CONVICTED
Page 22
“You ok?” she asked for a second time.
“This is the first time in this truck since my girlfriend was killed.”
I wouldn’t lie. I baited her. Would she come clean and tell me about Abby?
“It happened in this truck?”
“Yes. Brax fixed it, cleaned it and had it ready for me when I was released.”
“He’s very good to you.”
“Yep. What happened with my father?”
“Nothing. I swear. He was showing me down a hallway, and I saw a mouse, started to turn around because I had a not so good feeling. He reached for me, I think because he was falling. That’s how my shirt got ripped and his head hit my cheek.”
“You’re shaking.” I had no doubt she was holding back part of the story.
She shrugged. “I was scared. I’m still scared.”
“He won’t ever touch you again, Ren. Don’t be scared.”
“Your dad isn’t what I’m scared of.”
The darkness didn’t lend to my typical ability to read her. I wasn’t sure I knew Ren anymore. People change with time and time had passed between us.
“What scares you?” I asked.
I shot some kind of look her way. Street lights flickered over her face almost like a strobe light.
“Losing you.”
Even when I wasn’t looking her way, I knew she was looking mine. Gauging my responses.
“Not having you in my life,” she continued. “Living the next few years away from you. You not loving me anymore. I have so many questions.”
I cleared my throat. “I have a few of my own.”
“I’ll answer anything.”
“Do you still talk to Evan?”
“Not since the day they took you away. Like I told you, he’s the one that told my father.”
Sitting at a stoplight, I watched for the light to turn green and nodded. “I didn’t know that until today.”
“I told you in one of my letters. How did you think my dad found out?”
My glance was heavy with accusations.
“Me?” her voice shot up. “I wouldn’t have ever done that, Joss.”
Not until that minute did I truly believe that.
“Did you just not believe me in the letter?”
I parked the truck next to the curb in front of Brax and Ella’s. I didn’t want to tell her I hadn’t read a single word she wrote.
“Come on,” I grumbled, getting out. She scrambled toward me. The lift on the truck was high, so I reached for her. Wrapping her arms around my neck, her body slid the length of mine. A soft moan seeped between her lips, causing my body to react.
“Ren,” I cautioned.
“You seem tense. I just want to lighten the mood.”
Nothing stood between us but the night air. “You want to lighten the mood, so you rubbed your body against mine?” I cocked a mocking brow.
“Well, I’d like for you to fuck me too,” she giggled, and I tried to find humor in her words. I swear, I tried. There was nothing funny to me about the thought of being inside her. I winced at her word choice. Being with her was so much more than that.
Her rounded, playful eyes led me to believe she didn’t understand the gravity of what I was feeling. With only two full steps forward, her back hit the side of the truck. I lifted her beneath her arms as her legs wrapped instinctively around my body. My dick pressed against the denim bursting to get out. Our lips crashed together, taking only a second to reconnect and understand who was on the other end of the kiss before familiarity settled in. With her back pressed up against the metal, my hands ravaged through her hair as my senses became fully aware of her. The smell. The taste. The kiss. The sound of her noises.
Christ. This girl would forever be my undoing.
“Joss,” she panted between kisses while my small beard left a rough burn in its wake on her neck. I reached down to hold her in place, and my hands grabbed bare ass. My guess, her miniskirt had ridden up when she parted her legs to get them around me. Only adding fuel to my already lit fire, I squeezed both ass cheeks while deliberating in my head. One hand traced up the thong to the top of her ass. There was no way I was going to give her brain a second to say stop. Reaching through the rip of her t-shirt, I ripped it further, pulling down her bra on one side exposing her breast to me. Hoisting her up just a bit, my mouth covered her breast. Jesus, the softest skin known to man. When her head fell back, my other hand began to unfasten my jeans. The second I freed my cock, and I do mean the very second, my hand broke the barrier of the thong moving it to the side.
Her eyes widened, probably surprised that I was going to take her right here on the dark street. It didn’t matter to me where we were. Lifting her just a bit, I slowly navigated her body directly down—listening to her slight hiss as my body filled her. For the longest moment, I remained balls deep inside of her, relishing the feeling. I didn’t want to ever finish, but we were on the damn street.
“It’s been so long,” she whispered. “Don’t make me wait.”
“Ren,” I said softly, and slowly started to move in and out of her.
“Yes?” she asked between pants.
“How can you doubt that you’re mine?” My thrusts were a mix of me driving into her and her weight coming down on me. Heavenly.
“Ah,” she groaned and squeezed my shoulders. “It hurts, Joss.”
I slowed rearing back and staring at her. “Stop?”
She shook her head. “Never. I’m just going to be sore. Go slow.”
“Good,” I moaned, pressing into her, hearing her yelp. “It’s been too long. I’m gonna come quick,” I said.
“No, I want to too,” she argued as my pace quickened.
“Oh, you will. But not right now.” My body tightened, holding her ass in place as I was overtaken with pure pleasure. Nine months on the ranch. Four and a half months in the pen. I needed this. “Don’t you know, I will always please you.”
“Joss, please. I need you.” She arched her hips back and forth.
I chuckled into her hair as I neared detonation. “Fuck, baby.” My body released beautifully into hers—I filled her with every last drop of mine. My legs trembled momentarily as her forehead rested on my shoulder.
“I wanted to too,” she whined.
Keeping her in place, I ground myself into her. “Ren.”
“What?”
I redirected the little strands of hair curled around her cheeks, so I could see her beautiful face. “Your father was put on this earth to spoil you and give you what you think you want. I’m here to give you what you need.” I smiled pecking the tip of her nose.
“I need you,” she hummed, her body full of need and want which is exactly where I wanted her.
“And you will have me.”
Chapter 42
Regret…
Ren
ADJUSTING MY CLOTHES and wearing his t-shirt since he literally destroyed mine, I put my hand in his. I swear, I’d follow him anywhere. I wasn’t sure where we were but the motorcycle from earlier sat in the drive.
Brax and the girl that was with him the night I told Brax about Joss going to prison sat on the sofa snuggled up together.
“Ella, this is Ren. We are going to my room to talk.”
“Nice to meet you,” Ella said.
She was very pretty, and I offered her a smile as Joss nearly pulled my arm out of socket. “You too,” I said as I was being hauled down the hallway. Happy that he must have had the same thing on his mind that I did mine. My body continued to purr with anticipation.
Joss turned into a bedroom and closed the door.
“You’re living with Brax and Ella?”
“Yes. Until I can afford something else.”
I smiled.
“Why the smile?”
“It just makes me happy. You deserve so much.”
He found a shirt in his dresser and slid it over his head.
“You mean like the truth?”
I giggl
ed a bit. “Always. When have you not gotten that?” Who had lied to him?
“Don’t play games with me, Ren.”
My eyes shot up to his as my smile faded. “What?”
His back rested against the wood headboard, one foot on the bed, one on the floor. But seriously, time had done nothing but make him even hotter…sexier than ever. “Think, Ren. Surely there is something you feel like you need to tell me.”
My shoulders slowly jetted up into a shrug. “I don’t know. What is it you think I’ve lied about?”
Joss didn’t say anything—only tilted his head to the opposite side.
My eyes fell to my fiddling fingers in my lap. “Do you mean about the pregnancy test?” I chanced, looking back at him. “I wasn’t lying. I was truly scared.”
A deep v formed between his eyes when they pulled together. His back came up off the headboard. “Pregnancy test?” His Adam’s apple jutted out and back in.
“I wrote about it in one of my letters, Joss.”
Suddenly, he shot upright, turned to his dresser, opened the bottom drawer and pulled out a bundle that he tossed on the bed. Recognition flashed in an instant, the stationary, the stamps—my letters. None of them had been opened. I’d written nearly every single day to tell him I loved him. To make sure that he didn’t forget.
“You didn’t even open them?” My voice cracked.
“No.”
Completely stunned, I was at a loss for words. Angry and hurt, I grabbed the letters and bolted to the door. I didn’t know what else to do. This was devastating. The time. The energy. The love I’d poured into the letters. Before I could open the door, Joss’s hand pressed against it.
“I want to leave,” I said sniffling.
“No. You aren’t leaving, bird.”
His arms wrapped around my body, lifting me off the ground as we both moved back over to the bed. A fight would be futile. I sat on the bed and he knelt between my legs.
“Why? Why wouldn’t you have read them?” I asked softly tears falling again for the umpteenth time.
“I was angry. I thought you’d told your father about us. I thought it was your fault that I was back in prison. I didn’t know what had happened. What. Pregnancy. Test?”
I shook my head, wiping my nose with the back of my hand. With the rubber band still around the envelopes, I plucked through the ends until I found the one that I knew the letter was in. After freeing it, I handed him the letter.
The seriousness in his eyes caused my stomach to twist. He sat next to me.
Carefully, he tore the envelope.
Dear Joss,
I miss you so much it hurts. After hitting the three-week late mark, I decided to buy a pregnancy test. You have no idea how much I wish you were here to go through all of this with me. I was hoping you’d tell me what to do. I took it this morning. It was negative. I guess that can happen when you start the pill—being late and all. I know it’s stupid, but I cried. I mean, no one wants to be a freshman in college and pregnant but there was a small part of me that hoped. Please don’t be mad at that. I just don’t know if I’ve lost you. I love you Joss. I love you. Please write.
Forever,
Ren
(Your bird)
Joss folded the letter, slid it back into the envelope and closed his eyes.
“I’m sorry,” I whispered. I had no idea why I apologized.
With the bundle of letters in hand, he tossed them on top of the dresser and then knelt between my legs again. His thumbs swiped across my cheeks, drying tears I hadn’t realized fell.
“You’re sorry?” he asked, burying his cheek against my stomach exactly where a baby would grow. “Jesus, Ren.”
I held onto him, my fingers clawing at his head to get him as close as I could. We were both different people than who we were when this started a year ago. I never wanted Joss to hurt. He’d endured more hurt than most. I wanted to bring him joy.
“Please look at me,” I whispered, desperate to know what he was thinking. Dark, sad eyes rose to meet mine. Moisture beneath. I’d never seen Joss like this. “Oh, what I wouldn’t give to know what you’re thinking.”
“I’m so fucking sorry,” he choked between clenched teeth. “I should have read the letters. I should have written back. In my world, Ren, there is no logic behind you loving me. Our worlds collided, and for a moment, I thought I fit into yours.”
The top of his head rested between my breasts. I gripped his cheeks, forcing him to look at me.
“You do fit in mine. Perfectly. Don’t ever think differently.” I pecked his lips with the tenderest of kisses.
“No matter how wrong we were, no matter how wrong it was for me to love you, you somehow made it right. You,” he inhaled the deepest of breaths. “You make me feel like I’m enough.”
“As long as you’re mine, Joss, you’ll always be enough.” I smiled and bit down on my bottom lip.
“I wanna hear your lips whisper my name.”
“Joss,” I whispered, lingering on the s sound.
He shook his head. “No,” he said softly inching the mini skirt up my thighs and tugging my thong the opposite direction. My entire abdomen shuddered with need. “That’s not what I meant. I want my name to come out of your mouth involuntarily because I’m driving you crazy.”
I swallowed with expectation curling in my stomach.
“Lay back.”
Doing exactly as he said, I lay back. The little kisses he dropped on my thighs were only an appetizer, and I was starving. When his tongue finally met my warm wetness, I couldn’t help it…
“Josssss,” slid right off my tongue.
Chapter 43
Opportunities…
Joss
THOUGHTS OF ABBY being Ren’s cousin fluttered through my mind several times on the ride back to the ranch the next morning. Never long enough to take it up with her—not until I was alone and could read every last letter she wrote. That was my plan for that night.
Ren and I were driving to the ranch as a couple. I would be walking into that house as an equal. I’d never been there as an equal. Even last night, when I barreled into the house looking for a fight, I knew my place regardless of how I stood up to Cal. It was important to make Ren proud. To prove I wouldn’t let her down for believing in me. My role at the ranch had been a worker bee even if Cal wanted me as his son. Becoming comfortable in a different role would take time.
“Ren Briscoe,” Cal said the moment we walked in the door.
“Hi, Daddy.”
“Don’t hi daddy me. You know you don’t stay out all night without letting me know where you are.”
I couldn’t gauge how angry he was.
Ren swatted at his arm. “Don’t be silly, I was with Joss. Hi, Key,” she chimed, ignoring her father.
“I’m sorry, sir. I’ll make sure you know from here forward.”
“Joss, it’s Cal. Call me Cal.”
“Yes, sir. Yes, Cal.” I shook my head in an attempt to shake off my nerves.
Sal laughed from behind me. I spun around embarrassed. “Hey, Sal.”
“Nervous much, young’un?” he chuckled.
I rolled my eyes, silently praying to just find Ren. In the kitchen, Key greeted me with a hug.
“Someone seems very happy.” She tilted her head toward Ren. Ren’s smile grew. I was so glad that Key and Ren were ok.
“Joss, what are you doing in the city? Are you working?” Cal asked, coming into the kitchen.
“Right now, I’m doing landscaping just trying to save some money to get a place.”
Cal nodded. “What about working for me?”
I didn’t want to be a charity case. “What did you have in mind?”
“Well, the quarters out back would still be yours. Ren has to go back to college. You and Sal would be in charge of things here.”
“In charge?”
“Yes. You’d work side by side with Sal, taking care of things.”
That honestly wasn’t muc
h different than what we were doing before. I couldn’t just say yes as much as I wanted to jump at the chance. Being here was the happiest I’d ever been. But it also meant being here without Ren.
“I’m not sure. I need to talk to Brax. To Ren,” I glanced over at her sitting her pretty ass up on the countertop.
“Of course, you do. I understand.”
My thoughts raced with the opportunities. The pay. The possibilities. Looking around at the possible life in front of me that was almost too good to be true. Things like this didn’t happen for guys like me. I winked at Ren when her sexy smile radiated at me from clear across the kitchen. I’m not sure what sort of ride I was in for, but I knew I was definitely in for one.
Ren and I walked out by the pool. In all our time here, we hadn’t ever gone swimming. It seemed to be the central point of a lot of our interactions but never had we been in it together. It was going to take some getting used to doing what we wanted to do in front of everyone. Cal, Sal, Keyona. We’d hidden for so long.
Ren shed her clothes fast while I was taking off my jeans and boots. She winked at me as she dove into the deep end of the pool. That girl was perfection in my eyes.
I, of course, with a less dramatic entry into the pool, took the steps slowly immersing my body.
“You are so fucking hot,” she said spitting a mouth full of water at me.
I grabbed her foot as she tried to swim away, failing miserably. I yanked her my direction. I leaned in for a kiss and spit water right back at her as our lips met.
“Oh my God!” she screeched pushing away from me. “That was gross. You can’t do that.”
“Well, you can’t keep things from me,” I teased but was quite serious.
Her demeanor shifted as she wiped her face free from the water. “I don’t keep things from you.”
“Think about that before you say it, Ren.” My seriousness swaying the conversation.
She wrung her hair out as she stood in the shallower water.
“That’s the second time you’ve alluded to me not being truthful, Joss. Talk to me. Trust is everything.”
I didn’t want to do this. I didn’t want to sour the mood of the day. But I also knew that it needed to be addressed. If I didn’t say anything…if I kept it to myself…it would only hurt us.