How NOT to Summon a Demon Lord: Volume 4

by Yukiya Murasaki

  There were two girls around the bed: an Elf, and a Pantherian.

  The Elf came over to Lumachina. She had a profoundly ample bust, but judging from her long ears and facial features, she was most definitely an Elf.

  “She woke up! Thank goodness.”

  “...Are you all right? We healed the cuts on your legs, but is there anything else that hurts?”

  The Pantherian’s ears, tail, and hair were all black, a rarity among the species. She was looking at Lumachina with an expression of concern on her face.

  “Huh? Ah, um...”

  They weren’t just good-looking, but cute as well. However, Lumachina was concerned about the iron rings around their necks, which were most likely slave collars.

  “...Are your memories mixed up? Can you tell me your name?” the Pantherian girl asked uneasily.

  “My name is...” The fog in her head rapidly cleared. “Ah, Lumachina Weselia. It’s all right, I remember.”

  “...That’s good. My name is Rem Galleau. I am a Pantherian, as you could probably tell, and an Adventurer as well.”

  “I’m Shera, and I’m an Elf!”

  “...I know this is short notice, Lumachina, but there are a many things we want you to explain to us... But before that, there is a very important question I must ask.”

  Rem’s expression was exceedingly serious, which caused Lumachina to get nervous. “Wh-What could that be?”

  “...Did Diablo do anything weird to you? Specifically, did he touch you in weird places, or pinch you, or lick you...or use his fingers to, um...” Rem blushed as she spoke, her voice becoming smaller and smaller.

  Lumachina’s face began burning up as well. She remembered quite clearly how she was saved while being almost completely naked.

  “W-Would Diablo happen to be the god who saved me? If so, I can swear that he did not perform such...i-impure taboos with me...” She was unconscious at the time, but she was positive God would never do something like that to her.

  Rem let out a deep sigh of relief. “...Thank goodness.”

  “Ahaha! It was a big shock when Diablo came in carrying you, Lumachina. We thought he attacked you or something!”

  “...I thought it wasn’t possible for him...but since he wouldn’t outright deny it, I was worried that something had happened.”

  “Sometimes, Diablo will just say nothing but ‘yeah’ and stuff.”

  “...It does seem like there are times he does not like to speak, much to our chagrin.”

  This time Lumachina tried asking a question. “Um... What kind of relationship do you have with God?”

  “...What do you mean by ‘God’? Are you talking about Diablo?” Rem asked to confirm.

  Lumachina nodded. “He is the one who saved me.”

  “Mm, I guess you could say Diablo is kind of like our owner,” Shera said as she touched her collar.

  “What!? God keeps slaves!?”

  “No, you’ve got it all wrong! This isn’t a ‘slave collar,’ it’s an ‘enslavement collar.’ Erm, let’s see... When Rem and I tried summoning a Demon Lord at Starfall Tower, our magic was bounced back at us, and...”

  She was doing her best to explain everything, but Lumachina didn’t really understand what was going on.

  Rem stepped in and summarized everything for her: “Diablo is the leader of our party of Adventurers, and our friend.”

  “I...see.”

  —God is their friend? And an Adventurer?

  She wanted to confirm, just to be sure. “Um... So this ‘Diablo’ is God, correct?”

  “...He’s an Elemental Sorcerer, one so strong that his power goes beyond all common sense.”

  “He always says he’s a ‘Demon Lord from another world.’”

  “G-God has to be the one who saved me... It’s a problem for me if he isn’t...” Lumachina cradled her head in her hands.

  “...And why is that?” Rem asked, tilting her head.

  “Because...he saw my skin...” Lumachina muttered, blushing furiously.

  “...And?”

  “We usually show our skin around him, so—” Rem quickly smacked Shera for blurting such details.

  There was one thing that Lumachina had always decided upon in her heart: “The only person you should show your skin to is the man who will become your spouse.”

  “...What?”

  “That’s why, if this ‘Diablo’ is not God...then I have no choice but to become his wife.”

  Rem’s tail shot straight up. “What in the—!? What is this naked cape-girl getting all carried away for!?”

  “Th-That’s right, there’s an order for these things! Like, I would be first in line, right!?”

  “Huh!? What do you mean by that!? You two are only his party members, no!?”

  Rem averted her gaze. “...That’s right.”

  “W-Well...maybe? But I feel like Diablo likes ’em bigger, you know?” Shera said, lifting up her chest with both hands.

  As they were talking, who else but Diablo would walk into the room.

  †

  The ones in the room at the moment were Diablo, Rem, Shera...and Lumachina, who was keeping herself propped up in the bed. Since they weren’t sure what the story behind Lumachina was, Diablo had gone to tell Klem and Edelgard not to leave their room, but since it was nighttime, they were already asleep. Eat, sleep, and play; the two Fallen really were living the easy life. It was enough to make him jealous.

  Diablo kept the panic raging inside him from showing on his face.

  —Just what does she mean she has to become my wife!?

  He could hear their voices leaking out into the hallway, so he ended up eavesdropping on them. This was a girl who asked him if he was God while naked, and was apparently being hunted by Paladins.

  —No matter how much of a stunningly beautiful girl she is, let alone the fact I’ve seen every last nook and cranny of her body... Oh man... Having her as a wife might be a bit of a problem for me...

  Diablo grit his teeth to avoid becoming slack-jawed.

  —No, no, life is more important right now.

  It wouldn’t be a problem if it was only the one Paladin he was dealing with, but if more were to join forces and band together, then his outlooks were a bit more hazy. At the very least, he knew them to be stronger than the Adventurers in Faltra or the Elven army he had faced. There were mechanics implemented in Cross Reverie that compensated for one-versus-many fights, but there probably weren’t any saving graces like that in this world. He had even gotten involved with Saddler’s death, who was himself a Paladin...

  To put it simply, he wanted to avoid any kind of confrontation with the Church, seeing as they had power that rivaled even the king of this country.

  —There’s no benefit to doing that! Like, none at all! ...That said, I guess I can at least hear what she has to say. It’d be a little sad to drive her out of the inn without doing at least that much.

  Arms folded, Diablo leaned against the wall as he looked down at Lumachina. “It seems you have finally come to.”

  “Yes. Thank you again for coming to my aid... Um, Diablo... You are a god, right?”

  —It’s not really normal to think that God themselves came to save you. I don’t know just how deep your faith runs, but just thinking God will save you because you prayed to him? I mean, come on... Just try writing that on Tw***er, I dare you. People would treat you like a stupid troll account in no time.

  But in more ways than one, it would be bad to shut her down like that now. It seemed like she was under the impression she had to marry anyone who saw her naked, as long as they were one of the races.

  —She doesn’t look like she’s a kid anymore...but maybe she’s a huge yokel? Does she think babies come from the stork, or that they grow in cabbage patches or something?

  She was undeniably cute, so much so that if she were to actually confess to him back in the real world, he would think it was some kind of marriage fraud scam. However, he didn’t sense any kind of da
nger from this. So he put his plan to avoid all this into action:

  “Due to certain circumstances, I am choosing not to reveal my identity while here in this world. Presume whatever you will as to why.”

  With a gasp, Lumachina’s eyes opened wide, and she scrambled to get down from the bed. Her legs were still wrapped in bandages, so he thought she shouldn’t push herself that hard. She then knelt down on the floor.

  “Please, allow me to refer to you as Lord Diablo.”

  “V-Very well!”

  This way, he could avoid being called “God” all the time while also dodging the “Marriage END” route.

  Rem stayed quiet, seemingly having caught on to Diablo’s intentions. Shera, on the other hand, tilted her head. She looked pretty unsure about what was going on.

  Lumachina now appeared to believe Diablo was a God who was hiding his true identity.

  He tried questioning her again. “Lumachina...why were you being pursued by a Paladin? Judging by what happened, I assume surely it was not because you are a Demon Lord worshiper?”

  The words caught in Lumachina’s throat. Whatever it was, it seemed hard for her to talk about.

  “...It’s for your own good to talk about any secrets as soon as possible. If not, something could happen to you that you won’t forget for as long as you live,” Rem said softly.

  She was most likely referring to how Diablo attacked her ears in order to find out her secret. Diablo would never forget the voices she made that night as long as he lived, either.

  It was unknown how Lumachina interpreted that, but she nodded. “Right, it is no use keeping secrets from Lord Diablo, after all.”

  “...If it’s hard for you to talk about, should we go wait outside?”

  “No, on the contrary. If you are friends who Lord Diablo has placed his faith in, then I would be grateful for you to hear this as well.”

  “Oka~y!” Shera threw both her hands in the air.

  “...It seems like quite the complicated affair,” Rem said with a nod.

  Staying silent, Diablo indicated for Lumachina to continue. Standing up from the floor, Lumachina clasped her hands together. A light came into existence by her chest, with a dazzling brightness spreading throughout the dim room. What appeared was the sacred symbol, the same kind often seen at churches or elsewhere. It was a radiant, almost blinding pure white.

  “I occupy the most paramount position in the Church: I am the High Priest.”

  Rem’s eyes turned round. “...High Priest!? You mean the highest position in the Church!?”

  Shera was making small, strange noises out of bewilderment.

  “...I heard they were a young woman, b-but that is you!?”

  “The real deal!?”

  “Yes,” Lumachina said, nodding.

  Keeping his arms crossed, Diablo slowly nodded as well. He made it seem like he knew all along, but on the inside he was so surprised it felt like snot would start dripping from his nose.

  —I get it now! So that’s why she thought God had come to save her! I guess that’s just how important the position she holds is.

  “...W-Wait. According to what we heard from Diablo, you were being pursued by a Paladin, correct?” Rem asked.

  “Yes, that is correct.”

  “...That can’t be... Paladins only follow the will of the Church, which means they should follow your will as the High Priest. How can that be?”

  Vexed, Lumachina bit her lip. “Unfortunately, I do not possess that kind of influence. There is a group called the Cardinal Authority who have complete control over the Church. They are comprised of the head cardinal and six other cardinals who are selected by the High Priest...or at least, that is how it should be. Really, the ones who decide the candidates are the cardinals themselves.”

  “...So the ones who actually have influence over the Church are these cardinals, then.”

  “While I have been granted all the authority that comes with the position of High Priest, it is the Paladins who possess absolute military might, and all of them follow the orders of the Cardinal Authority.”

  Even if one did have power, it seemed there was no point to it if they couldn’t get anything done.

  Rem nodded. “...That explains why a Paladin was after your life.”

  “It does appear the Cardinal Authority has decided to eliminate me.”

  “...What exactly happened?”

  Lumachina placed a finger on her lip as she thought. It was an almost childlike gesture. “Mmm... Could it have been because I inquired about a possible illicit flow of money and goods being used for the patronage of church rites? Or perhaps it was because I gave the order to look into the rumors of improper conduct by Paladins? Or maybe, was it because I made a proposal that prohibited priests from employing other people they knew through personal connections?”

  “...Those are all certainly things that cannot be overlooked... But did you receive any sort of warning before they began making attempts at your life?”

  “I did. Some of the cardinals indirectly... No, they made it quite clear they were threatening me.”

  “...And even then, you didn’t do as they said.”

  “I cannot turn a blind eye to such wrongdoings.”

  —That’s a strong sense of justice she’s got there. Seems like she’s the kind of person who values morals more than their own life. But as a result, she was almost killed... This girl is an idiot, an unmistakable idiot... And yet, I don’t hate that about her.

  Rem nodded. “...What you are saying is correct, Lumachina, which is most likely why these people are after your life. We live in a society where it’s hard to do the right thing, after all.”

  “That is why I have decided to do something about it on this expedition.”

  “...Expedition?”

  “Yes. Rumors have been spreading of the Demon Lord having been resurrected in Faltra. In order to put the minds of the people at rest, I decided to come to the city as a sort of ‘visit from the High Priest.’”

  “Th-The resurrection of the Demon Lord? Something like that would nev—”

  “—Did happen, yeah.” A smile on her face, Shera spilled the beans and finished the sentence, causing Rem to kick her square in the butt.

  Lumachina cast her eyes downward. “Faltra has been hit by one bout of turmoil after the other, and I am worried about those who live there... But there is a different reason as to why I have taken action now.”

  “...And what reason would that be?”

  “My goal is to travel to a town in the former Demon Lord’s territory, and report what is going on to Batutta, the captain of the Paladins.”

  Rem looked off in the distance as if she were remembering something. “...I have heard of Batutta before. He was supposed to be an influential presence in the Great Human-Fallen War, and a man of great integrity.”

  “That is what I have heard as well. Half a year before I was made the High Priest, Batutta was sent to the former Demon Lord’s Domain.”

  “...Just as they came for your life, could they have also banished him to that remote city?”

  “I believe that to be the case. If I can inform him of what is going on within the Church, I am sure he will take action and protect me—or at least, that is what another Paladin, Tria, told me.”

  “...Is this person someone you can trust?”

  “If she hadn’t helped me...then, in this very moment, I would be...”

  “...Where is Tria now?”

  “She protected me from another Paladin, to save me... And then...” Tears welled up in the corners of Lumachina’s eyes, and her shoulders began to shake.

  “O-Oh, I see...” Rem was at a loss for words.

  Shera was moved to tears. “That’s so sad, something like that happening to such a good person... You don’t need to worry anymore, Lumachina! We’ll protect you for sure!”

  “...There you go again, saying whatever you like... But it is true that we can’t leave you alone.”

>   Both of the girls seemed intent on helping Lumachina.

  —Was there anything suspicious about her story just now? Were there any contradictions? Couldn’t she just have written a letter to this Captain Batutta guy?

  ...No, there would be no point to that. As long as the Cardinal Authority was in control, Lumachina would eventually be killed at their hands. Running away took precedent over relaying what was going on. In that case, were there any other ways?

  “Can you not rely on the country for anything?” Diablo asked. “It’s true the Paladins are strong, but there are skilled people in the military as well.”

  According to his own analysis, Galford, the governor of Faltra, was somewhere around the level 110 mark. Paladins like Saddler and Gewalt were definitely strong, but they didn’t give off the feeling they had broken through their limits yet. That would make them around level 99 or lower.

  Lumachina had a troubled look on her face. “I am not aware of the internal affairs of the Church, and do not have even the slightest idea of what could be happening in the royal court. If the person I went to for help was actually connected with the Authority...”

  Shera leaned forward. “Can that actually happen!? I mean, they’re bad people, right!?”

  “...Those in power who act corrupt tend to have money saved up,” Rem said with a sigh. “As long as they get paid, there are also quite a lot of people willing to support this corruption.”

  “That’s unforgivable!”

  Rem seemed like she wanted to say something to the indignant Shera, but she got back on topic. “...It’s only natural Lumachina would be anxious about all this, and I can certainly understand why.”

  “Hm.” Diablo nodded.

  He wasn’t sure what kind of position people like Galford or Sylvie took when it came to the Church. In fact, he even thought it was obvious for someone to support the side that has money and power. If there was anyone who would take care of this High Priest (in name alone), they would have to be a person of exceptionally profound faith.

  †

  “...What are you planning to do now, Lumachina?” Rem asked. “If the Paladin who attacked you doesn’t return to the capital, then the cardinals will most likely think the assassination was a failure. They might make another attempt on your life again.”