A Lifetime to Share

by Kathleen Ball

  “It’s fine. Are you getting warm at all? How long have you been here?”

  “I’ll be just fine. I’ll leave if you want.”

  He stood. “Here let’s take off the top quilt. It’s soaked through and it’s not helping any.” He took it off and laid it over a couple other crates near the fire. “Have you slept at all? The snow will be falling all night.” He tried to make his voice sound gentle, but he wasn’t sure he succeeded.

  “Don’t worry about me. I bet you’re tired after a long day. Go ahead and get some sleep. I’ve been without sleep before and survived and now that I have a fire to keep me warm everything is good.”

  Smitty climbed out of the wagon. “I thought I heard voices.” He grabbed the coffee pot out of the back of the wagon. “I’ll put this on, and it’ll warm you through.” He glanced from Eli to Amelia. “The both of you. Now I’m sorry to say I was eavesdropping on your conversation. Not an easy thing in the howling wind but I’ve had my share of sleep. Amelia why don’t you just take my bunk?”

  She started to shake her head but Eli stood scooped her up once again and deposited her inside the wagon.

  “We’ll all feel better if you’re the one who is warm. I can grab some shuteye tomorrow. Please?”

  She stared into his eyes as though she was waiting for him to say more. Finally she nodded. “If you’re sure…”

  Eli smiled. “Positive. Now sleep."

  Chapter Two

  The wind was frigid but at least the snow had stopped. Eli groaned when he saw the commotion at Smitty’s wagon. He’d just spent the last few hours getting all the livestock that wasn’t needed to pull wagons to go ahead of them on the trail. They’d blaze through and make a path for the wagons to follow. It still wasn’t going to be easy going, but they’d make it.

  People had begun to crowd around Smitty, Amelia, and her parents. Dang it! Now the Cruthers decided to be concerned about their daughter? He strode toward them. Before he even greeted them, he turned back to the other wagons. “You all need to get ready to go. A path is being made, and we can leave in a few minutes.”

  People hesitated, some looking a bit lost, most looking overly interested in what was going on with the Cruthers.

  “Please, go on. This is not your business.” He waited until the crowd dispersed.

  “You didn’t need to shoo everyone away!” Cheryl lashed out. “They were witnesses to your lewd behavior.”

  Benjamin Cruthers stepped forward. “We are a fine God-fearing family, and you take our girl in the middle of the night?”

  Eli widened his stance. “Yes I did. I found her here at our fire trying to stay warm. I made sure to warn every family that everyone needed to be inside of the wagon if possible.”

  Cheryl opened her mouth, but Eli raised a hand to stop her.

  “There was room in your wagon and don’t deny it. Amelia was half frozen and in danger of frostbite. I put her in our wagon with Smitty guarding her. I really don’t understand your outrage after you’ve shown such disregard for her safety. If anything, I’m angry about your treatment of your daughter.”

  “If you compromised her—” Benjamin squared his shoulders and puffed out his chest as if readying for a fight.

  “I can assure you I have no interest in your daughter.”

  Amelia stepped forward, her face was as white as the snow on the ground. “I know you don’t have any interest in me.” She turned toward her parents. “You of all people know that no man would give me a second look. You’re just angry because I went against your wishes and decided I needed to get warm. It was much colder than you probably imagined.”

  “She’s right, Cheryl. I can’t imagine anything improper happened,” her father said. “Come on, Amelia, we have to get ready to leave.”

  Amelia nodded then turned toward Eli. “Thank you for your kindness. I’m sorry I brought trouble to your door.”

  Eli’s heart twisted as he watched her walk behind her parents back to their wagon. Why would they think that no man would ever want her? They had her believing it too. A small smile came to him. He did see a small spark of anger in her eyes. Good. She’d need it to survive.

  The cold day was endless. Each step brought her excruciating pain. Bad weather always made her hip flare up. She’d shortened her dresses as instructed before the trip but snow caked onto her hem and weighed her down. No matter what, she had to keep up with her parent’s wagon. They were angry enough at her. Her punishment was to go without food for the day. She wasn’t hungry anyway. The noon stop had been canceled so they could go as far as they could while the weather held. She prayed there wouldn’t be another storm.

  They followed the ruts in the snow made by the other wagons before them; still it made for hard walking. She’d fallen at least five times already, but she had no choice but to go on. Besides, plenty of others were walking too. She always prided herself on being able to do almost anything that everyone else could do.

  By late afternoon, much of the trail’s surface had become ice. The snow had melted a bit but the temperatures were falling again. Looking around she saw others having a hard time too, but they were all walking with at least one other person. Everyone seemed ready and willing to help one another, and it hurt her soul that she was alone.

  Much to her relief she hadn’t seen Eli Todd. It was bad enough for her parents to say no one wanted her but to hear Eli say it… It was too much to think about. Part of her always thought that maybe just maybe her parents were wrong. But Eli confirmed it. The preacher said that God didn’t make mistakes. She knew differently.

  Finally, the wagons circled and she took a deep breath. Now all she had to do was survive another night. She scurried to her parent’s wagon, where she’d been careful to keep a supply of dry wood, and started grabbing some for the fire. Once she had her fire started, she put the coffee on, made the biscuits, and cut all the ingredients needed for a stew. Her stomach rumbled, but she didn’t dare put any of the food in her mouth. Perhaps if she was lucky she’d be able to have some coffee.

  Next, she took the oxen and made sure they had water and then she rubbed them down with an old cloth talking to them the whole time. Their dark eyes were so gentle and she swore they knew what she was saying. She’d always wanted a horse, but she wouldn’t have been able to ride one.

  On her way back to her wagon, Reverend Otter stopped her. “I need to talk to you,” he said.

  Amelia stood in front of him waiting for him to speak. He was probably going to chastise her for her behavior last night. She really didn’t want to hear it.

  “Are you alright? I saw you fall many times today.”

  “I’m fine. My hip gives me some trouble but I’m used to it.”

  “Are you certain? Is there anything I can do?” His stare unnerved her. It was though he knew how she suffered.

  “I’m fine. Thank you for asking.” She stepped around him and continued on to her wagon. Unfortunately, her mother had seen her talking to the reverend.

  “Did you tell him you were hungry or needed to rest? Did you tell him you were cold?”

  She shook her head. “No, ma’am, of course not. I’d never say anything about our family. I need to tend to the stew.”

  Her mother nodded and sat back down on her crate. It was unnerving to work with her mother and father eyeing her with suspicion. She’d done nothing to deserve it. But that didn’t matter. She’d be fine when the weather got better.

  Jed was talking but Eli wasn’t listening. He couldn’t keep his mind off poor Amelia. It always amazed him when people weren’t grateful for those around them. Didn’t they realize how life and death changed things in seconds? Unfortunately, many of them would learn the hard way during their journey west.

  What caused Amelia to limp? It was noticeably worse in the cold weather. The trek today had been grueling on all of them, but somehow it seemed much worse for Amelia.

  “Then the lions came charging and I shot them.”

  Eli shook
his head. “What?”

  Jed laughed. “I knew you weren’t listening to me. Guard duty is all set, and you have the night off. I know you didn’t get any sleep last night. What’s the story with that little gal anyway?”

  “I really don’t know much. Her parents treat her as a workhorse they don’t like. She has a limp but other than that...” He shook his head. “I don’t know much at all.”

  Jed nodded. “She seems nice enough.”

  “She does. Are we getting any more snow?”

  “Not this week.” Jed winked and headed out into the dark beyond the circle of the wagons.

  The last trip to Oregon, a girl named Lily had been taken by Indians and ever since Jed asked anyone he saw if there was news. He sometimes rode off by himself, looking for any sign of her. Eli wasn’t so sure she was even still alive, but Jed had faith.

  Eli made it a point to stop by the Cruthers’ camp that evening. The reception he received was colder than the snow.

  “Is there something you needed?” Cheryl asked as she raised her right brow.

  “Just making sure everything is fine.” He couldn’t help but notice the filled plates in her and Benjamin’s laps while Amelia sat there without food. “Not hungry?” He stared at her until she looked up at him.

  “No. Not really. Thanks for asking, but we’re fine. I won’t be showing up at your fire again.” She quickly turned away from him.

  All was not right with the Cruthers family but it really wasn’t his business so long as they caused no disruptions and pulled their own weight. He touched the brim of his hat. “Have a good night.”

  He visited two more camps before a boy named Aaron Stills came running to him. “Whoa,” Eli said as he steadied the boy.

  “You gotta come! My ma and pa are sick.” Aaron tugged at Eli’s hand and soon they were both running to the Stills wagon.

  Eli knew right away from the smell that at least one of them was already dead. He looked into the wagon and there was Mindy Stills, coughing. She was wet from perspiration, and her skin appeared pasty. How long had they been sick?

  “Aaron run and get Mrs. Downey. She knows about healing.” Eli watched Aaron take off in the direction of the Downey wagon. He doubted there was much Mrs. Downey could do. He tied his bandana to cover his nose and mouth before he climbed in. He was right. Bob Stills was dead. He put his hand on Mindy’s forehead and quickly pulled it away. He’d never touched anyone hotter. She didn’t open her eyes so he climbed back out of the wagon and asked a few of the men gathering to dig two graves.

  Lynn Downey came running with a basket of herbs in her hand. She barely glimpsed at him before she climbed into the wagon. Less than a minute later, she poked her head out. “Eli, Bob is dead and Mindy won’t last much longer. I don’t want anyone else going into the wagon. I’m not sure what they have, but it could very well be contagious. Mindy has a death rattle and it may be the flu. Did you touch them?”

  He nodded.

  She reached into her basket and drew out a bar of soap. “Go wash your hands and take Aaron with you. Make sure he washes good. Then we’ll have the men who bury them wash afterwards. It’s the best I can do. I swear they were fine before the storm. I’ve been busy with my brood.”

  Eli accepted the soap and took Aaron with him to the creek nearby. He washed up and helped Aaron. The poor boy was beside himself but trying his darnedest not to cry.

  “I know what it’s like to lose your parents, Aaron. The same thing happened to me and my brothers. They both died in a flash flood. It’s hard to get through, but you just have to keep going.”

  “My ma isn’t dead.”

  “That’s true. Let’s head back and see how she is.”

  They met Lynn Downey on their way. There were tears in her eyes when she shook her head. “I’m so sorry. I’ll need the soap. Aaron, don’t go back into the wagon. I don’t want you to get sick. You can stay with me and mine tonight.”

  “Thanks for your help,” Eli said.

  She nodded, took the soap, and headed toward the creek.

  By now, it looked as though the whole party had come to see what was happening. Amelia was the first to step forward. She took Aaron’s hand and stood next to him as the men lifted the bodies out. At one point, she hugged him to her, giving him comfort. Then Cheryl Cruthers pulled their hands apart and half dragged Amelia back to their wagon.

  Eli shook his head. What was wrong with Amelia helping the boy? He’d never understand some people. But he didn’t have time to dwell on the Cruthers. He had two bodies to bury and possibly a wagon to burn. He was grateful Lynn offered to take the boy for the night. She was a widow in her thirties with fading blond hair and deep blue eyes. She and her husband had adopted all four of the boys before her husband died.

  He waited for Lynn to return. He wanted her opinion as to whether he needed to burn the wagon or not. She seemed to think it the best idea. Eli’s heart hurt for poor Aaron. He’d lost his parents and all of his belongings in one night.

  He watched as the Downey’s surrounded Aaron and led him to their wagon.

  “Rough night,” Jed said as he walked up beside Eli. They watched as the wagon was set to burn.

  “Almost too rough. You were about Aaron’s age when our folks died.”

  Jed nodded. “At least I had you and Mike to see me through.” A grin slid over his face. “ I wonder what Mike’s doing right now.”

  Eli smiled. “He’s probably tucked in nice and warm with Susan and enjoying every minute of it.”

  “You don’t think he misses the trail?”

  Eli shook his head. “If I had someone to love who loved me back the way Mike has Susan, I’d never leave.”

  Jed shrugged. “I suppose.”

  “Keep an eye on the fire for me? I don’t want it spreading. There are a few wagons I need to check on. I can’t believe I didn’t know the Stills were sick.”

  “Aaron drove most of the day. Don’t beat yourself up, Eli. There’s nothing strange about a boy that age driving a wagon.”

  Eli nodded but he still felt guilty. He wanted to make sure the rest of the folks were healthy, and he wanted to see if Amelia was sleeping under the wagon. It wasn’t as cold as last night and he wouldn’t put it past her parents.

  He checked on everyone and so far no one else was sick. Now on to the Cruthers’. He saw her huddled by the fire from a ways away. What sin had she committed that was so bad that her parents wouldn’t take her into the wagon at night? Disgusted, he strode right to her. His heart flipped over in his chest when she gave him a sad smile.

  “Shh. I’ll catch it for sure if they hear you,” she whispered. She pulled her quilt tighter around her.

  He sat on the crate next to her and placed his hands in front of the fire to warm them. “How come you’re out here? I thought your parents said they’d keep you in the wagon tonight.”

  “That was before I embarrassed them by holding that boy’s hand. They think he’s diseased and I’d like nothing more than to make them sick. It’s not as cold as last night, so I’m fine.”

  “I thought it very nice what you did. Do you have an oil cloth to put beneath you?”

  She smiled. “Yes and extra quilts. The Otters gave me the quilts to use tonight. I was just warming up before going to bed. You don’t need to worry.”

  “It’s my job to worry. Are you sure you’ll be all right? You can come to one of my wagons…”

  “You’re a kind man. I’ll see you in the morning.” She stared into the fire as though he’d been dismissed.

  Reluctantly, he stood and made his way to Smitty’s. He was grateful for the fire, and for the coffee and food left for him. He wished there was something he could do for Amelia.

  Chapter Three

  The rushing water of the Platte River looked powerful. The notion of crossing it made Amelia queasy. Why hadn’t she ever learned to swim? It was too late now. They were last in line, and the waiting only added to her anxiety. Plus she wasn’t sure how
she was getting to the other side. They were being ferried over, and she only added to the cost of the ferry.

  In the last few weeks, the Cruthers announced it was their Christian duty to take poor Aaron Stills in. They hadn’t planned for another mouth to feed when they bought supplies so naturally Amelia’s portions were cut in half. He did take some of the work off her shoulders, and she never envied the food he got. He earned it. He took on the oxen, and he gathered the wood.

  He had a pleasant enough disposition, but there was so much sadness inside him. He was already in the wagon ready to cross and when he stuck his hand out to grab Amelia’s in order to help her inside, her mother slapped his hand.

  It was an eye-opening, heart-dropping moment. They’d rather not have her with them, but surely they didn’t intend to leave her on this side of the river. She walked to the front and looked up at her father. “Papa?”

  He pretended he didn’t hear her, and she was not about to beg. She’d been a beggar her whole life. She begged for attention, for love, for food, for clothing and they never willingly gave her anything. She was dispensable now that they had Aaron.

  Shamed, she walked to a large boulder near the river and climbed up on it. She watched as the wagons were put on the wobbling wooden scows and held her breathe as they were pulled across using a system of ropes. So far, two people ended up in the river but they were quickly rescued by Jed.

  She felt the heat of Eli’s gaze without even turning her head. She already knew she’d see pity in his eyes, and she couldn’t take it. Not today. He’d been kind to her and checked in with her parents every evening. It seemed to be his way of letting them know he was watching them. They huffed and complained about him incessantly. They didn’t see his kindness.

  He was devoted to getting them all to Oregon and so far, he’d done a good job, at least in her opinion. He took an interest in Aaron too and it made her parents crazy. They thought he was interfering and overbearing but Eli wasn’t like that. He was a kind man with a big heart. He had an authoritative air about him, and her parents didn’t like to admit that rules applied to them too.