Through My Rhymes - Volume 1

by Jesse Chamberlain

world seems over,

  Just take a look over your shoulder,

  Someone might just want to hold ya,

  Let you know it's never going to be over.

  Never Kissed The Sky

  No words can express my deepest regrets,

  No memories can replace the ones I forget,

  Nobody can replace the friends I've lost,

  All my tears can't repay the cost.

  Every step I've taken hurts my feet,

  Can't recall when I've had rosy cheeks,

  Every inch of my body just seems to ache,

  All the years that I just seem to take.

  Nobody has taken from me what I can't get back,

  Nobody has caught me when I've fallen off track,

  I look at people, who think I'm just full of crap,

  I can't be forgiven, I just ask that you listen.

  Every day, a little bit of good in me dies,

  I shed a tear but never manage to cry,

  I've kissed many angels but never experienced the high,

  I've never kissed the sky.

  Every angel has flown away, beyond my grasp,

  Every prayer I wished they'd carry on their wings,

  I never get an answer to what I ask, I just cry,

  One of these days I'll feel the high of kissing the sky.

  It's Not My Fault (She Died)

  She'd always put her faith in me,

  She was always there,

  Then she fell in love with another,

  Then whatever I said, she didn't care.

  So I started talking to her sister,

  Got closer and so I didn't miss her,

  I felt closer and spent time with her family,

  Even though she didn't give a damn about me.

  Then her boyfriend hit her and she calls,

  Teary eyed and I wasn't at home to answer,

  Distraught she leaves message after message,

  Crying and broken-hearted she jumps in her lancer.

  Takes off and makes call after call,

  Every message she left had her crying that I'd answer,

  Then she dropped her phone and crashed into a pole,

  But in a flash she sees everything that she remembers.

  I'm sitting in my room saying it’s not my fault she died,

  I'm sitting in my room where we spoke and I tried,

  To tell her how her boyfriend was bad but you say I lied,

  I'm sitting in my room saying it’s not my fault she died.

  Miss You (I'm Not Alone)

  You never quite miss it enough till it leaves your palm,

  Reminisce on all the times they made you warm,

  Whenever you were stressing they'd always keep you calm,

  Tell you off for swearing, so you'd try to say darn.

  Not a day goes by that I don't miss what I've lost,

  So much given and taken away, so we all pay a cost,

  I really wish I'd taken more time or put more in,

  So much to say but lost for words, I just don't know how to begin.

  Somehow you'd help turn the darkest days bright,

  Bring light to my life when I thought there was only the night,

  Helped me settle down and remember the right ways,

  Always keep my head up and that'll bring better days.

  I keep my head up trying to remember you always knew best,

  Where ever I went wrong you'd tell me there's no need to stress,

  I must confess that I miss you more than ever when I'm alone,

  But I smile because even though you aren't here you said I wouldn't be alone.

  Homeless

  I sometimes wonder if they think I'm a statue,

  Sitting here with a sign and a box looking at you,

  People walk past never offering a bless you when I achoo,

  Know they hate but respect me for doing what I have to, to get through.

  The sign changes from time to time and I scrap up a buck,

  Scurry through the trash before the truck pulls up,

  Steal from overfilled donation bins but never from stores,

  Always shirts and pants, what I wouldn't give for a clean pair of draws.

  Remember my mistakes and have developed a friend,

  Talking to myself seems strange, I'd stop if you spared change,

  Same faces over and over again from 8 to 5,

  Know they hate but respect me for doing what I have to, to survive.

  I'm homeless but not soul-less so spare some change,

  Lend a hand and even a thought because I'm human to,

  Sorry that it can be strange that I talk to myself,

  So pull up a chair and a drink, let's share a story or two.

  Silhouette

  Sitting alone in my room staring at the ceiling,

  You are not around and I get a lonely feeling,

  Wondering and wondering, my heart still reeling,

  But every day I can feel the pain is healing.

  Sitting in the dark letting my mind run free,

  All of these feelings keep overflowing in me,

  I keep my eyes closed wondering what to do,

  Just looking for a little light to shine through.

  So I light up a candle and watch it dance on the walls,

  The way it shimmers and stops, rises and falls,

  My mind starts reminiscing on times not to forget,

  That’s when I believe I see your silhouette.

  My mind reminiscing on times, I hope I never forget,

  Dancing on my walls, I see your silhouette,

  Reminiscing on times, I hope I never forget,

  Watching you & seeing your shadow silhouette.

  Every time should of been a time, never to forget,

  But all I remember are the candles and your silhouette,

  The love in the air that we both had shared,

  Lying here, losing it was something I was not prepared.

  Windshield Washer

  Tapping on the windshield,

  Trying to make a cent,

  Reaching in my pockets,

  Still nothing but lint.

  Leaning on the traffic post,

  They make me feel like a ghost,

  Stomach telling me it’s hungry,

  Could do with a slice of toast.

  Sun beating down,

  I'm starting to burn,

  Wish I could afford sunscreen,

  Another lesson learned.

  Still tapping on your windshield,

  Trying to make a buck,

  Trying to make an honest living,

  Not having any luck.

  Could do with an indoor job,

  If I didn't smell so bad,

  Hasn't rained in weeks,

  Making the farmers mad.

  Just keep kicking on the bucket,

  Mad when motorists turn me down,

  Only $10 dollars today,

  $5 I found on the ground.

  Still tapping on your windshield,

  Trying to make a buck,

  Trying to make an honest living,

  Not having any luck.

  Echoes

  I hear my love echoing like yelling down a hall,

  Yelling in a canyon, listening to it bounce off the walls,

  Waiting for it to catch an ear and find me standing here,

  Knowing I'll love them for the rest of our years.

  Knowing through it all I want to hear their hopes and fears,

  Even if they lose their way, I'll take the wheel and steer,

  Build a life together even if we don't know where to go from here,

  But taking my hand and looking in my eye, love always remains clear.

  But the walls continue to echo with no end in sight,

  Perhaps I need a new approach with smoke signals or a kite,

  A message in a bottle or send my love on a paper airplane,

  Hoping that when i
t lands in your hands that you feel the same.

  S.L.U.T.S

  (She Live Under The Sheets)

  The stars are out and the planet’s aligned,

  Mixed with just the right amount of wine,

  Sitting down across from me I decide to say 'hi',

  But she’s looking away and doesn’t bat an eye.

  Waiting for a moment till I see a tear on her cheek,

  I then move closer, thinking we should meet,

  Trying to be sweet and ask, ‘Why the tear?’

  She looked at me and all I could see was fear.

  She seems to take a moment, grasp her composure,

  I apologise but saw her tear and thought I should come over,

  Let her know I have an ear and a shoulder too,

  She can tell me everything but know she doesn’t have to.

  She tells me she hates her life but needs money to live,

  She even takes a breath and tells me she aborted a kid,

  Tells me I wouldn’t believe half the stuff she did,

  And has given up, believing that’s just how life is.

  I can hear it in the way she speaks, telling me,

  She live under the sheets,

  She was so sweet now feels life is all to bleak,

  So now she lives under the sheets.

  She’s never told her family,

  She even changed her name,

  She tried to make it all on her own,

  But only feels that it’s herself to blame.

  I hear her voice and feel her pain,

  I listen to her story and listen to her strain,

  Holding back the tears with a quiver in her voice,

  God knows she did what she had too and made the choice.

  Waking up at night, dreaming she’s screaming in her sleep,

  Sweating in her sheets with a rapid heartbeat,

  Make up every day to cover the bruises on her cheek,

  But every time she looks in the mirror, she hates when her eyes meet.

  Resting her head on my shoulder, I hold her tight,

  I think that this moment has changed my life,

  Opening my eyes to what some people give to live,

  But respect her out here trying while others would’ve hid.

  I can hear it in the way she speaks, telling me,

  She live under the sheets,

  She’s waiting for Prince Charming to sweep her off her feet,

  But for now she lives under the sheets.

  Feeling so honoured to hear her whole story,

  I know one day that she’ll reach her glory,

  I know she’s still climbing and will reach her peak,

  But for now she lives under the sheets.

  Falling

  Falling in my dream without a parachute,

  Past visions of times, good, bad & cute,

  To the hardest, giving my father's grave a salute,

  Searching for me like trying to find the route.

  Air running past me like a leaf in the wind,

  Trying to fly but the chances are slim,

  Close my eyes and begin to pray,

  That someone will catch me one day.

  Light all around me but I see the stars in the sky,

  I see every one like they were shimmering in your eye,

  Can you see me from where ever you are?

  Do you feel the need to have me near, no matter how far?

  The ground's getting closer but I'm still amongst the clouds,

  Even if you hate me, I still want to make you proud,

  Please forgive me for never saying it out loud,

  But I guess when you're falling, it's too late now.

  In the Gutter Again

  I've been sitting in the gutter,

  Been sitting here so long,

  Seasons pass around me,

  Don't know where the time has gone.

  I keep feeling the tears roll down,

  My acne scarred face,

  No matter where I go from here,

  I see you every place.

  I even sit here on rainy days,

  Watch the water build into a stream,

  Confusing rain drops and tears,

  Slowly believing happiness is a dream.

  I wish you could see through my eyes,

  I wish my dreams were reality,

  Everybody cries when somebody dies,

  When I die, I only want heaven to cry for me.

  Why Did I Let You Go?

  Why did I let you go?

  My heart's now twisted like a tornado,

  All out of shape like it was made of play-doh,

  Missing you as bad as an angel missing a halo.

  Missing three little words I'll never hear again,

  With your voice attached to them,

  Watching time swing by on a pendulum,

  Trying to process thoughts and comprehend.

  Why did I let you go?

  My minds twisted like I was suffering vertigo,

  Missing all the colours you see in a rainbow,

  Missing you like the desert missing the rain flow.

  You not knowing what it's like in my head,

  This is how I write the poem you just read,

  Gives me the words and is the rhymes I'm fed,

  I'll get over it in time but for now enough's been said.

  Immortalized

  The sky is blue,

  yet rain still falls,

  a stranger is kneeling,

  looking over the valley.

  His hands together,

  Outreaching towards the sky.

  Rain trickles down,

  Drop after drop,

  Following the other,

  Into his cupped hands,

  Filling like a pool.

  He remains motionless,

  Not moving to taste,

  Remaining unfaded by the cold.

  Eyes closed,

  Thoughts unknown.

  A plaque resting by his feet,

  Immortalized in stone,

  This life was never meant to be.

  Know That

  If you could read my thoughts,

  Know you are in them every day,

  Even if they are words I never say,

  Know that I love you every day.

  When I'm all alone,

  Typing poems on my phone,

  And you want an answer when you pray,

  Know that I love you every day.

  You are out there somewhere,

  You may not even know that I'm there,

  To be an angel and help you on your way,

  Know that I love you every day.

  Even if my pen ink dries,

  And comes the day that I die,

  And the words I never got to hear you say,

  Know I'll love you beyond the last day.

  When Are You Coming Home?

  Picture in my wallet, wallpaper on my phone,

  Miss you more every day, When are you coming home?

  Tried calling again and got another busy tone,

  Miss you in every way, When are you coming home?

  It's another day where I'm awake before the sun,

  King size bed that's missing someone,

  No word from you again and I'm wondering what I've done,

  Reminiscing on now and back along the path we came from.

  Still sticking to my side like you were next to me,

  Like you'd flutter your eyelash on my cheek then kiss me,

  Not wanting to go to work because you miss me,

  Now writing it all down so I don't forget our history.

  You barely smiled in the last photos I have of you,

  Can't remember the last I love you and wonder if you still do,

  Hope you're safe and happy, making your dreams come true,

  But when are you coming home because I miss you?

  Heart Song

  I
can feel it with my hand,

  But can't put my ear to my chest,

  I miss feeling an ear,

  Listening to every beat and every breath.

  Knowing that there is love in there,

  Knowing that I have so much to share,

  Letting them know that I care,

  That that song plays for them everywhere.

  If you could hear my heart song play,

  Know it's playing for you 24 hours a day,

  Playing for you even when we're apart,

  My heart beating is the song of my heart.

  If you could hear my heart song,

  Would you join in and sing along?

  Let me rest an ear to your chest,

  Telling me to sing along.

  Tell me your heart beats for me,

  Like my heart beats along for you,

  How badly you want to hold me tight,

  Tell you how I want fall for you.

  My heart beating,

  Wanting to write every day,

  Write what the words say,

  As my heart song plays.

  If you could hear my heart song play,

  Singing a song that only you can hear,

  But I don't know what it's saying,

  Because you are not here.

  Heart Song (Part 2)

  I hold my arms across my chest to feel it beat,

  Close my eyes and listen to a song so sweet,

  Praying that someone else will hear it play,

  Whispering to them, don't leave and forever stay.

  I'm trying to find somewhere that my heart belongs,

  Somewhere where I can feel it beat on strong,

  Where we're hand in hand and we can do no wrong,

  And we can sing-a-long with our own heart song.

  Listen in close, with your head on my chest,

  Every little beat lets me know I am blessed,

  Because one day you'll be here and then I'll confess,

  That you'll never hear a heart song stronger than this.

  Knowing that I have so much love to share,

  Knowing that for someone, I want to care,

  Knowing that when they go away, no matter where,

  We're still breathing the same comforting air.

  Knowing that when they go away, no matter where,

  It's up at the same stars that we both stare,

  Under the same sky, under the same sun,

  Somewhere is the other half of my heart song being sung.

  I know there's still much to learn what's in my chest,

  And where you are is anybody's guess,

  But one day we'll be together and my life no longer a mess,

  And I'll live to make you happy is my life long quest.

  But being single for the moment is my only concern,

  Planted in there somewhere waiting to grow like a fern,

  My heart song plays over and over waiting for its turn,

  To feel the love again that it forever yearns.

  Mum (Mother's Day)

  You gave me oxygen,

  When I had no lungs to breathe,

  You gave me food,

  When I had no mouth to eat.

  You carried me,

  When I couldn't walk,

  Knew what I wanted,

  Even when I couldn't talk.

  I heard love in your arms,

  Listening to your heart beat,

  Starting out as a tiny thing,

  Wrapped up in a sheet.

  You were always there,

  When I felt like I was alone,

  You are the core,

  Of what makes a happy home.

  Thank you Mum,

  For all that you've done,

  Happy Mother's Day for this year,

  And all of the years to come.

  Dear Dad

  Dear Dad, As I'm sitting by your grave site,

  I can't figure out what to say or write,

  I still lie alone and cold at night,

  I bet you figured by now that I'd have a life.

  A home, a child, a beautiful wife,

  I guess when you see me I'm a disappointing sight,

  Almost single for a year and unemployed for two,

  Second day in a row here thinking about what to do.

  People give their advice but don't really have a clue,

  About how I feel and tell them, I don't have to,

  Sure they yell at me and of course I deserve it,

  I wonder if in heaven you get a chance to observe it.

  All I think of is that I'm here again,

  Writing with a long lost friend,

  Thinking of everything that has happened,

  Wonder what would be my life's caption.

  Dear Dad, I know that I'm silent again,

  Not saying a word and the only ones are being written,

  But I'm trying here and hoping I'm on the mend,

  I hope you got to read this in heaven.

  Honey

  Lay down your head little Honey,

  Close your eyes and fall asleep,

  Lay down your head little Honey,

  For you we will forever weep.

  Lay down and sleep little Honey,

  There's no more pain for you to fear,

  I'm sorry that when you awake,

  That we won't be here.

  I've asked dad to come and find you,

  He'll ensure that you are safe,

  But to see the rest of us again,

  I'm sorry but you'll just have to wait.

  We will miss you little Honey,

  With your big dog bark,

  You were the smallest of the litter,

  But you had the biggest heart.

  Fall asleep little Honey,

  Wake to heaven