The American People, Volume 2

by Larry Kramer

  But these sick guys were getting themselves together. They were learning to fight back a bit while they still lived. Under Michael they had actually caucused and come up with a manifesto for the group he was starting, the National Association of People with The Underlying Condition (NAPWUC). This manifesto became known as the Denver Principles. The first principle was and remains: “We condemn attempts to label us as ‘victims,’ a term which implies defeat, and we are only occasional ‘patients,’ a term which implies passivity, helplessness, and dependence upon the care of others. We are ‘People with UC.’” They went on from there. They demanded to be treated decently in all ways and laid out compassionate specifics. They would not be scapegoated. They would not be fired from their jobs. They were to be included in all levels of decision-making. They would live—and die—in dignity. It was an impressive and moving list. They had made themselves a big banner from some of the Holiday Inn’s sheets, and they stormed the closing session of the conference to present their demands. One after another physically wasted Person with UC declaimed each of their new principles. There was not a dry eye in the house.

  My speech was rescheduled opposite a “keynote” speech to the doctors by Kiefer Kreditz so my audience was a scattering of NAPWUCs. Even Bruce, with Tommy, went to the doctors’ session. Bruce said, “It was disgusting. And they don’t like us, that’s for sure. Why did we come here, to be treated like shit?”

  “It was meant to be a conference of togetherness,” Tommy said. “But they’re burned at not successfully screwing us out of that twenty-five thousand bucks.”

  I thought the whole meeting was weird. Breaches of unity were appearing everywhere, not only NAPWUC vs. Everyone, but doctors feeling so overwhelmed with what was obviously the heavy-duty shit ahead that they were already preparing to abdicate right and left, scattering their good intentions like dying autumn leaves. Many of them couldn’t wait to get back to good old anonymous New York and their closets. “Lemish, you are a dishonest crook,” some creep named Martin Paleski yelled at me at one point. And another guy, this one a Hispanic patient, yelled out that GMPA was now so rich it didn’t have to pay any attention to anyone except rich white men. To which the annoyed doctors, for some reason, cheered. To which of course Bruce had to get up to reply to the doctors, who now booed him, something new for him. For some reason I cried out, “The pot is calling the kettle black.” To which a black guy with UC got up and yelled, “Hey, Lemish, watch out what you say about blacks!”

  Dr. Kiefer Kreditz disappeared. I was told he was sick. I know Martin Paleski died, because he got an obit in The Truth. They had started out as a social organization, no doubt to meet others like themselves who might be date bait; but now physical interactivity was becoming a lot of those autumn leaves. The first national gay and lesbian organization devoted to gay and lesbian health, which was what this was meant to be all about, had gotten off to a lousy start. It was proceeding as every other gay group always proceeded, to make itself irrelevant.

  EQUAL TO MURDERERS

  To:

  Mr. Punch Dunkelheim, The New York Truth

  Dr. Dearie Fault, The New York Truth

  Mr. Jacob Flourtower, The New York Truth

  Ms. Velma Dimley, The New York Truth

  Judge Richard Gasp, Gay Men Pay Attention

  Mr. Tommy Boatwright, Gay Men Pay Attention

  Mr. Bruce Niles, Gay Men Pay Attention

  Ms. Tallula Giardino, Lesbian and Gay Union

  Dr. Herta Glanz, NYC Commissioner of Health

  Mayor Kermit Goins, City of New York

  Mr. Hiram Keebler, Mayor’s Liaison to the Gay Community

  From:

  Fred Lemish, writer/activist

  I am attaching an article from last Friday’s Washington Monument entitled “Epidemic Is Expanding, Not Shrinking, Experts Say.” As you can see, this was a main, featured article, appearing on page A-3.

  Why hasn’t this information been conveyed to people in New York?

  Why is there so little information passed on to the New York gay community about the appalling continuation, the march of this epidemic? After all, New York is still the worst hit, but you would not know it from reading The New York Truth, or any of the blather put out by any of the above. The worst epidemic known to modern man is happening right here in this very city, and it is one of the best-kept secrets around.

  That all of you listed above continue to refuse to transmit to the public the facts and figures of what is happening daily makes you, in my mind, equal to murderers, with blood on your hands just as if you had used knives or bullets or poison. Because you continue to refuse to inform New York’s population, the perception by the average gay man is that this epidemic has disappeared or leveled off or improved or never been heard about in the first place. Because The New York Truth is not reporting any vital news, because the city’s Department of Health is not releasing cautionary recommendations, because the gay community’s own organizations are too cowardly to speak out and speak up—all of this perpetuates the widespread ignorance that can only make for continued contagion, infection, and death. The average gay man is living with his head in the sand.

  In the name of God, Christ, Moses, whatever impels you to, at last, perform acts of humanity, when will you address this issue with the courage it demands?

  * * *

  My use of “equal to murderers” in attacking my own people, some of my once best friends, is not new. I had called them the same when I was thrice rejected for reinstatement to the GMPA board. My reputation by now is that of a crazy man. I am already being dubbed “the angriest gay man in the world.” Me?

  BRINESTALKER MARCHES ON

  The next step, or the continuing step, or the step that was my intention all along, is to find out how many homosexuals we are presently talking about, how many are going to get sick, how many we can make sick, how long this will take, and how much we have to budget for it. The problem of staff continues to be a major one. There is this special sales task force out there pushing DridgePlusOne, and shortly, they shall have ZAP, but their distribution of both will of necessity be confined to just that, selling these products.

  The partner to this next step, of course, once we have numbers on a wide-enough scale, is to isolate their locales and habitations (of course, I mean, “where they live”) so that we can concentrate on further infecting them in situ. It is our good fortune that they are already cooperating with us to some extent. For instance, they choose, indeed they prefer, to live and play among themselves. And, wonder of wonders, I hear that the infected are enthusiastic about participating in anything that might portend a “cure.” Our friends inside NITS indicate there’s a mad rush of inquiries about enrollment and slots are filling up quickly.

  It is all proving easier than anticipated. I am wondering if we can further co-opt their population to participate in the calculations of their numbers, of both infecteds and healthies. They now have in existence in all major cities organizations pledged to care for victims of this disease, New York’s GMPA being a good case in point. I understand they are exceptionally committed individuals. They believe accurately that our government is intentionally ignoring them. So this very fear can be made to serve as an incentive for them to do this work for us, by coming out of their closets so to speak and becoming visible. I will forward you a list of all these organizations. As I say, I believe these groups are covering more and more of the country and are in contact with each other. No doubt it will not be long before they open an office in Washington. That would be most helpful to us indeed. I plan to encourage this with a grant or two.

  I wanted to discuss all this with Slyme, but it appears that he’s been fired. Gobbel and Bohunk now jump to Purpura’s desires.

  Regarding Botts’s earlier original suggestion of “neighborhooding” our efforts, I think that’s what we’re putting into motion. Our continuing “targeted” outreach to their organizations is our most effective tool for obtaining the mos
t accurate data. We have already had on-site visits to specific enclaves of homosexuals, such as Greenwich Village in New York and the Castro neighborhood in San Francisco. COD’s Dr. Gibbard has sent in full reports on his interviews with many victims in both of these places. What is particularly fascinating is how many men are so desperate to participate in the activities “our government” is planning, which Gibbard sketched in for them (more or less), including our taking a census of them, their symptoms, their partners, their sexual activities, all, of course, on the premise that knowledge is power and will lead to helping them. Gibbard assures me that it went down well. “There is absolutely no sense among them that such a census could in any way be harmful to them.” I think he is overoptimistic in this assumption, but our overcoming any resistance will be a key to our success.

  We have just received a fuller report from our agents in San Francisco. The amount of data they have already collected in such a short period is spectacular. God bless the new models of handheld IBM Hollerith computers. Old Thomas Watson, who ran IBM, totally screwed Herman Hollerith out of a fortune. I was there and thank God I bought a lot of stock. Watson screwed a lot of people out of a lot of fortunes. But that is another story from our earlier history. All IBM files on this part of their history were long ago embargoed from view.

  Our office has already cross-referenced some seventy-six thousand cases. Yes, seventy-six thousand more names and addresses. Yes, this figure is light-years ahead of the paltry number COD is putting out. (I don’t know what the problem is with those guys. Perhaps you can look into this.) But far, far less than the Germans were able to calculate with their IBM Hollerith machines by 1938, when Himmler claimed there were one million four hundred thousand homosexuals in his country. We should have a hundred thousand by next month.

  Gobbel and Moose are tickled pink that things are going along so well and we are moving into higher gear.

  In closing, your suggestion of bonuses for our staff to insure fidelity to our work has been approved in the amounts you laid out for us at our last meeting.

  I hope you are as overcome as I am with the goodness of our hopes and goals and deeds. After a very long life of searching for a life of meaning, I have finally found it.

  By the way, I love the new name they’ve given us. The Tricia Institute. So, I gather, does the First Lady.

  HERMIA

  I have received a last note from our beloved Dr. Sister Grace. It is mangled and ripped and shredded and postmarked like it, too, has been through the wars.

  “Is it worth all the energy it’s going to take to make any of this clear to the putrid male-dominated world that will decide my fate? I am genuinely tired. Must I wait for Schwitz to blacken my name for all of medical history?”

  * * *

  The one-armed lady from Africa is dead! Thank you to your Jesus.

  TO FRED FROM HIS FRIEND ROBERT COUTOURIER

  You have to read the adventures of Gilgamesh and Enkidu. Both were mythical heroes of the Sumerian civilization, the first culture to invent writing, accounting, the hoe, pottery, etc., and our direct ancestors, since Abraham was from Haran, one of the Sumerian towns. Anyway, these two heroes had an obvious homosexual relationship, and when Enkidu died Gilgamesh said the most tender and moving words. All that more than five thousand years ago!

  I was thinking about the whole Sumerian thing and the story of Sodom and Gomorrah. What God was against was not sodomy but inhospitality; you don’t go rape some total strangers asking for your hospitality. It’s not the sexual act itself God opposes, just the violence. That fit better with the times, four thousand years ago when love as shown in all works of art did not distinguish among men to men, men to women, or women to women, but just the act of love. So much more sensible, no?

  I am in Kazakhstan, or is it Uzbekistan? It’s very dark and scary. My client is a Russian Jew who is so frightened of being murdered now that he’s exceptionally rich that he’s guarded every moment of his life. And I as his potential decorator am as well. He has an enormous plot of earth on the edge of the Caspian Sea. It’s very ugly because it’s so flat, but he wants high walls around his house, so I guess it makes no difference. His guards all look like Mongols, dark-skinned and all in fur pelts and, I am certain, high on drugs. Some of their faces are splotched with UC, I am also certain. My “client” does not understand what I’m talking about. “All the young men have these spots now,” he said to me. “I thought it was some sort of fad from America.”

  Keep up the good work. Do not flag or falter!

  I DIDN’T KNOW HOW ELSE TO DO THIS

  RAYMOND LOPEZ, GMPA VOLUNTEER SUPERVISOR

  My stomach hurts so much that I don’t know what to do. My legs hurt so much, and my feet, that it’s hard to walk and to come to work. All my doctors say they don’t know what to do and I must learn to live with it and be grateful I’m still alive. I’m not very good anymore with “learning to live” with things. When I don’t feel well it makes me mean and rude and turns me into a person nobody likes and I don’t like. Gordy and Frank and Trevor all say the same. This is the worst pain we have ever had, from anything. Trevor is on so many painkillers that he can’t talk sense or walk upright. “I don’t know how to escape this pain except by killing myself,” he said. As our physical discomfort increases day by day, we sit around and discuss how we’d do it. Yesterday was worse than the day before and today is worse than yesterday, so our conversations about this subject have become increasingly intense. Drugs like marijuana and speed that I take to feel better don’t make me feel better. Tappy gave me some MDAF and I vomited all night. Heller James gave me some Hound’s Tooth and I vomited all another night. Everyone I know and half the volunteers I’m supposed to be in charge of are on something. I don’t hear from any of them that they’ve found a way to feel better. I am afraid now. I hadn’t been afraid before now. I am also afraid of killing myself. I make lists of possibilities. Jumping from high places. (This seems horrible, the wait between cause and effect.) Jumping in front of fast-moving vehicles. (This seems like it might be the fastest but I don’t want to kill the driver.) Taking poison. (This might take too long and I would change my mind the minute I did it.) I need something that works real fast. I don’t know how to buy a gun but that doesn’t seem to be an insurmountable possibility. Forgive me. Please tell Fred to murder the mayor and the president.

  * * *

  TOMMY: Fred, Raymond blew his brains out in his cubicle at the office. His blood and brains were all over everything. I had to find some cleaning service that deals with human poisons. It wasn’t easy. The only thing without blood on it was the letter above that he left with your name and mine on it. We closed the office down for a few days, of course. Bruce doesn’t want anyone to know about this. As if you could keep something like this a secret. Raymond was one of our very first full-time volunteers. He had a rich boyfriend, Hector, who had died.

  FROM THE BOOK OF THE DEAD

  Herbert Ruler, Norbert Haas, Rob Daniele, Andrew Weissman, Fergus Alcorn, Alan Weints, Terry Fulcrum, Daniele Torronella, Fill Schwarts, Abernought Ficks, O’Hern Philpotts, Trent Delwits, Butts Fassenden, Hal Adonowiller, Oscar Phail, Nils Swedenborg, Gus St. Alban, Ted Witt, Noel Fish, Tom Donatt, Nestor Alhambra, Irving Slough, Hubie Stint, O’Donahue Morrisey, Rich Alexander, Leonard Rappsteiner, Furden Blye, Nick Spadafury, Paulo Rudolpho, Gianni Starchi, Jude Wrenner, Neil Warrenburst, Richard Allan Notum, Whipp Thresher, Louie Westerngartner, Ahasuerus Farouker, Lester Vann, Tom Dorr, Grant Griller, Loyal Trow, Peril Fort, Sam Simmser, Sam O’Harris, Sam Natale, Adam Schwartzkopf, Bobby Bulew, Tersh Teller, Boy Tallahassee, Buntrum Salsy, Vic Burns, Michael Callen, Nirv Vatter, Nobby Franjuro, Al Hassen, Peter Verduro, Saul Pinner, Alexander Durant, Makos Georgos, Makos Allesandri, Nirvos Trotta, Dick Netesso, Philip Riddil, Norton Newsome, Oden Ushervov, Tim Tripplehorn, Arthur Andrew Talc, Talbot Fuchs, Render Mylo, Phelps Drunenberg, Roger Realston, Roger Van Dycken, Tiny Fewshis, Cordon Trumbull, Luke Newton, Samuel D. V. P. Granit
e IV, Luis Secundos, Bob Marshall, Tulsa, Babe Harley, Marshall Potash, Harry Wyanat, Tiger Vettle, Narwood Vane, Liam O’Malley, Aleichem Singer, Toots Beyzar, Al Hoydenberger, Ray Knight, Bobby Borley, Clay Esterhaus, Joe Pearl, Felix Turner …

  Felix Turner. Felix Turner. Felix Turner. I type the name and stare at it.

  * * *

  The numbers released are stupid. I personally have infected some half a million people in the last two months alone. Again I wonder what advantage anyone feels is received by such what you call lowballing.

  You do not know that in Uganda the people I am infecting lose so much weight they are said to be suffering from the “slim disease.” Isn’t that amusing?

  A NEW VOICE IS HEARD IN THE LAND

  Dear Mr. Lemish,

  I cannot tell you how gratified all Muslims and our comrades in arms are with the lack of success for your endeavors, now manifesting itself with increasing visibility. It is not often that our religious dictates reap such tangible support in the West.

  Equally pleasurable to us is the obvious tacit approval your own country displays as your labors lead to your much-deserved bad fortune.

  Muhammad blesses all these endeavors, most obviously, for no success comes without the blessings of Allah.

  It is now impossible to dispute this fact: even should some cure be found (we shall continue our attempts to see that this remains highly unlikely), entire unreplaceable generations are being destroyed. As with the Jews during the world’s recent holocaust of them, you and your people will not get back on your feet.