Beyond Always (Lex and Amanda Series)

by Carrie Carr

  "Love you, too," Shelby whispered. "It's gonna be all right."

  LEX STEPPED OUT of the barn and blinked to adjust her eyes to the mid-morning sun. Not far from the house, one of the doors to the garage was open. "Which one of those dumbasses forgot to close it, this time?"

  As she neared the open door, she found the interior light on as well. "Damn it. Those idiots need to be more careful."

  She stood inside the doorway of the garage and glanced around. The protective cover for Amanda's Mustang was in the floor. The sixty-seven, powder blue car had been a gift from Amanda's grandfather, and was rarely driven.

  "What the hell?" Lex moved close and saw a familiar form slumped against the steering wheel. "Amanda?" She half stumbled, half ran the rest of the way to the car, to squat beside the open driver's door. "Hey."

  Amanda raised her head and looked mournfully into her wife's face. Her eyes were puffy and red and she had tear tracks down her cheeks.

  "Aw, sweetheart. Come here." Lex pulled Amanda from the seat and onto one her knee. "I'm so sorry."

  "He loved this old car," Amanda whispered.

  Lex kissed her hair as she continued to stroke Amanda's back. "He loved how much you loved this old car." Her voice was as gentle as her touch.

  "I think you're right." Amanda rested her cheek against Lex's chest. "I just can't seem to get past him being gone. I think I'm doing fine, then something just hits me and I realize I'll never see him again."

  "Yeah. I find myself picking up the phone to call and tell him a joke. He always loved the ones I'd get from the guys at the bunkhouse."

  Amanda brushed her hand down Lex's smooth, cotton shirt. "Then Gramma would catch him relaying it to a friend and chew him out. He enjoyed that most of all, I think."

  Lex laughed softly. "Good thing I'd only pass along the tamer ones then, huh?"

  "Definitely. I think they both loved the game. God, I don't know how she's survived this. But when I call her, she tells me she's fine. And I know she's lying, but we both pretend it's okay."

  "I try to stop by any time I'm in town. But she runs me off pretty quick." Lex blew out a heavy breath. "Maybe we should see about bringing her out here, at least for a while. I worry about her being alone in that big, old house."

  "Good luck. She wouldn't even let me bring the subject up. Stubborn woman."

  "Family trait." Lex didn't get the expected poke or slap. "Sweetheart, I think we're going to have to realize that she's a grown woman who knows what she wants, and she's not about to take any crap from us about it."

  "I know. But it's so damned frustrating." When her seat wavered, Amanda said, "I must be killing you." She climbed off and helped Lex to her feet. "Thanks."

  "I'm glad I found you. I don't want you going through this alone." Lex put her arm around Amanda's waist. "What caused you to come in here?"

  Amanda leaned into her wife and fell into her embrace. "I don't know. After I saw the girls off on the bus, I just needed to feel closer to him. I sound like an idiot, don't I?"

  "Not a bit. You both put a lot into this old car, it's only natural you'd feel closer here."

  They spent a few minutes staring into one another's face. "You have very expressive eyes."

  "Yeah?" Lex grinned to lighten the mood. "Know what they're saying right now?"

  Amanda smiled as well. "I have a pretty good idea." She kissed Lex's chin and squeezed her. "And for the record, I agree. I think a nap is exactly what we need."

  Lex gave her the lead as they left the garage. "I was actually thinking more of a morning ride."

  "Uh huh. What I think is that we can't be too careful with your health."

  "Really?" In one quick motion, Lex kept one arm around Amanda's shoulders and the other behind her knees to scoop her off her feet.

  "Lex! Stop it!" Amanda squealed. "You're going to hurt yourself."

  "Open the gate."

  Amanda opened the gate and put her arms around Lex's neck. "You're not planning on carrying me all the way upstairs, are you?"

  "Nah." Lex slowly navigated the sidewalk and steps. "Door, please."

  "Yes, dear." Amanda pushed the door open. "Who did you pawn our son off on?"

  Lex snorted. "I did no such thing. Helen needed a babysitter for Roy, and who better than a real baby?" She started breathing heavy before they reached the stairway. "I think this is the end of the ride, ma'am."

  Amanda landed nimbly on her feet. "Are you all right?"

  "Yep." Lex inhaled then slowly released the breath. "See? No cough." She leaned closer and kissed Amanda. "Wanna race upstairs?"

  "Nope." Amanda loosely put her arms around Lex's waist. "Thanks for coming to get me, love. Sometimes I get so bogged down in everything, I forget what's really important."

  Lex cupped her cheeks and stared into her eyes. "You're the most important thing in the world to me, Amanda. I hope you realize that."

  "I do. It goes both ways, you know."

  "Yep." After a soft kiss, she ran her fingers through Amanda's hair. "I love you."

  "I love you, too. Come on. Nap time for cowgirls."

  THE MID-AFTERNOON TRAFFIC made downtown parking difficult, but not impossible. Rebecca found a space less than a block from the diner. She checked her hair in the rear view mirror before she got out of her car.

  As she walked toward her destination, she brushed her hands down her black, knee-length skirt. Along with the white, silk blouse she had borrowed from her mother, she felt completely overdressed and uncomfortable. She couldn't wait to get back to her parents' house and change into her jeans.

  When she reached the entrance of the diner, an elderly man held the door open for her as he was leaving. "Thank you."

  He tipped his gray western hat, dusty and stained with age. "Miss."

  Rebecca stood inside the door and took a deep breath, then let it out slowly. It was well past lunchtime, yet several booths and many of the counter stools were in use.

  "Well, don't just stand there, honey. Come on in," a well-bosomed blonde chided from behind the counter. Her platinum hair was too bright to be natural, and her lined face covered in makeup didn't hide her age.

  "Um, thanks." Rebecca took the nearest vacant stool. "I saw your ad in the paper and would like to apply for the part-time waitress job."

  The nametag on the blonde's chest was faded and chipped. Francine stopped in front of Rebecca and scratched her head with the eraser of her pencil. "Why would you want to do that, hon? This old place ain't for someone as young and pretty as you."

  "I need a job," Rebecca whispered. She shifted on the stool and leaned closer to Francine. "Please. I'll do whatever you need. Wash dishes, mop, anything."

  Francine glanced toward the window to the kitchen to make sure they wouldn't be overheard. "Trust me, you don't want to work here. The money's shit, the hours are worse and the boss," she gestured over her shoulder, "is a sorry bastard." She took a coffee cup from beneath the counter and placed it in front of Rebecca. "You ever done this before?"

  Rebecca shook her head. "But I'm a fast learner."

  "Your husband leave you?"

  "No, nothing like that. I worked at Carson's, but business was slow." She wrapped both hands around the empty mug. "I really need the work."

  Francine cocked her head and nodded. "I understand, sugar. But you won't get much here, I'm afraid. Rusty just wants some young thing with a nice ass and tits. Not that yours aren't nice, "˜cause they are. But you can do better."

  Rebecca blushed and barely kept from covering her chest with her hands. "Um, I don't...I mean--"

  "Oh, hon. You're too cute," Francine teased after she stopped laughing. "Carson's?"

  "Yes." Rebecca kept her eyes on the coffee cup. "I was an assistant manager, up until recently."

  The middle-aged man at the other end of the counter tapped his empty cup on the counter. "Francine, I could use a refill."

  "Hold your horses. Why don't you go get rid of the first four cups, Earl? I'll be
there in a sec." Francine turned to Rebecca. "I've heard they need some counter help at the feed store. Don't you think that might be a bit more your speed, sweetie?"

  "Really?" Rebecca placed her purse on her lap and opened it. "Let me pay for the coffee, then I'll go by and see."

  Francine covered her hand. "No need. You just tell "˜em Francine sent you, all right? And if that don't pan out, I think the Rocking W may be looking for help."

  "My partner already works there," Rebecca answered then blushed. She hadn't meant to share such personal information with a complete stranger, no matter how friendly that stranger seemed to be. "Uh."

  With a saucy wink, Francine laughed. "Well, next time you see Lex, you tell her Francine said hello. Go on, now."

  She turned away and took the glass coffee pot off its burner.

  THE TREES ALONG the residential street dropped their buds on Michael's windshield, which left a powdery, yellow mess. He grumbled and used his wipers to clear the debris away, only to be hit again as the brisk March breeze knocked more free. He was on his way to his mother's before work. A daily ritual since his father passed away, he would often try to discuss her bills or expenses, although Anna Leigh didn't always seem to appreciate his input.

  He frowned as he pulled into her driveway. Jeannie's SUV was taking up two spaces, and he had to park behind a rusty, beat-up truck that he'd never seen before. He slammed his car door and stomped up the walk.

  As he ascended the steps to the porch, the front door opened. Two people were carrying a large, oak dresser. "What's going on here?"

  The person closest to Michael backed into him. The man stopped and was shoved when his partner kept moving. "Hey, watch it."

  "Oh, hey, Mr. Cauble," Kyle greeted him. "Could we squeeze by you? This thing is heavy."

  He stepped off the porch and stared at them as they carried the piece to the truck.

  "Michael, hello," Anna Leigh called from the door.

  "What are they doing?" he asked as he followed her inside.

  Anna Leigh continued to the kitchen as if she hadn't heard his question. "I believe there's enough coffee left for one more cup, but I can always start another pot."

  "Don't bother, Mom." Michael stood beside the table with one hand on the back of a chair. "I've got an early appointment this morning, anyway. Where are they taking the dresser?"

  "To the VFW pavilion." She turned from the coffee pot and brushed her hair away from her eyes. She hadn't been to her hairdresser since before her husband died, and her usually short style had grown out. There were more lines in her face than before, and dark shadows beneath her eyes that not even a week's sleep could erase.

  He heard a thump from upstairs. "What's going on?"

  "The high school needs new band uniforms, and they're having their annual rummage sale this weekend. Jacob always donated a few pieces for them." Another thump caused Anna Leigh to look up at the ceiling before taking a seat at the table. "Jeannie is cleaning out two of the rooms for me."

  Michael shook his head as if to clear it. "Excuse me? Why haven't I heard about this? And just how much stuff are you giving to them?"

  "I don't care for your tone, Michael. Please sit so we can discuss this rationally."

  He angrily shoved the chair away from the table. It tipped and landed on the tile floor with a loud crack. "My tone? I've done everything I could for you since Dad passed away! How dare you keep me out of the loop!"

  "Um, excuse me. Is everything all right?" Kyle stood in the doorway, her friend right behind her.

  Anna Leigh nodded. "We're fine. Michael was just leaving."

  "We'll get the bed from the back bedroom, if that's okay." Kyle waited for the older woman's nod, before giving Michael a pointed look. "If you need anything else, just holler."

  "Thank you, Kylie."

  Once they were alone, Michael picked up the chair and resettled it. "I'm sorry, Mom. I just want to help you."

  "Yes, but taking control of my life is not helpful. I'm fully capable of making my own decisions." She rested one hand on the other atop the table and stared at them. "And one of those decisions has to do with this house. I can't stay here any longer."

  Michael dropped into the chair he had righted. "You're selling it?"

  "No, dearest. I'd like to give it to Jeannie and Rodney."

  "I see." He rubbed his face and stood. "If you're sure about this, I'd better let Lois know. We'll need to clean out and paint the guest room, maybe install a new sink in the hall bath."

  It took a moment, but Anna Leigh finally understood. "I'm not moving in with you and Lois, Michael."

  "Of course you are. Where else would you go? To the ranch? Nothing against Lex and Amanda, but you'd never get any peace if you stayed there. Our place is perfect."

  Anna Leigh had heard enough. She slapped the table with the flat of one hand. "I've made my plans, Michael. And that does not include becoming a burden to my family."

  "A burden? What are you talking about?" He sat next to her and put his hands over hers. "Mom, please. You've obviously distraught. Now isn't the time to be making these sorts of decisions. It's only been three months."

  "I know exactly how long it's been." She gentled her tone. "Darling, you must understand. I'm not feeble, nor overwrought. But this house is far too big for me to stay in alone."

  "But, where will you go?"

  She patted his hands before she sat back. "I've found a lovely little duplex not far from here. It's perfect for my needs and has recently been renovated."

  "All right. Then I'll--" Michael was stopped by her steely glare. "Uh, is there anything I can do to help, Mom?"

  "Not yet. But thank you." Anna Leigh graced him with a real smile for the first time in months.

  THE RINGING PHONE brought Amanda out of her pleasant dream and she fought her way from beneath the covers. She glanced at the clock, relieved she still had more than an hour before the school bus dropped off the girls. As she stretched across Lex, her wife opened her eyes.

  "Hey." Lex's arms automatically circled Amanda. "Aren't you tired?"

  The phone rang again.

  "Oh." She laughed and quickly kissed her wife and reached for the phone. "I'll get it. Walters."

  "Lex? This is Michael. Is Amanda nearby?"

  Lex sat up and grinned at her equally naked partner. "Uh, yeah. She's right here. Hold on." She handed the phone to Amanda. "Your dad," she whispered.

  Amanda covered herself with the sheet and accepted the handset. "Hi, Daddy."

  "You need to talk to your grandmother. The more I think about it, the madder I get."

  "Gramma? What do you mean? I talked to her yesterday. She seemed okay to me." Amanda met Lex's questioning look with a shrug. "Is she all right?"

  "I think she's finally lost her senses," he snapped. "Did you know she wants to move?"

  Amanda dropped the sheet and slid out of bed. "What? Since when?" She held the phone to her ear with one shoulder as she reached for her robe.

  Lex gave a low whistle as Amanda bent to pick her robe up off the floor. She waggled her eyebrows at the look she received, then sighed as Amanda covered up.

  "How the hell should I know? I went there this morning, like I always do, and she was donating furniture to some rummage sale. Furniture that my father spent a lot of time building. Can you believe that?"

  "Daddy, they've always--" Amanda trailed off as Lex got out of bed and slowly stretched. She covered the mouthpiece of the phone. "Stop that!"

  Lex gave an exaggerated yawn and stretched again. She staggered backward as a pillow hit her in the chest. "Brat."

  "Are you listening to me?" Michael asked.

  "What? Oh, um, yeah. Sorry." Amanda shook her finger at Lex, who waved and disappeared into the bathroom. She replayed the conversation in her mind. "Wait. Gramma actually told you she wants to move?"

  "She's already got a place picked out, and said she's going to give the house to your sister. Haven't you been paying attention?"
<
br />   "I'm sorry. But when did she decide this?"

  "This morning was the first I've heard of it. And I'm the one that should take care of everything. She didn't even bother to consult me first."

  Amanda rolled her eyes. "Okay. I'll give her a call and see what's going on. But, if she's made up her mind, there's not much anyone can do about it. And I can't say that I blame her. That house is far too big for her to stay in alone."

  Hearing the sound of the shower starting, she removed her robe. "I have to go, Daddy. Lex is..." she blushed. "Lex needs my help with something."

  "Fine. Could you call me, later?"

  "Uh huh. Love you, bye." Amanda turned off the handset and tossed it on the bed. She hurried into the bathroom and opened the glass shower door. "Starting without me?"

  Lex tugged her inside. "Never."

  Chapter Seventeen

  IT WAS MID-AFTERNOON when Shelby received a call to return to Roy's. As she drove toward the house, she tried to figure out why. Going through the past few days of work in her mind, she couldn't come up with anything she did wrong, but the summons still worried her. She enjoyed her job at the ranch, and now with Roy able to move around more, she feared he had changed his mind about working less.

  To Shelby, the few short months she had been here were the most rewarding of her professional life. She'd found a place that felt right, and a job that seemed to have been tailor-made for her. She respected her boss, and had even made a good friend in the process. "Damn. I didn't want to lose this job."

  She parked between the house and the corral, so she could spend a few minutes with the horses on what she assumed was her final day of work.

  Unable to put it off any longer, Shelby trudged up the steps to the house. She was met at the door by Roy, who shook her hand.

  "Come on in, Shelby. Hope you weren't too busy when I radioed you."

  Shelby wiped her boots on the mat and removed her western hat before following him inside. "Nah, not really. Just checkin' the south pasture for strays. The guys seem to be taking care of their responsibilities just fine."

  "That's great. Let's go into the office." Roy led the way, his walking cast making a loud thump on the wooden floors with every step. He waited until she sat in the visitor's chair before he closed the door and took his own seat. "The boss and I had a pretty long talk about you this morning, Shelby."