Priceless (Finding Love Book 5)

by Paris Hansen

  For the longest time, he stared at her without saying a word. She couldn’t tell if he was angry with her or happy to see her. She stopped being able to read him the minute they broke up. From that moment forward, he was like a stranger to her and he treated her like they hadn’t been best friends for more than a decade.

  “Fine. If it gets you off my fucking back, I’ll take a shower. You don’t need to be here when I get out.”

  She watched him stomp off before she peeled the sheets off his bed. They looked like they hadn’t been changed in weeks and smelled even worse. She gagged a little as she rolled them up into a ball and carried them to the washer down the hall. She poured in the detergent and then a little extra for safe measure before throwing the offending items into the machine.

  While he finished his shower, she remade his bed and tidied up what she could. For a moment, Andi considered doing as he asked and leaving before he got out, but she couldn’t do it. Taking a shower wasn’t going to knock some sense into him neither was doing his laundry or cleaning his apartment. They needed to talk. It didn’t matter if she was the last person he wanted to talk to or that she was afraid of what would come from their conversation.

  Andi paced the length of the room while she tried to figure out what she would say to him when he returned. When she heard the water turn off, she stopped, the sound of her heart suddenly thundering in her ears. She looked around for somewhere to sit. The bed was the obvious choice, but a dangerous one. She hadn’t uncovered a chair or any other viable option while she’d cleaned his room.

  “I told you that you didn’t need to stay.”

  “Well, you should know I’m too stubborn to listen to you,” she said as she turned to face him.

  Her jaw nearly fell to the floor as she took him in. When she had first entered his room, he’d been half-naked, but she hadn’t given it much thought. Now, she couldn’t help but notice how gorgeous he was standing in the doorway, a towel around his hips and nothing else. It had been three years since she’d last seen him in any form of undress. Three very long years that had been very, very good to him.

  Back when they were together, he’d run a lot and taken weight lifting as an elective in school. He’d always talked about taking up boxing and if she had to guess, he’d finally gone through with it. His new twenty-one-year-old body was reminiscent of ones she’d only ever seen on TV. He had abs, a whole six-pack of them that he’d been working toward the last time they’d been together. His arms were muscular and defined, but not in a beefcake kind of way. He was still lean, but she had no doubt that someday, he’d bulk up the way he’d always wished he could. He was already well on the way to it.

  “I barely know you anymore,” Braeden growled.

  The barb hit her in the chest, her body visibly recoiling from his words. It didn’t matter that they were the truth; they still hurt. Braeden took a step toward her, his features softening as he realized how much his words hurt her.

  “Look, Andi, I appreciate you coming over here and cleaning up the place, but I just want to be alone.”

  “I get it, but I can’t leave you to start making bad choices again, Braeden. If you don’t get your shit together soon, you might flunk out of school. How do you think that would make your dad feel? He wouldn’t want this for you.”

  “You don’t know what he would have wanted for me,” Braeden yelled as he brushed past her. She watched him sit on the bed, his shoulders slumping, his head lowered.

  “I may not have talked to your dad in years, but there’s no way he changed so much in that time that he’d want you pissing your life away while wallowing in your grief,” she said as she sat next to him on the bed, her body angled so she could see him. “Look, I know it can’t be easy. I can’t even imagine what you’re feeling right now. What I do know is that you can’t let your pain ruin everything you’ve worked so hard for. You’re this close to finishing the first step to making your dream a reality. Don’t let this stop you. Get your degree, take the LSATs, kick law school ass, and become the lawyer you’ve always wanted to be.”

  Braeden turned to face her, unshed tears shone in his eyes and it nearly broke her. “I don’t want to be alone, Andi. Without him, I have no one.”

  Her chest ached as she tried to think of something to say. She reached out to brush a strand of hair off his forehead. His eyes closed as she moved her hand down to cup his cheek.

  “You’re not alone, Braeden. You have the guys and you have me. We’ll always be here for you. It doesn’t matter if we’re together or not, I’m still your friend. If you need me, all you have to do is call.”

  His eyes opened, their gazes locking. She’d known touching him had been a mistake the second she felt the heat of his skin against her palm. She’d only meant to comfort him. And maybe it had for a moment, but now, they both knew it felt like more than that. Slowly he reached up and put his hand on hers. With a gentle push, he moved their hands down his cheek, to his shoulder, before finally coming to rest in the middle of his chest. His skin was silky smooth and burning hot.

  Andi knew she should pull her hand away. Knew with every fiber of her being that they were going to go too far, but she was powerless to stop it. She didn’t want to get his hopes up; didn’t want to give him the wrong idea. He moved slowly, almost painfully so, until his mouth was nearly touching hers.

  “Tell me to stop, Andi.”

  “I...I…”

  “Tell me you don’t want this.”

  She tried to speak, but the words wouldn’t come. She tried to swallow past the lump in her throat but couldn’t. Moving forward could do irreparable damage to their already tenuous relationship, but she could tell he needed to feel loved, even if just for the night. He needed to feel like he wasn’t alone. She could give him that, even if it broke them both when it was over.

  She hadn’t planned on anything happening, but she could see that he needed her and to be honest she missed him more than anything. If she could give him what he needed and take a little piece of him for herself, she didn’t see the harm in giving in.

  “If I said that, I’d be lying,” she whispered against his lips as she used her free hand to tug at the towel precariously wrapped around his hips. She wrapped her hand around his thick shaft, showing him how far she was willing to go.

  Braeden groaned a long, low sound that sent shivers up her spine, then he leaned in, capturing her lips with his. It wasn’t like the kisses they used to share which were fueled by love. This kiss was purely out of need. His need to forget his pain. Her need to help him do it. Their tongues dueled for dominance, their teeth clashing together as they scrambled to remove her clothes so she was as naked as he was.

  They broke apart long enough for Braeden to pull her shirt over her head. He deftly opened her bra with one quick flick of his wrist, then pushed the straps off of her shoulders and down her arms. Andi felt like she was going to combust when he palmed one of her breasts in his large hand. It’d been far too long since she’d been touched by someone other than herself and it felt amazing. Braeden always knew how to wind her up and it was obvious he hadn’t forgotten what she liked.

  He slowly pushed her down onto the bed, then covered her half-naked body with his. For longer than she expected they stayed like that, making out like teenagers, their hands making their way around first base, heading full-steam toward second. Braeden slipped his hand into her shorts, his fingers brushing against her clit on their way to her core. She nearly bucked him off of her as he slipped two fingers inside of her. It felt so damn good. It felt perfect.

  She was on edge, barely hanging on as he brought her to the brink.

  “Come on Andi. Give it to me. Let go,” he murmured against her lips.

  With one final flick of his thumb over her clit, she came apart, her whimpers of pleasure swallowed up by another panty-melting kiss. Her nails dug into his shoulder blades as she rode out the wave, his fingers continuing to pump in and out of her, prolonging her orgasm. Braeden sm
iled against her lips before giving them one last quick kiss. Then he was moving down her body, kissing a trail down her neck and collar bone, pausing briefly to suck a nipple into his mouth, sending a jolt of pleasure to her core.

  He continued kissing his way down her body until he reached the top of her shorts. He made quick work of the button and zipper before he pulled them and her panties over her hips. Once they were free of her legs, he threw them over his shoulder, then lowered himself until his face was between her legs.

  The minute his tongue made contact with her clit, she nearly lost it. She was already back teetering on the edge from his slow descent and the anticipation of what was going to happen once he was down there. He ate at her like a man starving for his next meal. It didn’t take long for her to cry out his name, her legs tensing around his head as he milked another orgasm from her.

  “Oh fuck…” she groaned as he sucked her clit into his mouth one more time before kissing it softly.

  Andi’s legs were weak, her heart thudding rapidly in her chest. As Braeden crawled back up her body, she wasn’t sure she could take anymore, but by the looks of him, he was far from done with her. He leaned to his right, reaching for the drawer in his bedside table. He pulled out a condom and she watched as he ripped open the package and rolled the thin barrier over his hard-on. She fought back thoughts of why he had a stash of condoms in a drawer next to his bed. It wasn’t for her to wonder about and even if she wanted to, it definitely wasn’t the time.

  Wrapping her legs around his waist, her eyes met his and her insecurities vanished. The desire she saw there was nearly overwhelming. Their gazes held as she felt the head of his cock at her entrance. Neither of them looked away as he pushed inside of her despite the intensity of the moment. They stilled, both needing a moment to adjust to what they were doing. She felt deliciously full; she couldn’t wait for him to start moving.

  Thrusting her hips up, she took him deeper, a groan escaping both of their lips as he hit the perfect spot. Braeden took her invitation and began to move, slowly at first, but she knew that wouldn’t last. She could see it in his eyes; he was barely holding on. With each slow thrust, she got closer to the peak, but she wanted more, needed more.

  “I’m so close.”

  The words seemed to spur him on until he finally gave her what she was craving. Thrusting into her harder, deeper, faster driving her to the brink again. Her back arched up off of the bed as she tightened her legs around him, his name falling from her lips as she came. It didn’t take long before he was following her over the edge, his body stiffening between her legs as he buried his face against her neck, his final thrusts harder and deeper than before.

  Spent he collapsed onto her, his full weight pinning her against the mattress. Once he caught his breath, he kissed her softly on the lips before rolling off of her so he could dispose of the condom. She was still recovering when he rejoined her on the bed. Her head seemed to be in the clouds, her body made of jello.

  The slamming of a door startled her out of her post-orgasmic bliss. Reality began to set in far too quickly as Braeden’s arm tightened around her waist. She hadn’t meant to take it this far, but she should have known it was going to happen. She was powerless to fight against the pull between them even though she knew it was a bad idea. Nothing good could come from them having sex. They still couldn’t be together, but knowing Braeden, he would jump to conclusions about what sleeping together meant.

  She couldn’t believe she’d done something so stupid. Then again, every stupid thing she’d ever done had involved Braeden in some way. But this one, she wasn’t sure she’d forgive herself for this one. Not only had she taken advantage of his vulnerable state, but she gave him hope when there was none. All because she tended to lose her mind when she was around him. She thought she was giving him what he needed, but instead, she’d made things worse.

  Quickly, Andi extracted herself from Braeden’s grasp and scrambled out of his bed. The blankets she’d piled at the end of the bed earlier, tangling around her feet as she climbed over Braeden’s legs. Stupid small bedroom with its stupid bed up against the wall keeping her from a fast getaway.

  “Andi, what’s going on? What are you doing?” Braeden asked his gloriously naked body on display. Andi quickly turned away from him so his nakedness wouldn’t distract her from her escape.

  “Oh God, we shouldn’t have done this,” Andi said as she scrambled to find her clothes. She hadn’t paid much attention to where he threw them when he’d undressed her earlier. “I’m so sorry, Braeden. I shouldn’t have let this happen.”

  “What are you talking about, Andi? This was exactly what was supposed to happen. Why is this a bad thing? Erin’s getting older, Declan’s got things under control. We can finally be together. You can enroll in school and we can get a place together, just like we always planned.”

  “Braeden, slow down. That’s not what’s happening. I’m sorry, but this was a mistake. We got carried away. It didn’t mean anything,” she said hastily as she slipped her tank top over her head. She still hadn’t found her bra or her underwear and shorts, but she needed to quickly. The conversation they were about to have was not going to go well.

  Tears pricked at her eyes, but she dug deep and fought them back. She wouldn’t cry. She wouldn’t make the situation worse than it already was. It wasn’t that she didn’t still love Braeden. She did. With everything in her, she loved the man. But that wasn’t enough. Not when her family needed her. Not when he needed to focus on school and make up for the time he’d lost while wallowing in his grief.

  “You can’t mean that, Andi. We’re meant to be together. I still love you, I never stopped and I know you love me too,” Braeden said as he watched her search for her clothes.

  “It’s not that easy.”

  She could feel his gaze boring into her, could feel the pain and the anger emanating from him. Her heart broke knowing she was hurting him all over again. He wouldn’t understand. Just like the first time. She hated herself for letting things go too far when she knew it would lead to more pain for both of them. Braeden didn’t deserve it. Especially not with everything he’d been going through.

  Finding her underwear and shorts in the corner by the door, she stepped into them and pulled them up her legs in one fell swoop. She still had no idea where her bra was and it almost didn’t matter.

  “Why not? What’s your excuse this time for ripping my heart out? Do you get some kind of enjoyment from breaking me?”

  “God, no. I hate this. More than anything, I wish there was another way. I never meant for this to happen. I never meant for things to go this far. I only meant to comfort you and maybe knock some sense into you. I’m so sorry, Braeden.”

  Andi turned to face him, knowing it was the right thing to do, but hating that she had to see the pain in his eyes. If he only knew how much it hurt her to not be with him. He thought she was cold and heartless, but she wasn’t. When she hurt him, she was hurting herself.

  “I don’t understand why we have to keep going on like this. I didn’t agree with it when we were graduating, but I got it. Things have changed now. We’re older. Why can’t we move on and finally be happy?” Braeden asked a mix of anger and sadness lacing his voice. “I would give up everything to be with you.”

  “God. Don’t you see? I would never want that. I love you too much to ever let you throw away your dreams for me. I made the decision to give up everything to help my brother. I don’t regret that decision, but there isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t wish I could have it all. But to have it all, I would have to ask you to sacrifice your future and I can’t do that. I won’t do that.”

  “Please, Andi. Ask me. It wouldn’t be a sacrifice if we could be together,” Braeden said as he stood.

  He took a step forward then seemed to think better of it since he was naked. A blush flared over his cheeks as he reached down for his discarded towel on the floor next to the bed. He wrapped it around his waist, then steppe
d toward her. She took a step back without thinking about how it might look. She just knew she couldn’t be within touching distance of him. Letting him touch her wouldn’t do either of them any good.

  “Yes, it would. Eventually, you’d resent me when we’re living with my brother, working menial jobs, and bickering over whether or not you can get the rest of the toothpaste out of the tube cause that shit’s expensive and we can’t afford to waste anything.”

  “Jeezus. That’s quite the life you’ve created for us there, Andi. You can’t know that any of that would happen.”

  “And you can’t know that it wouldn’t,” she shot back as she put her hands on her hips.

  “Just because we’re together doesn’t mean I have to give up going to school. It doesn’t mean we have to move in together or get married. All it means is that I’d get to call you my girlfriend and when we have time to see each other we’d see each other.”

  “What kind of relationship is that? You’re busy with school and internships and the whole college experience. I’m working part-time at night, taking care of a three-year-old during the day. The only reason I’m staying afloat is because we bought the house with the money our grandparents gave us so our mortgage is non-existent and I’m still driving the car my parents gave me as a birthday present when I turned sixteen,” Andi paused, contemplating taking a step forward so she could rest her hand against Braeden’s cheek, but decided against it. “I love you. That hasn’t changed and it never will, but now’s not our time. I can’t stand in your way and I will not be a distraction to you while you do the one thing you’ve always dreamed of doing.”

  “Andi…”

  “I’m not going to change my mind, Braeden. I’m sorry. I hope you know this kills me as much as it kills you, but if we’re meant to be, which I believe we are, then our time is coming.”

  Braeden sighed. She could see unshed tears shining in his eyes. Things would be so much easier if he could understand that she was only trying to do what was best for him.