Saving Amy Jayden

by Rose Verde

  She tsked at him and her gaze flickered between the two of them. “What have you done to get her so riled up?”

  Amy tugged her hand from his but he held fast. All along the trail she’d told herself that whatever he did didn't bother her. Yet watching the two of them as they talked, she had realized it did bother her.

  Initially, Angel’s word had helped but after some time she wasn't sure. “Let go of my hand,” she said hating the quiver in her voice.

  Nevada reached out and tilted her chin but she turned her head. “We will talk tonight, Amy. I'll find you.”

  He released her hand and Amy turned and walked through the back door.

  Chapter Twenty-eight

  BROOKE CAME INTO THE dining room. Just like her to walk in when all was set. There was the contrast between the two women. Brooke loved to be served, Amy served. She took the seat beside him and when her legs touched his, he moved slightly.

  Amy hadn’t returned. He hadn't planned to make her angry and there was no way he’d have talked to her in the presence of anyone else. That was why he had let her go. He only hoped that giving her opportunity to hold onto her dignity hadn’t made him come off as nonchalant.

  He looked towards the door. Maybe he should go and check on her.

  She walked in just then.

  “I hope you haven't waited on account of me.” she said, taking a seat beside Sam. She didn't look at him but at least he could see she’d gained her composure.

  Nevada said the grace and bowls of foods were passed around. After the first course, he insisted Sam sit down and, between him and Amy, they took the dishes and replaced them with another. As they served others, Nevada thought again how Brooke would’ve been too much of a liability at the ranch.

  She was comfortable sitting and eating while she was served. Amy wouldn't do that.

  Sometimes, when things didn't work out, one would feel as if everything had gone wrong with life. Brooke only imagined she wanted him again. If she knew what came along with life on the ranch, she’d change her mind.

  Amy ate quietly not attempting to join in the discussion.

  Nevada didn't make any effort either. He'd have to do the talking as soon as he could. Only he couldn't help the fact that he had guests he was responsible for.

  “I'll help wash up. You can all head out to the living room. I'll catch up with you.” He caught up with Sam. “Please, go take your rest. We have a full day tomorrow.”

  “I just need—”

  He shook his head. “Nothing more for tonight. Please.”

  Sam excused herself to her room. The woman was something else. Alone with Amy, maybe they could talk now.

  “I'll help too,” Brooke said, walking into the kitchen.

  Amy looked at him and dropped the towel. “I wouldn’t want to be in your way then.” She stepped past him.

  “Amy, I'll find you later.”

  She didn't respond. Silence hung in the air following her exit.

  “What is wrong with her?”

  “Brooke, don't even start. I don't care to discuss Amy with you. If you have anything else to say fine, if not, keep your opinion and let's work.”

  She huffed and pouted, but kept quiet. A half hour later they finished the chores.

  Nevada checked to make sure the animals had been fed. It was drizzling. There wouldn't be anything outdoors tonight. He went to his room and picked up the guitar he’d loaded in the wagon. He’d learned from one of the men that played in the subway he usually slept in. Who knew where the man was now?

  He made his way back to the sitting room. They had a game of chess going on. Angel sat in a corner; a bible opened on his lap. The rain had started in earnest, but it was a gentle fall, nothing like the one from last week.

  He sat and watched them play. Nevada surveyed the faces of his guests. Fatigue was setting in. The young man had his arm around his wife, others were grumbling about the rain trapping them indoors.

  “You play guitar?” Greg asked.

  “A little.”

  “Can you play some songs?”

  “I could. Anything to help you all pass the night. Since you asked, do you have a song in mind?”

  “Play Great is Thy Faithfulness.”

  Nevada balanced the bass guitar on his thigh. He had every reason to be grateful. One time it looked as though all hope was lost and here he was doing what he wanted to do. The whole future looked brighter. His faith had also received a boost in the process.

  He strummed the strings and then smiled at his audience. The young wife cuddled closer to her husband. Even Angel put his bible aside.

  They all waited. Nevada closed his eyes. “For Your glory Lord,” he whispered as he started to play.

  When he strummed the last line, they clapped. One song after another, he played far into the night. When they all left for the night, he told Brooke he was going to talk to Amy and to make herself scarce. He felt bad having to be hard on her but she invited herself, she’d better entertain herself.

  He owed Amy an explanation and that he'd do.

  THE RAINS HAD CEASED. Amy laid down listening to the music coming from the living room.

  Coward.

  Why had she not stayed in the kitchen? Her eyes burned. It was so pathetic that one thing she hadn’t allowed in her twenty-six years had crept in behind her and floored her big time.

  What would Brooke think?

  Amy realized the music had stopped too. Had everyone gone to sleep? Nevada would come, as he said he would.

  She turned on her back and stared at the ceiling of the log house. Brooke would keep him from coming.

  A soft knock filtered through the door.

  Amy sat up and listened but didn't answer.

  The knock sounded again. Afraid he'd wake up others who probably had gone to bed; she padded to the door and opened it. “You didn't think I could be sleeping?”

  “I'm sorry,” he looked away briefly and then back. “I won't get a wink of sleep knowing you believe what I think you do. Besides I doubt if you'd sleep either.”

  Ignoring his perception, she opted for tact. “And what do you think I believe?”

  “Can you step out for a bit? I won't keep you unnecessarily.”

  She hesitated. Did she want to know? Maybe not, but she'd listen and then walk away. Trusting her heart to someone was too scary. “Go ahead. I'll be there in a moment.” He didn't move. “Seriously,” she said. “I'll be right there.”

  Amy needed to bring her heartbeat under control and gather herself together. After a few minutes, she draped a shawl over her shoulders and stepped out.

  The after-rains smell enveloped her as she walked onto the patio. The night was tranquil, the breeze cool. The trees swayed gently.

  Nevada stood, tall and elegant, his back to her. His hair had grown to his shoulders. With all he’d been doing on the ranch lately, he probably didn’t have time to bother about getting a haircut.

  Amy stood a few feet away and waited. He turned toward her and surveyed her with appreciation in his eyes. “You look beautiful tonight, Amy.”

  Warmth flushed through her and she smiled at him. “Thank you.”

  “Come have a seat.”

  Amy took the few steps to reach the patio bench and slid onto it.

  “Amy, I want to apologize for Brooke. I didn't know she was coming. I wouldn't ask you to put yourself out only to treat you this way.”

  “It doesn't matter,” she said shrugging. She wouldn't make a big deal about it.

  He sat beside her, took her hand threading his fingers through hers. The butterflies in her belly took flight. “It matters to me, Amy. I wanted you to enjoy this ride. How do you think I feel watching you ride alone while knowing you were doing it because I asked?”

  She tugged her hand from his. He had a way of making it difficult for her to think.

  “You knew her before me....”

  “I haven't had any form of contact with her in a while. I'm telling you the tr
uth from my heart, Amy.”

  “So, how did she know about the trip?” Amy asked before she could stop herself. This wasn't how to prove that it didn't matter.

  “She wouldn't say. You remember the girl I told you I dated last year? That’s her. Unfortunately, she met this rich guy after we started going out—I didn’t know at the time. I guess she realized what she’d miss dating a ranch hand.” Nevada stood up facing her, arms folded across his broad chest.

  Amy saw the pain of what he was saying flit across his gaze. It cost him to tell her this. “It was the first time I felt a real connection or what I thought was a real connection with another human.”

  A branch fell from a tree a little distance away and Nevada turned to look. After a brief moment he returned his gaze to her. She held his gaze and waited. “Brooke started picking quarrels over everything. After a few days, she finally told me she wasn't interested in me that I....” he trailed off and stared into the night.

  Amy felt his pain. She stood up and came to him, touching his arm lightly. His muscles bunched under her fingers but he didn't pull away.” You don't have to tell me, I understand.”

  “Do you?” He asked his eyes searching hers. They looked dark and sad, he shifted.

  “I owe you an explanation and I know I should have done this long ago. That day she told me I was a loser and left. I despaired but held out hope that she'd return, but she didn't. I had several challenges afterwards and I came to believe her words to me. I don't have a right to Waterhole Ranch but at some point, it was my ticket to fulfill my dream.”

  He pushed a hand through his hair and came back and sat down. “I later found out the real reason she left me. I don’t have any idea how she found out about the trip unless she’s been keeping tabs on me somehow.”

  “I believe you. It was childish of me to behave the way I did.” Amy took her seat again.

  He stared at her for a long moment. “Amy you’re not childish. I know you said you want to be friends and I’m sorry I've taken a few liberties... I want you to know today, Amy Jayden, I may not be the kind of man you want but Brooke is not the woman for me.”

  She inhaled the scent that was all Nevada and wanted to cry. Why would he say he wasn’t the man for her? After all he told her today and all she'd seen, he was more than she wanted in a man.

  “I’ve fallen in love with you, right from the day I set my eyes on you. I told myself that you’re not for me but my head and heart won't listen. I'm not saying this to upset you but to clear the air between us. You have nothing to fear with Brooke.”

  Her heart swelled and crashed at the same time when she realized what he’d said. He loved her but he would never see himself as good enough...

  “I've put both of you side by side and she's found wanting.”

  He smiled but a look of defeat crossed his eyes. “Thanks for listening and believing me.”

  She couldn't swallow the lump that lodged in her throat. Too bad she wished she’d not set to course what had led to this.

  He reached out and caressed her face briefly. “We have a long day tomorrow. I'll wait for you to get in,” he said a small smile playing on his lips.

  She took two steps to him, pulled his head down and kissed him lightly on the lips. Then, Amy turned without a backward glance and headed for her room.

  Chapter Twenty-nine

  HE SHOULDN'T READ ANYTHING into the kiss. Sure, she wanted to make him feel better but it hadn't. It had stoked the longing in him, longing for a love between them that could never be.

  The few times he kissed her she hadn't pulled away. That was twice if he included the one when she asked him to thank her. He wished he had something to offer Amy, then he'd be able to ask her to give them a chance.

  Now he couldn't. He’d confessed his love for her but she hadn’t said anything.

  Nevada plowed a hand through his hair and let out a groan. He wouldn't get any sleep tonight and now that he had cleared the air, he'd better face reality.

  He retired to his room and after wrestling with his thoughts for a while, he turned them to God. He didn't know when he succumbed to sleep.

  SAM RANG THE KITCHEN bell signaling everyone to the dining room. Amy walked in with a large bowl of grits which she placed beside bowls of country sausages and bacon. There was also hash browns and gravy, biscuits and buttery toast and syrups to go with them, whatever was to the choosing of everyone.

  Nevada walked in after her and placed a towering plate of silverware on the table. He sat beside Amy.

  His hand brushed hers and she met his gaze briefly and looked away. Awareness simmered between them. Things would never be the same now he’d told her how he felt. She wasn’t looking down her nose at him like he was afraid she would.

  No one noticed the exchange between them, oh, except Brooke who made it her duty to watch them. He chose to ignore her. Everyone settled down and fixed their plates. Nevada said the grace again.

  “Everyone sleep well?” Sam asked as she checked to see that all was available that was needed.

  “Slept like a baby,” Greg said. “And I must say this is a meal fit for a king.”

  “Why, thank you. I had help,” she said, a fond smile toward Amy.

  When Amy first came home, Nevada had told himself he neither had time nor inclination for an attraction to her but all that had changed. With every thoughtful action she wormed deeper into his heart.

  Across from him, Brooke sat giving him a baleful look. “You should ask me how my night was.”

  Nevada hiked up a brow. “Quit whining. I told you this wasn't some pleasure ride,” he added softening his tone.

  Matt grinned, “Man, that's no way to treat a fiancée. I haven't seen you take good care of her.”

  “Because we’re not what she's making us out to be.” He inclined his head giving her a coy smile. “Will you say otherwise?” He dared her to deny. He was glad to see her squirm. She’d set herself up. He took pity on her. “I hope your night was good.”

  She mumbled a response and Nevada turned to his meal. Others took his cue and dug into theirs. Meal completed, Nevada glanced at his watch he stood up. “It’s 8:00.”

  Lunch packs were passed around to be eaten somewhere on the trail. “Today, we'll split into our groups like yesterday. We have our outdoor camp five miles from here and the next set of pens another ten miles away. Angel and the others rode out early this morning to set camp, so they'll have it ready by the time we arrive.”

  He waited to be sure everyone was listening. “When we ride out now, we'll lead the cattle fifteen miles. Then we return to camp, meaning we have twenty-five miles ahead of us today. You all did well, like pros, yesterday, so you shouldn’t have any problems. I'll make trips between the groups and attend to any problems you may have, just give me a holler.

  “Watch out for snakes. On a cool day like this, they could lurk around. Last, but not least, stay on your horses. As long as you do that, you'll be fine. Any questions?”

  They all shook their heads. “Great. I'd appreciate if everyone would clear their dishes and give it a quick wash, that way we leave more time for Sam to do her cooking wonders,” he said with a smile as he picked his up.

  He winked at Amy when she walked past. He’d decided to leave all in God's hand and that meant living a normal life with Amy. And normal meant he wasn't going to bug her with his feelings. One time was enough; particularly since he couldn't do anything about it.

  Nothing had changed; she was his boss and he? Just another ranch hand.

  AMY HAD MADE UP HER mind that she'd do the right thing. Brooke hadn’t said anything to her good or bad. She didn't have to. Her hostility was palpable; Amy could’ve been one of Pharaoh's plagues. “Brooke, how are you doing?”

  She snorted, “Like you care.”

  “I do. I have no complaint against you.”

  “I do.”

  Amy chose to ignore her cocky attitude. “The name is Amy Jayden...”

  “Yeah, daug
hter of the ranch owner. I made it my business to know who you are. With you around, Nevada will not give me any attention.”

  Amy could tell her she shouldn't look to someone else for the source of her problems. Her plan was to try and be friendly, but this wasn't getting her anywhere. “I hope we can be friends.”

  Her lips turned down and she gave Amy a once over. “Hope all you want. You are my competition and I do not plan on being friends with you.”

  Amy waited debating what else to do. Brooke turned and made to go. “Suit yourself, then.”

  Amy turned to her horse just as Nevada made an appearance. He looked between her and Brooke, then changed direction towards them. “Did she say something to you?”

  “No, I just wanted to see if we could be friends. Don't take her to task. I was the one who approached her.”

  Nevada’s gaze bore into hers and she held it steady. He gave her that lopsided smile that had a way of melting her heart. “You have a good heart Amy, but not everyone is like you.”

  She nodded. Her efforts had been rebuffed. She made to get on her horse.

  “Hey, you need help?”

  “No, thanks.”

  Angel signaled to him. He smiled at her and rode away.

  Amy soaked in the peace and quiet of the early morning. The sun soothed her making her feel drowsy. Disappointment threatened to color her enjoyment as Brooke came into view but she pushed it away.

  She couldn't change who she was or what Nevada felt for her. She had yet to tell him he wasn't alone in his feelings. The time wasn't right. In singles and doubles, they rounded up the cattle and directed them to the pen where the veterinarian would look at them.

  She looked up and saw Nevada ride from the other group towards theirs. He looked tall and in control. Seest thou a man diligent in his works, he shall stand before kings and not mere men.

  Nevada was diligent, everything Sam had said about him Amy had observed for herself. Why would she not fall in love with him?