Radiant Joy Brilliant Love

by Clinton Callahan

  for new ideas / ways of being, 3

  for planning with attention, 133

  for practice, 112

  for possibility, 506

  for rite of passage, 68

  for using problems, 507

  for war, beliefs against, 134

  for Winning Happening, 515

  for women’s liberation, 64

  meme, 21, 211, 214, 487, 501, 513; also see: thoughtware, Box

  memetic virus, 21, 403, 501-502

  memetic weeding, 63-64

  memetics, 251, 502

  memories, 447

  men’s culture, see: gender culture

  mental-map, see: thought-map

  meta-conversation, 149-153, 502, Map of, 150

  middleworld, 347-349

  mind,

  and beliefs, 136

  and Box, 226

  chatter, 157

  creative, 75-76

  and “cool ideas,” 227

  and experience, 407

  and feelings, 178

  and intellectual body, 502

  and myth, 343

  and other places to be, 411

  and perfect concepts, 104-105

  and schizophrenia, 464

  and Western culture, 418, 502

  women’s, 336

  mindset, see: Box

  minimize now, 239-240, 326, 409, 412, 484, 502; also see: now, time

  misidentification, 56-57, 251

  mixing feelings,

  anger with fear, 86

  anger, sadness, joy and fear, 97-99

  and Archetypes, 493-494

  and broken heart, 258

  clarity about, 176

  create confusion, 43

  disempowering and, 188

  and emotional Edgework, 229

  and inner navigation, 502-503

  joy with fear, 87

  learning to stop, 182

  Map of, 98

  and self-sitting, 402

  and pain, 265

  psychological breakdown and, 99

  rage with joy, 86

  sadness and anger, 83, 87, 188

  sadness and joy, 86

  schadenfreude, 99, 229, 503

  terror and sadness, 86

  Möbius strip, 64

  modern culture, see: Western culture

  moment, see: now

  morphogenetic field (Sheldrake), 376-377, 503; also see: liquid state

  Mother Graduation Party, 358, 461

  N

  naïveté, 87, 103, 352, 389, 490, 496

  and asking for what you want, 189

  and authority, 24

  and boundaries, 193

  of / around children, 100-101, 398

  danger of, 497

  disillusioned with, 490

  in expansive learning, 15

  of feeling glad, 94, map of, 95

  and Gremlin, 352

  the Goddess and, 280

  infatuation and, 32

  innocence and, 325

  patriarchal distortions and, 59

  about psychic sex, 447

  in relationship, 313

  and stories, 389

  and sword work, 299

  in underworld, 351

  about what you don’t know, 23-24

  navigating

  inner, 97, 177-178, 497-498

  Map of the Space of Relationship, 2, 140

  space, 140-142, 165, 167, 253-255, 306, 426-427, 432, 485, 503, 506,

  also see: space

  needs,

  and actions, 215

  asking for, 189-192, 202, 273

  and attention, 260

  and Box, 77, 327, 372

  change, 218

  childhood, 31, 115-116, 492

  and emotional reactions, 181

  and gameworlds, 487-488

  and Goddess, 423

  of heart and soul, 207-209

  and holding space, 412

  ordinary, 119

  partner’s, 212

  physical and psychological, 56, 168, 432

  and problems, 60

  and reciprocal exchange, 338

  and relationship energetics, 336, 420, 427

  and the trainer, 506

  your own, 205

  “negative” feelings, 92-97

  neutrality,

  and Adult ego state, 34

  and everything that happens, 315, 360, 361, 488-489, 500, 508, 512

  and experience, 95-96, 256

  and facts, 290

  and feedback, 191

  and feelings, 96

  and liquid state, 127-128

  and men, 60

  and noticing, 55

  and pain, 91, 179

  and stories, 290

  and the sword of clarity, 305

  and universe, 77

  and women’s clothing, 293

  new age, 348

  new territory, 17, 503

  nice boy, 24, 46, 71, 86, 131, 205, 277, 293, 298, 305

  nice girl, 46, 86, 131, 205, 277, 292-293

  Nine Cow methodology, 388-392

  Nine Cow Story (Callahan), 386-388

  nit, education, 143-149

  no reason,

  appreciate people for, 96

  ask for help for, 192

  be different for, 446

  being happy for, 210

  being together for, 199, 323

  bless people for, 95

  body is lovable for, 103

  creating for, 201

  cry / laugh for, 478

  enter extraordinary relationship for, 219

  feel joy for, 286

  Gremlin destroys for, 371, 496

  let kindness prevail for, 241

  love for, 120

  make decisions for, 218

  practice for, 507

  rub feet for, 116

  wanting what we want for, 190

  also see: reasons

  nondual perspective, 313

  nonlinearity,

  and actions, 200-207, 325-326

  and assumptions, 503

  and empowerment, 14

  and Gremlin, 371-372

  in Manmaking, 286-287

  and meta-conversations, 152

  and relationship, 80, 209, 228, 333, 482, 502, 509, 514

  also see: linearity

  normal neurotic listening, 164-165, 170-171

  Nothing,

  and Creator Archetype, 271-273, 300

  Disk of, 491

  is bigger than Everything, 271-273, 299-300, map of, 268

  Men are, 267, 275, 486

  Sitting There Together With (poem), 483

  not knowing, 6, 275

  not okay to feel, 93-94, map of, 95

  now,

  and change, 117

  and decisions, 503-504

  and delight, 482

  and doing, 140, 489

  and evolution, 313

  and experience, 21

  and feeling happy, 482

  and gaps, 239-241

  and love, 21

  and the miraculous, 124

  and past or future, 283-284

  and power, 116

  and presence, 458

  and responsibility, 484, 502

  and sanctuary, 443

  and stories, 362

  and time, 118

  O

  objectivity,

  and Archetypal Love, 253, 316

  and artwork, 431, 501

  and attention, 104

  and beliefs, 135

  benefits of, 192

  and feelings, 182

  and is-glue, 498

  and reactions, 149

  and reality, 508

  and relationship, 513

  and sanity, 192

  and subverting the patriarchy, 55

  and a third intelligence, 473

  and writing, 20

  obstacles, 416-417

  Of Water and Spirit (Somé), 65

  okay-ness (Transactional Analysis), 37, 504, 509, 514

  one team, 1
8-19, 171-173

  ordinary human communication, 32-35

  ordinary human love, 29-32

  ordinary human relationship, 29-32

  Handbook for Creating, 38-50

  Handbook for Creating, in Family, 455-456

  Map of __vs. Archetypal Relationship, 268

  organizations,

  and change, 128

  definition of, 469, 504

  and domination, 52

  and gameworlds, 375-377

  innovative, 117

  and matriarchy, 51

  and meta-conversations, 149-152

  and Principles, map of, 400

  and resolution to end corporate personhood, 85

  and rigid structures, 56

  orthogonality, 80, 502, 504, 507

  Outdoor Survival Skills (Olsen), 477

  Overwhelm, Map of, 113

  P

  pain

  consciously creating, 18

  changing to rocket fuel, 265-266

  from feedback, 123

  vs. feelings, 179

  of learning, 178

  vs. suffering, 91

  painting doorways, 425, 504

  paradise, 66, 303, 315, 386-387, 394-395, 425, 435, 477, 479-480

  Paradoxical Commandments, The (Keith), 288

  parallel culture, 63, 316, 504, Map of, 316

  Parent Effectiveness Training (Gordon), 156

  Parent ego state, 33, 34, 114, 118, 484

  parenting (child raising, children)

  alternative approaches to, 54-55

  and Archetypal to Child relationship, 453-454, map of, 314

  and assumptions about children, 189

  and attention, 175, 239, 457-459

  and authority, 160

  and being-with children, 198-200

  and blaming other parent, 42

  and child’s exuberance, 265

  and communicating about problems, 160-163, map of, 160

  and completion loops, 157-159, maps of, 158 and 162

  and computers, 231

  and conscious expectations, 386-392, 493

  Dad’s place in, 59-60

  and Edgework experiments, 232-234, 513

  and evolution of self, 397-401

  and extraordinary relationship, 210, 212, 213, 215-216

  and fear of children, 100-101

  and feelings training, 99

  and grades, 344

  with heart / soul food, 207-209

  and holding space, 375, 412, 454-457

  and influences from parents, 41, 130, 293

  and irresponsible Archetypes, 484

  and letting go, 460-463

  and low drama, 185

  and making boundaries, 193, 195-198

  and making time, 459-460

  and meta-conversations, 152-153

  and nuclear family, 469-470

  and ordinary family relationship, 455-456

  in the patriarchy, 52-54, 58-59

  a problem child, 48

  and radiant joy brilliant love, 451-453

  and rescuing, 37

  and rite of passage, 66, 102

  and sexuality, 293

  and tantrums, 299-300

  and trusting partner, 239

  as space of possibility, 322

  and stories, 300-301

  and verbal reality, 513

  and your vision, 238

  and Western culture, 496

  and what woman wants, 337

  when something is wrong, 167

  and whining, 215-216

  underworld and, 347

  past-life vow, 376; also see: restricting sphincters

  pathological liar, 130, 265-266

  patriarchy,

  and Archetypal Man / Woman, 267, 268-269, 329, 359

  and matriarchy, 51-52

  and men, 2, 57-60, 69, 73, 295-296, 486-487

  noticing the, 55-56

  options not offered by, 54

  reason for, 268

  and rite of passage, 65, 67

  subverting the, 55, 359

  and Technopenuriaphobia (TPP), 513

  and women, 3, 60-64, 68, 69, 73, 265, 279, 290, 358, 482

  and Western culture, 52-54, 67, 302, 305-306, 353

  pattern disintegration, 21-22

  Pearce, Joseph Chilton, 25, 460

  penis, see: magic lamp

  permission,

  to allow healings, 417

  to bring life to life, 228, 491

  to create success, 505

  for feelings, 92, 188

  to grant yourself__, 505

  to learn, 21, 82, 126

  to be intimate, 105

  to love, 239, 356

  to be passionate, 205

  persecutor, 35-38, 184, 504

  personality, see: Box

  Phase 1 and Phase 2 of feelings work, 101-102, 194

  Phoenix Effect, 452-453, Map of the, 453

  physical center, 173-175, 504; also see: center

  physical body, 90-91

  physical space, 140, 510; also see: energetic space, space

  pig-making, 45, 282, 290, 388-392

  Pirate (responsible Pirate), 279, 295-296, 505

  Pirate agreement, 505

  Pirate … Man, 295-302

  Pirate … Woman, 278-281, 482

  planet to star, see: stellating

  playing full out, 477

  position, 86, 364, 371, 499, 500

  of being at source, 266

  of being right, 131, 207, 299, 487

  belief system and, 83, 86, 134, 487

  Box and, 82, 105

  with children, 152

  defending a, 138-139

  definition of, 505

  in a game, 365

  getting off any, 491

  Gremlin and, 326, 371

  a haughty, 214

  intimacy and, 488

  living within a, 480, map of, 481

  low drama victim, 210, 256, 290, 488

  of necessity, 316i

  in ordinary relationship, 39

  in patriarchy, 51, 57-58

  rigid, 435

  war and, 487

  “positive” feelings, 92-97

  Possibility,

  avoiding, 79-80

  as a Bright Principle, 505, 361

  context of, 177-178

  creating, 152, 360-366

  listening, 164-166, 505, map of, 165

  Map of, 361

  paint brush, 504

  speaking, 172, 506, map of, 171

  stone, 506

  team, 506; also see: meeting technology

  trainer, 506-507

  wand, 139, 150, 507

  possibility tool belt, see: tool belt

  Possibility Laboratory (training), 4-5, 173, 498-499

  Possibility Management, 5-7, 484-485, terms, 484-515, 505-506

  Possibility Manager, 506

  power, 116- 118, 336-337

  Practice,

  and Archetypal intimacy, 325-327

  and attention, 225, 239, 260-261, 294, 411, 457-459

  and Box reactions, 144, 181, 258, 328, 487, 509

  and being a space, 413, 416, 485

  and being irresistible, 334-337

  and “being killed and not dying,” 273

  and being Pirate … Man, 295-308

  and being Pirate … Woman, 278-281

  and being-with, 411

  as a Bright Principle, 487

  and bringing life to life, 228

  and bringing Woman to life, 427-430

  and building matrix, 15-16, 229, 501, 507

  and centering, 173-176

  and communications, 154-163

  and conserving energy, 262-263

  and Edgework, 221-230, 492

  and feeling communication, 176-183, 188

  and feeling with a coach, 97

  and the Goddess, 424

  and gorilla basics, 291-294

  and Gremlin, 368-370, 495-496

  and heaven, 254

  an
d holding double space, 269, 294

  and holding space, 444

  and inner navigating, 97, 497-498

  until last breath, 214-215, 337

  and listening, 153-160

  and low drama, 185-186, 499-500

  and making boundaries, 192-199

  and Manmaking, 281-291

  and meta-conversations, 149-153

  and navigating Heart of Labyrinth, 254

  and “Nine-Cowing,” 386-392

  and ordinary relationship, 38-50

  and overwhelm, 113

  and pain, 265-266

  and patience, 23

  and radiant joy, 15, 441-444, 477, 478-480

  and responsibility, 111-113

  and rite of passage and, 70

  and self-sitting, 401-403, 509

  and simply noticing, 55-56

  and soft skills, 20, 120-124

  and speaking, 170-173, 237

  in a study group, 7

  and thinking loops, 105

  and together-sitting, 403-404, 513

  and trying your best, 8

  and Western culture, 233-234

  and writing, 20

  praise, 34

  Prajnanpad, Swami, 70, 313, 508

  presence,

  accumulating, 341

  authenticity and, 129

  being, 132

  being together and, 273

  with children, 90, 198-200

  contact and, 413

  energetic body and, 90, 494, 510

  feminine, 291, 303, 450

  of Goddess, 280, 294, 420, 421

  of God, 337

  of Gremlin, 495-496

  growth of, 132

  of love, 228, 253, 434

  masculine, 304

  of mind, 214, 280, 299

  of partner, 238, 333, 335, 434, 458, 473, 478

  of presence, 394

  relationship intelligence and, 30

  of saints, 91, 235

  primate tendencies, see: gorilla basics

  Princess Bride (film), 179, 249

  Principles,

  as Archetypal forces of nature, 4, 141, 331, 364, 507

  and Archetypal Man, 269

  and artifacts, 431

  and authenticity, 129-130

  called into a space, 142, 204, 253, 296

  and choice, 366

  of communication, 154

  conscious / unconscious, 255, 361

  and discussion, 170-172

  and feelings, 96, 353-354

  and Gremlin, 185, 217, 315, 366-372, 473

  high / low drama and, 154, 184, 361, 496-497, 499-500

  of love / friendship / sex, 247-248

  Principle of, 249

  and possibility speaking, 172

  and receiving appreciation / gratitude, 333

  responsible / irresponsible, 142, 215, 316, 361, 364

  and self-sitting, 403

  and Spiritual Warrior or Warrioress, 297

  and trainers, 72-73

  voices of, 403

  and Western culture, 330, 418

  also see: Archetypal Love, destiny, force of nature, Hidden Purpose, holding space, Map of Possibility

  problems,

  and intimacy, 507, 514-515

  “no such thing as,” 315, 360, 489, 507

  and Problem Ownership, 159-161, Map of, 160

  and paradise, 315

  as stepping stones, 332