Beyond Always (Lex and Amanda Series)

by Carrie Carr

  "I feel bad, leaving Helen like this. And I was hoping to see Roy." But as she spoke, Lex allowed herself to be pulled to her feet.

  Amanda's arm immediately went around Lex's waist. "I'm sure Helen will understand. And from the way the doctor spoke, Roy isn't up to visitors. We'll come see him after his surgery."

  Lex grumbled under her breath, but her exhaustion soon won out. "Not like I have a lot of choice, is there?"

  "Nope." Amanda winked at Charlie. "See you later."

  IT WAS AFTER eight o'clock that night by the time Amanda had Lex clean and settled in bed. She knew she needed to go downstairs and reassure their children, but all she wanted to do was sit beside her wife and watch her sleep.

  Between her exhaustion and the pain medication, Lex barely made it through the shower before she fell asleep. Her face still showed signs of tension, even in deep slumber. Amanda lightly rubbed her wrinkled brow in an attempt to soothe her.

  A soft knock at the door turned her attention away from Lex. She smiled at their oldest, who stood in the hall. "Come in, honey."

  Lorrie frowned and looked uncertain. "I just wanted to see how Momma's doing. Is she okay?"

  "She's sleeping," Amanda said softly. "But she'll be fine." She held out her hand. "Come here."

  Taking her time, Lorrie cautiously edged into the room. She stopped a couple of feet from her parents. "She doesn't look very good."

  Amanda turned and glanced at Lex. Dark circles were under her eyes, along with a few small scratches on her face. Her right arm sling was above the covers, and her hand was heavily bandaged.

  "It was a long day." She patted the bed beside her. "Hop up."

  "Are you sure?" Lorrie asked, even as she sat beside her. She lightly placed her hand on Lex's knee. "It's just her arm and hand, right?"

  "Yes."

  Lorrie traced the quilt pattern with her finger. "Mada said that we'll probably all have to pitch in now, since Momma and Roy can't work. Does that mean I have to help check fences and stuff?" She appeared panicked at the words that came out of her mouth. "I mean, I don't mind helping, really. But riding the fences is really boring."

  "No, honey. That's not what Mada meant. Most of the fences can be checked from a truck nowadays. Since Helen will be busy taking care of Roy, Martha will most likely take over cooking at the bunkhouse. But you and your sister can be a big help, too."

  "How?"

  Amanda put her arm around Lorrie and kissed the top of her head. "I'm going to need someone to help with your little brother while I try to keep your Momma from going crazy."

  Lorrie giggled. "Momma does like to work."

  "I don't think she likes it as much as she knows someone has to do it. And she's going to get pretty cranky when she can't do as much as she wants."

  An indignant squall from downstairs caused her to shake her head. "Do you think you can keep an eye on your Momma while I go see what Eddie's so upset about?"

  "Sure." Lorrie looked around the room. "Can I get a book out of my room? I've got to finish two chapters before tomorrow."

  Amanda stood and gave a final glance to her resting wife. "Of course. Why don't you get your pajamas on and get comfy on my side of the bed? I'll be back in a little while."

  She kissed Lex on the forehead. She waited until Lorrie returned before she stepped from the room.

  At the sound of footsteps, Amanda stood by the open baby gate at the top of the stairs and waited. She shook her head at Melanie, who was trying to outrun Freckles. "Mel, you know better than to run on the staircase."

  "But, Mommy, Mada wanted--"

  Amanda held up a finger, which immediately silenced Melanie. Even Freckles slowed down and slinked past her. "Now, what were you saying?"

  "Mada needs clean pajamas for Eddie. He had an accident." Melanie stood on the step below her mother. "Is Momma feeling better?"

  "She's asleep. But if you're quiet, you can go in and see her for a little while." Amanda ruffled Melanie's hair. "I'll take care of Mada and Eddie."

  Melanie gave her a quick hug. "Thanks, Mommy."

  She skipped down the hall toward her room, with Freckles bouncing along beside her. "Come on, Freckles. Let's get my markers and go see Momma."

  Amanda started to call out to her to slow down, but decided against it. She knew that Lorrie would take her job as Lex's protector seriously, and wouldn't allow her sister to be a disturbance. With a heavy sigh, she slowly descended the stairs.

  By the time she was at the last step, Amanda could hear Martha in the kitchen.

  "I ought to put your little rear in the kitchen sink, mister," Martha scolded good-naturedly.

  "Ha!" Eddie countered.

  Amanda peeked around the kitchen door and had to cover her mouth with her hand.

  Eddie sat on the counter, wearing only a diaper and a very satisfied look on his face. His hair was plastered to his head by what appeared to be oatmeal, which also liberally coated his chest and belly. He patted his stomach and giggled. "Pbbbbttt."

  "Don't talk back to me, young man." Martha wiped at the mess on his head with a wet paper towel.

  "No, no, no!" Eddie shook his head. He tried to wriggle away from her, but Martha had a firm grip on his diaper. He swatted at her hand. "No!"

  Martha stopped what she was doing and pointed a finger at him. "I know you didn't just hit me, did you?"

  Eddie gave her his most charming grin. He patted the congealed mess on his stomach. "Uck."

  "That's right, young'un. Uck. Now stay still and let me get you cleaned up."

  Amanda stepped into the kitchen. "Need a hand?"

  "I could use more than two, I think."

  "Mommy! Uck!" As Amanda stepped closer, Eddie tried to jump toward her. "Mada, no!"

  Martha put both hands around him. "You're not going anywhere until we get some of this goop off you. Maybe next time you'll think twice before playing in your food."

  "No!"

  Amanda grimaced. "How about I take him upstairs for a bath? I think you're fighting a losing battle."

  "Are you sure you're up to it? I can always bathe him down here and take him home with me for the night."

  "No, that's okay." Amanda took a clean dishtowel and put it between her shirt and her son, who she picked up and held close. "Are you ready for a bath?"

  "Yay!" Eddie started wriggling. "Go!"

  Martha laughed as she wiped down the counter. "Looks like his majesty has spoken." She turned and kissed Eddie on his cheek. "Be good for your mommy."

  "Muwah." Eddie blew her a kiss and giggled. "Mada, Mada, Mada," he sang. "Go!"

  Amanda tightened her grip. "Thanks for everything today. I don't know what we'd do without you."

  She blew out a shaky breath and leaned her head against Eddie's, not caring if the oatmeal transferred to her own hair. "I have a feeling it's going to get worse before it gets better."

  "Don't you worry about a thing." Martha removed her apron and draped it across a chair. "There's enough folks around here to handle just about anything. I'm going to do the cooking for the hands, and Charlie's going to help Shelby get a handle on what Roy does."

  She hugged Amanda with one arm as they walked from the kitchen. "You take care of Lexie and the kids, and we'll keep an eye on everything else."

  Amanda's laugh came out as a half-sob. Martha's matter-of-fact attitude reassured her more than any words ever could. "You've got it all figured out, haven't you?"

  "Darn right. I've been on this ranch for a lot of years, honey. Ain't nothing we can't fix if we put our minds to it." She stopped at the back door. "If you need anything before morning, just give me a holler."

  She bundled a heavy scarf over her head and buttoned her coat. "I've left a breakfast casserole in the fridge for tomorrow, so you won't have to cook."

  "Thanks, Martha. You're a lifesaver. Have a good night."

  "Mada, Mada!" Eddie added gleefully.

  "I'll see y'all tomorrow." Martha headed out into the cold and wet evenin
g, leaving a bemused and grateful Amanda behind.

  ONCE EDDIE WAS clean and in warm pajamas, Amanda kissed his head and tried to put him in his recently converted toddler bed.

  "No," he argued weakly. His eyes wouldn't stay open, but he refused to go to sleep. "Momma."

  "Honey, Momma is asleep. You'll see her tomorrow, I promise." Amanda tucked a blanket around him, which he promptly kicked away.

  "Momma, Momma, Momma." He pulled himself up and stood, rubbing his eyes with one hand. "Momma."

  The battle had been lost. Amanda gathered his blanket and picked him up.

  "I can't really blame you." She carried him across the hall to the master bedroom. "We might as well..." Her voice trailed off as she stopped inside the door. "What I wouldn't do for a camera."

  The king-sized bed that had been lovingly built by her grandfather was covered with sleeping bodies. Lex was peacefully resting as she had left her, with a couple of additions. Melanie had snuggled against her side while Lorrie was near the foot of the bed, her head pillowed on Lex's shin. Both were covered with the quilt that belonged to Lex's grandmother.

  Amanda tucked Eddie near her wife's left shoulder. He immediately rolled and tangled his fingers in Lex's sleep shirt, his eyes closing instantly.

  "At least they left me some room." Amanda removed Melanie's coloring book, markers and Lorrie's book from the bed.

  After brushing her teeth and changing into her nightgown, Amanda crawled beneath the covers and turned to watch Lex and the children. The long day finally caught up with her and she felt tears burn her eyes. She brushed Lex's hair out of her face and wasn't surprised to feel overly-warm skin. "I knew you'd catch a cold out there."

  Lex opened her mouth and inhaled, releasing the breath in a deep snore.

  Amanda chuckled and pulled the blanket over Eddie. "I wonder if I can get Rodney to make a house call tomorrow."

  She kissed her fingertips and then touched Lex's lips. "Goodnight, love."

  Chapter Eleven

  THE FOLLOWING MORNING was a whirlwind of activity. In the kitchen, Amanda made breakfast while Eddie watched from his high chair. Since their son was easily occupied by the scrambled eggs on his plate, Amanda considered her part of the morning ritual the easier of the parental tasks. Lex's job was to get both girls up and moving for school after she returned from the barn. If they didn't get up in a timely manner, the following school day she'd wake them before her barn excursion, which was almost a full hour earlier. At any rate, she would usually end up having to make more than one trip to the girl's bedrooms to urge them along.

  "Mommy, yum," Eddie said, as he smacked his lips. He had tidbits of egg on his face. He seemed to be enjoying his breakfast.

  Amanda laughed as she checked the clock. "So glad you like it. Your sisters had better get down here soon or they won't have time for their yum."

  "Leelee mm Meemee?"

  "That's right. Lorrie and Melanie."

  Amanda moved to the doorway. "Girls," she yelled, "you're going to be late!"

  Soon, frantic footsteps were heard racing down the stairs. Melanie was the first to enter the kitchen. "Sorry, Mommy. I couldn't find my shoe." She climbed into a chair and reached for a glass of orange juice.

  "You have more than one pair of shoes, honey."

  Amanda placed a plate with Martha's breakfast casserole in front of Melanie. It consisted of scrambled eggs, hash browns, sausage and cheese.

  "Do you want an apple or an orange with your lunch?"

  Melanie chewed a forkful of food before answering. "Orange, please. Like my socks." She wriggled her right foot, showing a bright orange sock.

  "All right." Amanda added an orange to Melanie's insulated, purple lunch bag and placed it on the table next to her.

  Lorrie skidded into the kitchen, sneakers in hand. "Can I have mine in a tortilla, so I can eat it on the way to the bus?" she asked as she sat and hurriedly put on her shoes.

  Amanda placed the wrap on Lorrie's plate. "I figured as much. Where's your--"

  Lex came into the room and dropped into her chair. "You girls about ready?" she asked quietly.

  After she placed an insulated lunch bag beside Lorrie's plate, Amanda took a closer look at her wife. Lex always got up before the rest of them to take care of the horses, so this was the first time she had seen her since the previous evening. She was pale and still wore her barn jacket, but her sling was missing. "Honey? Are you feeling all right?"

  Lex cleared her throat. "Yeah, just a blasted cold." She slowly rose to her feet. "Okay, girls. Get your stuff together and we'll head for the bus stop."

  The girls scurried about and they each got a kiss from Amanda as they left the kitchen to get their coats.

  Amanda stopped Lex before she had a chance to follow. "Do you need me to take them?"

  "Nah." The tickle in her throat couldn't be ignored any longer and Lex coughed so hard that she had to grab the back of a chair for balance. She took a couple of slow breaths. "Whoa."

  When Lex coughed, Amanda immediately put her arm around her waist to keep her from falling. "I think you'd better stay here. I'll take the girls."

  Lex straightened and shook her head. "I'm fine." She wasn't fast enough to avoid the hand that touched her face. "Stop it."

  "Honey, you're burning up. Please stay here."

  When Lex opened her mouth to argue, she was seized by another cough. This time, she found herself guided to the chair. While she caught her breath, Amanda unbuttoned her coat.

  "You and Eddie keep one another company while I take the girls," Amanda gently ordered. She carefully slid the coat from Lex's shoulders. "Where's your sling?"

  "Upstairs."

  Amanda caressed her wife's cheek. "Do me a favor?"

  "What?"

  "Don't try to lift Eddie out of the high chair. I think he gained five pounds last night."

  Lex leaned into Amanda's hand and kissed her palm. "No problem."

  WHEN AMANDA RETURNED from the bus stop, she found the kitchen empty. And clean. "I'm going to kill her," she muttered.

  She heard Eddie laughing and followed the sound to the living room, cursing her wife's stubbornness. "Dammit, Lex, your arm won't heal--" Her voice trailed off when she saw Charlie and Eddie on the living room floor. "Where did you come from?"

  Charlie looked up from the building blocks that Eddie had gleefully knocked over. "I was born in Bastrop, but I don't guess that's what you're asking."

  Eddie carefully stacked one block on top of another. "Boom!" he slapped at them, causing the top one to skitter across to Charlie. "Mommy!"

  Amanda sat on the footstool and brushed Eddie's dark hair back. "That's good, honey. Can you stack them higher?"

  Eddie gathered several blocks and began to put one on top of another.

  Charlie gestured toward the ceiling. "She's upstairs."

  "Did she ask you to come over?"

  "No. I called to see if y'all needed anything from the store, and she could barely talk. I figured she needed some help. I sent her upstairs as soon as I got here. She looked like he--" He stopped and glanced at Eddie. "I mean, like she had been wrung out. When she tried to argue with me, I threatened to call my wife."

  "Ha! That'll teach her. Thanks, Charlie. If you're okay here, I'll run up and check on her." "Sure, no problem. I've got this young "˜un to keep me company. Right?" he asked Eddie.

  Eddie picked up a block and tried to bite it. "Ugh." He stuck his tongue out and made a funny face. "Uck." He handed the slobbery wood to Charlie. "Pawpaw?"

  Charlie took the block and wiped it off with a tissue. "Thanks, buddy. Why don't you show Pawpaw how to build a fence?" He winked at Amanda, who used the opportunity to sneak from the room undetected.

  As she navigated the stairs, Amanda tried to think of some way to get her wife to take it easy for a day or so. She had a good idea of the arguments that Lex would use. Unfortunately, many of the points Lex would make would be perfectly reasonable. With Roy incapacitated, some
one had to take charge. Shelby didn't know all the ins and outs of the ranch just yet, but Amanda hoped she was a fast learner.

  At the top of the stairs, Amanda could hear Lex cough in their bedroom. She grumbled under her breath and walked into the room, ready for a battle. She froze when she saw Lex kneeling beside the bed. "Lex!"

  Lex ignored her and used the bed to pull herself up with her good hand. She took a shallow breath, then another. "I'm okay," she wheezed as she rubbed her chest with her good hand.

  "That didn't look okay to me." Amanda put her arm around Lex's back and forced her to sit on the bed. "I'm calling Rodney."

  "No." Lex tried to get up, but Amanda had a firm grip on her. "It's just a cold."

  "Like hell it is. You've had colds before, and none of them have taken you to your knees." Amanda reached for the phone on the nightstand. "He might have time to see you this morning."

  Lex caught her hand. "Wait. Maybe it's not just a cold. I swallowed some creek water and it made my throat sore. Between that and the allergies I've been fighting the past week, I've got a little bit of a cough."

  She cleared her throat. "There's a ton of stuff to do since Roy's laid up. But I'll try to make it a short day, all right?"

  Amanda squeezed her hand. "Damn. Why didn't you tell me before now? And, no, it's not all right. Going out in the cold air will make you feel worse. You hired Shelby for a reason. Let her and the guys handle things. How about a compromise? Take some heavy duty cold meds and sleep until lunch." She looked into Lex's eyes and added softly, "Please?"

  "You know, one of these days that look isn't gonna work on me," Lex whispered. "All right. I'll call Shelby and let her know she's on her own."

  "Save your voice, and let me give her a call. I saw her drive up while we were waiting for the bus. Right now she's probably fending off Martha's offer of breakfast."

  Amanda stood. "Need help with your clothes?"

  Lex tried to give her a sexy grin, but ended up coughing. Once she was able to breathe again, she lowered her head and watched as Amanda carefully removed her shirt.

  "This would be a lot more fun...if I could catch my breath." She stifled another cough.