Maybe Matt's Miracle

by Tammy Falkner

  After everyone gets a ride and I make sure they all have snacks, I walk out into the hallway. Emily is standing there, and she looks me up and down and nods.

  “What?” I ask.

  “Nothing,” she sings, grinning like a fool.

  “Say it,” I prompt.

  She shrugs. But then she looks up into my face. “You’re going to be the best dad ever, Matt,” she says.

  My heart swells. “Well, at least I don’t have to worry about them turning out like me.” I scratch my belly. “Being this handsome is quite a burden to bear.”

  She laughs and punches me in the gut.

  I bend in the middle, clutching my stomach, and that’s when Sky walks around the corner.

  She looks toward Hayley’s room. “I was just going to check on the girls,” she says.

  “I just did,” I tell her. Her brow furrows, and she looks so damn pretty that I want to kiss her. “Don’t tell anyone but Mellie’s pants peed on her,” I whisper dramatically.

  She turns toward her bag. “Oh, I better get some clothes,” she says.

  “Already took care of it,” I say, and I wrap my arms around Sky.

  She hugs me back. “You took care of it?” She lays her face against my chest and nuzzles against me. I could stand here like this all day long.

  “Of course,” I say.

  She mumbles something against my chest that sounds like, “You’re really sexy when you take care of children.”

  “Hey,” I cry. “You should see me when I vacuum. And do dishes. You won’t be able to stand the sexy.”

  She laughs and kisses the center of my chest, just over my heart.

  We go back into the living room, and I sit at her feet while she sits on the couch. Emily picks up her guitar again after Reagan gets herself all cleaned up. Or after Pete cleans Reagan up, which takes way longer than it should. Emily starts to play, and I feel Sky’s fingers tickle across the back of my neck. I reach up to pull the rubber band from my hair and lean closer to her. She takes the hint and starts to draw her fingers down the length of my hair.

  I really need a haircut, but after having been bald for so long, I don’t want to cut it off. I feel like Sampson who took his strength from his hair. I know it’s stupid, but it’s how I feel. My hair being as long as it is means I’m healthy. I’m not going through chemo. I’m not taking lots of meds. I’m just me.

  Sky doesn’t stop stroking me, not even when the song changes. I have my family around me, and nothing has ever felt quite so right.

  “So, who’s going to the wedding tomorrow?” Pete asks all of a sudden.

  Emily’s fingers stumble across the strings, and she slaps her hand down over them to quiet the noise. “Pete,” she hisses.

  “What?” he asks, throwing up his hands.

  “What wedding?” Sky asks.

  I look up at her and tangle my fingers with hers on my shoulder. “An old friend of mine is getting married,” I say.

  Pete makes a blowing noise with his mouth that sounds a lot like the noise we heard a goat make once at a petting zoo. Paul shoots him a look, and he bites back whatever he was going to say next.

  “Why would he go to that?” Reagan asks Pete, and she looks at him like he’s grown two horns.

  “To prove that he’s ov—” Pete grunts and shuts up when Reagan elbows him in the stomach. I would have gone for his nuts, honestly. “The invitation was for all of us,” Pete grumbles. “We should at least go and eat all their food and drink all their drinks. Just saying.”

  “Did you want to go?” Sky asks me.

  I shake my head. “Not really.”

  “You said it’s an old friend, right?” she asks.

  I nod my head. “Sort of.”

  “I think you should go.”

  “You could take Sky with you,” Pete says. “Rub that shit—” He grunts again when Reagan hits him on the back of the head.

  “Go for his nuts next time,” I tell Reagan.

  “Good idea,” she says as she shoots daggers at him with her eyes. “Your nuts are mine the next time you open your mouth,” she warns, pointing a finger toward his crotch.

  “My nuts have been yours since the day I met you, princess,” he says.

  Sam makes a gagging noise, pretending like he’s going to throw up.

  “So, did you want to go?” Sky asks. I wish she’d leave it alone. But I’d have to tell her what’s up in order for her to do that, and I’m honestly having so much fun that I don’t even want to think about April and Ken. I don’t want to let them steal one minute of my happiness.

  Emily elbows Logan. “We could go with them,” she says. “For moral support.”

  Logan shrugs his shoulders. He couldn’t care less, apparently.

  “Well, then it looks like we’re going,” I say on a heavy breath. “Yay,” I deadpan. “Can you be ready by two?” I look up at Sky.

  “Oh, you want me to go with you?” she asks, her eyes opening wide with shock.

  I tug her hand until she has no choice but to lean toward my face so I can kiss her. “I wouldn’t go without you,” I say. “Come with me.”

  “What about the kids?” she asks.

  Friday raises her hand. “I’ll babysit. I got nothing better to do.”

  But Seth steps up. “I’ll watch them. No big deal.”

  “You don’t have any plans?” Sky asks.

  He shakes his head. “Nope.” He avoids her gaze. “Nothing at all.” Something is up with that, but I have no idea what. I’ll find out later.

  “Then it’s settled,” Pete says. He leans back, a satisfied look on his face.

  It’s far from settled. The farthest of the far from settled. But at least I’ll have Sky with me, which might make it bearable.

  Skylar

  Matt helps me and Seth as we unload the car and get the girls upstairs. I swear, there’s a lot more to being a parent than I ever imagined. There are toys and bags and clothes, and then the kids themselves. Matt has Joey over his shoulder, and Seth carries Mellie.

  The girls fell asleep at Matt’s apartment, and we decided to scoop them up and bring them home instead of letting them wake up in a strange place. Between that and finding a place for Seth and Matt and me to all sleep, it was just too difficult. I kind of want to wake up in my own bed with Matt tomorrow morning—if he wants to stay over, that is. I haven’t asked him yet. But it’s what I want.

  I know he feels funny about setting a bad example for Seth, but Seth is almost an adult. I think he’ll be fine with it.

  We go inside, and Matt and Seth put the girls to bed and tuck them in tightly. I give them both a kiss because it’s becoming part of our nightly routine. Sometimes I still sneak into their room to watch them sleep, but I get to take part in the bedtime ritual, too. I like putting them to bed and hearing them talk to their mother when they think I’ve left the room. It’s heartbreaking and uplifting at the same time.

  Matt and I walk out into the kitchen, and he gets a bottle of water from the fridge.

  “I had a really good time tonight,” I tell him as I load the few dishes that are left from dinner.

  “I did, too,” he says. “My family likes you.”

  “Did you already know about Emily and Logan? You seemed surprised.”

  He snorts. “I wouldn’t have thrown her over my shoulder if I had known.” He winces a little. “Didn’t mean to do that.”

  “You’re happy for them, right?” I ask. I watch him closely because Matt usually wears his feelings on his face.

  “Oh yeah,” he breathes. “Emily is pretty worried, though.”

  “About what?”

  “She has dyslexia,” he says. “Reading is hard for her.”

  “I know what dyslexia is.”

  “She’s afraid the baby will have it, too, if it gets her genes.” He shrugs his shoulders. “She’s just worried, like any new mom would be.”

  “How do you think Logan will do with a baby?” I ask. I have always wonde
red how deaf people raise hearing children.

  “He’s been taking care of Hayley her whole life,” he says. “He can do a lot more than people give him credit for.”

  “Oh, that’s not what I meant,” I start.

  But he cuts me off with a smile. “I know. I get it.”

  “Is she going to have to quit school?” I ask. I know Emily is in college at Julliard.

  He shrugs. “I have no idea, but they’ll work it out. Sometimes I think she went to college just to prove she could succeed. And she has. She’s satisfied. All she wants to do is play music.”

  “She should be playing huge venues with a voice like hers,” I say. It really was amazing.

  He shakes his head. “She has no desire for fame. She just really loves music. And she loves my brother. So, I love her.”

  I walk over and wrap my arms around his waist and then lay my head on his chest. My cheek rests over his heart. “My little family fits into your big family pretty nicely,” I say quietly.

  “Yep.” He sets me back from him with his hands on my shoulders. “Were you worried about that?”

  I shrug. “Maybe a little.”

  “Talk to me,” he says.

  “You guys are just so tight,” I admit. “I’m envious of your bond.”

  “You’re part of our bond, now. You know that right?” he says. The hair on my arms stands up. “Just like Emily and Reagan. You’re part of the family.”

  I nod against his chest. Seth walks into the kitchen and hitches his hip against the counter. “Would you mind if I have a friend over tomorrow night while I’m babysitting?” he asks. He doesn’t meet my gaze, and he avoids Matt’s, too. Hmm.

  “Who’s the friend?” I ask.

  He shrugs. “I don’t know yet. I was just thinking it would be fun to have someone over to talk to.”

  “Talking?” Matt asks. “That’s what you’re planning to do?”

  Seth’s face flushes. “Well, we might play Xbox or something, too.”

  What would his mother do? “Why don’t you come back to me in the morning with the name of a person you want to have over, and we’ll discuss it?” I say. “Will that work?”

  He scowls, but he nods. He sits down at the kitchen table and starts to flip through a magazine. Matt jams his hands in his pockets and rocks back and forth on his heels. He raises his brows at me. Then he sits down across from Seth and flips open the newspaper until he finds the crossword section. He and Seth start to work it together. Seth laughs when Matt gets a word wrong. And Matt goads Seth incessantly about his penmanship. They look happy and comfy together, though, so I go into the bedroom to shower and get into my jammies.

  Matt

  I watch Sky’s ass as she walks toward her bedroom without a word. I heave a sigh. I want to follow her and grab her ass and lift her shirt and bite the sensitive skin on her side, just above her hip. I want to undress her slowly. I shift in my chair and adjust my jeans. Seth snorts.

  “What?” I ask, trying to look innocent.

  “Dude, you’re so transparent,” Seth says. But he’s grinning. He’s not mad.

  “What’s transparent?” I ask. How much I love her? I hope that’s transparent. How much I respect her? I hope that’s obvious. How much I want her? That might be better left between the two of us.

  He closes the magazine. “Sorry I cockblocked you,” he says.

  That hits me in the gut. “Don’t talk about your aunt that way,” I snap.

  Seth’s brow furrows. “I didn’t say anything bad.”

  “Don’t talk about her like I’m hanging out trying to get in her pants. It’s not like that.”

  He nods his head slowly. “If you say so.”

  “Seth,” I warn.

  “What?” he bites out.

  I can’t think of what I should tell him, so I have to go for the truth. “I love her, Seth. I love her a lot. And yeah, I want to get in her pants. But I also want to marry her, and I want to get to love her forever. I want to live with her and share all her ups and downs.” I drum my thumbs on the table, trying to figure out what else to say to make him understand. He’s a walking hormone, which is what he should be at his age. He’s not thinking long term. But I am. “So, when you talk about cockblocking me, it makes me worry that you might think that’s all I’m after. It’s not. I respect her. And I want to be sure you know that.”

  Seth does that slow nod again, like he’s thinking it over.

  “Would it bother you if I asked her to marry me?” I blurt out. No idea where that came from, but there it is.

  Seth’s brow rises. “You really want to marry Aunt Sky?”

  I nod. I do. I so do.

  He looks around, and a little muscle tics in his jaw as he grinds his teeth. “What happens to us if you get married?” he asks.

  Huh? “What do you mean?”

  “I mean if you and Aunt Sky get married, she’s going to be your wife. We were just getting used to her being our mother.”

  Oh, I get it. Shit. “Can’t she do both?”

  He shrugs. “Can she?”

  “The only difference I see is that you’d have two parents at home instead of one.”

  Seth’s eyes narrow. “Two parents.”

  I nod. “Seth, I know I’m not your father, and I never will be. But I want to be part of your life. In whatever way you’ll let me.” It’ll probably be in some ways he doesn’t appreciate, too, but that’s what dads do. It’s not always Father’s Day and Little League fun. “I don’t want to take Sky away from you. I promise.” It’s important for him to get that last part. He needs to feel safe with her and know that she’ll always be there, no matter what. Hell, in two years, he’ll be going off to college. I won’t have long with him at all, not like Joey and Mellie.

  “Your family is pretty cool,” Seth says quietly.

  “Sometimes they’re not.” I laugh. Usually they are.

  “So, you staying over tonight?” Seth asks.

  I shake my head. “No.”

  “Why not?” He looks confused.

  “Because I respect Sky.” Because I don’t want you think poorly of her.

  “Whatever, man,” he says as he gets up. “I’m going to bed.”

  “Good night,” I say.

  He goes into his room and closes the door. I let out a deep breath. God, there’s a lot to consider when there’s a teenager in the house. He’s impressionable, and he’s going to learn how to treat women from the way his mother was treated, and the way Sky is treated around him in the future. I am determined to be a good influence.

  Sky walks out of her room, her hair damp around her shoulders. “Did Seth go to bed?” she asks. She fidgets around the kitchen, like she’s not quite sure what to do.

  “Yep.” I stand up and lean against the counter. She turns to set up the coffeepot for tomorrow morning, and I see her ass in those pajama bottoms and I want to just grab it and plump it and sink my teeth into it. But I have to go home. I groan to myself.

  “What’s wrong?” she asks, turning to face me.

  “Nice jammies,” I say.

  She looks down at herself, grins, and strikes a dramatic pose. “You like them?”

  I swipe a hand down my face. “I’d like them more if they were on the floor.”

  She freezes. The skin I can see through the open vee of her pajama top colors, turning all rosy. “Oh,” she breathes. But then she grins and crooks a finger at me. “I think they would really like to be on the floor.”

  I groan again and toss my head back. “I can’t.”

  She freezes again. “You’re not staying?”

  I shake my head. I’m stupid. I know.

  “Why not?” she asks quietly.

  I point toward Seth’s room. “Because we have a teenager in the other room, and I need to set a good example for him.” I hate this. But it is what it is.

  Her jaw falls open. “You’re worried about Seth?”

  I nod and raise my knuckle to my mouth, biting down
on it, trying to take some of the ache out of my nuts.

  “I think Seth is old enough to understand.”

  I shake my head. “I know. But he just said something that hit home with me. I don’t want him to think I’m with you because I want to score.” I do want to score, but that’s beside the point.

  She motions from her to me and back. “I kind of hoped to score,” she whispers vehemently. She glances toward Seth’s closed door. “He’s in bed. He’ll never know.”

  I point to my chest. “But I’ll know.”

  She harrumphs, and her shoulders drop. “I put on perfume and everything,” she mumbles.

  I walk over to her and wrap my arms around her, sniffing her neck. I can smell the sweet scent that’s her, but I can’t tell where she applied it. “Where?” I ask, hesitant when I hear my own voice quaver.

  “Wouldn’t you like to know?” she asks with a giggle. She steps onto her tiptoes and wraps her arms around my neck.

  I walk her backward toward her room as I kiss her. Her lips are hungry against mine, and she takes greedy little nips at my mouth. I want to stay. I want to be inside her. But I can’t.

  I grab the hem of her shirt and shove her gently through the doorway of her bedroom at the same time, yanking the shirt over her head.

  “Change your mind?” she asks, breathless, as she covers her breasts with her hands. They plump around her fingertips, and I want to kiss her fingers away.

  I lift her shirt to my nose and sniff it. “I’m taking this with me because it smells like you.”

  “Matt,” she protests, but it’s more of a playful grunt. “Give me my shirt.”

  “If you want the shirt, you have to give me your panties,” I say. I glance down.

  “I’m not wearing any panties,” she says, taunting me.

  I lean forward and kiss her forehead, lingering for just a moment, taking in the feel of her clutching my shirt in her fists. “God, you’re killing me,” I say. I let my hands drift up and down her naked back, and she purrs like a kitten, pressing her tits against my chest.