The Senate of course were an unknown quantity, but Corvus seemed to think that they could be dealt with without starting a war if we trod carefully. I'd told him in that case he'd better deal with it as I didn't trust myself, or my mouth, to be that diplomatic. I figured it was as well to know your own strengths and weaknesses. To my amusement he hadn't disagreed.
We walked into the great hall where we were enveloped by a wall of sound. The family cheered and roared, and I ran forward as I discovered everyone was here, hugging Inés and Rodney and Kai and anybody else that I could lay my hands on. I was too happy not to share it.
Rodney was bawling, and for once Dimitri was the one passing him an oversized hankie once Corvus had finished hugging him. Kai was next, who blushed and stammered and left a sparkly pink lipstick print on Corvus' cheek that made everyone laugh.
“I'm so happy for you, chérie.” I turned to see Inés beside me and knew she really was happy for me despite everything. We'd had our ups and downs she and I, but she'd proved herself to me so may times. I could trust her with my life. Though, from the lascivious looks she was casting Dragon, it might be safer for him to move on as quickly as possible.
There was still work to attend to. The introduction of a great many members to the family would take time and need to be handled with care, but for the moment the wolves seemed happy enough. I hoped they would forgive me when I returned them to normal.
Nothing, though, no matter how wonderful, can ever be perfect.
My brother had sent word that he was in Paris. Our family there were keeping him safe for the time being, but I knew he wouldn't rely on our help for long. It would put us in a difficult position with the Senate, and Cain wouldn't do that to me. He would disappear soon enough in the way only he knew how. No one would ever find him if he didn't want to be found. I prayed that I would see him again. I would do everything in my power to help him, if only I could figure out what that was.
And then there was Lucas.
I caught Corvus' eye, and he nodded. He knew where I was going and what I had to do as I slipped from the room.
Chapter 55
I turned as I heard the door open and close again behind me to see that Rodney had followed me out. The chains at his hips jingled a little as he walked towards me.
“He's waitin' for you, in the woods, luv. Said you'd know where.”
“Oh,” I replied, feeling awkward. “Thanks.”
Rodney walked over and slung an arm around my shoulder. “Don't blame yourself, lovely. Weren't your fault.”
I felt my eyes fill and sniffed as we walked to the front door. “He's my friend,” I said helplessly. “And this is his home.”
“Yeah,” Rodney murmured, squeezing my shoulders. “But you can't have him here, not wiv Corvus. Not now. He knows that, didn't need tellin' neither. Besides, 'e needs a new start too. Needs to find someone else don't he? You want 'im to be 'appy now don't you?” Rodney's face was full of concern, and I looked away.
“Of course I do,” I said, sniffing violently now. “But he's lived here for five hundred years, it's been his home all this time, we're his family, and we're throwing him out!” I said, hearing the pain in my voice. After everything Lucas had done we were practically evicting him. It didn't feel right.
“Bout time Corvus cut those apron strings then, ain't it?” he said with force. He grabbed me by the arms and made me look at him. “He's goin' to be a Master, Jéhenne, wiv a family of his own. Corvus 'as given him the rights to all those we lost in the battle wiv Dis Pater. Two hundred and forty seven children, that's a pretty good investment in a new Master, luv. He'll be powerful.”
I nodded and wiped my eyes. “Yes. I know that.” And I did. Everything Rodney had said was true, and it would be awful for Lucas to stay seeing me with Corvus every, day and it would be hard for us too, knowing our happiness made him miserable. “But I'm going to miss him.”
He pulled me into a hug and squeezed. “Yeah, I know. Me too to be 'onest, turned out he was a good bloke after all. But it's for the best, ain't it? For everyone.”
“Yes.” I couldn't disagree. I knew he was right. “Thanks, Rodney.” I kissed his cheek.
“Anytime, luv,” he said softly. “An ... well, I'm so 'appy for you and Corvus, like. It's bleedin' marvellous to 'av him back ain't it?”
I laughed and nodded rather more vigorously this time. “Yes! Bleedin' marvellous is exactly what it is.”
***
I made my way down into the woods. It was quite a walk to the spot where I knew he'd be waiting, but I was glad of it. It gave me a bit of time to steady my nerves. It was the place we had sat together the night Sariel took the madness from Corvus' mind and he woke properly for the first time. I had cried because Corvus hated me, didn't remember me at all and the future was crumbling in front of my eyes. Lucas had held me together, had reassured me. He'd told me to be patient because Corvus would love me again whether he remembered me or not. He'd be a fool not to. I realised now what he had been telling me that night, what I had been too caught in my own misery to hear. That he loved me.
He was sitting on the same fallen tree trunk, just as I knew he would be.
“Hi,” I said, wrapping my arms around myself. It was a warm night, but suddenly I felt chilled.
“Does he know you're here?” he asked, not looking at me, his voice dull. “I don't want to cause trouble between you.”
“He knows,” I said softly. “It's OK.”
He let out a breath and looked up at me. “Well I'm all packed. Haven't a clue where I'm going, but I guess I'll figure it out.” He got to his feet, his hands stuck in his pockets. “Oh,” he said, pulling an envelope from his back pocket. “Cyd asked me to give you that. She's coming with me,” he added. “Mary-Grace too, though heaven alone knows what I'm supposed to do with her.”
I smiled at him and shook my head. “Be careful, she has a crush on you.”
He frowned, looking appalled. “God, she's just a kid.”
I shrugged, walking toward the fallen tree he'd been sitting on and making myself comfy. “She's almost eighteen actually, she just looks younger. She's not really much younger than me.”
He snorted and shook his head. “Than that body perhaps,” he said with a smile.
I laughed, unable to contradict him. “True enough.”
“Well anyway, Cyd says she'll look out for her.”
“Good. That's good.”
The silence stretched between us, and I searched for something to say. “Two hundred and forty seven children, eh?”
He smiled but it didn't reach his eyes. “Corvus has been very generous.”
“You deserve it. You deserve everything good in life, Lucas, and I ... I really hope that you find ...”
He turned his back on me and shook his head. “Don't.”
“I have to,” I said, feeling the tears prickle in my eyes. “I need you to know that I'm going to miss you terribly, and that I could never have survived the past months without you. I owe you so much.”
He was silent, but I could feel his misery even though he was trying so hard to hold it back. His heart was breaking and it was my fault. I didn't know what to do, what to say. There was nothing that would make it better.
“Take care of yourself, Lucas,” I whispered and began to walk away but before I could take a step he spun around and grabbed hold of me, pulling me into his arms. For a moment I was rigid with alarm, terrified he was going to kiss me and that Corvus would know, but then I saw the tears in his eyes. Relaxing, I held him to me as he laid his head on my shoulder. I stroked his hair, crying quietly with him.
“I'm so sorry, Lucas. I wouldn't hurt you for the world, you know that don't you,” I said. He nodded, his face pressed into my hair.
“You never lied to me, Jéhenne, never pretended. I knew the risks. I never kidded myself I could replace him. I just ...” He stopped and held me tighter, and his voice was strained when he spoke again, barely more than a whisper. “I
had to try.”
“You'll find someone,” I said, straightening to look at him and blinking up through my tears. “Someone who will love you the way I love Corvus, and you'll be everything to each other.”
He gave a bark of laughter, though it was the least happy sound I had ever heard. “Jéhenne, I am over nine hundred years old, and I have never before felt as I do for you. Somehow I doubt it is an experience I'm going to repeat any time soon.” He gave me a rueful grin. “I fucking hope not anyway, it sucks.” His eyes glittered in the darkness, and my heart ached. I knew everything he was feeling right now, chapter and verse. I had lived every moment of this misery and I wouldn't wish it on anyone, certainly not on someone who'd become as dear to me as he had. I felt a hot tear slide down my face and shook my head.
“Don't say that. It's worth it. It's always worth it in the end.”
He reached out and wiped the tear away. “I'll take your word for it.” He leaned down and pressed his lips to my forehead.
“Be happy, Jéhenne. I'll never forget you.”
And then he was gone.
I lingered in the woods for a while, until the wolves, my wolves, came and found me. I didn't want to return to the Château until my heart had eased a little. I couldn't let Corvus see how upset I was. It wouldn't go over well. I made my way back, reflecting on the events of the past weeks. I was so lucky to have survived at all. To have done it and got Corvus back too was nothing short of miraculous. But a lot of people had paid a very high price for that miracle, and I wasn't about to forget it.
I hoped that Lucas would find a home where he could be happy again and that Mary-Grace didn't cause him too many headaches. I even wished Cyd well. I ran my hand over the envelope Lucas had given me. I had a fair idea what the letter contained, and I was in no hurry to read it. Wishing her well was one thing. I wasn't sure I ever wanted to see her again. I certainly didn't want her near Corvus.
I paused, listening to an owl's eerie cry as it hunted, and I waited for it, watching as it glided silently overhead, the flailing body of a small rodent hanging from its beak. An efficient and deadly hunter. Inevitably I thought again about my brother and wondered if he was still in Paris. I wished he could be here, celebrating with us, but he wasn't the only one absent from my life.
***
I returned to the Château to find Inés waiting for me on the steps. She was practically bouncing so I knew it was good news for a change. I sped up, surprised to see Dragon with her too.
“What's going on?”
She ran up to me, grabbing me by the waist in her excitement. “He's alive!” she shrieked.
I looked at her, bewildered for a moment before the penny dropped, and I sucked in a breath of anticipation, praying I was right. “Corin?”
“Oui!” she squealed. “Isn't it wonderful!”
I yelped with delight, laughing and hugging her in return, more than prepared to agree. “Yes, perfectly wonderful!” It was. I owed Corin a great debt. He had been a good friend to me, better than I had known at the time. I was overjoyed to hear he was safe and well.
“Alors, I told you,” she said, sounding appallingly smug. “I knew he couldn't be dead. He's far too powerful for anyone to kill.”
“But it wasn't an enemy who nearly did it for him.”
Inés and I both turned to look at Dragon who I guessed was the source of this news.
“Oh?” I asked.
He nodded. “It was his own heart that nearly killed him, so I'm told. He's finally fallen in love, and the lady was a little harder to capture than he anticipated from what I hear.”
I felt a chill run over me as I considered what Rodney had told me, that he had taken Claudette with him.
“What's her name?” I demanded.
Dragon shrugged. “I don't know, I didn't ask.”
I tutted in annoyance at the lack of information, but Inés was shaking her head and laughing.
“It doesn't matter what her name is. There's no way that will last. Can you imagine Corin being faithful to anyone for more than a week?”
I frowned, remembering a kiss in the darkness and the desperate longing I'd felt from him to be loved and needed as much I loved Corvus. “Yes, actually,” I said, surprising myself as much as Inés. “I can.”
“Merde! Just because you're all loved up, doesn't mean the rest of the world has tilted on its axis, you know. Too much sex,” she added, grinning. “It's addled your brain.”
“Is there such a thing as too much sex?” Dragon asked mildly as we headed back indoors.
Inés paused, looking up at him through her lashes. “Je ne sais pas,” she said thoughtfully. “Want to find out?”
Dragon looked thoroughly alarmed, so I grabbed him by the hand and hauled him indoors. “I think Rodney was looking for you,” I said loudly.
“He was? I'll just ...” He was gone before the door closed behind us.
“Spoilsport,” Inés grumbled.
I laughed and held her arm in mine. “Come on, you old tart, lets get you back to the party.”
***
I did a detour past my room for a quick shower and change of clothes before rejoining the others as Corvus' threat was still ringing in my ears. The man himself gave me a cool, searching look as I entered the room, but I held his gaze and whatever worries he'd been harbouring seemed to dissipate. His smile was warm as he held out his hand to me, and I took it willingly. Everyone was in high spirits, and in truth so was I, but I couldn't pretend that everything was how it should be. And it wasn't just Cain and Lucas that were missing. I couldn't pretend that there wasn't still someone I needed to make this right. To complete our family.
I walked away to a quieter corner and pulled Dragon aside. “Hey,”
“Hey, yourself,” he said, grinning broadly. I wondered why he had run so fast from Inés. I mean I didn't blame him, she was terrifying, but most men were blinded by her beauty before they realised that, and Dragon was no shrinking violet. Not my business anyway. “I wanted to thank you, for staying with us and ... well, for everything you did. I hear you were pretty impressive up by the gates.”
He shrugged his massive shoulders, looking pleased and a little embarrassed. “I guess I wanted to do something for the right reasons for a change,” he said. “I've seen how hard you fight for what's right, Jéhenne, for what you believe in. It's ... inspiring. In fact it's made me realise it's time to face my own demons, scary as they might be.”
It was my turn to look awkward and I stammered a thank you. He went to turn away, but I stopped him, grabbing his arm.
“Wait, can you tell me something?” I asked. “Have you ever heard of Dragon Back Mountain?”
He looked at me in surprise and nodded. “Yes, of course I've heard of it.”
I let out a breath in excitement. “You have? Where is it?”
“It's part of the mountain range that separates Talamh óir from Alfheim.” He looked at my blank expression and laughed. “In the Fae Lands.”
“The ...” My face fell. “Shit!”
“What is in the Fae Lands?” I jumped as Corvus' voice met my ears. My heart was beating out of my chest as the implications all fell into place. He looked at me, a frown in his eyes as he picked up on the turbulence of my emotions. I stared at him, suddenly unable to tell him what it was I needed.
“Your son,” he said, and I couldn't decipher the tone of his voice.
“You remember?” I replied, my voice a little unsteady as I began to worry in earnest.
He nodded, his face unreadable, but the tension around us was unmistakable.
“I remember. I promised to help you find him.” I watched as his gaze remained on me, unwavering. “I meant it then. I still do.”
“Even if he's in the Fae Lands?” I asked. My heart was beating too hard, too fast. I didn't want to spoil things with Corvus. I wanted to hold on to the happiness that was so fragile and new, but ... but I had been a mother once, even if it was in another life time, and my son wa
s out there. I had to find him.
Corvus sighed and reached out, taking my hand. “Jéhenne, I have made a promise, and I will keep it but ... I don't think this is the time.”
“What?”
“Dragon, tell her what you told me earlier.”
Dragon looked awkward at being dragged into what was clearly an emotional subject. He cleared his throat, giving me an apologetic look. “Well, it's just that tensions are rising, Jéhenne. There is a very real threat of war between the Elves and the Light Fae. If it kicks off, the likelihood is that the Dark Fae Prince Laen will stand with Alfheim. He's the Elven Prince Corin's closest friend, and he won't let Corin go to war alone, not without him.” I glanced at Corvus to see what response the mention of Corin's name would evoke, but he didn't react at all. I turned back to Dragon who was carrying on with his explanation. “This will split the Dark Fae as those who are loyal to Laen’s father, King Braed, would stand with the Light Fae against Corin.” He shrugged, shaking his head. “The Fae Lands are about to become very dangerous indeed.”
I turned to Corvus, grasping his arm. “All the more reason to go and find my son before it begins!”
“Jéhenne,” he said, his voice heavy. “You don't know anything about him. Dis Pater has hidden him from you for two millennia. He might be a thousand years old and a general in one of the armies for all you know!”
“Or he might be a babe in arms, helpless and defenceless!” I countered, feeling my temper flare. “That would be more Dis Pater's style, to hurt me as much as he could.”
I turned back to Dragon, appealing for help. “What's on Dragon Back Mountain?” I demanded.
“Nothing much but snow and ice,” he said, his eyes sympathetic now. “In the past it was a place no one went, the domain of real dragons,” he said with a wry grin. “And ice bears. Now there is only the ancient Monastery that remains, but truthfully I don't even know if that exists any more.”
“The Monastery?” I repeated, feeling my heart leap.
He nodded. “An elite group of Warrior Monks, even in the past they were few and a very particular breed. It's said they were called to duty by the goddess herself.” He hesitated before adding. “I met one once.”
The Fires of Tartarus Page 45
