Keys and Kisses: Untouchable Book Three
Page 10
“It has to take cats,” Coop added, and Bubba gave a firm nod to that.
Frankie blinked, then looked at all of us, and I raised my brows. “We’re not leaving them behind.” Especially not after what her mother said about getting rid of them. I hadn’t been kidding about moving in with Frankie if I had to. Jeremy could free up the money for me. I’d pay her rent.
She wasn’t losing her cats or her place.
Fuck the bad meatloaf.
Her laugh and little squeal of delight were worth it, and we each got a hug. Even Bubba. The look on his face when she wrapped her arms around him…
Idiot needed to get his head out of his ass. I liked the guy, but I wasn’t waiting around for him.
“What actual homework do we have then?” Coop said. “Because if you want to get mini golf in, we need to eat, get the work done, then get changed and get out of here.”
“Actually,” Frankie said, perching on the arm of Bubba’s chair. “I got most of mine done at school. So I’ll go change, while you guys get caught up.”
Sneaky.
I liked it.
As soon as she was in the house and the door was closed though, I looked at Bubba. “Get it together and figure it out. Because if you screw this up for any of us—”
“Especially yourself," Jake tossed in there.
I nodded. “It won’t end well for anyone, especially Frankie.”
“She’s really my only concern,” was all Bubba said.
I really hoped he meant that.
“Good. Then we won’t have a problem.”
Chapter Seven
Songs to Lose and Love By
Mini golf rocked. We’d all gone back to Archie’s after for ice cream cake, and to be honest, I was both floating and exhausted. Ian’s behavior left me in a tangle of confusion. We weren’t dating, but he wasn’t leaving. During golf, he’d been reserved but very present. The other guys played and ribbed, but the comments between them grew a little more abrasive and cutting as the evening dragged on.
As determined as I’d been to have fun, it grew more difficult each time one of the guys gave me a hug or a kiss or a teasing remark, and Ian’s gaze would level at us. After we’d had ice cream cake and Jake offered to take me home rather than ride with Ian, I leapt at the offer. The speed at which I said yes got me a long look, and honestly, I hadn’t cared.
Ian made me tired. Coop didn’t ride with us, and Archie said he’d make sure he got home later. They were still playing on the Xbox. It wasn’t until I was in Jake’s SUV that I even gave a thought to the fact I’d blown Mom off.
“You okay?” Jake asked as he turned in the driveway to leave.
“Yeah,” I answered, not really wanting to dwell on anything that brought down the evening, even if I already was. “Just tired.” It was almost ten. “But I had a really good time.”
His grin warmed me right up. “Good, I’m glad. You deserved to have a good time.”
I laughed. “Is it weird that having fun felt weird?”
“Yes,” he said. “But it also felt a little bit like old times out there tonight. I hadn’t realized how much I missed all of us being us, even if Ian’s being a dick.”
“He’s not a being a dick,” I argued, even if I kind of agreed. I’d braided my hair when I went to get dressed, and it was mostly dry now after the evening, but I still needed to actually wash it when I got home.
“Yeah, he is,” Jake said, then rubbed my thigh. “But I’ll shut up about it.”
“Sorry,” I told him, covering his hand. “You don’t have to. I mean, it’s not like you aren’t entitled to an opinion.”
“Cool, then in my opinion, he’s being a dick.”
Laughing, I shook my head.
“What about you?” he asked quietly when we had to stop for a light.
“What about me what?”
“What do you think about him?”
“I don’t know what to think,” I admitted. “I’m not going to twist anyone’s arm, and he has a right to his opinions, too. I just…”
“You just?”
“I just don’t know what I did wrong.”
“You didn’t do a damn thing wrong, baby girl,” Jake assured me as he gave my thigh a squeeze. “This is him. He’ll figure it out. Even if I have to drop kick him.”
“Don’t fight, okay? You guys were scowling at each other off and on all night.”
“He’s pissing me off,” Jake said, then sighed. “But I’ll try, okay?”
That was a lot for Jake. “Thank you. Try to remember he’s your friend, too. This can’t be easy for anyone, and I’m being pretty selfish…”
“First,” Jake said, holding up a finger. “No, you’re not. Not a single one of us didn’t know the score when we asked you out.”
Technically…
“And second, anything worth it is never easy. We’ve had easy, Frankie. We had skating by and doing whatever we wanted. I wouldn’t trade this with you now for anything.”
Heat crawled over my face. I didn’t want to think about what having easy meant, or at least, not think about it too closely. “You know, technically, Ian asked me out first.”
“I know he did, baby girl. He slipped in there ahead of all of us…”
“He kissed me first, too.”
Jake pursed his lips but said nothing until he pulled into the apartment complex and parked. Mom’s car wasn’t in her slot, and relief sagged through me. ‘Course, it hadn’t been there before… Worried, I searched the lot, but I didn’t see any fancy cars like the BMW.
“Frankie…” Jake pulled my attention back to him, and I met his steady gaze. “Whether Bubba was your first kiss, or Coop met you first, or Archie got you in bed first—”
“Well…technically…”
He grinned. “Fine, technically that was me, but he was the first full intercourse you had.”
“Yes.” My face had to be on fire, yet at the same time, I didn’t look away from him.
“The fact is, we’ve all been your firsts in some ways. That doesn’t mean we get more…” He hesitated a beat, before he continued, “… say in what you do or don’t do. Bubba knew you were going out with us when he did the ask. He wanted Homecoming to be his first real date with you, and that’s weeks away and that was his choice.”
I licked my lips. “I know. Now he isn’t sure he wants to date because he thinks I need a friend more.”
“What do you think?”
“I think I want to date him, but I don’t want to force him to do something he doesn’t want to do. That isn’t right either. I like…I like all of us, even if it’s different. I don’t want to have to choose.” Even if I was going to have to at some point—I dreaded that nebulous day.
“Is he asking you to?” The intensity in Jake’s gaze trapped me. “Is that what Bubba wants?”
“That’s not what he asked me…” No, he’d explained about their points game. Glancing down at my hands, I bit my upper lip.
“You can tell me anything, baby girl. I mean it. If you don’t want to tell me, I’ll shut up.” He grimaced. “I won’t like it, but I’ll shut up.”
I laughed. “No you won’t.” I sighed. “You push me, and you’re too blunt to dance around the topic.”
“For you, I could try.”
“No, I’ve always liked that you won’t let me ignore things, even when I want to.”
It was hard to admit that. His expression gentled in the faint light cast by the dashboard. When he cupped my chin and brushed his thumb against my lower lip, he said, “You know, I’m going to remember that the next time you snap at me when I call you on pushing us away or not telling me something. You like it when I push. Got it. I can totally do that, too.”
Laughing, I leaned forward, and he met me halfway. The kiss was gentle and sweet. The gentle stroke of his tongue requested entrance, and I opened to him. When he settled his hand against my breast, I groaned, or maybe that was him. The weight of his fingers tugging at a nipp
le through the fabric sent languid heat spilling through me.
“God, I want to ask to come up and stay tonight,” Jake admitted in between kisses. “But I have to make an appearance at home, or Mom will get testy.”
“Wednesday?”
“Absolutely. Even if your mom is here. Maybe even definitely if your mom is here. You shouldn’t have to deal with her.”
Unfortunately, life wasn’t that kind. Another kiss, and I leaned back. “Thank you, Jake.”
“For?”
“Just for being you.” I covered his hand on my breast. “I’ll think about you when I curl up with my pillow.” It would still smell like him.
“Fuck,” he groaned, and leaned his head back. “Maybe I can text my mom…”
“Don’t,” I said. “We don’t want her to get mad at you, and it’s probably better we both get sleep because I doubt we would if you spent the night.”
“Not for a while, no,” he said with a smile. “And don’t think I haven’t noticed you didn’t really answer my question about what Bubba said.”
“I know, but I’m not sure I’m ready to talk about that with you yet. It feels personal.” It also included all of them and would likely start another fight. Maybe Ian didn’t need my protection, he’d certainly not acted like it this evening, but we were all friends, and all of those connections were important to me.
“Okay, baby girl. I’ll let you off the hook—but if that changes, you can tell me anything. I promise.”
“That goes for you, too, you know.” And while I’d like nothing more than to just sit here and make out for another half hour or more, he needed to go home and I needed to go inside. Shouldering my backpack, I smiled at him through the open door. “I’ll see you tomorrow?”
“Yes you will. I’ll text when I get home, but I’m going to wait until you’re inside. Text me if she’s there, okay?”
The ball of tension in my gut unraveled. “I will.”
I blew him another kiss before I closed the door. Once inside the apartment, I found it mostly dark and silent. Only the single light I’d left on in the kitchen burned.
Carefully, I made my way to Mom’s door and listened. Tiddles came trotting up the hallway, yowling his disdain. Okay. The cats were out. I texted Jake that all was well and I was alone.
Jake: Good deal. Talk to you when I get home.
In my bedroom, I put my backpack down and checked my other messages. Nothing from the guys, but then I hadn’t expected any. I’d spent the whole evening with them.
Nothing from Mom, either.
Well, maybe I wasn’t the only one who didn’t show up for her ordered appearance. My mom was not shy about letting me know when I’d pissed her off. Tory attacked my feet from under the bed as I tugged off my shoes.
I debated sending a text to the guys individually, but I was tired, and if I started chatting, we might be up for another hour. I really needed a shower and for Jake to let me know he was home, so I sent a message to the group chat that I was home and grabbing a shower, and that I’d probably crash right after that.
There was a litany of good nights and sweet dreams from Archie and Coop. But nothing from Ian.
Making a face, I dropped the phone on the bed and headed to the bathroom. It took me fifteen minutes to shower, wash my hair, and shave. One problem with dating, I had to keep up with the shaving. The guys hadn’t said anything, but it was the principle of the thing.
Hair blow-dried, teeth brushed, and pajamas on, I padded back to my room and dumped my dirty clothes in the laundry basket. I’d rinsed out the suit and left it hanging in the bathroom to dry.
Smothering a yawn, I checked my phone.
Jake: Home. Saw your message. Sweet dreams, baby girl. Wish I was there.
I grinned.
A second message also waited.
Ian: I’m sorry if I spoiled your evening. I really didn’t want that. I get that I’m confusing you, and I don’t want that either. Maybe we can talk more tomorrow? Sleep well, Frankie. I miss my muse.
His muse?
Me: We can definitely talk. I don’t like this distance either. I don’t like how it’s making me feel.
I debated whether to hit send on that, then added another line or three.
Me: I really like you, Ian. I hate the idea that you don’t trust me to decide what I want. Or who I want.
I almost added I need you and then backed that up before I hit send. I did need them. I needed all of them. But that was a step too far, considering how much crap spilling around me kept splashing onto them. Need implied a lot more. Particularly after admitting I’d missed them.
Ian: I trust you. I get that probably isn’t coming across. I just don’t know how much I trust the guys.
Me: They’re your friends.
Ian: I know. Maybe that’s why. I know them, F. I know them better than you think.
Me: What does that mean?
His response wasn’t immediate, and I took the time to climb into bed and shut off the lights. The cats immediately pounced, each one looking for their spot. The fact that Tiddles settled right on my chest and started purring made me smile.
This was another reason I loved my cats. They were always willing to cuddle, and they didn’t let me down. Mom could stand to take a few lessons.
Ian: It means when we’re all together and you’re not there, we’re not always the same guys you know.
Well, that wasn’t ominous or anything.
Me: Are they still your friends?
It was another long moment before he answered, but the three little dots told me he was typing.
Something.
For a while.
Maybe Ian was like me, writing something then erasing it because it was too much.
My eyes were getting heavier, but I wanted to know why yes or no was such a hard thing to type.
Ian: They are.
Well, that was pithy.
Me: Then maybe you should work this out with them, too?
Ian: I’m working on that. I really do like you. I want to be there for you.
Me: As a friend?
Ian: Yes.
Me: And if I want something more?
I chewed on my lower lip.
Ian: We’ll talk tomorrow. You should get some sleep.
Yeah. I sighed and closed my eyes. It wasn’t a no, but it wasn’t a yes. Okay. “That’s it,” I said aloud. “No more chasing. I want him to want me, but I’m not going to beg for it. We’re all mostly adults…” Well, technically Ian was the only adult, but Coop was getting there, and we were all turning eighteen—them this year and me in spring of next year. “Leave it, Frankie. If he wants you, he’ll figure it out.”
If he didn’t or if he couldn’t…well, maybe I shouldn’t be going to Homecoming with him.
That thought made my stomach hurt.
I totally didn’t switch the phone over to the songs he sent me, nor did I put them on repeat before I put the phone on a charger. I didn’t roll over on my side, and I definitely didn’t lie there thinking about how I could have handled it differently and how it was going to feel if Ian was well and truly out.
Because after tonight? If I was still dating the other three and not him, I didn’t see him hanging around much. Even if he wanted to, I didn’t know if the guys would want him there.
That part?
That sucked.
His songs? They had just enough love, loss, and longing in them to make me ache.
Another message blinked on the screen.
Ian: I care, Frankie. I know it doesn’t feel like I do. But I do care.
No, I didn’t have the wherewithal to respond to that, so I just swiped up to close the message and then burrowed against the pillow. It wasn’t curling up next to Jake, but it still smelled like him.
Morning came, and I was not in the mood for it. Sleep had been elusive as hell all night. Just when I’d start to go to sleep, I’d jerk awake. I kept replaying my conversations with Ian. Then the conversation
s with Jake, Coop, and Archie.
Maybe what we needed to do was all sit down and talk. I’d talked to them individually, and maybe that was a problem. Then again, we did talk about dates and stuff when we were altogether.
Well, not really.
We talked about who was doing what when. We parceled out the time to make sure I got to see everyone. Sometimes I saw Jake more than Archie, but I got to see Coop almost every day, and we hadn’t gotten to have a real date yet.
Ugh. Around and around, the thoughts raced on a gerbil wheel to nowhere. But every time I circled back, I realized, no, we had never sat down—all five of us—and discussed what we were doing.
Dread curled in the pit of my stomach.
Should I? Would that be asking for a massive problem?
Ian already had issues. Would this just make it worse? Or would it be what we needed to do? If I hadn’t unloaded on them that Saturday night about dating…
We’d probably not be dating at the moment.
I played out the debate in my head while I got dressed for school, fed the cats, cleaned out the litter box, and jogged down to check the mail that I’d been forgetting to check.
It was a stuffed box. I hurried back and sorted through the massive stack. There were some bills, most of which were autopays, I was pretty sure. Then there were envelopes addressed to the parents of, more college stuff, and three letters to me.
I separated those out and then carried the ones for Mom to her room. I kept the “To the Parents of”—she never wanted to read them anyway unless they were something important. Even if she hadn’t been home the night before, I knocked on the door anyway and waited.
When no sound was forthcoming, I let myself in.
The bed was a mess of rumpled sheets and blankets.