by Alison Mello
“The last couple of days, I have fought the feelings and emotions inside. Gruesome emotions that left a huge void within me. It’s selfish of me to want you here when you suffered so much to the end. I witnessed you wither and slip away, and there was nothing I could do to stop it. I was helpless, and I failed you. Your end was unfair and underserved.
“I remember the day you walked into my life like it was yesterday. I knew in that moment when I stared into your beautiful hazel eyes that you were made for me. I fell in love with you, and I didn’t even know your name or the sound of your voice. When I did, my heart was rewarded. I wanted nothing but to protect you, but it turned out I needed protection, and you were the angel that was sent to my aid. I miss your laughter, your touch, your kisses, and the silly little jokes you told to brighten my day. You gave me a second chance in life when the world had turned its back on me. You showed me how it was to be loved, to be cherished, and to belong. You blessed me in so many ways I was unable to express to you when you were here, and for that I am remorseful. The night you left me, I knew before I was told. A piece of my soul died with you. I thought my love would be enough to keep you here. It wasn’t. You are loved by many, more than you thought. You should see the people here to mourn you today. You were a beautiful soul, and the heavens are blessed to have you. I love you. I always will. It is not over, not by a long shot. You will always reside in my heart. Until we meet again, my angel. Rest well.”
He touched his lips with his fingertips and blew a kiss at her casket before descending the short staircase. There were a few sniffles and tears from the crowd as he made his way to his seat. William gave him a nod, regret permanently carved into his visage. Corey squeezed his shoulder to comfort him.
When the service was over, Zachary joined the pallbearers to carry the casket. William pitched in, and they carried her safely to the waiting hearse. After the hearse was dispatched to the cemetery, he used the time to greet and thank the guests.
“It’s a difficult day.”
He turned around to meet Mavis’s eyes and a group of women standing behind her. She extended her hand for a shake, and he took it, bowing as a sign of respect.
“It was a beautiful ceremony. She was indeed blessed.”
Zachary nodded. “She deserved it.”
“These are some of the women she touched with her beautiful spirit.”
One of the women, a slim lady who looked to be in her forties, walked around Mavis and took his hand. “She was a good person. I am pleased to have met her.”
“You stayed in the shelter with her?” he asked.
“Yes, roommates actually. I helped her get accustomed on her first night.” She shied away. The pain in Zachary’s eyes was too much for the lady to bear.
“Thank you,” he said.
Another woman stepped forward. “I am sorry for your loss. All our loss. Courtney was kind, gorgeous, and an angel among us.”
“These women have a home now because of her,” Mavis said. “A chance to start afresh and we will forever be grateful. We should keep in touch. I’ll extend an invitation to you for the opening of the center in a few months. God bless you, Zachary. You did well by her.”
Astonished by all the compassionate words, he simply nodded at the women.
“Hey, you ready?” Corey asked.
“Yeah.”
William nodded at him through the window of a black car as he drove away from the church. Zachary responded with a stiff nod. His attitude was not directed at him; he’d been more than a great friend to him since her passing. It was toward William’s family. They were terrible people who played a major part in her grief. If he’d learned one thing about life, it was that everything happened for a reason, good or bad.
***
His hands clasped in front of him, Zachary stared down in his dark sunglasses as the casket was lowered into the ground. Words couldn’t express how he felt. Traumatized, perhaps.
“For as much as it has pleased our Heavenly Father in His wise providence to take unto Himself our beloved Courtney Greene Peterson, we therefore commit her body to the ground, Earth to Earth, ashes to ashes, dust to dust, looking for the blessed hope and the glorious appearing of the great God in our savior Jesus Christ who shall change the body of our humiliation and fashion it anew in the likeness of His own body of glory according to the working of His mighty power wherewith He is able even to subdue all things unto Himself,” the reverend read as the casket lowered into her final resting place.
A sense of grief grabbed him like an icy hand. His body trembled lightly. A firm hand rested on his shoulder, soothing him.
“Here.” William, tears running from his eyes, passed a white tulip to him.
“Thanks.” Zachary accepted it and crouched down. He stared at the grave for a long moment before tossing the tulip onto the casket. He stood up, fixed his posture, and walked away without turning back.
CHAPTER 40
Even the darkest night will end and the sun will rise.
~Victor Hugo
24 Months Later…
He leaned forward, gazing at the ground. He wore a dark suit. His appearance was clear and striking. He performed completely different from how Dr. Bailey Clark was used to seeing him. Not in his usual ball cap, faded jeans, and t-shirt. She sat across from her client, awestruck by the transformation. His eyes were bright, responsive, and vibrant, not dulled by redness due to lack of sleep or recovering from a night of drinking, no bruises on his knuckles from a bar fight. He was impeccable. She almost started to doubt it was the same man she’d first met.
“Mr. Reid, I must say, I was pleased to receive your call. It’s been what…?”
He grinned. “Two years too long.”
“You look well.” She crossed her legs and placed a notepad on her lap.
“I feel well.”
She smiled and with a nod pulled the pen from the notepad and rolled it between her fingers. “So tell me, what has been going on?”
He shrugged and leaned back into the couch. “That’d take more than the paid hour.”
“We can start from somewhere.”
“Alison and I remarried.”
Dr. Clark glanced up from her notepad. She’d made a mental note to inquire about his personal life when she spotted his wedding band. She narrowed her eyes at him, confused by the chain of events leading to this different Zachary Reid before her.
“The last time we talked, you were separated and, if I can recall correctly, finalizing the divorce. You had moved on with…” She flipped through notes.
“Courtney.”
“I’m sorry, yes, Courtney. It didn’t work out? You seemed happy with her.”
“I was.” He cleared a lump in his throat. Even though days, weeks, months, and a couple of years had passed, the bruise remained as raw as it did the day she took her last breath. His heart always skipped a couple of beats and ached at the thought of her. “She passed.”
Stunned, Dr. Clark stayed mute for a brief moment, then said, “I am sorry to hear that.”
In a moment of short silence, he mourned his loss, grateful for her sacrifice.
“Do you mind if I ask what happened?”
“Cancer. She was an amazing woman. She breathed life into me when I was dead. I was a waste and a loser. She appeared from nowhere, and I sit before you a changed man because of her. She was in remission, but sadly the cancer returned. Took her away.” He motioned with a casual sweep of his arm. “I made her a promise on her deathbed to return to my family and not run from my responsibilities as a husband and father. I owed my kids to make it work between their mother and me, and I did just that.”
“You are with Alison only for that reason?”
His posture tensed. “No. Initially it was, but I didn’t go in blind. Neither did Alison. We put all our cards on the table. I came clean, especially about Courtney, and how much I loved her, what she meant and will continue to mean to me. It was a lot to deal with. I hurt her, I know th
at, and I plan to make it up to her for as long as I live. The loss, the hurt, the betrayal…I shouldn’t be seated before you. I should be in the grave, gone with my shame, yet here I am. I am truly humbled. I found my way through the grief, and now I live a good life.”
“I must say, I am completely lost for words. I am proud of you,” Dr. Clark said. “I was against the idea of you rushing into a relationship as fast as you did, but look how it turned out. You faced some of life’s difficult trials and came out a victor. Courtney sounds like an amazing woman.”
“She was.”
“How about work? You mentioned going into business with a few former mates the last time we spoke.”
“It’s going great. Very lucrative. Even better than projected.”
“You seem to be doing great. You don’t need me.”
“I beg to differ.” He leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees. “I have this fear, and it’s called failure. My nightmares are recurring. Not as frightening as they used to be, no, though disturbing enough to pull me back to that dark place. I wake up in a fright, fearing I am about to destroy all the good things in my life I have worked so hard for. I never want to go back to that place.”
“Your life is on a positive path now. There are certain acts that pulled you into that place. The past is something you can’t control. You had a substance abuse problem, which was how you dealt with the pain. So let me ask you this: do you actively visit the bars like you used to?”
“No, I don’t. That’s in the past. That ended when I met Courtney. I didn’t need alcohol to deal with my past. I needed her, her love, her patience…”
Well, except the night she decided to forgo any more treatment.
But that was the last time he drank excessively.
“What was it about Courtney that brought you so much hope? What did she do differently from Alison?”
“She listened. She understood. Sometimes I didn’t need to use words to express myself. She just knew. It was a natural flow, not forced or pretentious.”
“And you think Alison was?”
He glanced away from her, staring at the wall, trying to find the right words to differentiate the two women without slandering her character.
“We love each other. I don’t for a second doubt her love for me. Alison just has a different way of showing it. She’s consumed with her career and the kids. It’s just a lot for her to fully commit to me, and I get it. It’s not easy. Courtney made me realize that I was greedy in my marriage. I made it all about me and what I went through and what I needed to survive. I failed to accommodate anyone else. I failed to see things from Alison’s point of view. Her struggles, fears, and doubts. Once I altered my perception, I started to see things differently. And we talk, a lot more than we ever did. I criticized her for never listening. I never listened to her, either. Now we both make the effort to brace each other’s concerns.”
“You shouldn’t give in to your fears. It embitters and curtails the days. I think you are doing a great job. The dreams are normal. The brain is a funny tissue. If your belief is set to ‘I am happy,’ the brain performs better. Your fear is in here,” she tapped her chest over her heart, “and that carries negativity to the brain. It produces dreams, nightmares that are nonfactual. It’s all about your attitude. Stay positive, and everything else will fall into place. I’d prefer to keep you away from any sort of medication. You are on the right path. You just need to accept your new reality. It’s a beautiful one.”
“Sounds easier said than done.”
“It is easy. Believe in your abilities and know you deserve all the good life has to offer.”
“You’re right, I guess. Sounds like the words of Courtney Greene.”
“Courtney Greene?” Dr. Clark looked surprised.
“Yeah.”
“Is she by any chance responsible for the newly built Courtney Greene Center for Women and Children?”
“She was.” His face beamed with pride.
“Oh my, that’s remarkable. I’ve recommended the center to a few people. It’s a beautiful place. I have heard nothing but praises.”
“She was kind.”
The center had opened almost a year ago, and it was nothing short of Mavis’s vision. They housed over a thousand women seeking shelter and created job placements and high school and college programs to help women who found themselves caught between freedom and the demons that pull them astray. The opening day was incredible. Zachary donated a few of Courtney’s paintings, and they were displayed in the foyer for all to admire. William stayed true to his word and participated in the opening, as well as donating a sizeable amount of money in Courtney’s name. It had been a remarkable journey for not just Zachary, but the people who came in contact with Courtney in the past.
“I see that now.”
Zachary glanced at the clock and stood up. “Thank you, Dr. Clark. I’ll keep in touch if that is okay?”
“You are welcome anytime.” She accompanied him to the door and asked, “How are your children?”
Zachary grinned. “They are great. Three now.”
“Wow, congratulations!”
“Yeah, we had a girl. Courtney Raine Reid.”
About the Author
Born and raised in Accra, Ghana and now living in Cincinnati, Ohio. A banker, wife and mother of two amazing kids. She finds writing to be a great passion of hers and a path she was born to follow. She began by writing short stories at a young age but deviated from the plan. Now, she has three published books and working on a few more projects. Besides writing, she’s a crazy tea lover, loves to travel, eat, and enjoys learning about different cultures. Authors she is inspired by are James Patterson, Nora Roberts and Sarah Pinborough. Hope you enjoy her books as greatly as she enjoyed producing them.
Books by Frances Paul
Life Intertwined:
A Moretti Crime Family Novel Book 1
Unraveled: A Moretti Crime Family Novel Book 2
Clandestine Affaire
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