and solution, 501, 507
as theater, 507
projection, 453, 507
psychic sex, 444-450
psychology,
abusing, 217, 276, 456, 465
and Box, 81-88, 137, 224, 293, 379, 433, 435, 443, 466, 487, Map of, 81
context of, 5-6, 177-178, 355, 508
of denial and drivers, 130-131
and exopsychology, 56
and four bodies, 494
healing of, 279
and Jung’s archetypes, 5, 484-485
of misidentification, 32-33, 56-57
and needs, 119, 432, 479, 480
new age, 348
and ordinary relationship, 39, 42, 43, 44, 45, 47, 469, 497, 514
processing, 283, 290
and rite of passage, 66
and Western culture, 64, 493-494
and writing, 20
as virtual reality, 360, 507
also see: Box, Box mechanics, thoughtware
purpose,
of Adult communication, 154
of Archetypal relationship, 248, 304
of this book, 342-343
of Box, 81, 82, 221-222
conscious or unconscious, 77, 196, 267, 318, 361-366, 389
of conversation, 150
of family, 455-457
of a gameworld, 494-495
of Gremlin, 495-496
of being hooked, 497
of Manmaking, 287
of misidentification, 56
and motivation, 507-508
of Principles, 142
of relationship, 128, 311-313, 326
of self-sitting, 401-403
of a space, 252-253
of story, 361
of universe, 468-471
also see: Hidden Purpose, True Purpose
Q
Queen Archetype, 102, 164-166, 224, 280, 355, 361
in Bright world, 484-485
and Shadow world King, 495-496
also see: Archetypal Woman, Adult, Gremlin, King Archetype
questions, 164, 490, 508; also see: dangerous questions
R
radiant joy brilliant love,
context of, 2, 3, 244, 292, 309, 401, 424, 434, 479
and Countenance, 478-479
entering, 23, 245, 278-279, 295, 316, 331, 336, 429, 441-442, 450
and expansive learning, 15
and longing, 7
and parenting, 451-452
and patriarchy, 359
radical responsibility, 508
in Archetypal Love, 359
in Archetypal relationship, 312, 338
for choices, 325
for feelings, 317-318
is fun, 336
in Map of Possibility, 360-366
in parallel cultures, 316
as a Pirate, 279
for representing Archetypal forces, 313-321
in rite of passage, 65
for stories, 318-321
in Winning Happening, 365
also see: responsibility
Rapid Learning, 508, Map of, 191
real question, 508
reality, 252, 432, 508
reasons,
and our own authority, 103, 210, 219, 241
and beliefs, 487
beyond, 16, 20, 24, 68, 79, 91, 95, map of, 96, 113, 366
and boundaries with children, 198
and Box, 472
decisions and, 218, 443, 507, 514
for ending a relationship, 217-218
fear and, 100
to hate men, 23, 58
for jumping from guide to guide, 69-70
and linearity, 499
and memes, 501
ordinary, 38, 40, 41, 42, 43,45,48, 76, 81, 86
for putting book down, 67
and responsibility, 217
also see: linear, no reason, unreasonable, nonlinear
recapitulating, 255-257, 401, 447
reinventing reality, 388-392, 508
relationship
definition of, 509
ending / dying of, 189, 217, 464-473, 497
enmeshed, 399
and intimacy, 323-324
intelligence, 5, 8, 15, 30, 38
Map of Archetypal__, 401
Map of Child to Adolescent, 398
Map of Early Adolescent, 398
Map of Extraordinary Human__, 400
Map of Later Adolescent, 399
Map of __as High Drama, 400
Map of the Purpose of, 312
Map of Three Kinds of, 29, 110, 310
as nonlinear, 80, 209, 228, 333, 482, 502, 509, 514
“no such thing as,” 322
also see: conscious theater, high drama
reinventing people, 385-392, 502, 508
relationship intelligence, 5, 15, 30, 38
reminding factor, 241, 266, 283, 314, 509
remorse, 262, 266, 321, 366-367
reordering (Prigogine), 21, 105, 128, 241, 254, 263, 420, 478
Requiem, 474-475
rescuer,
high drama, 260, 335, 337, 352
low drama, 35-38, 147, 184, 361, 363, 499-500, 509, 514
resentment,
ancient, 300
and choice, 352
and energy, 222, 480
and Gremlin, 217, 473
and feelings work, 101
and intimacy, 217
kills relationship, 472-473
as low drama, 37, 184, 499
as negative attention, 197
as obstacle to Countenance, 417
and other person, 289
resolving, 289
as Shadow Principle, 361, 364, 510
unconscious, 471, 473
and victim stories, 319
responsibility, (Note: This is a book about responsibility, what it is, how to take it, what we do to try to avoid it. Only a sampling of the major references to responsibility are listed here.)
avoiding, 111, 256-257
and Bright Principles, 142, 364-366
and change, 186
and choosing to stay, 472-473
and consciousness, 364
for destiny, 372-377
for Gremlin, 368-372
and guilt, 266
and parenting, 451-463
and participation, 112
and practice, 111-113
and reasons, 217-218
for responsibility, 509
and story making, 318-321, 509
taking, 246-247, 315
for underworld, 350-353
and Western culture, 316
also see: radical responsibility, high drama, low drama, irresponsibility, victim, Possibility, Map of
restricting sphincters, 375-377, Map of, 376
results,
new actions and, 124-125, 202, 513
from clarity vs. boundaries, 195, 269
do not lie, 77, 114, 507-508
Map of, 202
not guaranteed, 121
through micro-experiments, 113
revenge, 184
right / wrong (Shadow Principle), 361
rite of passage,
and Box, 82, 152, 492
and creating what matters, 190
and hero’s journey, 352
and stellating Archetypes, 102, 353-357, 484-485, 495, 511-512
and Western culture, 64-73, 398, 460-461, 486, 487
women’s advantage with, 358
rituals, 460-463, 474-475
roadblocks (Gordon), see: twelve roadblocks
Robert’s Rules of Order (Robert), 501
rules,
Archetypal, 317
beyond, 150
in this book, 6, 109, 311
and Box, 81, 143
breaking, 148-149, 283
choosing, 125, 403
and Gremlin, 371
learning new, 327
and linearity, 201
and nits, 149
and nonlinearity, 505
and patriarchy, 55
&nbs
p; and Pirates, 279, 295-296, 305, 505
and radical responsibility, 325
Rumpelstiltskin, 367
S
sanctuary, 328-329, 430-431
Saint, The (film), 448
sanity, 80, 277, 473
Santa Claus, 85-88, 343
say no, say yes, 94, 96, 148, 159, 186, 187-188, 279, 297
scarcity,
and abundance, 214
and Gremlin, 495-496
in I win, you lose games, 365
and low drama, 184
of love, 119, 246, 247, 499, 509
and misidentification, 56-57
of nurturing, 83
of resources, 363
as a Shadow Principle, 361, 364, 510
in technopenuriaphobia (TPP), 230-233
of time, 459-460, 502
schadenfreude, 99, 229, 503; also see: Gremlin, mixing feelings, Shadow Principles
Schiff, Jacqui, 92
self-deception, 99-101, 191-192
self-sitting, 401-403, 509-510; also see: practice, together-sitting
separating feelings, 97-99
separation, an illusion, 19-20
serving,
Bright Principles, 161, 172, 304, 330, 338, 351, 487, 492, 496, 506, maps of, 332 and 361
as center of gameworld, 374, 494-495
conscious / unconscious purposes, 77, 389, map of, 361
destiny, 74, 485, 490-491
others, 281
self, 331, 374
Shadow Principles, 356, 366-368, 495-496, map of, 361
something greater, 326, 330, 331, 507, map of, 365
space, 254
as starmaker, 511
also see: destiny, gameworld, Gremlin
seven core skills of Possibility Manager, see: core skills
sex,
and adolescents, 398
Archetypal, 428
and being turned on, 334-337
better than, 479
born sexy, 103
and childhood emptiness, 34
the chamber for, 333-334
computer / Internet, 448
consumer, 61
and Countenance, 443
and fashion, 293
fighting and fucking in, 323
and the “good girl,” 292-293, 406
and gorilla, 292-293, 406
and Gremlin, 186, 305
and leading the Man, 430
and longing in men, 271
impersonal, 24
and inadequacies, 357, 359
in middleworld, 347
ordinary, extraordinary, Archetypal 60-61, 247-248, 326-327
in patriarchy, 53
psychic, 444-450
responsible, 448
safe and sensual, 303
and Viagra, 311
unmarried, 469-470
in upperworld, 347-348
and voices in head, 115
sexual abuse, 236-237, 370; also see: abuse
Shadow world (worlders), 36, 510; also see: Bright Principle, Gremlin, Hidden Purpose, Map of Possibility, underworld
Shadow Principle,
and Archetypal forces of nature, 363-364, 484-485, 507, 510
and Archetypal relationship, 312
and Box mechanics, 196
and defensive context, 490
and discussion, 170-172, map of, 171
and fuel, 141
and gameworlds, map of, 373, 487-488
and good vs. bad, 321, 364
and Gremlin, 185, 214, 217, 315, 350, 366-372, 431
and Hidden Purpose, 321, 350, 367, 368, 496, 514
and holding space, 254, 304, 497
and irresponsibility, 142, 296, 364, 500, 510
and low drama, 184-185, 361, 499-500
and Low Drama Detector, Map of, 184
and Manmaking, 293
and patriarchy, 296
and resentment, 473
and slave or servant, 296, 312, 366, 491
and terminology, 330, 363-364
and underworld, 349-350, maps of, 350 and 361
and victim stories, 512, 515
Shadowlands, 351-352, 381
Shaw, George Bernard, 4, 266, 331-332, 337, 507
Sheldrake, Rupert, 503
shift,
to Archetypal, 316-317
assemblage points, 377, 510
basis for, 29
of context, 67, 246, 321
the game, 282-283
identity, see: identity
purpose of Box, 82
in Rapid Learning, 191, 510
also see: Rapid Learning
sitting, see: self-sitting, together-sitting
slave or servant, 296, 312, 366, 491
soft skills, 120-122, Map of, 122
Sorceress Archetype, see: Creator Archetype
soul, 208, 510; also see: four bodies
sourcing,
Archetypal love and, 250
Archetypes, 511-512
clarity / novelty, 332
conflicts, 203
consciousness, 250
creation, 228
ecstasy, 395
experiments, 227
Gremlin and, 371-372
happiness, 210
high drama, 500, 509
love, 25, 80, 247, 482, 499
memetic viruses, 501-502
neutrality, 360
obstacles to Countenance, 417
ordinary relationship, 214
perception and intuition, 269
possibility, 4, 355, 497, 506-507
problems, 76-77
rigidity, 226
relationship, 80
resources, 361, 365-366, 374, 408, 494-495, 499, 511, 515
responsibility, 65, 111-112, 117, 297
scarcity, 363
stories, 96
the underworld, 350-353
the “way things are,” 425
wisdom, 290
space, 140-142, 510
and Principles, 142, 373
children and, 153
holding and navigating, 140-142, 253-255, 326-32, 497, 503
Map of Navigating Space of Relationship, 2, 140
also see: holding space
speaking, five kinds of, 170-174, Map of, 171
spiritual body, 90-91
Spiritual Materialism (Trungpa), 214
Springscreen (Göbel), 139, 510-511
standard human intelligence thoughtware, 60-61, 85-87, 227, 316, 325, 500, 511
star, 102, 354, 373-377, 511; also see: game-world, stellating
starmaker, 487-488, 511; also see: Possibility
Trainer, stellating, destiny
stellating Archetypes, 102, 172, 353-357, 358, 366, 374-376, 414, 511-512
Map of, 354
stories,
authority and, 7
and Box, 128, 143, 196, 224
creating, 512
and evidence, 389
exaggerating, 45
as gameworlds, 54
and men, 208
meaning and, 96
Map of, 320
nonlinear, 201-202
peeling away, 256
and possibility wand, 150
radical responsibility for, 318-321
responsible, 509
time and, 118
stress,
and building matrix, 23, 147, 221, 375, 501, 507
and care of self, 147-148
and intimacy, 212
as irresponsibility detector, 147
self-sitting and, 401
social and energetic, 451
and soul, 510
and Western culture, 58
and Archetypal woman, 260, 420-421
and boundaries with children, 198
and Box, 81-84, 172, 203-204, 222-223, 311-312, map of, 81
and your center, 173-176
and Countenance, 415
and decisions, 187
and drivers, 130-131
and evolution, 105
and Gremlin, 36
6
and herd behavior, 22
and low drama, 37, 184
and misidentification, 56, 77
and nits, 148
and ordinary relationship, 44, 75
and Parent ego state, 34-35, 114
and patriarchy, 60-61, 63-64, 67, 279
and rite of passage, 65, 67, 336
and scarcity, 363-364
and stellating Archetypes, 353-355, map of, 354
and “walking on eggshells,” 160
and war among women, 53
also see: high drama
swamp, 191, 512; also see: Rapid Learning, voices in your head
sword of clarity, 512
as awakeness, 214-215
and Aikido, 176
becoming a, 289-299
and boundaries, 193, 270
and Goddess, 421
and holding space, 304-308
and low drama detector, 184
obstacles and, 416-417
in radical honesty, 219
for saying yes / no, 159, 187
sharpness of, 313-317
for staying unhookable, 139
of the Warrioress, 280
T
taking action, 251-252
tantrums, 160, 299, 454
Technology of Beliefs, Map of, 135
technophobia, 230
technopenuriaphobia (TPP) 230-234, 513
Map of __ Detection, 232
Map of __ Healing, 233
Teresa, Mother, 132, 288
theater, conscious, see: conscious theater
thought-map,
Box and, 487
and Europe, 250
inner navigation and, 497-498
interaction with, 346
energetic diagram and, 513
of relationship, 250
and options / possibilities, 30, 140-141
results from, 202
in Possibility Management, 500
standard human intelligence thoughtware and, 511
new territory and, 503
new world and, 93-94
thoughtware, 5, 325, 498, 500, 501, 511, 513; also see: standard human intelligence thoughtware, meme
Three Kinds of Games, Map of, 365
Three Kinds of Relationship, Map of, 29, 110, 310
“three seconds,”
action / non-action in, 54, 149
“ancient” and, 300
and Box stories, 318
cleaning space every, 139
creating Love every, 482
echo fading within, 272
“far distant” and, 502
liquid state and, 127
pain and, 486
possibilities in every, 216, 491
reactions in, 144
reinvention and, 75
time,
making, 459-460, 500
taking, 20-21
together-sitting, 403-404, 444, 513; also see: self-sitting, practice
Tonic Gold™, 16, 501, 513; also see: building matrix
tool belt, 185, 513-514
trainer (Possibility Trainer), 5, 72-73, 97, 177-178, 192, 283, 298, 506-507; also see: Possibility Management
Transactional Analysis (Berne), 22, 32-38, 92, 484, 499-500
True Love
definition of, 248-249
exchanging __ for revenge, 265
experiencing __ personally, 21, 249, 346, 477
Radiant Joy Brilliant Love Page 90
