Timeless (ForNever)

by Rosaline Saul

  Getting in the car, my dad greets me friendly, “Hey, stranger.”

  “Hi.” I want to add stranger, but I do not think he would appreciate my sarcastic humour.

  He drives in silence and when he leaves the town behind, I turn to him. “Where are we going? I thought you still lived in Drogheda.”

  He glances at me. “No. We live in Slane.”

  We. He said we and the we did not include my mom or me.

  The silence is awkward, so I ask him, “What have you been up to?” As an extra stab, I add, “I haven’t seen you for two weeks.”

  “I know. I am sorry, but we have been busy getting everything ready. Shirley spent the whole week getting your room ready.” He glances at me again. He looks hopeful when he says, “She is very nervous meeting you.”

  I am sure she is. She is, after all, a woman who steals men from other women.

  “How old is she?” I roll my eyes in the darkness for being so forward. Do I really want to start the weekend this way? Well, it is closer to turn around now and take me home, I suppose.

  He surprises me by laughing. He asks between gasps of air, “Does it matter?”

  “What is wrong with you? What’s so funny?”

  He is still laughing, but he manages to say, “You. You are so funny.”

  “Huh?”

  He sobers as he says, “Your first question is, how old she is? Not how I feel about her or why I love her instead of your mom?”

  This is my cue. “Why do you love her more than mom?”

  “I love Shirley very much and she fulfils me in a way your mother never could. Your mom will always have a special place in my heart, but Shirley completes me.”

  I scoff.

  He reaches for my hand on my lap and he squeezes it snugly. “I know it sounds clichéd, but she does. It is difficult to explain what it really is that makes me feel this way, but it is just there.”

  Interested I ask, “How did you meet, and don’t tell me at work.”

  He laughs again. I never even knew my dad knew how to laugh. “It was actually at work.”

  Pulling into a driveway, I see the houses surrounding me are nice and I notice it is a newer housing development.

  “Here we are, and to set your mind at ease, Shirley is only five years younger than I am.”

  The front door opens and a woman with long blond hair opens the door. She looks elf-like she is so tiny. She is smiling nervously and hurriedly my dad gets out of the car and rushes to her side. He scoops her into his arms, and she almost disappears into him. Embarrassed I look away.

  I get my bag from the backseat and then I walk toward them slowly.

  My dad turns back toward me with a huge grin on his face, while he keeps his arm around Shirley tenderly. He says, “Shirley, please meet my princess, Heather. Heather, Shirley.”

  He has not called me Princess since I turned ten years old. I think I fell asleep, aliens came and abducted me and then they dropped me back into the wrong earthly dimension. It is the only explanation.

  I smile at her friendly as she says, “Please come in Heather. Can I take your bag?”

  There it is. She is going to treat me like a guest when I am supposed to feel as if this is my home away from home. “No, it’s okay. Thanks.”

  “Come I’ll show you to your room.”

  I follow her up the stairs. As I walk into the room, I am happy to see at least I am not being squashed into the box room and the room is a decent size. The room looks nice. It is decorated in pastel colours ranging between pinks, blues, greens and yellows. The bed has a canopy and sheer lace in pastel shades drape down and is tied back to the posts with large elaborate silk ribbons.

  She looks at me nervously. “If I knew you liked black so much, I would not have used so many light colours.”

  I frown for a few moments as I look at her blankly, then I realize she is referring to my all black outfit. “It’s okay.” I smile friendly. “It’s pretty, I really like it. Black can get boring.”

  She smiles relieved. “I’ll leave you to get settled. I am making hot chocolate, so come down whenever you’re ready.”

  I sit down on the edge of the bed, the straps of my bag still dangling in my hands. I look around the room and pinch my eyes tightly shut to keep back the tears threatening to spill over. I have to go back down, and I cannot do it with red-rimmed eyes.

  After taking a couple of deep breaths, I step over my bag, leaving it on the floor, unopened.

  I look around as I walk down the stairs toward their chatter. The house is nicely decorated. Along the wall down the stairs there are, what must be about a hundred, little miniature paintings. When I stop to look at one, I cannot believe the detail the artist managed to get into such a small amount of space. The carpet under my feet is thick and a rich caramel colour. The wood on the floor in the hall is real wood and not the laminated kind that is in my house.

  I walk into the lounge nervously, there are only two lamplights lighting the room. The room has a somewhat romantic, relaxed feel to it. They are sitting closely together on the couch, and she is sitting under his arm. Looking at them, I think I understand why he loves her. He makes her feel safe and he feels as if he is protecting her—if you considered the sheer difference in size between them. My mother does not need any protection, and I guess this is another Neanderthal thing about my dad.

  My dad lifts his hand from her shoulder a little and points with his finger to my hot chocolate, waiting for me on the coffee table. I smile appreciatively, as I take the mug by its ear and I sit down on the nearest chair.

  My dad asks, “So how is school?”

  “It’s okay.”

  “How’s Shannon?”

  “She’s fine.”

  We do not really have anything to talk about other than my mom or Shirley and we could not discuss either subject in front of Shirley.

  My dad suggests, “There is a nice movie on soon, an action movie, and I know how you like those. Shall we all watch it together?”

  I smile awkwardly. “I don’t mind.”

  We watch the movie and then afterwards we say good night to each other before we scatter to our rooms.

  In my new room, I pull the heavy covers on the bed back, and then I climb into the bed. I find it difficult to find a comfortable position and eventually I just curl up into a ball and I cry myself to sleep.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE

  Jayden and Kieran sit huddled around the computer, clicking link after link trying to find the solution and dismissing each one.

  Kieran sighs deeply as he pushes away from the table and stands up. “This isn’t going to work.”

  “It will, it is the only place on this entire planet where you will find this much information. We just have to carry on looking. I have been thinking, though.” Jayden hesitates. “What if she didn’t choose between us? What if we just left?”

  Kieran turns away from the fridge where he is staring into it vacantly. “What? You don’t know what you are talking about.” He closes the fridge without taking anything out and walks back to the table. “She would probably meet someone else, fall in love, get married, grow old and die.”

  Jayden says, “Exactly—let her just live her life.”

  Kieran shakes his head in denial. “That won’t help, Jayden. We will still be here, when she dies, we will still be here, and then she will be back again, and we will still be here. Don’t you get it? We either break the curse or she chooses you.”

  “So, let her choose me then.”

  Adamantly Kieran hisses, “Never!”

  “You forget you never loved her to begin with.”

  “How do you know? Don’t you think that witch, our mother, was perhaps a little cleverer than you give her credit for? Maybe I did love Heather, but she loved you. Maybe I have also loved her since then, but even if there was the possibility I did not love her back then, don’t you think after three centuries I actually do love her now, that it is no longer a curse which comp
els me to her?” He says softly, “I have always loved her.”

  CHAPTER THIRTY

  The next morning my dad shocks me by making late breakfast pancakes. We eat them with cinnamon sugar and lemon and although it breaks my heart and I feel guilty for betraying my mom, I am friendly with Shirley throughout.

  They take me on a drive through the town and then on a tour of Slane Castle. I have always liked walking around in old castles, so I enjoy the morning. I learn that the Castle re-opened its doors for guided tours in two thousand and one, after an extensive restoration program lasting a decade. In its present form, the Castle dates back to seventeen eighty-five and the famous Gothic Ballroom literally takes my breath away.

  After the tour of Slane Castle, my dad takes us to lunch at a typical Irish Pub and later that afternoon when we get back to their house again, my dad says to me, as we walk into the house, “Shirley and I have to go to the pub to meet friends. I hope you don’t mind. We shouldn’t be gone long.”

  I smile reassuringly. “No, it’s okay. I’ll watch TV.”

  They leave an hour later, all dressed up for a night out. Shirley is wearing a long flowing summer dress, which reaches her ankles and her long blond hair hangs dead straight down her back. I cannot help it when I look at her in appreciation. She definitely looks like an elfin fairy. My father looks distinguished, as always, but he has a relaxed appearance, so he does not look like the same man I know, which is more business-like than relaxed.

  After they leave, I slump down onto the couch. I realize I should have asked him to take me home instead. It is not as if I can go to the kitchen at any time to make myself something to eat, it feels awkward, it is not the same as being at home. I am even too nervous to lift my feet onto the couch, so I sit back and then I select Shannon’s number.

  It rings a few times and then she answers the phone with laughter in her voice.

  I ask, “Hi. What you doing?”

  She shrieks. “No, Dermot. Wait! I am on the phone. Hey, Heather. We are at the beach. What are you doing?”

  “Nothing much.” Everybody is going on with his or her life while I feel as if I am stuck here in limbo.

  She shrieks again, “Dermot!” I cringe as her voice screams in my ear.

  “Shannon.” She does not hear me. “Shannon?”

  “Sorry, Dermot is being his usual eejit self.”

  “There is someone at the door, so I’ll speak to you again later?”

  She laughs exuberantly. “Kay, Heather.”

  I hear her drop the phone. “Gawd, Dermot. Look now my phone is going to be ruined.”

  After I end the call, I lean into the armrest with a long, heavy sigh. I reach for the remote control on the little end table next to the couch, and I switch on the TV.

  I am not sure how long I sit like this when there is a knock at the door. Frowning, I get up lazily and walk into the hall. I stand in front of the door for a few seconds, I am uncertain whether I should just open the door or not. I do not know if this is an area prone to break-ins or gypsies walking door to door to beg.

  I run up the stairs two by two and then in my pastel splash room, I open the window. I lean out, but I cannot see anybody under the alcove in front of the door. I do, however, see Jayden’s car parked haphazardly across the driveway. I decide it must be Kieran, so I twirl around and run downstairs. I jump the last four steps and land safely on my feet. I am so bored, and I am excited to see Kieran.

  I pull the door open and take a step backward when I see Jayden, instead of Kieran. My joy evaporates in an instant.

  He frowns and his eyes tighten when he looks at me broodingly. “Why are you always so unhappy to see me?”

  I apologize, “It’s not that.”

  Abruptly he says, “It’s okay, you thought it was Kieran. I am sorry to disappoint you.” He holds out a flat square box toward me. “Here.”

  I reach for it and hold it in both my hands and as I look down at it, I notice it is wrapped in soft paper. Instead of sticky tape, there is a wax seal with an elaborate JF stamped into it to hold the flaps together. I am reluctant to break the seal because it looks so fancy, so I tear the paper away around it. I gasp and look up at him when I see the contents of the gift. The Script CD I wanted. “You shouldn’t have.”

  He smiles slowly. “I wanted to.”

  Then I realize. “How did you know I was here?”

  He says dismissively, “It doesn’t matter.”

  “It does,” I say argumentatively.

  “Must you always be so aggressive when you see me?”

  Feeling embarrassed I look away from him.

  “Come,” he says. “I want to show you something.”

  I step out of the house hesitantly. “What is it?”

  “You have to come with me in the car. I promise I won’t bite you.”

  “Must I get a jacket?”

  He looks up at the sky. It is clear, hazy blue and the sky goes up and away into forever. Although it is already eight o’clock at night, the sky is still bright, preparing for the long summer days. “Yes, just in case. You never know with the weather here.”

  “Okay. I’ll be back now.” I turn in the door and walk up the stairs calmly, because I can feel his eyes riveted onto my back.

  When I get back downstairs, he is leaning against the hood of his car casually. He looks at the jacket I have draped over my arm and he asks, “Why do you always wear black?”

  I retaliate, “Why do you always wear black?”

  “I am a sorcerer, remember. It comes with the territory. You didn’t answer my question, though.”

  As I pull the door shut behind me, and I hear the latch catch, I realize I do not have a key to get back in again. Frustrated I turn around to Jayden. “I cannot get back inside.”

  “Don’t worry about that now. Come, I want to show you something and it is not going to wait for us.”

  I sigh annoyed and then I walk to his car. I get in and notice I still have the CD he gave to me in my hand. Exasperated I say, “Jeez, I should have left this inside too. I do not want the seal to get ruined.”

  Jayden glances at me amused as he pulls out of the driveway.

  CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE

  “Where are we going?” I ask as he drives out of the estate. “Is Kieran waiting for us somewhere?” I see him sneer as I turn toward him. With the safety belt around me, I cannot turn to him all the way, but I manoeuvre my body so I am facing him as much as I possibly can. “What?”

  Indifferently he replies, “It’s nothing.”

  “So where are we going?”

  “I am taking you to the Hills of Tara. Have you ever been there?”

  “No. My dad always said he would take us there one day, but that one day never came. What’s there that you want to show me, anyway?”

  He shrugs. “It’s just nice, and I thought you would like it.”

  I do not want to ask, but I must. I cannot be running around with Jayden, going to places of interest, when I am in a sort of relationship with his brother. “Where is Kieran, then?”

  I see him close his eyes for a second. He increases the volume of the music, as he says, “I love this song. Listen to the words.”

  I lean my head back and I listen to the song. I recognize the song as a song by The Corrs. I see on the console the title of the song flash across the little screen of the stereo one letter at a time, ‘Make you mine’. I close my eyes so I can listen to the words properly and I smile when I hear him suddenly sing only one line, ‘until you find that you cannot stand to be away, not for a day’.

  I open my eyes and I cannot help laughing.

  He asks with indignation, “What?”

  “You sing beautifully.” I chuckle.

  “Don’t mock me.” He laughs insulted. “I forgot you were in the car.”

  “Ah, now I feel insulted,” I say with fake grumpiness.

  He glances at me apologetically. It looks as if he wants to say something, but I interrupt whatever
he is planning to say, “I am only kidding, and you actually do sing nicely. I was laughing because you were singing with The Corrs, but you always pretend to be so tough, and here you know the words of this charming love song.” I laugh again.

  “I am not going to say another word.” He huffs insulted.

  He drives in silence and I look out the window at the tall trees and shrubbery crowding alongside the road. There is only enough space for two cars to pass each other, and the road winds and twists.

  All of a sudden, he says, “I do not know if it is true, but I heard once these winding roads were built by women and children during the famine, as job creation. They used to build it from tree to tree and that is why it is so twisted and meandering.”

  “That’s interesting, I never knew that.”

  “As I said I do not know if it is true.”

  “Even if it wasn’t, it is actually quite interesting.”

  The trees make way for fields and fields of grass. I can see all the way to the distant, hazy horizon.

  We get to a T-junction and then he turns right. A short distance later, he turns off the road into a little side road. We drive to a parking area and then after he parks the car in the lonely desolated spot, we get out of the car.

  He walks around the car toward me. Grinning mischievously, he says, with a false disappointed tone in his voice, “It looks like we are the only people here.”

  He holds his hand out to me, palm up. I hesitate. I glance up at his face, and then down at his hand again.

  Tentatively, I reach for him and my hand fits perfectly in his. He twines his fingers in between mine and then he leads me through the long, yellow-tipped grass toward a cottage.

  We follow the dirt road around the cottage and then for a moment we stop at the statue of St. Patrick, Patron Saint of Ireland. Together we lean closer and read the inscription at the base of the statue. The black, iron wrought fencing keeps us from getting too close.

  We start walking again and as we pass a large overhanging tree, I see the whole valley ahead of me. It feels as if I can see all of Ireland, all at once. It stretches away as far as my eyes can see. I take a deep breath and smile up at Jayden when I notice him looking at me with a smile on his face.