BLOODBURG

by Nyssa Renay

  “Rosabelle’s Diner,” Joseph answered, chuckling. “You know, I can’t believe the owner of this place named it after the pet cow she had as a kid. At least she made the right choice to leave the dull and lifeless prairie to move to the big city.” He shook his head. “You talk about things happening for a reason. Her family’s farm was completely devastated by a tornado only two weeks after she lef—”

  “Is this some sort of joke to you?” Allie growled.

  Joseph’s expression quickly turned cold as he leaned back, staring at her through his purple-tinted glasses. “No, it’s actually a lot more serious than you think. I was just trying to lighten the mood.”

  “Lighten the mood?” Allie’s eyes went wide. “I’m terrified right now. How can you not see that?”

  “You’re safe, Allison…I promise,” Joseph offered.

  “Am I?” Allie said dismissively. “How the hell am I supposed to feel safe when you abduct me and take me someplace while I’m still unconscious?”

  “Well, I couldn’t just leave you there, passed out on a park bench.”

  “Yes! Yes, you could have,” Allie snapped. “The normal thing to do is call the police…or call an ambulance when you see a random person dive out of a cab and puke their brains out before blacking out on a park bench. You don’t kidnap them and take them out to breakfast!”

  Joseph sighed. “You’re right, but I was hungry and figured we need to have a talk in private.”

  Allie stared blankly at Joseph. “Private,” she replied sarcastically. “How is this private? There are like twenty people in here.”

  “Oh, they don’t even know we’re here,” Joseph explained, picking up a menu. “We’ve actually been sitting here for over half an hour now, and not one waitress has even stopped by.” Joseph lowered the menu, slightly peering over the top of it. “Besides, if I took you somewhere truly private, you’d be even more panicked than you are now. I figured you’d feel safer being surrounded by people…and we could talk.”

  Allie felt a little better, hearing that Joseph had considered her feelings before bringing her to the diner. She knew that if Joseph had wanted to hurt her, he wouldn’t have saved her life twice already. Allie took a deep breath and tried to relax.

  “Now,” Joseph began, dropping the menu on the table. “I’m sure you have many questions about how it’s possible for me to do the things you’ve seen me do, but let’s just start with the obvious: you don’t believe that no one here can see us. I want you to stand up and walk to the counter and grab one of those salt shakers for me.”

  “Why the salt shaker?” Allie asked nervously.

  “Because we don’t have one,” Joseph said with a sly smile. “Take your time.”

  Allie slowly slid across the seat and made her way out of the booth, taking a deep breath as she stood up. As she took her first step, a waitress carrying a large tray of plates almost ran right into her.

  “Oh! Sorry, hon, didn’t see you there,” the waitress apologized as she steadied the tray.

  Allie opened her mouth to apologize, but the woman had already made it halfway across the room before she could say anything.

  “Excuse me,” Allie said approaching the counter and politely tapping a man on the shoulder. “Could you pass me a salt shaker?”

  “Sure,” he put his fork down on his plate and grabbed one. “Here you go.”

  “Thank you.”

  “No problem,” the man said, turning his attention back to his plate.

  For a moment, Allie felt like herself again, but the moment she turned around, all the strange and unexplainable things from the past few days came flooding back to her.

  She looked over at the booth where she’d been sitting. The table was covered in dirty dishes and empty mugs of coffee, and Joseph was gone. Allie frantically scanned the diner for him.

  “I’m still here, Allie,” Joseph’s disembodied voice floated from the empty booth. “Come sit down.”

  She took a few cautious steps toward the table and watched as the dirty dishes and clutter slowly faded away, revealing Joseph sitting there and the table perfectly clean.

  “How? How did you do that?” Allie asked in amazement as she sat down in the booth, placing the salt shaker on the table.

  Joseph smiled. “One thing at a time,” he replied, raising his hand to catch the attention of one of the waitresses. “Let’s eat first…then we’ll talk.”

  “Hey, Joseph!” the older waitress said, playfully slapping his shoulder. “Trying to sneak in here without me seeing you? Huh?”

  “Of course not, Minny.” Joseph grabbed her hand, softly rubbing the top of it with his thumb. “You know none of these other girls can give the level of service you provide me when I come here. No one compares to you.”

  Minny blushed slightly, but her friendly exterior became cold when she turned to Allie. “Who’s your friend?”

  “This is my niece, Allie,” Joseph offered. “She’s visiting from the Midwest. Wanted to see the bright lights of the big city and all that.”

  Allie nodded, forcing a small smile.

  “Bloodburg?” Minny scoffed. “Honey, this city’s a dump.”

  Allie was a bit offended; she was a lifelong resident of Bloodburg. Yes, it had its slums and bad areas, but it was still home to her. “It doesn’t seem so bad to me,” Allie offered dismissively.

  Minny forced a smile before turning back to Joseph. “Just don’t let her go sightseeing on her own at night, okay? Pretty little thing like that won’t make it home alive. Anyway, I’ll get you two some coffee while you look over the menu,” she said, winking at Joseph.

  “Your niece?” Allie whispered loudly.

  “Sure, why not?” Joseph smirked. “Don’t want her to get jealous. She might spit in your food.”

  Allie’s stomach lurched and she was grateful it was empty. “You do know I’ve been in here before, right? If she remembers me, you might get something special in your food, too.”

  “She won’t remember you,” Joseph said confidently, picking up the menu and reading it over. “I’ve already blocked her mind of all memories of you being here before she even looked at you.”

  “But…” Allie trailed off, suddenly remembering Joseph rubbing his thumb on her hand.

  “Good. You catch on quickly,” Joseph complimented. “That’ll make this conversation go so much easier.”

  All Allie could do was smile and try to accept that Joseph was always going to be two steps ahead of her.

  “I think I’m going to have a bowl of Rice Krunchees,” Joseph announced. “I just love those delicious little bastards.”

  -7-

  Minny quickly returned to the table, dropping off a newspaper for Joseph and jotting down their orders on a small pad of paper. After a few flirtatious moments, Minny scurried away. Allie felt a little awkward and uncomfortable as she sat there, waiting patiently for Joseph to say something to her, but he just sat in silence, reading his paper without ever looking up at her.

  Joseph’s rude behavior was starting to annoy Allie, especially because he continued to read while he ate. She couldn’t understand why he’d brought her all the way here if he was just going to ignore her like this.

  Allie glared angrily at the back of the newspaper while she picked at the food on her plate. But after a few more minutes of Joseph’s anti-social behavior, Allie simply gave up and occupied herself by retracing the events of the past few days. Everything involving Joseph; the abduction in the alley; the robbery at the bank; even getting sick at the park when her brain felt like it was on fire…none of it seemed remotely possible.

  After a good ten minutes of mulling over her thoughts, Allie figured she might as well finish her breakfast before it got cold. It wasn’t until she’d eaten the last bite of her pancakes and sausage that Joseph finally spoke to her.

  “By now…” he paused, folding his newspaper up before tossing it onto the table, “…you’re
trying to process what you’ve seen.” Joseph smiled, tilting his head slightly.

  “Yes,” Allie admitted, feeling defeated.

  “I can tell you’re the type of person who believes if you don’t witness something first-hand, then there’s no real proof that it can exist. Am I right?”

  “You say that like it’s a bad thing,” she replied coldly.

  “You’re a skeptic!” Joseph laughed. “It’s quite all right. I am, too.”

  “Says the man who turned a dead…” Allie trailed off as she looked around to see if anyone was listening.

  “Don’t worry; they can’t hear you.” Joseph smirked.

  “…turned a dead body into dust right in front of me,” Allie scoffed. “Sorry, but it’s still a little hard for me to wrap my head around that one.

  “Don’t you see? That’s good. You’re willing to test the limits of your own reality.” Joseph smiled, leaning back. “I’ve always felt that having a strong conviction about what you truly believe in, yet still maintaining an open mind is the key to keep from becoming another brainwashed idiot who preaches their warped vision of how everyone else needs to think.”

  “But how am I supposed to accept something that I know shouldn’t be possible?”

  “You just have to open your mind. Trust what your own eyes are showing you…and then believe it.”

  Allie sighed. “Yeah, well I saw Santa Claus at the mall when I was a kid. I thought he was real, too.”

  “He was,” Joseph replied seriously. “Just not the way he’s portrayed now.” A loud chuckle erupted from him. “Oh, that man was one of the best burglars of his time—”

  “Wait,” Allie interrupted. “You’re trying to tell me that Santa Claus was not only real, but he was a criminal?”

  “Yes, but this variation of the legend lived a few hundred years before you were born. He started out as a monk, but quickly became a disgruntled vigilante. He was excommunicated from the church for questioning what he believed to be unfair practices against the poor.” Joseph scratched the side of his head. “Friar Nicholas Caridad…yes…that was it…he was ironically named after the third century saint. I do know he only stole from the rich because he felt it was the best way to make a statement about inequality.”

  Joseph leaned forward, grinning. “Nicholas used to break into wealthy homes all over the city, repeatedly hitting each one and only taking enough to cause a few minor financial inconveniences.” He let out a small sentimental laugh. “Those wealthy bastards contacted the authorities over and over, insisting they do something about the robberies. The problem was that most of the items reported stolen were nothing more than showy trinkets…frivolous toys to the rich…things the working class could never afford! It was as if the wealthy were only raising the issue to flaunt how much they truly had. And after a while, the police stopped responding all together and sided with Nicholas, which meant most of his crimes went completely unrecorded. It was actually quite brilliant, if you think about it.”

  “You’re serious?” Allie asked, wondering if Joseph was not only dangerous, but delusional as well.

  “Of course,” Joseph acknowledged. “Nicholas only kept enough for food and a roof over his head. The rest, he gave to the poor by sneaking into their homes and leaving a bit of money for the parents and a few toys for each of the kids.” Joseph laughed. “I have to say…leaving the toys was one of the strangest calling cards I’d ever heard of, but it worked. Poor families all over the city woke up, anxious to see if good ol’ Saint Nicholas had stopped by and left anything.”

  “I’ve never heard of anything like that before,” she muttered in a tone of disbelief.

  “You wouldn’t have.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “Within a few years, good ol’ Saint Nick’s reputation became legendary, eventually beginning what became known as the Cult of Saint Nicholas. It was really no more than a bunch of copycat criminals all across the world. The poor and destitute had found an icon to emulate. The cult members even dressed just like Nicholas, making it seem like he was everywhere at once. But after a while, the authorities had enough.” Joseph sighed. “Eventually, the real Nicholas Caridad was apprehended. Word spread about his capture, and within a few months, the copycat robberies stopped. To prevent this from ever happening again, those in power decided to reinvent the character you now know as Santa Claus by situating him into a key secular holiday. It took a while for this new tradition to catch on, but after a few decades of pounding the concept into the minds of children, it eventually stuck…I think they even hired an author to write a book about it or something.”

  Allie just stared blankly at Joseph. Even though his story seemed completely ridiculous, it still made sense somehow, but she couldn’t tell if he was lying. “Why should I believe anything you say?” she asked.

  “I can assure you, everything I’m telling you is true.”

  “How do I know for sure?”

  “You don’t.” Joseph grinned slyly. “But part of you wants to believe there is more out there than what you’ve been told…no matter how skeptical you are.”

  Allie sighed heavily, wondering how to ask the one question she knew would sound completely absurd, but it was the only logical explanation for everything she’d seen Joseph do. “Are you…human?” she asked, feeling ridiculous for even saying it out loud.

  Joseph slowly pulled off his glasses, and Allie watched as his brown eyes morphed into something like she’d only seen in science fiction movies. Joseph’s irises turned solid black and the whites of his eyes, a dark shade of purple.

  Allie’s body tensed as the realization sunk in.

  “What do you think?” Joseph asked, amused by Allie’s nervous reaction.

  She took a deep breath. “Well, I wanted to know the truth,” she said uneasily, forcing herself to remain calm. “Now I do.”

  “Good.” Joseph leaned back, putting his glasses back on. “Now we can get down to business.”

  “What business?” she asked.

  “The reason why you’re here.” Joseph took a deep breath. “More specifically, why you’re still alive.”

  “Wait! Were you going to kill me, just because I could remember you?”

  “It was one option…yes,” Joseph said coldly.

  “Then, why didn’t you?” Allie spat. “Oh, now I get it…I’m only alive because you need something from me.”

  “Precisely!” Joseph smiled. “You see? I knew you’d catch on quickly.”

  “Wow,” Allie replied, frustrated. “First, you threaten me, and now you’re complimenting me. What’s next?”

  “The truth,” Joseph said. “That is what you want, isn’t it?”

  “Yes,” Allie replied, pushing back. “So…why do you still need me alive?”

  “You know, I’ve been hiding out on this miserable little planet for over four hundred years, and no one has ever been able to remember me after I’ve blocked the memories.”

  “I guess I’m just that good.”

  “No, you’re not.” Joseph sighed. “You just got lucky. You managed to cover yourself with just the right combination of gemstones to interfere with my spells. That’s all.”

  “You mean…all this?” Allie asked, flashing her ring and jingling her charm bracelets before pulling out a crystal necklace from underneath her shirt collar. “Don’t tell me you believe in this stuff, too?”

  “Yes, don’t you?”

  “No. I’m a skeptic, remember?”

  “Then why wear it?” he asked.

  “Because I work at a small shop that sells this crap,” Allie replied, not wanting to mention her sister to this dark and unusual man. “It’s just marketing for my boss.”

  “You’re not a very good liar, Allison,” Joseph grumbled. “Trust me. I know all about Patience and the store. The damn place gave me such a headache when I followed you to work the day after your incident in the alley.”

  “
You followed me to work?” Allie snapped.

  “Yes,” Joseph replied coldly. “I’ve been keeping tabs on you for the past few days. I had to make sure you weren’t a threat.”

  “A threat?” Allie asked, confused. “You can make people shoot themselves when they’re trying to shoot you. I watched you turn a dead man into dust. Why the hell would you think I was a threat to you?”

  “When you’ve been hunted for as long as I have been, you learn nothing is ever what it seems. I’ve managed to survive this long only by staying hidden and not drawing attention to myself.”

  “That’s a miserable way to live. Why are you being hunted in the first place?” Allie suddenly understood his paranoia and the need for this level of secrecy, but she couldn’t understand why someone like him would have anything to worry about.

  “I was biologically engineered to be the ultimate weapon…the perfect assassin. Actually, there were thirty of us. We were created to fight in a war that my people realistically had no chance of ever winning, but we did. Somehow, everything fell into place and we won.”

  “Isn’t that a good thing?”

  Joseph tilted his head slightly. “Let’s say you had the most dangerous and deadly gun in the world, able to stop any threat that might harm you. What happens when all crime has been extinguished from society?”

  “I’d just get rid of the gun, I guess.”

  “How?” he asked coldly. “What if there was a risk of the gun falling into the wrong hands?”

  “Well, to be perfectly safe, I guess I’d just have it…destroyed.” Allie suddenly realized what he was getting at. “But you’re a person, not a thing.”

  “To my people, the gun and I are one in the same.”

  “And there’s no way you could plead your situation with your people?” Allie argued.

  “No,” Joseph said somberly. “We tried, but they quickly tracked down and killed everyone but me. I only managed to escape when I found a hole in the edge of my universe that led me into yours. But, unfortunately, that didn’t stop a bounty from being put on my head after I’d arrived.”