by V. Vaughn
I push through the agony and burning until I am finally in my bear form. I shake out my big body to get my fur to lay right and feel comfortable. It’s been too long, and it feels like airing out a closed-up cabin for the summer.
I walk around the yard, sniffing everything. All of my senses are on alert. But pain zips through my rear left knee, and the best I can do is limp. My bear wants to bound into the woods and run and chase squirrels up trees, but I can’t do it. And that’s what I was afraid of.
My bear doesn’t want to admit he’s upset and needs to exert some dominance, so I limp over to the bushes alongside the yard, lift up my leg, and pee all over them. It’s been six years since I’ve scented this yard, and it’s due for a watering. Bruce will be pissed and probably pee on top of it, but for now my bear will take the win.
Sorry buddy, I say to my bear, we’ll go running another day.
He growls in response, not any happier about our injury than I am.
Mate.
My bear can’t get pleasure from exercise right now, so he’s turned to the need for a woman. Hillary.
Ever since we saw her again, the need to mate has been vibrating inside me. And it’s about more than sex. If that was all we needed, I could find it easily enough. But both my bear and I will only be happy if with one woman. Our mate.
I lie on my stomach in the middle of the yard again and shift back to my human form. Coming back this way is faster but still painful. It’s not how it should be.
When I’m done, I lay on the grass a little while longer, trying to catch my breath. My skin is slick with sweat, and my muscles quiver from the exertion of the shift. It’s not the healthy exhaustion I get after a practice with the team or a hard game, though. It’s off. I sit up, take in a deep breath, and then get to my feet, stumbling a little as my knee throbs. I walk to the deck and put my clothes back on. Just as I finish getting dressed, the back door opens and Bruce lumbers out with two cans of beer in his hand.
He sniffs the air. “Damn it, Alec. You had to scent the yard?” It was something I did a lot when I was in high school. Mostly when I wasn’t happy with his form of parenting. But I’m old enough now that my bear shouldn’t be acting that way. He scowls at me. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing.”
“I saw you limping as a bear, Alec. Something’s wrong.” He hands me a beer then sits in one of the deck chairs. I accept the offering and the chance to talk about what’s bugging me.
I pop the top and take a long pull. The cool liquid soothes my throat, and I wish it had enough alcohol to help take the edge off my mood. I wipe my mouth with the back of my hand. “I blew my knee out at the championships.”
“I saw. You’ve done that a couple time now. We heal that stuff like we’re scratchin’ an itch.”
“We’re supposed to.” I drain the beer then set the can down on the deck.
He frowns. “But you’re not.”
“Nope. Not the way I should be.”
“Fuck,” he says softly.
I nod. “Yeah, that’s about the sum of it.”
“That’s why you’re home.”
I nod again. “I need some down time. Time to really heal, and I figured home was the place to do it.”
He grunts, “What’s the doctor say?”
I shrug. “Not much. You know doctors.”
I can’t bear to tell him what my doctor told me. I can’t bear to see the pity in his eyes when I tell him I might not ever be able to play football again. That I failed.
He eyes me carefully. “You should get a second opinion. Never hurts to talk to another doctor.”
I’d been thinking about the same thing. Maybe I could go see the doctor here in Heartland. He deals with shifters every day. Maybe he’s seen something or done something a sports medicine guy may not have thought of.
I sigh because it’s a long shot.
One I’m afraid to take and be let down again.
I surprise myself when I wonder if Hillary would come with me. I know it makes sense I’d want her by my side, being that she’s my mate and all. But considering she told me to leave her alone, it isn’t something I can even consider asking.
I need another beer. Maybe a whole case of it.
As if he read my mind, Bruce gets up, goes into the house, and comes back with the rest of the six-pack. The two of us sit on the deck and drink the beers in silence. I’m not sure what he’s thinking about, but I’m kicking myself for ruining the best thing I never realized I had. And it’s not football.
Chapter 8
HILLARY
The dryer door slams shut, and the machine whirrs when I push the button to turn it on. I lied to Alec about having someone waiting for me at home. My intention was to reinforce the fact I don’t want him in my life, but now I feel horrible for adding to his misery.
And I feel a little guilty. I used to fantasize about him getting injured and not being able to play. All so he’d come home to me and realize what a mistake he’d made. I never expected it to really happen.
I hoist a basket of clean laundry onto my hip and make my way into my bedroom where I dump it on my bed to fold. I know my daydreams aren’t what caused Alec’s injury, but I can’t stop thinking about how devastating this must be for him.
I snap out a pair of jeans before folding them. The idea of not being able to heal is something that would bother any shifter, and—wait! Oh my god. I recall a guy I met bungee jumping. Doug Parker. He was an orthopedist who was also a shifter, and we dated briefly. I recall him bragging about how he could fix even the most impossible injuries. Doug was definitely full of himself, which seems to be a trait I like in a man. But while he may have been exaggerating, it makes me wonder if he could help Alec.
There’s only one way to find out. I go to the kitchen to grab my phone and find his number so I can shoot the good doctor a text asking if he has any experience with fixing stubborn knees.
It’s not until afterward that I consider what I’ve done. Doug had a hard time with me breaking things off. Being a hyena shifter, he’s got an ego the size of Montana, and he couldn’t believe I didn’t think the world revolved around him. To be fair, I was still hung up on Alec and nothing he could have done would have made me want to be together for long. What worries me is that Doug may think I’m using this as a ploy to get back together. But if he can help Alec, it will be worth the hassle.
I smile as I lift a stack of T-shirts to put in a drawer. It might give me a little satisfaction to watch Alec squirm with jealousy. I glance down at my phone, hoping Doug will reply right away. Like most people, though, he probably has a life, and I shouldn’t expect to get an answer just yet.
I wander into the living room and plop down on the couch with the intention of watching a chick flick, and I think about my friend Lexi, wishing she were here. Now that she’s married, she’s never around to hang out. I get it, she’s head over heels for her mate, Tristan, who she married only months ago, and it could be a while before they come up for air. But it would be nice to see her again. She’s the kind of girlfriend I need to spill this whole Alec thing to. I send her a quick text asking when we can get together.
Once I find a movie that looks interesting, I struggle to pay attention. My bunny is too full of energy, and I decide what I really need is a good frolic in the woods.
Yes! All the way to Alec’s!
Darn it. If I let my bunny loose, she’s going straight for what she wants. Alec. But I have an idea. I have a garden in my backyard just so I can nibble on the fresh veggies and leaves when my bunny wants to. I also have a fence up around it to keep it safe from the pesky racoon shifter down the road. He’s helped himself to my veggies more than once and isn’t even polite about it.
I go out and shift inside the fence to let my bunny bounce around. After we get our fill of bunny food and I’m human again, I am able to relax. I watch my movie and get a good night’s sleep.
When I get up in the morning, I’m pleased to see I have
a text from Doug, and he suggests I call him to discuss my issues. I grab a cup of coffee and sit at the kitchen table before I make my call.
“Hillary,” he coos as if he thinks I’m about to beg for his affection.
“Doug, good to hear your voice. Thanks for getting back to me.”
“Sure thing, babe. Talk to me. What thrill seeking thing did you do this time?”
“This isn’t about me. I have a friend whose career is in jeopardy. He’s a football player with a knee that won’t heal. I think it’s because he’s injured it too many times and his body has given up.” I pour on the charm even if my tone makes me want to gag. “When he told me about it, of course, I thought of you.”
“Oh,” Doug says with what I think is disappointment in his voice.
So, I pull out my trump card. “His name is Alec Thompson. You may have heard of him.”
“Al—Al—Alec Thompson?” I can practically see the spittle coming out of his mouth as he sputters. “The Alec Thompson? The GOAT?”
“Ah, I think that term refers to Tom Brady.”
“Oh, Hillary. Silly bunny, you have no idea. Alec Thompson is most definitely going to be the greatest of all time. He just needs a few more years to catch up.”
I sigh, because right now that doesn’t look promising. “Well, if that’s going to happen, he needs his knee to work again.”
“Right. Yeah, babe. I can totally fix him up.” Keys click in the background. “I’ve got wiggle room today if you can bring him in here.”
“If I can get him there?”
He chuckles. “A guy with a bum knee shouldn’t be driving. Stress on the joint and all.” His hyena peeks out when his tone gets conniving. “You understand, don’t you?”
I understand perfectly. Doug may be excited to do this for a famous player like Alec, but I’m the icing on the cake and I better not disappoint him. “Of course. I’ll let you know when we can be there.”
“I suggest you wear a skirt. One of those shorts ones I like.”
I roll my eyes so hard they might pop out of my head, but I manage to hold my tongue and say, “As a matter of fact, that’s exactly what I’m wearing today. I’ll be in touch.” I hang up before I let him know what I’m really thinking.
“Man alive, what have I just done?” I ask nobody in particular.
My bunny answers anyway by bouncing up and down and doing flips with her excitement. She sure does love attention, and I think I’ve just set myself up for a good, old-fashioned, love-triangle fiasco.
I let out a sigh and get ready for work.
Running short on time, I don’t have a chance to call Alec until I’ve finished prepping the dining room for breakfast, and I move to the remote coffee station to contact him in private.
He answers groggily, and I say, “Alec, I’m sorry to wake you, but I think you’ll be glad I did.”
“Sure,” He clears his throat. “No worries. What’s up?”
I can’t help the excitement that oozes out with my next words. “After we spoke yesterday, I remembered a guy I met bungee jumping. He’s an orthopedist and really good.”
“How good?” Alec snaps at me, clearly asking about something other than his medical skills.
I ignore it, knowing I’m still going to have to clarify things on the way to Doug’s office. “He’s very good at his job, Alec. And he’s agreed to squeeze you in today.”
“Oh. Well…”
I sigh, because I’m afraid Alec is scared to get his hopes up. “Alec, you really should get a second opinion.”
“I know. It’s just—" He blows out a huff of air. “I shifted last night, and it didn’t go well.”
My heart sinks. “I’m so sorry. But this is exactly why you should talk to Doug. Maybe he can help.”
“Doug?”
His growl makes me roll my eyes for the second time today, and I wonder if I can get away with not telling Alec I dated Doug. For a split second, that is. “Crazy, I know but when went bungee jumping, we all called each other by our first names.”
“Right. Sorry, you know how jealous my bear is.”
“I do. So? Will you go?”
“I—Jeez, I shouldn’t ask this. I have no right to—"
“I’ll drive you.”
“You will? Hillary, are you sure? Because I know how you feel about me.”
“I’m sure. I’m on the short shift today. After I go home and change, I can pick you up around noon.”
“I’ll be ready,” he says with excitement in his voice. And then he gets serious. “Hillary, thank you. I really appreciate it.”
“You’re welcome.”
Helping him feels good, and I turn around with a smile on my face only to find Mandy standing there with her hands on her hips. “What on earth do you think you’re doing?”
“How much did you hear?”
“I heard you’re meeting Alec at noon. Why?”
I hate that my cheeks flush pink. “I’m driving him to a doctor I know for a second opinion.”
“Girl,” she drawls out, “you need to watch yourself. I picked your sobbing body up off the floor one too many times after he broke your heart. What are you thinking?”
“Don’t worry. I have no intention of letting Alec get under my skin and hurt me again. I’m making a connection for him with someone who could save his career. Does that sound like something I’d do if I wanted him to stick around?”
“Are you sure that’s all you’re doing?”
Am I? Of course, I’m wary about helping Alec, about even being around him, but he’s in so much emotional pain over losing his dream that if I can help him get it back, I want to. I’ll always care about the man regardless of what he’s done to me. I say, “You’d do the same thing for someone you once loved.”
She squints at me. “Don’t be so sure of that.”
“I’ll be fine. I swear I’ve built up a brick wall around my heart.” But even as I say the words, I know they’re not true. The bricks may be sitting there waiting for me to stack them, but I can’t seem to bring myself to reach for the spade to spread the mortar.
Chapter 9
HILLARY
Drawers scrape and slam as I open and close them trying to decide what to wear. Which is ridiculous. This is not a date. I need to pick up Alec in a half hour to get to the appointment on time. Nervous electricity zings through me, and I wonder if I’ve made a mistake taking him to Doug. I remind myself this is just one friend helping another. But my bunny is not listening to me.
My bunny is sure this is a date. She hasn’t stopped bouncing around since Alec agreed to go.
This is a great first step, my bunny says. I glower in response.
To rebuilding your relationship.
I shake my head, denying it even as I put on a new bra and spritz perfume into my cleavage. I’m not doing it for him. But a girl has to keep up with her usual routine, right? And it can’t hurt to show him what he’s been missing.
I pull on a simple white T-shirt and slide on a short, flowy skirt before I brush my hair up into a high ponytail. I stand back up and inspect my hairdo in my dressing mirror. Alex always liked a ponytail. I sigh. I’m not fooling myself or my bunny. I do care if Alec finds me attractive.
I sag onto the edge of my bed. Finding your mate and being together shouldn’t be this hard. Why can’t I have what my friend Lexi and her husband Tristan have? Their relationship is perfect. He’s so wonderful to her and treats her like a queen.
Although, Tristan wasn’t as attentive to Lexi’s needs before the car accident she had that sent her to the hospital, a human hospital at that, with amnesia. I remember how Lexi used to worry that Tristan was never going to commit to her.
My bunny tries to cheer me up. You see? People can change. Look at Tristan. Once he knew how much he truly needed and loved Lexi, he completely changed.
I know. I sigh again. It is possible Alec has changed. I hate when my bunny makes more sense than I do.
And I’m jus
t going to say, I guarantee you Tristan’s tiger always knew he couldn’t live without Lexi, and he was stupid to even try.
I laugh at my bunny. You’re pushing it, girl.
She bounces up and down giggling.
I get up and take a final look at myself in the mirror and remind myself I’m a friend who is taking a former boyfriend to the doctor. I’m going to make the connection. This is not a date.
Whatever. My bunny tells me. But this is so a date.
I drive a pale-green Volkswagen bug, and when I pull up in front of Alec’s house, it occurs to me he’s going to be a tight fit in the passenger seat. I’m sure he knows I’m here, and I get out to go over and adjust his seat before he comes outside.
It clunks into place at the setting furthest back, and I stand up to face him. “Hey.”
He looks me up and down and then blurts out, “You look gorgeous.”
Heat fills me, and I fight to keep my cheeks from flushing. “Thanks. Ready to go?”
He lets out a long breath. “Let’s do this.”
I know he’s nervous, and once he’s squeezed into his seat, I get behind the wheel to drive. I reach for the radio to help distract Alec. “Anything you want to listen to?”
“No, doesn’t matter.”
I flip on the pop station I like and turn it down low enough to hear in case he wants to talk. Which apparently he does, because he asks, “Do you live alone? Because you mentioned you had someone waiting for you last night.”
I don’t look at him as I answer, avoiding my lie. “Yes, I live alone.”
“So, you’re just dating right now. Nothing serious.”
I feel stupid about lying to him last night and figure this is a good time to talk about Doug too. “There wasn’t anyone waiting for me, Alec. I said that to have a reason to leave. But I do have to tell you more about Dr. Doug Parker.”
