Carter's Devotion (Blackwater Bears Book 3)

by Lynn Howard

  Problem was, he was hard as a fucking rock now. And all it took was texting that minx. He tried his damnedest to think about something else, but all that filled his mind was June this morning when she’d walked around her living room stark naked. Her large tits swayed and bounced with each step, her ass jiggled when she’d turned. She looked good clothed, but she was unforgettable naked.

  His dick twitched in his boxers and he was pretty sure he’d die from blue balls. Reaching down, he released himself and wrapped a hand around his shaft. This time, he let memories of her body roll through his mind and fantasized about weighing those tits in his hands before sucking a dark pink nipple into his mouth.

  He pictured her lying on her back, her arms outstretched as she beckoned him down. He was dizzy as he came on his stomach, each jet making him grunt. If he came this hard by thinking about her, he could only imagine the fun he’d had last night.

  Unwilling to get out of bed, he grabbed the shirt he’d pulled off when he’d gotten into bed and cleaned himself off. Tossing it across the room toward the hamper, he rolled over and for a moment, he pictured June lying beside him, her dark chestnut hair fanned out on the pillow as she looked at him, her hands folded under her cheek. It wasn’t long before he fell asleep and dreamed of June Gillespie.

  When Carter finally woke, the sun was shining through the curtains he’d forgotten to pull closed. It was Sunday. He was off for the weekend. Which meant he had nothing to occupy his time. Or mind. He’d asked if he could call June today, but he hadn’t bothered to ask if she worked or what time he should call.

  It was too early right now. They’d texted until almost midnight and it was barely seven thirty. He’d let her get her beauty rest, not that she needed it. Well, she probably needed the rest, but she couldn’t get any more beautiful if she tried.

  What the hell was it about June that had him so mesmerized? She was gorgeous, sure. And her body was the kind of his dreams. But he’d seen beautiful women before. He’d slept with and had relationships with beautiful women. And he’d never found the need to find them, follow them around, and constantly rub himself against them to keep them covered in his scent.

  Maybe hanging around June was a bad idea. She’d asked if he was looking for a date or friends with benefits. He’d jokingly replied both, but really, he wanted to spend every second he could worshipping her body, doting on her, trying to make her giggle the way she’d done last night before they’d gotten drunk.

  That part, he remembered. She’d been so sure of herself at Moe’s. Then when they got back to her place, she’d gotten nervous and suggested playing strip Go Fish as an ice breaker. She’d been so funny, so fun. When it was his turn to remove a piece of clothing, he’d taken off his shirt, just like she had. And then her eyes got sad and she’d tried to cover herself from him. Something he was still trying to figure out: Why the hell did she cover herself after she’d seen him? She’d said something along the lines of him being built like a statue or some shit, but why should that matter? And why did she look so sad?

  A thought occurred to him. She’d said something about sleeping with him being an ego builder or boost or whatever. Was it possible she’d used him to get her confidence back after someone had hurt her?

  He’d let her feel his boner at the sight of her body; surely, she couldn’t think that was faked.

  His phone dinged beside him and made him start. Grabbing it, he squinted as his sleepy eyes tried to adjust. Aging sucked sometimes. Just because Shifters didn’t get sick didn’t mean they didn’t age, complete with deteriorating near vision.

  You sure about this?

  Carter blinked a few times. June the Minx. That was the name across his screen.

  Sure about what?

  Hanging out, she texted. We’ve already made a huge mistake. You sure you want to risk another?

  So many things ran through his mind as he looked at her text. Was he sure? Yes. And No. He was scared if he kept hanging out he’d do something even worse than marking her, like falling in love with her. He didn’t know if he wanted a serious relationship and was terrified of the mate bond. And at the same time, he couldn’t think of another person he’d rather have full time in his life.

  Even with the little that he knew about her, Carter knew she’d fit in perfectly with the rest of his Clan and friends. She reminded him so much of Emory from Big River, sassy and funny. She was curvy like Nova. But she was taller than every single woman, including Hollyn, Noah’s mate, who stood at five foot six-ish.

  It seemed he was talking himself into being with her. His bear was paying attention to the whole thing, pawing at his brain for a say.

  You already had a say and look what you did, he mentally told his bear.

  Just hang out. Maybe play cards. No Jager this time, he finally wrote back.

  When she didn’t reply for over five minutes, he set his phone down and threw his legs over the side of the bed. His body popped and cracked with every move. Elbows on his knees, he inhaled deep and willed his body to its feet. Even on his days off, Carter was sore. It was like his body never fully rested or healed or whatever. Or maybe as he was getting older, it was taking his body longer to heal from the damage. After the fight last year with the Fairy who’d been responsible for trying to kidnap Hollyn for sex trafficking, it’d taken him weeks to fully heal. He’d returned to work as a construction worker three days after. Probably wasn’t nearly enough time.

  Colton, on the other hand, seemed just fine. But he was still in his twenties. Noah got it. He was pushing forty himself.

  As Carter pulled a pair of jeans on, his phone chirped the most annoying sound in the world. He needed to change his fucking ring tone. He hated the factory setting.

  Yanking it from the bed, he realized it was June calling.

  “Hello?” he answered, aware his voice was a little scratchier than normal with sleep.

  “Just cards,” June said in that throaty, sexy voice of hers.

  “What?” Carter sat back on his bed and looked through the window overlooking the stretch of grass behind the cabins.

  “Just cards. Nothing else. I can’t…I can’t be your mate, Carter. I don’t even think I can do dating. Just cards.”

  Carter leaned forward, braced his elbow on his knee and rubbed his forehead. While it was a little early for this conversation, two things stuck out: she sounded panicked about being alone with him and she’d thought about him first thing in the morning.

  Had she done like he had last night and touched herself while thinking about him?

  He wouldn’t ask. At least not now.

  “Just cards. I was serious when I said I wanted to be friends. I had a lot of fun with you last night. I mean, before we got drunk and pretty much blacked out.” He chuckled and smiled wide when a feminine chuckle met his ears.

  “Are you busy tonight?” she asked and Carter’s heart tripled.

  He straightened. “Nope. What time?”

  “Six?”

  “Want me to bring some junk food? Or Chinese?”

  “Chinese food would be awesome. Orange chicken and a ton of crab Rangoon,” she said, then trailed off. “I mean, if you want. That’s a lot of food.”

  “Shoot. You should see how much I can eat. I’ll see you at six,” he said, gripping the phone tightly.

  “Okay…bye,” she said, her voice soft.

  “Bye.” He pulled the phone away once he heard the tell-tale sound of June ending the call and stared down at the blank screen.

  Just cards. No touching. No dating. No relationship crap. As long as neither of them got drunk, they should be able to control themselves. Should being the operative word.

  Could he do it? Could he keep his hands to himself? Could he avoid touching June, kissing her, rubbing himself against her?

  He had to. That was the only answer to those questions. He had to respect the fact she wanted to keep him in the friend zone. So, tonight would be about getting to know her more. Maybe in a week or s
o, he could introduce her to the rest of his Clan. Then Big River. Friends. They’d just be friends.

  Maybe he could talk her into wearing a potato sack when they hung out. Who was he kidding? He’d find her hot as hell in anything.

  He had about ten hours to kill until he headed over to House Springs to see June. He should’ve suggested earlier since he had to work tomorrow. His work days started pretty early, although now that it was getting cooler, they no longer started before the sun was up.

  No one should be up yet. Noah and Hollyn would wake up around nine so they could head to the bar. Shawnee had been taking most Sundays off to spend with Colton. That left Carter and Luke as the odd men out. As usual.

  Maybe he’d convince Luke to hit the streets with him for a while. Nah. Luke had been MIA so much lately. For the last few months, He’d had been disappearing for a few hours at a time, sometimes not even returning until dawn. The consensus was he had a woman he didn’t want his Clan to meet. But that didn’t feel right. If Luke had a woman, he’d want her to stay in his cabin, near his Clan, where they could all protect her. He was all about keeping females safe. Especially after Emory was attacked and he’d blamed himself for failing her.

  Carter looked around his room. His place could use a good cleaning. Grossly enough, it had been a few weeks since he’d last washed his sheets. And the sink full of dishes needed to go into the dishwasher.

  He got to work, cleaning, dusting, vacuuming, anything he could think of to make his place shiny. Hey. There was always a chance June would come to his house one day and he wanted to make sure it looked good.

  Checking out his work, he wondered if the place was too masculine for someone like June. The walls were the raw wood that made up the cabin. He’d never drywalled the place, just made sure the gaps between each were fully sealed. Besides, he liked his place a little on the cooler side.

  Would June be the kind of woman who got cold easily? Maybe he needed a few throw blankets for the couch.

  And then Carter pulled up short as he sat down to make a list. What the fuck was he doing? He’d just seriously gone full domestic with June in mind. He wanted to make his place perfect for a mate he’d claimed but couldn’t have. Partial lie. His bear had claimed her. But Carter couldn’t make himself mad about that.

  Pushing from the table, Carter pulled his shirt over his head and shoved his jeans to his ankles. He needed to Shift and run. Maybe even hunt. He needed to think about nothing but the woods and the ground beneath his paws.

  The second he was on his porch, he let his bear have his body, hurrying down the steps as his body began to pop and rearrange itself until huge paws hit the gravel. He shook his head and watched through his bear’s eyes as he surveyed his surroundings. Unlike his Clan brothers, Carter didn’t lose control of himself. His bear and him were pretty much one entity, but had their own thoughts. Until the night he’d marked June, he’d literally never lost himself to his beast.

  Trees passed in a blur, animals scampered out of his way and hid. He suddenly had no desire to hunt. He just wanted to run and run and run.

  Until Carter caught the direction his bear was running.

  Pushing to the front, Carter stopped his bear before he could get to the highway heading toward June’s.

  What the hell are you doing? he berated his bear. Shifters were twice the size of regular brown bears. No way would he go unnoticed. If he didn’t get shot by a hunter, he’d be filmed and reported everywhere.

  Mate. June. Mine.

  Oh fuck.

  Chapter Four

  June cleaned every square inch of her trailer. Which was stupid since Carter had already seen her place. Still. She didn’t want to look like a slob. And she’d made sure to throw the pillows and blankets they’d used as their floor bed into her bedroom. She didn’t want him to get any ideas.

  Why had she agreed to this? Friends? How the hell could they just be friends when they carried each other’s mark? And how the hell would she explain to anyone who ever saw the scar on her shoulder that she’d let a man she’d met that night permanently mark her? At least she hadn’t had to deal with Carol or Constance since that night.

  Did she smell different to other Shifters now? No. Of course not. The change in her blood only came when she was bitten by her true mate. So. No. She wouldn’t. Right?

  Once the whole place glittered like diamonds, she took a long, hot shower, taking time to shave her legs and her lady parts. She used her favorite apple body wash, perfect for this time of year. She’d applied a conditioning mask to her hair and finally rinsed it when she was smooth, clean, and smelled like a freaking orchard.

  She then spent time blow drying her waist long hair and applied makeup, accentuating her gray eyes and plumping her lips with clear gloss.

  June stared at her reflection. “What are you doing?” she asked herself. If she was determined to keep Carter in the friend zone, why the hell was she taking so much time to make herself sex ready? Why did she care about shaving or applying makeup?

  Nope. Friend…zone. She grabbed her favorite pair of lounge shorts and a tank top and yanked them on a little too aggressively. After all, it was the cotton’s fault she couldn’t make up her freaking mind. Glancing at herself in the door mirror, she shook her head. She needed a bra. If she let the girls bounce free, he’d get the wrong idea.

  She hated bras. She hated the way the weight of her boobs made the straps dig into her shoulders. But it was worth it if it reminded her to control her damn libido.

  Five thirty. He’d be there within a half an hour. Unless he was one of those people who were always fashionably late. Personally, she hated to be any later than five minutes early. It made her anxious, otherwise.

  June sat on the couch, crossed her legs, uncrossed them, then stood again. She paced her living room. Oh. She forgot to get the cards out. Crossing the space between her couch and the kitchen, which was no more than eight feet, she grabbed the stack of cards they’d used two nights ago from the top of the fridge.

  Holding them in her hands, flashes of that night played in her mind like a movie reel. The smiles. The laughing. Pieces of clothing disappearing one by one. Then the memories got fuzzy. She’d had so much fun even before they’d started pawing at each other. No reason they couldn’t have fun tonight. Right?

  Sitting at the table, June gripped the box of cards in her hands like a life line and did her best to keep her mind clear. He’d smell her arousal the second he walked in the door if she didn’t. And she was doing her best to just be friends. Friends. Friends. Friends. If she kept repeating it to herself, maybe her freaking animal would believe her and keep her fangs to herself.

  The hard knock on the door made June jump with a squeal. Standing on wobbly legs, she headed to the door, turned back around and set the deck of cards on the table, then did a shuffle jog to let Carter in. He was ten minutes early. She liked that.

  June pulled the door open and couldn’t help the smile that stretched across her face when he held up two huge paper bags with so much yumminess. She could already smell the chicken fried rice and her mouth watered.

  “I got a little extra. Just in case,” he said with a wink as he just sort of invited himself in. Like a friend would do. Neither Carol nor Constance even knocked anymore; they had a spare key and let themselves in anytime they wanted. Good thing they’d known she’d taken Carter home that night or they might’ve walked in on a real life porn scene.

  Then again, at least someone would have recollection of what occurred. Not that she wanted her friends to see her in that position ... or Carter. A slight anger rose up her spine at the thought of either Constance or Carol seeing her mate without clothes. No; she did not just think that. Carter was not her mate; he couldn't be

  He set the bags on the table and then began to pull the containers out, setting them side by side before turning to her. “Plates?” he asked.

  She pointed to the cabinet behind him and checked out the variety on the table. She
’d totally wanted more than she’d asked for, but with her size, she was sometimes embarrassed eating in front of people. Apparently, he either didn’t care or had a huge appetite himself because her orange chicken sat amongst a container of General Tso’s, two large cartons of chicken fried rice, two bags of crab Rangoon, and eight egg rolls. She was suddenly starving.

  Carter brought over two plates while June stepped back into the kitchen to grab some forks.

  “I didn’t get any drinks,” Carter said, turning to her with wide eyes like he was sorry.

  “I’ve got soda, juice, or beer,” she offered. And a brand new bottle of Jager, but that was staying in the freezer.

  “Soda,” he said. And was that a blush? Yep. His cheeks had definitely turned pink. He was making sure to avoid the alcohol so they wouldn’t have a repeat of the incident.

  June grabbed two cans out of the fridge and sat one in front of him. He’d situated the plates so they were next to each other instead of across from each other. Which meant Carter would be all in her space while she shoveled food into her mouth.

  Carter leaned forward to grab the General Tso’s and June got a whiff of him. Oh crap, he smelled good. That manly, spicy soap men used, fabric softener, and something unique to just Carter. It was a woodsy, warm smell and she wanted to bury her face in his chest and inhale deeply.

  “You okay?” he asked. He’d sat and was frowning up at her.

  “Yep. Fine. Just dandy,” she said a little too quickly and a little too loudly. His frown deepened, but she tried to ignore it and began to pile food onto her plate. “I love Chinese food,” she moaned after she’d sat down and taken a bite of the orange chicken.

  When Carter didn’t say anything, June glanced over at him. His eyes were glued to her lips and they held a light glow. Shit. She had to find a way to guide him back to friend land.

  “Do you like sports?” she asked when she couldn’t think of anything else.