books 1 - 3

by Ella J. Smyth

  “Ew! Get off!” Honi wiped the slobber of his face, scowling at his wolf. Ho’neo’s sapphire-blue eyes laughed as he jumped out of the way of Honi’s swipe. The spirit wolf didn’t give up so easily and came at him from the other side. Growling and grumbling, the animal shoved his hard head against Honi’s shoulder, trying to push him to get up.

  When that didn’t work, the giant predator jumped on top of Honi’s chest and started licking him in earnest. Spluttering and spitting, the Mekui’te had no choice but to surrender. The moment the spirit animal read his intent, he jumped off and waited. Sitting on his haunches, tongue lolling, the large beast seemed to laugh at the puny human, struggling to get to his feet.

  “Fine, you win,” Honi grumbled, hiding his amusement. Wiping the wetness off his face and neck, he turned away and looked at the landscape apprehensively. Deep inside, he knew that it wasn’t boredom that stopped him from returning. The several horrific attacks on his girlfriend he’d witnessed not long ago had colored his perception of the spirit world.

  Last year, it had been a safe place for him—a place that very few other humans ever managed to get to. But now, after everything that had happened, it didn’t feel safe anymore. Every time the grass rustled, or a shadow briefly covered the sun, Honi flinched. He suspected that he suffered from post-traumatic stress disorder. That was the real reason he couldn’t sleep and refused to meditate much anymore. He would live happily if he never had to return to the spirit world. And yet, here he was.

  He was so lost in his own thoughts that it came as a shock when Ho’neo pushed at the back of his knees. Honi’s legs buckled, and he nearly went down. His glare was met by an unimpressed shaking of the large predator’s head and a lolling grin. The wolf trotted a few steps ahead, then turned around.

  Come on, chicken. I’ll protect you. There was a tone in the animal’s voice that Honi interpreted as smugness. He was used to sharing his mental space with the telepathic spirit animal, but today Ho’neo irritated him. Why couldn’t he just shut up? It was all his fault anyway. Honi had been more than happy to carry on with his daily routine.

  He missed Adi. If he was totally honest with himself, he had to admit he should try harder to spend quality time with her. She was the only other spirit walker he knew, and she still had a lot to learn. Between preparing his thesis and guiding her through her own meditative training, there was precious little time for anything romantic.

  He was ripped out of his thoughts yet again when his hand was gripped gently by two rows of giant teeth. The spirit animal tugged carefully, and Honi finally gave in to the wolf’s insistence. Together they walked down the hill, Ho’neo skipping ahead and Honi trudging behind.

  Honi slowly blinked his eyes open, squinting against the bright sunshine. He always took a long time coming back to himself after a trip to the other realm. He would probably feel groggy all day. Without Ho’neo bugging him, he wouldn’t have bothered today. But his wolf had been a pain in the ass since Honi had woken up this morning.

  He’d jumped on the bed, licking Honi’s face, and whined until he’d given in. He hated meditating right after waking up. Sleep and trance were so similar to each other that he fell asleep more often than not. Usually he slipped into a trance within seconds, but this morning, it had been harder than usual. His nerves had been on edge, and he didn’t know if it was the stress of still not having handed in an outline for his thesis, or his personal issues.

  Adi had told him how she’d beaten the entity that had ruled over the spirit realm. She was convinced that the queen was dead, but Honi doubted it. His mind returned to Adi. Honi stretched out under his covers, luxuriating in the smooth fabric’s caress on his naked skin.

  Not only had he not seen his girlfriend for days, it seemed even longer since they’d had sex. Honi’s hands slowly pushed along his chest, one hand lingering on a nipple while the other glided lower. His index finger first circled his nipple, then pinched it gently between his thumb and middle finger. He sighed with how good it felt. He was just getting into it, little sparks of lust shooting into his groin, when his phone rang.

  He ignored it. His eyes closed and his fingers brushing against his dick, he imagined Adi’s face close to his belly. Her eyes trained on his, hot mouth wide open, about to sink down on him. The phone chirped again. Honi huffed in annoyance, the mood broken. He glanced at the display, then quickly sat up, pulling the blanket up to cover his body. If the shaman called twice, it was important. No way would he take John’s call naked, though. Ugh.

  3

  Honi was late. Again. Why the heck could that boy not show up on time? Did he think his time was more valuable than hers? Adi sat at their usual table, her arms crossed, irritation rising by the minute.

  She’d sent him a text yesterday, asking to meet up. Seriously. She had to schedule appointments with her boyfriend now. Did he want to be in a relationship with her at all?

  When they’d first met, there’d been such a current of attraction between them. That spark was still there, but they didn’t spend enough time with each other for it to go anywhere. They had different lecture schedules now—Honi’s anthropology classes and her German classes were taught in opposite parts of the university. Honi was working hard, both teaching freshmen classes and preparing his master’s thesis.

  The thesis that she’d largely influenced. She’d told him lesser-known German fairy tales, and they’d both been amazed at the parallels to Honi’s Great Plains tribal stories. Her suggested title, “Similarities in Global Mythologies: A Comparison of Legends of the Indigenous People of the Great Plains and European Folk Tales,” had been enthusiastically accepted by Honi’s academic advisor.

  Honi wanted to graduate as quickly as possible, and Adi appreciated that. His tribe supplemented his college education, and their funds were limited. And yet—was she not important enough for him to carve out a little of his time? Adi looked at the phone in front of her. No message, no email, and he was now officially thirty minutes late. If he’d been anybody else, she would have left already.

  She took a deep breath and held it for a moment. Right, time to go. Her lips pressed into a tight line, she grabbed her bag and got up. She’d made her way to the door and reached out for the handle when it flew open towards her. Startled, she stepped back.

  Honi rushed in, his lungs pumping as if he’d been running. He barely avoided colliding with Adi. His eyes widened when he realized she was about to leave.

  “I’m really sorry!” he panted. “John called, and I had to talk to him.”

  Adi’s brow furrowed. Of course. Making her wait half an hour was perfectly acceptable, because John called. She barely contained her internal eye roll. It wasn’t the first time, either. Honi had stood her up so many times because of John’s phone calls, she’d lost count.

  “And you didn’t think you might let me know?” she asked in a deceptively quiet voice. The quiet before the storm. Honi had that deer-in-the-headlights look, torn between running away and facing her.

  “No? Yes?” Then he took a deep breath and composed himself. “I apologized, didn’t I? What else do you want me to say?”

  Adi’s face hurt with trying to keep calm. “How about, ‘it won’t happen again’? Oh wait, you said that last time. And the time before.”

  Her arms crossed, she scowled at him. She was taking a stand, right here, in the open door of the cafeteria. Maybe not the best place, but hey, he had it coming. Honi visibly sagged as he took her arm.

  “Come inside, let’s talk. I really am sorry, but it was important.”

  Adi allowed herself to be escorted back to a table. Before she could ask him to get her something, he was already at the counter, ordering beverages and rhubarb pie. Her lips tightened even further. This wasn’t good. Every time he had bad news for her, he tried to sweeten her up. Adi rubbed her hand over her face. She was so tired of the drama, of John whistling and Honi jumping.

  He came back, balancing a tray with chocolate frappé, tea, a
nd two plates with pie. Holding the tray with one hand, he carefully set the dishes on the tabletop. Then he plopped into the seat opposite Adi’s. There was a weariness about him, the way he held his head and refused to meet her eyes.

  After a few moments of awkward silence, Adi spoke first. “So what did he want?”

  “Who?”

  Adi glared at him. “Who do you think? John, of course.”

  Honi stared at his folded hands. “He asked me to come see him and go over the stipend budget.” His tone was flat and defeated.

  Adi sat up straighter. “Is there an issue with your grant?”

  “I don’t know. He didn’t say. I suppose I’ll find out soon.” Honi hesitated again. “He… he suggested you’re a distraction. He wants me to stop seeing you so much.”

  What the hell?

  “Seriously? I’m sorry, we’re hardly seeing each other as it is. How am I a distraction? When I help you with your coursework? When I type up your notes?”

  Adi’s voice had been rising, and Honi’s eyes darted around the room. That pissed her off even more.

  “What, am I embarrassing you?”

  “He didn’t tell me to break it off with you. He just said that you might distract me from my purpose…” His voice trailed off as he realized what he’d said.

  Adi’s emotional dial had moved to anger and come out the other side. There were so many things wrong with what she’d just heard. She felt herself go ice-cold.

  “I might distract you from your purpose,” she parroted him. “Which is what? I thought your purpose was to train me to be a spirit walker like you?”

  She laughed bitterly. “Scratch that, I’m already a spirit walker, and as I recall, a better one than you. If anything, you’re distracting me from my purpose of balancing the worlds.” She glared at him so hard that if her eyes were able to shoot flames, he would have crumbled to ash. “And what would you have said if John had ordered you to break it off?”

  When Honi just stared at her, stunned, with his mouth open, she stood up. “You know what? We’re done here. Why don’t you go see John and call me when you’re back? I’ll decide then if I’m in the mood to be distracting you again.”

  She stood up and, with a final look at Honi’s dumbstruck face, whirled around and walked away. The satisfaction of having the last word lasted exactly until the door slammed shut behind her.

  The entire way back to the dorm, Adi was fuming.

  “What a complete ass-hat. How dare he? What the hell? He is such an idiot.”

  She was halfway between the cafeteria building and the library before she noticed the weird glances other students were throwing her. Several girls coming her way jumped aside to let her pass. She heard them whisper and caught a few words.

  “That’s the crazy chick from last year.”

  Yep, that’s who she was. The crazy chick. Except she wasn’t. She was a spirit walker, one of the chosen few who could travel between the spirit realm and the human world.

  The thought acted like a cold shower. She took a deep breath, and the anger disappeared as quickly as it had come on. Honi was the only other spirit walker she knew of. He’d saved her life. He’d sacrificed himself to keep her safe. She loved him, and he loved her. But somehow, over the last few months, it didn’t seem enough anymore.

  What do you do when the reality of everyday life encroaches on your relationship? What if the feelings you have for another person are strong, but maybe not strong enough to survive when you’re no longer the top priority in their lives?

  Adi opened the door to her tiny room and made a beeline to her bed. As she lay down, arms behind her head, she thought of Honi, and her chest ached. He had the warmest eyes, like black cherries. When they made love, his long, glossy hair fell like a curtain around both their faces while he kissed her.

  Adi continued thinking about the young man, how much they’d been through. After a while, the fabric under her head felt uncomfortably wet. She impatiently wiped the moisture from her face. It was too early to call it a day. But maybe… maybe they needed a break.

  She sat up and walked to her desk. The letter was still there, waiting for her. She hadn’t even managed to tell Honi about it. Her anger at his dismissive behavior had overridden everything. She picked up the paper and read through it again. It was only nine months. If they were meant to be, they would survive it. And maybe if she went away, it would give Honi a chance to work out his issues with his tribal elders.

  It took a lot of commitment to make a relationship work at the best of times. If Honi wasn’t that interested, she’d give him an out. The time apart might help him focus on what he really wanted.

  Adi sighed. She’d never thought she would leave the young Mekui’te voluntarily, but the way their relationship was going, she had no choice. If she made him choose between her, his tribe, and his family, she was not at all sure she’d win.

  4

  Honi stood by the table, wondering what had just happened. He hated—hated—the way Adi blew up sometimes. Okay, so he’d been late. He replayed the conversation in his mind and cringed. Yeah, maybe he shouldn’t have been quite so blunt, repeating John’s words back to her. Nobody liked to be called a “distraction.”

  Ho’neo whined in sympathy and pushed his cold nose into Honi’s palm. He looked down and surreptitiously patted the wolf’s head. Then he sat down heavily. Now that he was here, might as well have some of the pie. He picked up his fork and broke the golden-brown crust. Just as he bit down on the tart filling, somebody sat down opposite him.

  “Honi, my man!” Sam laughed when Honi’s face scrunched up in a grimace. “Yeah, could have warned you. The rhubarb pie is so sour, it’s inedible.”

  Honi nodded as he sucked on his teeth, trying to get the acid out of his mouth before it dissolved the enamel. Sam’s companion, a small spirit fox, opened his mouth and seemed to laugh along with his human. Honi gave him a quick, filthy look before concentrating on his friend. Sam didn’t know he had a fox following him everywhere, and Honi wasn’t going to tell him.

  “So… did I just see Adi storm off?” Sam’s pale blue eyes sparkled with mischief. He’d been party to several fights in the couple’s temperamental relationship. Honi didn’t have many friends on campus, and he treasured Sam for his calm and steadfast support.

  After last year’s events, which had cemented Honi’s reputation as a weird loner, Sam had stood by him and accepted Adi into their friendship circle with admirable ease. Sam still looked at him expectantly. His fox nosed at his temple without his human taking any notice.

  Honi sighed before replying, “I screwed up. Again.”

  He bent down, took the straw between his lips, and sucked noisily. He closed his eyes for a moment. Damn, that was good. Cold, sweet, with a depth of flavor that only good quality chocolate could add, combined with bitter coffee undertones. When he opened his eyes again, Sam was laughing at him.

  “Do you need a moment alone with your beverage?”

  Honi grinned weakly, acknowledging the joke. Then his face turned serious again.

  “Do you think I’m a good boyfriend?”

  Sam and his fox both tilted their heads to the left. It would have been funny, had Honi been in the mood.

  “Um, why’re you asking me? Shouldn’t you discuss that with—I don’t know—your girlfriend?”

  Honi sighed again. “I should, but every time we see each other lately, we get into fights.”

  “Fights about what?”

  “Mainly about how much time we spend together.” Honi looked up.

  Sam had stopped smiling. “You mean, how much time you don’t spend together,” he said. “You know I’m your friend, right?”

  Honi swallowed. Sam reminding him of their friendship meant nothing good. “Sure,” he replied.

  “This is the first time in three weeks I’ve seen you. And only because I ran into you by chance…”

  “You know I’m under a lot of stress. I have to get this paper fin
ished, and—”

  Sam interrupted him. “Adi told me last week that she hadn’t seen you in ten days. What’s going on, Honi? It’s bad enough shutting out your best friend, but your girlfriend? Are you surprised she feels neglected?” Sam stopped and took a deep breath.

  Honi stared. That was quite a speech for his usually quiet friend. But damn, he was right. He had been neglecting Adi. She hadn’t slept over for weeks, and even when they met for training sessions, he had to rush off right after. Sam’s voice interrupted his train of thought.

  “You’ve got to talk to her, Honi. I know you two love each other, but she’s not the kind of girl to hang around forever. I don’t know why you keep pushing her away, but you need to stop. Talk to her before it’s too late.”

  Sam finished off the pie in two bites and got up. He waved before walking out of the building, his spirit animal’s tail wrapped around his neck. Honi stared after him, wondering what he meant by that. It seemed that Sam had spent more time with Adi than Honi had. What did he know that Honi didn’t? He had a really bad feeling about this.

  Deep in thought, Honi returned the tray on autopilot and barely registered the server’s smile when he handed over the empty cups and plates. He’d just left the cafeteria, walking quickly towards his appointment to meet with his thesis advisor, when his phone buzzed again.

  Honi answered without checking the display and came to a sudden halt. John’s agitated voice made his hair stand on end.

  “John, calm down. What’s going on?” He pushed his apprehension from his voice.

  “Honi, I’m so sorry. I just finished meeting with the fiscal team, and I’ve got bad news…” His voice trailed off.