The Nurse's Secret

by Sue MacKay

  ‘Afraid so.’

  Take that however you wish.

  Surely he’d be going in search of someone else to dance with now? Hopefully not when she’d made up her mind to let loose a little—with him. Damn, but she was hopeless at this. Should she grab his hand tightly so he couldn’t get away? Yeah, right. Then he’d really be running. So what happened next? More dancing? A drink? Mix and mingle? Talk about being out of practice. ‘What are you known by?’

  ‘Noah.’

  Odd that they only exchanged first names, but it might be best. All fun, and no tomorrow. Who needed to get caught up in too much talk and a lot less fun? Not her, not tonight. Her pulse rate dipped. What if she wanted to see him again? Getting ahead of herself? Sure she was. Enjoying the moment, finding her feet in this dating game, and having some fun was the only way to go. She was fizzing on the inside as the beat in her wrists sped up again. Getting on with the dancing and fun and stop thinking beyond now took over.

  Stacey’s feet moved, her body swayed, and they were away, her hand in her partner’s as they swung their legs high, then he had her in his arms, tipping her back further than before, and she was raising her leg beyond high. Around them others were trying to do the same with mixed levels of success, and some on the sidelines were clapping. At them? Who knew? She wasn’t stopping to find out. This was amazing. She could do it all night. She grinned at her partner and continued dancing, rolling her hips and lifting her feet.

  When the band finally stopped for a break, Stacey’s lungs were working overtime, making her chest rise and fall rapidly. ‘I need a drink after that,’ she managed between sharp breaths. So much for dancing like a mad thing all night. She was whacked, and thrilled at letting go all the restraints she’d known for the past year. Why hadn’t she done this sooner?

  ‘What would you like?’ Noah asked, also gasping.

  ‘A mojito, please, Noah.’ It did make a difference, knowing his name. They were no longer complete strangers.

  ‘Come on, let’s get to the bar before I pass out from lack of liquid.’ He took her elbow and led her through the crowd as the DJ put on a song, this one a little quieter and slower. At the bar, he pulled out a stool and continued holding her elbow until she was seated.

  Once their drinks were in front of them Stacey thought everything would become awkward. They didn’t know each other. Forget awkward, she decided. ‘I haven’t had so much fun in a long time,’ she told him honestly.

  ‘I’d have thought you went dancing every Friday night the way you handled that.’

  ‘Been busy with other things,’ she said, adjusting the truth a little, then hurried to change the subject away from her. ‘What about you? Do a lot of nightclubbing?’

  ‘Can’t say I do. Like you, it’s finding the time.’

  ‘Which...’ She stopped. No, don’t spoil the night getting to know personal details. The anonymity of it all gave her the freedom of being herself, being able to dance and have a drink and not think about overstepping the mark. Of finding who she really was now she was unattached. There might be a totally different person lurking inside, a stronger, more entertaining woman—one who was thinking too much when she should be focusing on now.

  ‘No questions?’ he asked with a smile. ‘That’s a good idea. We’re having a great time with no comebacks. Shall we take our drinks out into the foyer? It might be a little cooler there. And quieter.’ He spoke close to her ear.

  She stifled a gasp as his breath grazed her skin, sending a ripple of heat to places that hadn’t been warm for a long time. When she nodded, he took her elbow to help her off the stool. Definitely a gentleman as well as a hunk. Would she bump into him around the hospital she worked at over the coming days? What would his reaction to her be then? Or hers to him in the light of day and work? There’d been no sign of him during the previous two weeks, or she’d passed him and not noticed his looks. Huh? How likely was that when they instantly turned her into a hot mess?

  Relax...go with the fun aspect. He’s not hurting you, quite the opposite.

  With her glass in one hand, she let him lead her out of the room. This was the way to having a great time.

  ‘Forget quieter.’ Stacey laughed, and she was doing a lot of that tonight. The band had come on again, now even louder, and more people were making their way out here. Sipping her drink, she looked around, a big smile on her face. What a night. She wanted to pinch herself.

  They stood in companionable silence, cooling down as their drinks disappeared—probably too quickly for someone out of practice, but, hey, she was getting back on her feet, right? Then Noah took her in his arms and began dancing around the edge of the foyer, easily avoiding those standing in groups, talking. As he reached a far corner he paused and gazed down into her eyes. Forget companionable. Butterflies flapped wildly in her stomach. Her skin heated.

  ‘Thank you for a wonderful evening.’

  Stacey blinked. ‘No, thank you.’ The heat in her body began dissipating. Was this the end? He’d go one way, she the other? She wasn’t ready to say goodnight.

  ‘Thank us. I was dragged here by a friend who I haven’t seen most of the night. I’d intended sneaking away early, then along came this amazing dancing lady.’

  Phew. That sounded positive, didn’t it? ‘Is that a chat-up line?’ she gasped, unable to believe she’d asked that.

  The corner of his mouth lifted as he smiled. ‘It wasn’t meant to be.’

  Damn. If ever the moment to continue moving on from the past was going to happen, surely this was it? Another deep breath. Give it a go. What was there to lose? ‘Do you think you could kiss me?’

  ‘Are you a mind reader?’ He bent his head and brushed his mouth across hers.

  ‘Absolutely.’ See? It wasn’t so difficult to take the enjoyment another step. She inhaled, smelt spice, and man. Oh, yes, man. This man. Hot, strong, pulse-racing scent. Her mouth opened under his, and somehow her breasts were up against his chest and her feet lifting onto their toes. And she was kissing him back. Kissing Noah, a man she’d only met hours ago. And loving it. Loving the sensations zapping through her body, touching her stomach, her toes, her breasts, her centre. All on a kiss.

  Splayed hands rested on her hips. Then that delicious mouth pulled back. Serious grey eyes filled with sparks of heat locked on her. Desire? For her? ‘Anastasia?’

  She nodded slowly. ‘Noah.’

  ‘I’ve got a room upstairs.’ He grimaced. ‘That sounds corny. But I’ve been here for three nights as I’ve packed up my house. I’m heading away tomorrow.’

  So she could continue to let her hair down, have that fun she craved, and go home knowing she wouldn’t bump into him at the hospital and be embarrassed if it didn’t work out. She slipped her hand into his before she could overthink what she was doing. To hell with the past and the future. She’d seize the moment and make the most of what was on offer. ‘Yes, please.’ Ouch. What did someone say in this situation? She’d never faced it before. How naïve could she be? It was definitely time to get out there and learn a thing or two.

  The lift was empty and seemed to fly to Noah’s floor. Within moments they were inside his room, kissing as though their lives depended on it. Hot strokes from his tongue turned her to jelly. Had her holding on to him tight, pressing her body to his. Made her crave to be taken. Here. Now. His hand slipped between them to cradle her breast, his finger tweaking the peak, sending bolts of desire slicing through her straight to her point of need. ‘Noah,’ she growled against his mouth.

  Lifting her into his arms, he carried her to the turned-down bed and laid her on it. He stood upright to pull his shirt over his head, exposing the broad, muscular chest she’d imagined. Then he was taking off his trousers. His erection burst free of his underwear and Stacey groaned with need. She wanted him, all the way, now.

  ‘Slowly,’ Noah murmured against her ear as he
lay down and reached for her, removing her clothes tantalisingly slowly. His hands were magic on her hot skin. His tongue a tease as he tasted her neck, shoulder, first one breast, then the other.

  She swallowed a scream, pushing her breasts up closer to that source of wonder. Her hands were working his backside, kneading and stroking, kneading, stroking. Then she reached for him, wrapped her fingers around his hot, throbbing need and rubbed him.

  ‘Anastasia. Wait.’ He groped in his trouser pocket, removed his wallet and tugged out a condom packet.

  Anastasia. It was like another version of herself. A version who wasn’t waiting for her past to catch up and move forward, a version who was moving ahead, making the most of what she had and not wishing for what was gone. Touching Noah, his back, those chest muscles rippling under her fingertips, his flat stomach, and beyond.

  Then he was above her, touching, bringing her to a climax like no other, and she was bucking under him. Taking him in and losing herself in a wave of desire and longing and heat.

  As he joined her in their release she had one sane thought. I’ve done it. I’m free.

  When the alarm went off at five thirty in the morning she slipped out of bed before Noah had opened his eyes and ducked into the bathroom for a quick shower. At some stage during the night he’d mentioned having to leave for the airport by six, and she didn’t want to hang around, dragging out the last moments with this amazing man.

  Dressed, feeling a sight without make-up, she headed through the room to the door, where she paused for one more look at the man who’d given her so much without realising it. ‘Noah? Thank you.’

  He turned from digging clothes out of his case. ‘Whatever for?’

  ‘Helping me get on with my life.’

  ‘You’re welcome.’ His smile was a gem, and one she’d take with her throughout whatever lay ahead.

  CHAPTER ONE

  Three years later...

  ‘WELCOME BACK TO the madhouse,’ Liz said as Stacey Wainwright stepped into the nurses’ office on the surgical ward where she was head nurse.

  ‘Thanks for nothing.’ It had been hard, packing her lunch and heading out the door, leaving her daughter behind with Dad after two weeks spending time being with Holly, playing, walking in the park, reading stories. ‘I’ll get over it,’ she told the other nurse.

  ‘And that’s not this job you’re talking about,’ Liz answered with sympathy in her eyes. ‘I don’t know how you do it.’

  Neither did Stacey sometimes. If it weren’t for her parents, especially her father, being the daytime carers she’d probably have found some other way to stay solvent and be with Holly, but it wouldn’t have been easy. ‘I manage. So does Holly. She adores her granddad.’

  ‘Who spoils her rotten.’

  ‘Funny, that. He never spoilt me or Toby.’ Her brother took pleasure in teasing Holly about that, even when she was too young to understand.

  ‘Grandparents’ rights, eh?’ Liz tapped the computer screen. ‘Let’s get this done so I can go get some breakfast before sleeping the day away. It was hectic in here last night. Two new admissions, both with post-trauma surgery after a multiple pile-up in the Rotherhithe Tunnel. I’ve got individual care on each, but they shouldn’t deteriorate unless the unexpected happens, which we know often does.’

  Liz continued going through the patient list. ‘This one.’ She pointed to the last name on the list. ‘Jonathon Black. Keep an eye on him. He had his pancreas removed thirty-six hours ago because of cancer. Early this morning he complained of increased pain and his temperature’s spiking. Joel upped his antibiotics in case there’s an infection developing.’

  Stacey studied the notes on the screen. ‘Joel wasn’t too concerned?’ If the duty registrar was okay with these results then so should she be, yet unease was rising, and she knew not to ignore that.

  ‘He suggested a CBC, but I haven’t had time to take blood.’

  ‘I’ll see to it.’ Nothing like a normal white-cell count to counteract the sense of an out-of-control infection coming into play. ‘Anything else I need to know? Apart from who’s getting married, divorced, having another baby?’ She grinned. She’d missed everyone while she’d been away. They were a tight-knit group on the ward, and outside work.

  ‘Come on. We were expecting you to come back with some gossip about what you’ve been up to and who you’ve been seeing.’

  ‘Get out of here. I’m going to see Mr Black.’

  I’m not telling you about the guy I went on a date with.

  There’d be no end to the quizzing. Anyway, while she liked Matthew she wasn’t overly enamoured and wouldn’t be following up. The few times she’d dated over the years since that night with Noah in an effort to keep moving on had only made her regret more than ever not getting his contact details.

  Not only because of Holly either, but because there was no denying the intense longing to see him again she couldn’t douse no matter how hard she tried. He’d got to her in unexpected ways, like being kind and gentle, exciting and sexy. Of course there was a lot to learn about him, and she wanted to more than she could believe, even after all this time.

  That one night when she’d danced like she’d never quite done before, or since, had totally distracted her from the past and made her happy beyond belief. It had been out of this world, as had the man she’d danced and made love with.

  Talk about a life-changer. Holly was the result, and she wouldn’t alter a thing, other than find the man and tell him he was a father. So far, her endless search had come up blank. It was hard with only a first name to go on. The world was full of Noahs, apparently. He’d got away and her disappointment was huge. There’d been a connection she’d not expected, and she wanted to follow up. Sigh.

  ‘Hey, Stacey?’ Liz called. ‘There’s a new surgeon on the ward. He started a week ago, so I haven’t met him since I’ve been on nights and he hasn’t been called in. He’s Jonathon Black’s surgeon. Mr Kennedy. Quite something, apparently. And I’m not talking about him as a surgeon.’ She grinned.

  Stacey waved a hand over her shoulder. ‘Thanks, Liz. I’ll give him your phone number when I see him.’ A laugh followed her down the ward as she went to see Mr Black.

  She’d meet the surgeon soon enough. In the meantime she had a job to do. ‘Hello, Jonathon. I’m Stacey Wainwright, the head nurse on this ward. I’ve just returned from leave and have been getting up to speed with your details.’

  ‘I heard you were due back today.’ His face was red and puffy around eyes filled with pain.

  Stepping across to read the monitor showing his BP, heart rhythm and temperature, she said, ‘I hear you’re uncomfortable and that your temperature has risen. What about pain in the region of your surgery? Has that quietened down since the op?’ Despite the notes on the computer, she liked to ask patients about their symptoms, in case any details were left out.

  ‘It’s hurting more than ever. The pills I’ve been given haven’t helped.’

  ‘Do you mind showing me where this pain is exactly?’ Stacey lifted the sheet to pull up the hospital gown he still wore for ease of access and keeping pressure off the wound a pyjama bottoms waistband might cause.

  ‘All around here.’ Without touching his abdomen, he indicated an area forward of where his pancreas would’ve been situated.

  ‘Not up here?’ She lightly touched the surgical wound.

  ‘That hurts, but the deep pain is away from there.’

  Add in the thirty-eight-point-five-degree temperature, the deep red shade in his face and upper body, and there was definitely something more than an infection of the internal wound going on. Or so her gut told her. ‘I’m going to take a blood sample and send it to the lab. Then I’ll call your surgeon and inform him what’s going on.’ She’d also put Jonathon’s breakfast on hold for now. If he had to go back to Theatre he didn’t need food in his bel
ly. ‘We’ll get this sorted for you.’

  ‘Thank you, Nurse. I am worried that something else is happening.’

  ‘Try to relax. I know, easily said. Please don’t accept food or anything to drink.’

  He nodded. ‘I understand.’

  ‘Show me again where it hurts the most.’ When he indicated the same spot, where the appendix was, she asked, ‘On a score of one to ten, ten being the highest, what would you say the pain is?’

  ‘Eight.’

  ‘Right. I’ll get the blood-test kit.’ On the way she stopped at the office and asked for Mr Kennedy’s speed-dial number. She had a sinking feeling that whatever was causing Jonathon’s distress was rapidly becoming urgent.

  ‘Mr Kennedy.’

  Her brow furrowed at the sudden voice on the other end of the line. Shaking away an odd sensation she couldn’t explain, she said briskly, ‘I’m Stacey Wainwright, head nurse on Surgical. I think you need to see Jonathon Black. He has severe pain and an increased temperature. I’m about to take an EDTA specimen.’ She filled in the details.

  ‘It’s likely an infection of the wound, possibly internal. I’ll be up in a few minutes.’

  ‘Thank you. I have a feeling it’s something else. Appendicitis, even peritonitis.’

  ‘I’ll investigate all possibilities when I get there.’ The phone went dead.

  Fair enough. He was the doctor. She the nurse. In the past she’d met doctors who put nurses down, but she’d never been able to keep her thoughts to herself when she believed there was something happening with a patient that hadn’t been considered. He hadn’t had time to consider anything, hadn’t observed his patient this morning, and she was about to meet him. She hoped Mr Kennedy wasn’t going to be the kind of doctor to give a rebuke for putting her opinion out there.

  She shivered. That sense she’d missed something when he’d first answered her call returned. Like she knew him, but as far as she could recall she hadn’t worked with any doctor of that name. Guess she’d know soon enough.