The Satyr

by Tiana Laveen

  “Why of all things would that be an issue? I’m not a magical human being. I didn’t just appear out of thin air. I’ve been dating Yasmine for several months now.” The woman stared with wide eyes, then burst out laughing, shaking her head. It wasn’t humor; more a sound of disbelief.

  “Okay, very well. Next point. I am quite close to all of my children. However, Yasmine and I are especially close. Now she is a grown woman and I have no interest in telling her who to be with, or any of that other foolish malarkey. My role as her mother, and now her friend since she is an adult, is to help vet good people, separate them from the bad people. My daughter, in my opinion, is sometimes too quick to give others the benefit of the doubt, though she’s definitely improved in that arena. She’s an amazing catch. She’s financially secure. She’s confident and beautiful. You know it. I know it.”

  “Yes, she is.”

  “She’s an excellent catch. I’m not going to waste my time having a discussion with you, asking you questions that center around your intent because first of all, I know you are far too slick, too clever, and probably too duplicitous to give me the wrong answers. You’d likely want to tell me what I want to hear.” He smirked. “I base that on how you were able to get my child, and your occupation. I know you are an attorney, and a successful one, too. I also know that my daughter has been behaving a bit differently since she announced to us, or admitted I should say, that she was seeing someone and it was more than just casual dating.”

  “How would you say she’s changed?” Curiosity filled him, a selfish need to delve into the ways in which he’d altered such a magnificent female specimen.

  “I would prefer to keep that to myself. The point is, she is acting a bit differently. Now, maybe this behavior was always in her. She just needed someone to coax it out, and though I don’t know everything about you, I can look into those beautiful dark blue eyes of yours and tell that you are slick as hot snot, but my daughter is slick, too. You have met your match, so I hope you brought plenty of tissue.” At this, he burst out laughing. “She is not one to railroad. Play with. Try to run over.” He casually looked down at his Rolex watch.

  “Oh, am I boring you?”

  “Not in the least. I am just waiting for this party, which I was invited to, to start. I could’ve sworn I just left the courtroom, and yet, boom! The magically appearing man outta nowhere is being interrogated once again but I’m sorry, continue!” He laughed again, getting off on her facial expression.

  The woman put her hand on her hip and appeared to be trying with all of her might to not burst out laughing, too. As quickly as he registered it, she tossed on a stern expression and glared at him.

  “May I finish with what I was saying without you interrupting now?”

  “Of course, of course.” He waved her off. “I apologize. Continue. Are you going to call another witness to the stand though first?” His lips twitched.

  “Men have thought she was one way, only to discover she was another. My daughter is stronger than many.” Oh, I know… she almost got loose from the restraints the other day. You should’ve seen her! “Now, let me make something clear. I can tell I don’t like you already. However, if she loves you, and she says that she does, then I do, too, but let me make something perfectly clear. She isn’t alone. She’s grown, but she still has a shoulder to cry on and a gun to borrow.” The beautiful middle-aged woman’s eyes turned to slits. “And before you think this is about your race, that’s not true. You being White is none of my business though to me, you honestly look as if you’ve got some melanin somewhere in that family tree. Would it be inappropriate to ask you if that’s true?”

  “Not at all. My mother actually is part Greek and half Italian.” She nodded in understanding. “With a touch of Persian, too. My father is one hundred percent Sicilian.”

  “Okay. That’s it. I’m not surprised.”

  “Yes. He sometimes gets mistaken for North Indian. My father’s people, the majority of them, were naturally very tanned. Olive complexioned folks, if you will.”

  “Beautiful.” The word came out in a harsh tone, as if she didn’t believe it when she said it. “Why are you looking at me like that? Are you upset?”

  “Nope. I came here to meet Yasmine’s family. I expected to meet you and her father, too. I also knew there was a possibility that you may not like me, just like you said. Regardless, nothing you stated is upsetting. I’m honestly not sure where you’re going with all of this, and I’ve done nothing for you to not like me because you don’t know me. I’m not worried about it, though. Once you see for yourself how I feel about your daughter, how we’re good for one another, that’ll speak for itself. I haven’t done anything to you that would warrant this aggressiveness you’re showing me, but if there’s something you wanna know, just ask me.”

  “You asked, ‘Where I’m going with this?’ I am letting you know that she is loved and adored.”

  “I know that. I concur. I believe you. She doesn’t have daddy issues, messed-up headspaces, and clingy tendencies. I don’t need a broken woman to feel put together. Yasmine arrived to me pre-assembled. And I, too, came to her in mint condition. And believe me, I didn’t come out of nowhere, but she did…”

  The woman’s face registered confusion. He didn’t want her to know how much he was enjoying this mild sparring, although it felt somewhat forced, as if this woman wasn’t showing her true nature. She was just running off the mouth out of obligation. Maybe he was wrong…

  “Verbal cues are just as important as non-verbal ones. You’re giving me ‘snake’ vibes. You’re handsome, and you know it. You didn’t come into this world with a silver spoon in your mouth, so you appreciate hard work, and that’s good, but I notice your clothing… your jewelry. High end. It could also mean superficiality. Fake.”

  “I totally agree with you, Mrs. Prince. Your assessment of me is your right to have. I, for one, now see why Yasmine is the way she is.”

  “Is that a backhanded compliment?” She smirked.

  “Yes. Now, normally, I match energies with people. If someone is giving me grief, a hard time, I match them. Sometimes, I double or triple it. But you are my sweetheart’s mother, the life force of someone I happen to love very much. I can’t do that.”

  “Oh, you could try, like you’ve been doing. Go ahead… this is fun.” Her lips curled and her eyes gleamed.

  The woman just might be batshit crazy. But she also is no dummy. This was a calculated move.

  “You don’t have to try to intimidate me because honestly, you can’t. I know you love her, and I know this a test. I want your daughter. And I have her. Now, what?”

  The woman threw him an icy glare, and he reciprocated.

  “In fact, your daughter means more to me than I could ever express to you,” he continued, “You want to see if I am man enough to handle her because hell, if I can’t even accomplish that, how could I give her what she truly needs? You want her to have a man with backbone, refinement, and respect. You’re not certain if I am that man. I assure you that I am. Again, I believe this is a test, of the concerned mother emergency system, funded by Yasmine International.”

  I’m not a mother, but I am a motherfucker. The woman’s expression was now unreadable. Then, a faint smile creased her face. That smile grew into a head nod, and light laughter. She wrapped her hand around his shoulder and pulled him near.

  “I’m satisfied. For now,” she said in his ear. “And yes, I was toying with you. I wanted to see what you’d do. You did well. A little too much defiance, but I’ll give you a solid B+.”

  At this, he burst out laughing.

  “I’ve only gotten one B in my entire life. Is there any extra credit I can do so I can boost my grade?”

  “Perhaps! I’ll see how you treat my daughter. Now, I’ll answer the question you asked, earlier.”

  “About how she acts differently?”

  “Yes. She smiles more now than she has in years. Don’t get me wrong, Yasmine is a
happy woman – she finds joy in the small things, she appreciates her life and her worth. However, you added another layer. You were the extra oomph she desired. Whatever you’re doing, keep doing it. My baby deserves to smile like the Cheshire Cat. And word has it, you’re the cat’s meow.”

  Just then, Yasmine arrived with a man who reminded Nixon of Cab Calloway. His suit was nice, but a tad bit too big for his slender frame. His wavy salt and pepper hair was brushed back from his broad forehead and his eyes twinkled like a lake when the sun hits it just right. Nixon gave his hand a hearty shake.

  “I’m Yasmine’s father. Nice to meet you!”

  Nixon got a whiff of the man’s cologne, and it reminded him of his own father’s.

  “Nice to meet you, too! Thank you so much for inviting me.” The older man looked him up and down.

  “You want something to drink, man? You’re empty-handed?” The guy looked downright insulted. “You can’t be at Toni’s party and not have a drink! Come on with me. They’ve got a bar all set up in the kitchen.”

  Yasmine playfully patted her father on the shoulder and then Nixon caught the tail-end of a strange exchange between her and her mother. They glanced at one another and waved their pinky fingers. He had no idea what the hell that meant, but her mother followed it up with a wink.

  “Come on, now. I bet you’re a beer guy? No, maybe Scotch?”

  “I like them all!” Nixon walked beside the man and glanced back at Yasmine and her mother. They both tossed him a glance, then drew closer together, closing the gap, mischievousness etched across their faces.

  I was right. She brought me here to meet her parents but also to flunk or pass a test. It wasn’t her mother initiating this examination. She told her mother to do this. It’s a complete lawyer move, mixed in with a bit of Mama Bear persona. So, this is the shit I have to put up with, huh? Yasmine is devious. She likes getting me revved up and irritated on occasion so that I will fuck the shit out of her later. BELIEVE YOU ME, I WILL DELIVER ON THAT… I love it…

  CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO

  Rollercoaster of love within Dangerous Territory

  Ma sat in her favorite chair, legs crossed, snuggled in a dark brown robe over white pajamas and an anthropology magazine flipped open on her lap. Atop her head she’d tied a silk green and yellow paisley scarf, like the ones Yasmine sometimes used at night. Sprigs of soft dark brown waves with glimmers of silver crept from beneath it. Ma smelled like Halls Cough Drops as she sucked on one, trying desperately to keep a mild cough at bay.

  She turned a glossy magazine page, glanced up, and acknowledged Nixon, who was trying to figure out how to broach a certain subject. The place seemed stuffier than usual, smaller. Or perhaps it was just him being smothered by his own thoughts. Drowning.

  “You’re losing weight.” She licked her thumb and flipped to another page of the magazine. “I thought when people were in love, they gained weight?” she teased.

  “Oh… so that’s what this is about.” He smoothed out his long white shirt and took a seat. “You’re holding a grudge.”

  “All I know is that my oldest child has met someone and for the first time in his life feels compelled to bring her to a family dinner, one his father has come to town for. He’s dating steady, from what I hear, it’s been almost six months now. All of that and I’ve heard none of it.” She held her chin high, landing a death glare so intense, he felt it deep in his soul. She then casually looked away, returning her attention to what she’d been reading. “Then, that maniac, your father, gets to sit there and gloat, knowing he had one up on me.”

  “I didn’t realize it was a competition.” He made himself comfortable and laid his head on a pillow along the couch. The same one he’d fall asleep on as a teenager. Ma was a bit of a collector. No, scratch that – mild hoarder with a hard case of sentimentalism. He sniffed the air and smiled. The place smelled exactly the same, all day, every day… like sage, perfume, and wheat.

  “Your father isn’t aging well.” Ma was hella petty… “He looks like Frank Zappa after being run over by a dump truck,” she said with a snort. “How is he?” She peered at him, waiting.

  Nixon ran his hand along his thigh as he looked up at the ceiling.

  “You’ve got water damage.” He pointed to a faint stain shaped like a huge slug above his head. “Something leaked?”

  “Yes, the bathroom sink in my bedroom ran over a month ago. I was filling it to soak my hands, the phone rang, and I got distracted. How is he?” she repeated.

  “Do you actually care, Ma, or are you just makin’ conversation?”

  She turned another page of the periodical and paused for a moment before looking back at him.

  “Both.” He nodded in understanding.

  “He’s not doin’ too well, Ma. Healthwise, he’s okay, but mentally he’s not. He filed for divorce and Sophie, who I refuse to call my stepmother anymore, is doing what I warned him she would do – tryna get more than she came into the marriage with. He’s got an excellent attorney though. I left him in good hands.” He gave his jaw a good scratch.

  “I’m sorry to hear he’s hurtin’. I am sure it’s for the best, though.”

  “That he’s hurting is for the best?” he jabbed.

  “Don’t start with me, Nix. That woman had us fooled. All of us.”

  “Not me. I think she cared about Dad at first, but when things got tough, the tough got going.”

  “Is that statement really about me? When I decided I’d had enough and finally filed for divorce?” She didn’t look particularly perturbed, simply curious.

  “No. I lived it. I saw you two at each other’s throats. It wasn’t a healthy situation.” She nodded and adjusted her position on her seat. “We all hoped for the best, I guess.”

  “Nix, at first I was happy for him, ya know? When I said congratulations to him on finding love again, a long time ago, I meant it. I was glad he was outta my hair, too. He met her, they were dating and so, he was callin’ less. Sometimes your father would call me while intoxicated.”

  She closed her eyes, yet he could see her eyeballs were moving beneath the lids, as if she were dreaming. Perhaps playing back those nights like old tapes that needed erasing…

  She ran a slightly shaking hand across her forehead. “He was saying insane stuff. Talkin’ about killing himself… stuff like that. It was exhausting. Of course, the next day, he never remembered.” She huffed. “He was never the same after his mother died. That made it all the worse. Anyway, eventually he got re-married, and that all stopped. He had someone who could give him what I was no longer willing to give, but she was horrible to him. What a bitch.” She sucked her teeth. “Your father was a monster sometimes, God knows, but he didn’t deserve… never mind.” She swallowed the last of her cough drop, along perhaps with something else. An unknown emotion.

  “I know you care about his well-being, Ma. He still loves you, and though you don’t feel the same about him, that doesn’t mean you can’t at least be friends. One day, before it’s too late, maybe that could happen – just like he imagines in his head.”

  “I don’t know, Nix.” She took a deep breath and tossed the magazine onto the hexagon-shaped wooden coffee table. “I’m just not motivated. Your father is a bad dream I want to forget but then I look at you, see bits of him, and I am glad I endured the nightmare.” She smiled. “So, let’s get back to why you’re here, practically out of the blue. Yasmine…”

  “Yasmine…” he repeated. Even saying her name made his gut twist with excitement. After a few moments of silence, he slid his phone out of his pocket and pulled up a picture of the two of them together, then got up to show it to his mother. Ma cradled the phone in the palms of her hands as if she were holding the crown of a newborn baby.

  “She’s a doll.” She shot him a glance, still smiling wide. “She looks even prettier in person. From first impressions, she’s gold. You two look so happy.” She drew quiet for a spell, studying the picture. “Have you met her family
yet?”

  “Yeah… yeah. Great people. She and her mother played a trick on me.” He grinned. Devious women. “I’ll get into that later, but yeah, her parents are great. Extended family, too, the works. They were welcoming and her father and I really hit it off.”

  “That’s great, Nix.”

  “Ma…”

  “Yeah, baby?”

  “I’m here because I wanna marry her…” Heat rose in his chest. His gut churned again, this time tighter, much tighter.

  Ma’s smile turned contemplative.

  “I told your Aunt Gina just a year or so ago, that one day you’d settle down. She didn’t believe me,” She grimaced and made a flippant motion with her wrist. “Said, ‘Naaaah! That boy of yours is too much of a lady’s man!’ I told ’er, just you watch… just you wait and see. He will. I know Nix. I know my son. One day, he’s gonna get tired of being alone. One day, he’ll be around a bunch of women, all of ’em throwing themselves at him at any given day of the week, but he’ll feel alone. He’ll feel it. And it’ll crush him.” They both drew quiet for a spell.

  “Ma, do you ever get tired of being alone?”

  She stood and handed him his phone back. Once she returned to her seat, she tucked her leg beneath herself, placed her elbow on the arm of the chair, and rested her chin against her curled fingers. She seemed to drift off in a daydream.

  “Sometimes. But I have peace of mind now, and that rarely needs an audience.” He let those words sink in, and drowned in them. “Are you afraid, Nix? That’s what this is really about, right? You always do what you want. You never ask me for advice anymore.”

  “Afraid of what?”

  “Getting married?”

  “But I just said I want to marry her, so how could that make me afraid?”

  “You can want something and still be scared of it, Nix.” He lowered his head and scratched his forehead. “Kind of like a roller coaster… You want to get on it, but a little part of you is terrified. You know it’ll be fun. You know you’ll scream, but you don’t know the exact sensations you feel until you’re up there, riding the dips, dives, highs and lows, rapid turns and enduring harsh stomach flips. That’s how life works. That’s how love works, too. Even healthy relationships have valleys and mountains. Deserts, lakes, and streams.”