?”
“There’s a guy out here looking for Abby Daniels. What should I tell him?”
Don turns to me. “You expecting anyone?”
I shake my head and do a mental run through of my schedule for today. “No. Could it be a surprise visit from a building inspector?”
“I’ll go see,” Don offers.
“No, I’ve got it. Thanks.”
I walk across the store’s massive subfloor in my practical tennis shoes. I don’t have to dress up to work here, which is kind of nice. I walk to neighborhood restaurants for lunch and dinner without having to curse my heels.
When I step out the store’s front door, I see him and stop moving.
Luca’s leaning against the driver’s side door of his Escalade, wearing jeans, work boots and a worn leather jacket. He’s looking right at me, his expression serious, but not angry.
My breath catches in my throat. I don’t know if it’s because he looks so good, because I miss him so much, or because he’s here. I walk toward him, and he comes my way at the same time.
When he puts his arms around me, I don’t fight it. I don’t even know how. This is Luca, and I love him so much it hurts. We stay like that for a minute, our arms locked around one another.
“How’s Jack?” I ask him.
He pulls back and looks down at me. “Much better. But I’m here to talk about us.”
My heart flutters as I look into his sapphire eyes. I want there to be an us. I want it so badly. But I’m not strong enough to be Luca’s better half.
“I’m sorry,” I say as tears pool in my eyes.
“Is it the kids? Is it too hard for you to be around them?”
“No,” I say, shaking my head adamantly. “It’s not that.”
“Is it me?”
His wounded look is like a knife to my heart.
“Luca.” I put my palms on his chest. “No. It’s not you in the least. I love you so much—”
My voice breaks and I clear my throat.
“Tell me then, Abby. These cryptic texts are driving me fucking nuts. We’re better than this.”
I scoff sadly. “You’re better. I’m a coward.”
“What does that even mean? What’s going on with you?”
“The hospital.” I take a deep breath in and then out. “I was about to jump out of my skin the whole time we were there. I think I had an anxiety attack.”
He nods slightly. “That’s understandable. I’m sorry you were put in the position of having to go to a hospital like that.”
“It’s not just that.” My voice is thick with unshed tears. “When I saw Jack in the hospital bed…” I shake my head and look away.
“It made you think of Chloe.”
I look down, my face warm with shame. “I couldn’t have gone back there, Luca. If Jack had been in the hospital longer or if, God forbid, something had been really wrong…”
“It’s okay.” He rubs my upper arms as I shake my head.
“It’s not okay. You needed me. Jack needed me. And I bailed.”
Luca’s tips my chin upward with his thumb. “You were there. You didn’t bail. I was the one who told you to take the girls home.”
“Yeah, but I was barely keeping it together at that point. I thought I might pass out.”
“I get it, I honestly do. But what does this have to do with us?”
I close my eyes. “You deserve better.”
“Abby.” Luca sighs softly. “There’s no one better than you.”
I start to protest, but he silences me with two fingertips over my lips.
“You survived a tragedy that would have broken most people. You found a way to keep going, and to make a legacy for Chloe that saves lives. You’re smart and so
damn successful. Warm. Compassionate. You love me and the kids and support us unconditionally. You accept us as we are.”
I put a palm over Luca’s heart. “That’s because you’re all perfect.”
“No, we’re not. You just see the best in us. Jack can be awkward and Cora has an edge, not to mention her anxiety. And me…I don’t know if I’m enough or if I’m doing a good job with the kids. I feel guilty a lot, and I get bored watching swim lessons. I cuss in front of the kids. I cry every time I hear the national anthem before a game because it makes me think about my brother.” He exhales deeply and rests his forehead against mine. “And Emerson…I don’t know, she might be perfect.”
I laugh and move closer to him. “I think so. But I think you all are. Swimming lessons are boring. And Cora comes by her anxiety honestly. Jack is amazing if you just give him space to talk when he’s ready.”
“You come by your feelings on hospitals honestly, too,” Luca says softly. “All of us have lost a lot. We get each other. There’s no replacing what any of us lost. The kids could never take Chloe’s place. You can’t take Danielle’s. I can’t take Matt’s. But we’re still a family. We’ve made something together that’s…” He chokes up as he finishes. “my world. You guys are my whole world, Abby.”
My tears spill over and flood my cheeks. I wrap my arms around Luca and pull him close, burying my face against his chest as I cry.
“You guys are my world, too,” I manage to say through my sobs. “I love all of you so much.”
Luca cups my cheeks. “If you never set foot in a hospital again, I’ll still love you. Never think you aren’t enough or that we deserve better. We already have the best there is.”
“Thank you.” I look up at him, wiping a hand over my face.
“Next time, talk to me, okay? Always talk to me.”
I nod. “I will. I promise.”
He kisses my forehead and the brush of his stubble over my skin gives me goosebumps.
“So you’ll come have dinner with us tonight?” he asks.
“I will.” I consider for a second. “Actually, I’m pretty caught up. If you’re going home now, I could just come with you.”
“Yeah.” He smiles down at me. “Even better.”
I go back inside to get my purse and tell Don I’m leaving for the rest of the day, and probably the rest of the week. I’ve got a lot of catching up to do.
“Ready?” Luca asks me as I approach the Escalade.
“Yeah. Let’s go home.”
Epilogue
Luca
There’s something magical about Kauai. It’s not just the lush scenery and the sounds of calling birds and ocean waves. I’m sure we could find those things in lots of places.
When we realized we could fit in a quick trip over the kids’ Christmas break, when I had several off days, too, this is where we all wanted to come. We got the same eight-bedroom beach house we had over the summer, and my parents came with us.
I think the magic of this place is about the five of us. We disconnected from electronics last time and focused on each other. Abby and discovered that we can have quiet sex when we need to, which is most of the time anymore. And the kids were thrilled to explore and island for the first time. We were all lighter here, free from the weights and worries of everyday life.
Abby couldn’t look more beautiful that she does in the dark pink sleeveless dress and big straw hat she’s wearing. Every time she smiles, I’m struck with gratitude for her.
I had no idea what would become of us the night I met her at the Palmer House. If some douchebag hadn’t hit on her, we probably wouldn’t have ever spoken. Sometimes, the curve balls life throws at you end up becoming home runs. That one did.
When Abby and my mom come strolling in from their walk on the beach, Abby stops to kiss me and admire the bonfire my dad, Jack, Cora and I are building. We’ll spend this evening out here in the ocean breeze, roasting marshmallows after eating the steaks I’m grilling.
“I’m not sure I ever want to go back to white Christmases,” Abby says, grinning.
“Me, either.”
Emerson looks over at us, eyes wide with excitement. “Can we come back here next Christmas? Please?”
“We can if everyone wants to,” Abby says.
“I do,” Jack says quickly.
“Me too,” adds Cora.
“We better book it early,” I say. “I was surprised we were able to get it for Christmas this year.”
A smile dances on Abby’s lips. “I think the owner’s pretty cool.”
“Oh yeah?” I arch my brows at her. “Someone you know?”
She shrugs. “Merry Christmas, babe. I bought you a beach house. Well, us.”
“No way!” Jack gapes at Abby.
“Are you shitting me?” I drop the branch I was cutting for the bonfire. “You bought this place?”
Abby nods. After our trip here last summer, I asked my real estate division to see if they could help me pick it up. The deal went through in November.
“How could you not tell us?” Cora’s effort at a scolding tone fails because she’s so giddy she’s practically jumping up and down.
“It was tough,” Abby says. “I was trying to think of a cool way to tell you guys.”
“Oh my God!” Cora cries. “Can I bring my friends here?”
“Sure, we can make that happen,” Abby says.
“On your plane?”
I put up a hand in caution. “We’ll talk about it, okay? Don’t be making plans just yet.”
“Can I put this on IG?” Cora asks me. “Caption: Merry Christmas. Hashtag beach house. Hashtag all ours.”
“Absolutely not. You know my rules for social media.”
Cora scowls and I catch a glint of the braces she’s had since last month. I swear, the kid hit eleven years old and went full adolescent on me.
“We have a surprise, too!” Emerson bursts out.
My heart kicks up a notch. Damn it. I told her at least a dozen times not to say a word, but she’s the worst at keeping secrets.
“Oh yeah?” Abby asks her. “Are you making those cupcakes I like so much?”
Emerson looks pained as she squeezes her lips shut and shakes her head. She gives me a pleading look.
I had it all planned out. There were supposed to be pink rose petals on the ground. We were supposed to be lit by the glow of a bonfire and full from a delicious dinner.
But it doesn’t look like Emerson can keep it in for another couple hours. I wave Jack and Cora over and Abby gives us all a puzzled look. My dad sets down the branch he was cutting and goes to stand next to my mom, putting an arm around her.
“What’s going on?” Abby looks at me, her brows pinched together seriously.
“We’ve got a question for you, babe.”
I walk over to stand in front of her and the kids follow. We’re standing in a row facing Abby. I reach into my pocket and find the little black box inside, then look over at Cora and nod.
She grins. “Will?”
Jack’s been practicing his word, and he delivers is perfectly. “You?”
Emerson cups her hands beneath her chin, practically dancing with excitement as she bursts out, “Marry!”
I get down on one knee on the sand and look up at Abby. “Me?”
Abby squeals with disbelief. I open the box so she can see the shining round solitaire I bought for her. Set in rose gold, it’s perfect for her. Classy, simple and elegant. And the shape of a circle is meaningful to me, because it has no beginning and no end. I think love is often the same; we can’t pinpoint the moment we first felt it, and it never really stops.
“I love you more than—”
“Yes!” Abby cries, interrupting me.
Her eyes widen and she covers her mouth with her hand. “I’m sorry. Go ahead.”
I laugh and take the ring from its cushion, taking her hand and sliding it onto her finger.
“I was just saying I love you more than I ever k
new possible. You’re my best friend and I want to get old and wrinkly and grouchy with you.”
She puts her hand on my cheeks and leans down to kiss me. “There’s nothing I want more, Luca.”
The kids and my parents cheer happily as I stand up and sweep Abby into a massive hug. There are hugs and congratulations all around, and my mom goes into the house and returns with a bottle of champagne she had chilling in the refrigerator in their room.
“Abby, we just couldn’t be happier to have you in our family,” Mom says as a toast.
We clink glasses—the kids’ filled with sparkling apple cider Mom brought out, too—and drink to the future.
A future I never would have predicted, but wouldn’t change for the world. Our family is made up of five imperfect people, but together, we’re perfect.
Author’s Note
Thank you for reading Luca, the second book in the Chicago Blaze series. Your support keeps me writing, and I really appreciate you! The next book in this series, Victor, releases in July.
Reviews help authors so much, so if you leave one, thanks in advance!
Luca: A Chicago Blaze Romance Page 17
