Thankfully, Remy’s phone chimed, and he dropped the line of conversation.
“Our food’s here,” he announced as he stood up and walked toward my office door. “I’ll be right back.”
“No talking to Sonia while you’re gone.”
He turned to me with an unimpressed eye roll before disappearing through the door. I really hoped he knew I wasn’t kidding in the slightest.
***
Bailey: Hey, I’ve got a grooming appointment for Charlotte tonight. I’m going to swing by around five to pick her up.
Me: Okay see you then!
I looked at the time on my phone and saw I had about a half hour until she arrived. She really didn’t need to give me the heads up like that since she still had a key to the apartment, but I was grateful she had. Who knows what me and Remy could have been up to if he was home?
I busied myself doing my make-up in my room and must have lost track of time because a knock on the door almost made me screw up my liquid eyeliner. I hurried over and opened it for Bailey.
“If you’d made me fuck up my eyeliner, I would have ended this friendship,” I said, pointing at my face.
She rolled her eyes. “I told you when I was coming.”
“Yes, but it’s not like I was watching the clock.”
She shook her head and walked around me into the apartment we used to share. “Why are you getting all dressed up, anyway? Got a date tonight?”
“Hell no. I told you I’m done with dating for a while.”
She raised her brows as she studied me. “So, then where are you going?”
I shrugged and took a seat at the kitchen table. “There’s a Beatles cover band playing downtown tonight.”
She sat across from me, a frown marring her face. “And you’re going alone? Why didn’t you ask me to go?”
“You don’t like The Beatles.”
“Yeah, but I like my friend going to a show by herself even less.”
I waved her concern away. “I’m not going alone.” The words just slipped out, and I silently cursed my big-ass mouth.
“Who are you going with, then?”
“Oh. Uh. Remy, actually. He’s a big Beatles fan too.”
Her hazel eyes narrowed as she studied me and suddenly the wood grain pattern of the kitchen table was the most interesting thing I’d ever seen.
“Now you’re going out with him too?”
I glanced up at her and immediately looked back down at the table. “It’s not like that, Bay.”
“Then what’s it like?”
I blew out a deep breath and sat back in my chair, hoping a suitable explanation would come to me, but I was drawing a blank. And to be honest, it was getting tiring trying to keep this from her. Whatever this was.
“We’re not dating,” I finally said.
Bailey gasped loudly. “But you are doing something, aren’t you?!”
I peeked at her again and found her eyes wide and a big smile across her face. “I guess.”
She laughed loudly and slapped the table. “Holy shit, Belle. How could you keep this from me?!”
I shrugged and traced a line on the table. “I dunno, Bay. I just didn’t want to talk about it. It’s been complicated.”
She sat forward and ducked her head until she caught my eye. “He’s treating you good, right? I would expect Remy to be a gentleman but if he’s not, I will fuck him up.”
I chuckled and shook my head. “No, it’s not him. It’s me.”
“So, I need to fuck you up?”
I rolled my eyes. “I don’t think anyone needs fucking up, Bay.”
She folded her hands in front of her and pierced me with a stare. “Okay, Belle. Time’s up. Just spill. Right now.”
I sighed again and resigned myself to the fact that the cat was out of the bag and there was no getting that asshole back in. I launched into the story of everything that had happened between me and Remy, starting with the graduation dinner hookup and ending with the hot office sex we’d had today. How I wound up in his bed every night even though I still refused to sleep there with him.
Thankfully, she’d kept mostly quiet, but I knew that wouldn’t last long.
“Holy shit balls, Belle.”
I laughed once. “Yeah. Shit balls is right.”
“I can’t believe you’re dating Remy. We’re going to be sisters!”
My eyes widened in alarm as I jolted forward in my chair. “No. No, no, no. We are not going to be sisters and I’m not dating Remy. You’re totally off base.”
She raised an incredulous brow. “You’re not dating?”
I shook my head. “No. Not even a little bit.”
She chuckled once and held up both hands, using her fingers to list her points. “You live together, you bang like bunnies, he stops by to have lunch with you every day, you two have dinner together every night, you go and visit his grandpa with him on Sundays, and now you two are going out on a date tonight. How the fuck is that not dating?”
My head was still shaking. I hoped that if I did that enough times, I could negate everything she was saying. But it wasn’t working.
“We’re not dating. We’re just friends. You and I used to hang out together just as much as Remy and I are.”
She nodded slowly like I was an idiot. I was starting to think she was on to something there. “Yeah,” she said, dragging out the word. “But we weren’t having sex, Belle. And I wasn’t leaving work to have lunch with you every day. You two are totally dating.”
“No,” I said, my head still shaking back and forth. “We’re really not. Remy knows we’re not dating. This is something else. This is… platonic sexing!”
Bailey snorted. “Call it what you want, dummy, but it’s totally dating.”
I looked down at the table again as my mind spun. “This can’t be dating, Bay. I don’t date.”
“I guess you do now.”
I shook my head for the hundredth time. “No. I don’t date,” I said again, as if repeating it would make it true. “You know I don’t date,” I said, the pleading tone in my voice obvious.
She reached out and squeezed my hand. “What’s so wrong with dating Remy? He’s a great guy, Belle. You could do a hell of a lot worse than him.”
My head was still shaking, and my neck was starting to get sore. “You know about my mom, Bay. You know why I don’t date. This can’t be happening,” I muttered as my mind continued to race.
She squeezed my hand again, and I looked up at her. “Belle, this isn’t a bad thing. It seems like you really like him. Why not just cool it and see where it goes? You don’t need to start a wedding registry or anything, just let it happen.”
My eyes widened at wedding registry and I couldn’t get them to go back to normal. I stood up from the table, the chair screeching against the hardwood floor. “I need to end this now. I can’t do this with him.”
Bailey stood too and grabbed both of my arms. “You’re being stupid. Nothing needs to change. I shouldn’t have even said anything. If you were happy with the way things were I should have kept my mouth shut.”
I looked up with her with still-wide eyes. “No. I needed to hear this. I wasn’t seeing things clearly.”
She shook her head sadly. “Belle, please. Don’t do that thing you always do.”
“What thing I always do?”
“That thing where you throw away the good shit that’s happening in your life because you don’t think you deserve it, or you don’t know what to do with it. Just… don’t be a dick right now.”
A chuckle escaped my lips before I could stop it. “Great pep talk, Bay.”
She shrugged and let her arms drop. “I do my best.” Her eyes stayed fixed on me though, and she sighed. “Really, Belle. Don’t be a dick. Just let whatever is happening happen. Don’t shut down in anticipation of things going wrong. Give it a chance.”
We both heard the sound of a car pulling into the lot out back and I knew instinctively it was Remy. It was like I c
ould feel him getting closer. Bailey must have noticed my wide-eyed look of horror because she shook her head and bent to scoop Charlotte into her arms.
“I’ve gotta go, but just promise me you won’t be a dick, Belle.”
“I’m never a dick.”
She laughed the whole way out of my apartment and up to hers. I closed the door behind her and scurried into my room, knowing I needed some time to think before I came face to face with Remy again.
This conversation with Bailey opened my eyes to a bunch of shit I’d let myself be blind to and I couldn’t ignore them any longer. Now I needed to figure out what I was going to do and how I was going to do it before things went any further between us.
Chapter 30
Remy
I left work early that day so I could check on Gramps and get home in time to make the Beatles show with Belle. The stupid smile hadn’t moved an inch off my face since I had lunch at her gallery.
If I was being honest, I loved the fact that she was jealous. I didn’t do anything to make her feel that way of course, but it was nice all the same. To know this went a little deeper with her. That even though this relationship was superficial, it didn’t end there. Not in her mind and definitely not in mine. It gave me hope for our future.
I walked into our apartment, expecting to be greeted by an over excited Jack Russell Terrier, but Charlotte was nowhere to be seen. With a frown, I called out to Belle. When there was a muffled reply from the direction of her room, I walked over and knocked.
“Hey, Belle, where’s Charlotte?”
“Bailey took her to the groomers,” she said from behind her door.
My frown only deepened. “Can I come in?”
“No! I’m getting dressed.”
I grinned at the door. “That sounds like a positive and not a negative to me.” I twisted the doorknob when she yelled out again.
“Remy! Just give me a minute. I’ll be out in a few.”
I frowned again and let go of the handle. “Okay, did you want to grab something to eat before the show?”
I felt ridiculous talking to a friggen door, but it didn’t look like I had a choice in the matter.
“I’m not hungry.”
Okay, now I knew something was wrong. Belle never turned down food. Ever.
“Hey, is everything okay?”
There was a pause before she finally answered. “I’m fine, Remy. Just give me some space.”
I jerked back like she’d hit me. With a shake of my head, I turned around and headed into my room, my mind spinning.
What the hell happened from the time I left her gallery this afternoon until now? It had only been a few hours. How had she gone from giggling and smiling and kissing me to not even letting me in her room? To telling me to give her space?
I wanted to push. To step over the boundary line between us and make her tell me what was wrong. To figure out what was going on and fix it, but I knew I couldn’t do that. The ground I stood on with Belle was shaky as it was. Stomping around on it would only make it crumble beneath my feet.
No, what I needed to do was let her tell me when she was ready. It killed me to wait. Bothered me more than I thought it would to know she was upset about something that she wouldn’t let me help with, but my options were extremely limited. I needed to remember who I was dealing with and put the kid gloves back on.
I stripped out of my work clothes and threw on a pair of jeans and a black t-shirt as my mind continued to race.
Maybe I wasn’t even the problem. Maybe something happened at work. Maybe she had a disagreement with Bailey when she stopped by. There were a million options that had nothing to do with me.
I tied my sneakers and resolved to let it go for now. There wasn’t anything she’d let me do to help, and I needed to accept that. If her issue was with me, I’d hear about it soon enough.
When I was done getting ready, I wandered into the kitchen and over to the fridge to scrounge up something to eat. Maybe Belle wasn’t hungry, but I was starved. Finding the contents of the fridge and pantry depressingly sparse, I settled for a big bowl of cereal.
Although I tried to put her out of my mind, thoughts of Belle were never far away, and my eyes didn’t stray from her door either. So, a little while later when she flung it open, I almost jumped in my seat.
She stepped out looking so fucking hot it made my stomach clench.
She had on a vintage Beatles t-shirt that looked well-worn and fit her perfectly. Tight jeans sculpted her slender legs, and she had on black boots that reached her knees. She was every man’s wet dream, and I had to fight to stay seated where I was.
She glanced quickly at me before looking down at her purse and rummaging through it. I cleared my throat. “Are you ready to go?”
“Yep,” she said to her open purse.
I frowned as I took another bite of cereal. “I’m just finishing up a bowl of your signature dish and I’ll be ready to go.”
She didn’t smile like I thought she would. Didn’t even look up at me or acknowledge I’d spoken.
I swallowed another mouthful of cereal and decided to give this one more shot. “Is everything okay?”
She shrugged, her eyes still on her tiny purse. It was so small, she had to have looked at everything in there twice already. “Yep. Fine.”
I picked up my bowl and drank the remaining milk as I continued to watch her. “Did something happen at work after I left?”
“Nope. Work was fine.”
I set my bowl back down and pursed my lips. “Did I do something wrong?”
She sighed and finally looked up but still wouldn’t meet my eyes. “No, Remy. Can we just drop it? Are you ready to go yet?”
I stood with my bowl and spoon and walked them over to the sink. “Yeah, I’m ready,” I said softly.
She ignored me and stomped her way toward the door and out of the apartment. I watched her go as I tried to ready myself for an interesting evening.
Once the apartment was locked up, I met her out back and we both climbed into my car without a word. As soon as the engine was on, she reached for the radio as usual, but increased the volume until it was too loud for us to talk. Her message was coming through loud and clear.
We drove in silence into downtown Providence, my skin itching more with every mile we covered.
This wasn’t like her. This wasn’t like us. We usually got along great. We talked and laughed and teased back and forth so effortlessly that it felt like we’d been friends for years and not weeks. But that was not the case this evening, and it bothered me more than I thought it would.
We made it to the venue, and I found a spot in an expensive as hell parking lot. As soon as the car was parked, she jumped out like her ass was on fire. I pocketed my keys and fell in step next to her, the walk to the venue just as awkward as the ride had been.
“Listen, Belle, if you’re not up to going to this show tonight we don’t have to. I can take us home no problem.”
“I’m up for it.”
I huffed out a breath and tried again. “You just seem to be in a really bad mood. It that’s the case, a crowded concert venue is probably the last place you want to be.”
“I said I’m up for it, Remy. Just drop it.”
I shook my head and tucked my hands into my pockets as we walked the remaining blocks in an uncomfortable silence. We made it to the back of the line and the tension between us was palpable. I didn’t know what I’d done or what was making her so irritable, but it seemed the more I tried to help, the worse it got, so I kept my mouth shut.
My phone vibrated in my pocket and I dug it out, thankful for something to do.
Ryder: Holy shit, bro! You’re dating Belle?! When the hell did that happen?
My stomach sank as I shot a quick glance at her and furiously typed out a response.
Me: Where the hell did you hear that?
Ryder: Bailey just told me.
I blew out a frustrated breath.
Me: And where�
�d she get that information from?
Ryder: Belle told her today when she picked up Charlotte.
My gaze snapped to Belle again and some of the puzzle pieces began to fall into place. I’m sure those words never came out of her, but if that was the assumption Bailey and Ryder were making, that would explain her foul mood. And the reason why she wanted nothing to do with me.
Me: Well, we’re not dating.
Ryder: That’s not how it sounds, bro.
Me: Well, that’s how it is, dickhead. Let it go.
Ryder: Don’t get cranky with me, Rem. It’s not my fault Belle’s got your balls in a vice.
I rolled my eyes and shot him one last text, already over this conversation.
Me: My balls are safely in my pants and the shit between me and Belle is private. Keep your big-ass nose out of it.
I shoved my phone back in my pocket, ignoring the next couple of times it vibrated. Now that I had some idea of what was going on, I looked at Belle with new eyes.
Of course the idea that me and her were dating would send her running. Honestly, I was surprised she was even with me right now. The fact that she’d still come tonight said something, I just wasn’t sure what.
The line began to move and soon we’d made our way into the venue. It was a dark and open space like most places I’d been to like this, but the long bar on one side of the room was what got my attention.
“Wanna get a drink?”
She looked me in the eyes for the first time since I got home. “Fuck yeah.”
I chuckled as that little slice of the real Belle shone through. Maybe things weren’t hopeless after all.
We made our way over to the bar and she ordered a vodka soda while I got a bourbon on the rocks. I paid for both our drinks and we wandered toward the stage to take our places before the show started. Things were still awkwardly silent between us, but I was hoping the alcohol would loosen her up a little. Maybe get her out of her head a bit.
Because it was clear that was the problem. She wasn’t mad at me, she was mad at herself. Mad that she’d found herself in this semblance of a relationship to begin with.
Beyond Beautiful (Love in Providence Book 2) Page 26
