Months later, a peer asks if she has anyone who could step into a new role. She says no. If she allows one of her staff to get a promotion, she will be left stranded because she doesn’t know how to do her job. She can’t afford to let anyone else know how good her staff members are.
Ingrid takes out a lot of her frustration on the junior staff members. She has been in the company for eight years and feels she deserves a promotion. She feels that she is overlooked when opportunities arise. She leaves work early quite often to pick up her kids from school, dumping boring admin tasks on Julia without warning. It’s clearly not Julia’s job to help Ingrid, but Ingrid is older and has been there longer. When Julia finally complains to a co-worker about what a bitch Ingrid is, they discover they have both been doing Ingrid’s dirty work for some time. Ingrid thinks these tasks are below her and that she is getting ready for the promotion she deserves. To her manager, Ingrid is a dull plodder.
It’s one thing for a woman to be successful in getting a role, but it doesn’t mean she has the skills to keep the role. The Incompetent is likely to backstab and blame you while tricking you into doing her work and simultaneously ruining your reputation. An Incompetent’s dominant characteristic is that she doesn’t do her job.
Some Incompetents haven’t quite realized that they don’t know what they are doing. They plod along, resisting the good ideas of staff and slowing down progress. They get nasty if you oppose or challenge their authority, and they can punish you for your enthusiasm because they feel threatened.
If a hands-on Incompetent is managing you, she is likely to be tricky to handle—her interference is irritating, counterproductive, and frustrating.
If a hands-off Incompetent is managing you, it can be quite good. If she keeps out of your way and lets you get on with things, you are freed up to do your job without a nuisance standing over your shoulder. The downside of this is that you don’t have a champion fighting for better resources or being instrumental in your career growth. You might resent the discrepancy in salary, given that you are performing the Incompetent’s duties without recognition or recompense.
It is usually quite easy to recognize the Incompetent’s behavior. Whether you’re working with or for her or managing her, you will eventually see the evidence building that she isn’t doing her job as well as it first appears. If you understand what is behind her behavior, you’ll be better equipped to protect yourself from the negative influence she can have on your career and your well-being.
The Incompetent’s Behavior
•She has often been promoted to a role in an area she hasn’t worked in before.
•She doesn’t bother to discuss her new role with colleagues or staff who report to her and makes sweeping changes or simplistic decisions due to lack of knowledge.
•She doesn’t understand the issues that are unique to your area.
•She often doesn’t know what she doesn’t know. She is only interested in the position for appearance; she’s not particularly interested in doing the job.
•She becomes impatient and annoyed when you try to painstakingly explain things to her. She pays you back with sanctions, withholding resources, finances, permission, or support.
•She seizes your ideas, reports, and research and presents them as her own.
•She trades on your professional loyalty to get you to do extra work so that she looks good.
•She is suspicious of you and your intentions; she fears that you want her role and that you might be better at it than her.
•She makes cringe-worthy public statements through incompetence and stomps on you if you try to clarify things.
•She allows illegal or dangerous, unsafe things to occur due to her lack of awareness but will be angry with you for pointing this out.
•She will portray you as the enemy, as someone who is resistant to change and development.
•She is likely to espouse reductionist views or follow the latest fad without thinking it through.
•She is likely to dump experienced senior staff members who know more than she does and to hire more-junior staff to establish her credibility.
•She might surround herself with bright sparks to make herself look good, taking the credit for their work and denigrating them so their self-esteem is lowered and they’re less likely to leave.
On one level, the Incompetent’s behavior is easy to identify because her skills and abilities fall short of what is required. Often, however, the Incompetent is so adept at covering up her inadequacies that it can take you a while to notice. If she is your boss, you might not be aware of your work being passed off as hers.
The following stories are situations experienced by real women in the workforce. Read them to see if you can recognize elements of your own situation and to help identify whether the mean girl in your workplace is an Incompetent.
Portia, 32, Service Industry
I worked for a supervisor who was put in a management position without any management experience. I think the stress of the position made her very paranoid, and she resorted to aggressive disciplinary action. She issued me a written warning without ascertaining the circumstances after an incident in which colleagues stored a six-pack of beer in a fridge. Her manner toward me and other staff became almost petulant and certainly hostile as she began to view staff as her enemies. I took some time off on leave and returned to the organization after the supervisor was let go.
Ellie, 39, Engineering
I was the new worker, and I enjoyed the initial meeting, where Nicole suggested the attendees go round the table introducing themselves and outlining their background and expertise. I mentioned that I had held a similar role to Nicole’s in a smaller company.
“Yes, well, I’ll be reviewing your probationary period closely,” she said, and I wasn’t clear whether this was a good or bad thing.
One day I was clarifying some procedures outside Nicole’s glass office in the open-plan area. Nicole swept out, telling me to be quiet and not to stand outside her window ever again.
I had been employed to install a staff training model. Nicole checked with me whether I had everything under control, whether I’d designed everything, and whether it was ready to roll out.
“Yes,” I answered, “and I also changed the contracts so that we don’t specify the training course title.”
“Why?”
“It means we don’t have to draw up new contracts for every module they run. It also means we have backups where other contractors could come in to run a different module in case of illness.”
“Oh. Well, what happens if someone gets sick at the last minute?”
“As you know, as well as managing this function, I have also worked as a trainer. I can actually run nearly all of these modules myself if necessary.”
“Oh.”
Soon after, I was called in, with an offer to either fall on my sword or have the sword thrust in—either choose to leave today or get fired.
“But why?”
“I have a letter here that outlines how you have failed to heed repeated warnings regarding your behavior.”
“What?”
“Well, if you don’t leave now, I’ll be forced to act on this letter. You speak far too loudly, and there is a computer program that you don’t know about.”
I was aghast—the computer program wasn’t relevant to my role. But I saw no other option but to leave, given the vehemence of Nicole’s response. It took some time before I could stop worrying that perhaps I wasn’t professional enough—that I was coarse and did speak too loudly.
Tess, 33, Customer Service Management
I worked in a club with a restaurant when the position for reception coordinator was reworked and all suitable staff members were asked to apply or reapply for this position.
A waitress within the club had resigned, and she was a real bitch. After a week or two, she decided to return and was offered her job back, without the loss of any benefits such as holidays, et cetera.
We were advised that when doing front-of-house schedules, we were to include her in our scheduling so she could gain experience in other areas. We were a close team, and it felt like we had a spy among us, as the smallest error somehow always found its way back to upper management. This woman also applied for the position of reception coordinator, and although she held absolutely no qualifications in administration work, she was awarded the position.
At this time, HR made a decision to split the responsibilities to admin or reception or both. Because of bone cancer in my knees, I happily grabbed the chance to have a sit-down position utilizing my excellent skills in admin and customer service. The bitch then decided that anyone who only worked in admin would be offered sixteen hours per week instead of the normal twenty-six to thirty-four hours we all worked at the time. I accepted this, as did others. This is when the fun began.
Those of us she felt threatened by were given the graveyard shift, and then without warning, she decided that everyone should share the floor work. Needing the work, I had to either accept this or leave.
She scheduled herself on when it suited her social life. Her skills were so poor that three of us started keeping diaries of her serious mistakes. She was called on mistakes, but then made it her personal ambition to find fault with us. She felt threatened and knew we had her number over her inadequacies as the boss.
If we questioned a decision that was incorrect, she screamed, “Just fix it!” “Do as I say, not what I do!” or “I am the boss!”
She had overexaggerated her computer skills and was failing badly. But instead of admitting her failings, she lied, hid her errors, and blamed other staff members.
One evening shift when there was an important function, she had scheduled herself for it. We’d had enough of her boorish, condescending behavior, and the three of us handed in our resignations that night. She had the three of us immediately removed from our positions (we had included a week’s notice in our resignations), and we were escorted out of the building by security staff. She opted for the club to be left short-staffed to save her skin in case we spilled the beans.
We had exit discussions with management at a later date. We wanted to approach the union, but she also had this tied up as she was the union rep, so every complaint had to go through her. I had never encountered such bullish behavior in the workplace, so I was taken aback that someone could so easily lie to save her butt. I was good at my job, and she felt so threatened she needed to be devious.
I had previously had a career, and this was just a job to me—no taking work home, and I switched off at the end of a shift. I was sensible and applied for other positions while she was playing the she-devil.
She had wanted the job so badly she lied to get it, but once faced with her own inadequacy, she felt threatened by people who had the skills. From having a fully functioning team of nine, she made life so difficult it became a revolving door of resignations. She began employing people who had fewer skills so that her incompetence would be masked.
I moved on. The company kept calling, asking me back. It realized that she couldn’t do the job.
Tess worked with an Incompetent who also lied, screamed, and schemed. Her lying and screaming stemmed from her incompetence—she clearly did not have the skills to do the job she had schemed to get.
Odette, 50, Public Service
My new boss neither acknowledged my experience nor invited my contribution. As the work had dramatically expanded over the past year, by the time she arrived to fill the vacancy, I was fairly exhausted.
Not only did she elect not to avail herself of any of my expertise, but she actively dismissed all of my contributions. There were many instances where she flat-out refused to accept my explanation of something as fact, denying what I said as it did not fit with her own understanding. This was extremely frustrating, but ultimately I gave up trying to offer my views (or offering statements of fact!).
I found it extremely stressful and was at a loss to deal with it, other than to try to relinquish all decision-making input and influence I’d previously had. I do think it’s had a negative effect on my chances of advancement.
It was only after more than twelve months that she said she was worried I wasn’t coping with work. Yes, before she arrived I was struggling with the workload and subsequently I was struggling to cope with her not allowing me to have input! She confessed that from the time of her arrival, she had felt I wasn’t coping and admitted framing everything I ever said to her through that prism. She seemed quite genuinely concerned about me, and I don’t believe there was malice in her attitudes or actions.
Odette’s new boss failed to put her behavior into context and then failed to gather data, modify her initial assumptions, or have a talk about it. She was most probably out of her depth, and her poor judgment was the result of her own struggle to cope. Wires were certainly crossed, and valuable time and expertise were lost.
How Does the Incompetent Make You Feel?
She acts inefficient and ineffectual, belligerent, defensive, blaming, disinterested, obstinate, slow, lazy, neglectful, and stubborn.
You feel used, unappreciated, annoyed, resentful, and furious.
Physically, you feel tense and headachy.
Why Does the Incompetent Behave Like This?
No one consciously aims to be incompetent—incompetent behavior often results when a confident personality is mistaken as a competent person. Incompetence is sometimes a by-product of a manipulative personality who oversells her abilities and is not interested in the consequences of her behavior. There are two main reasons behind this type.
1. She Is in the Right Place at the Right Time
She rises up through the ranks because she’s often in the right place at the right time and is promoted beyond her competence. What starts as perhaps a lucky break becomes a lifetime habit of overselling her abilities.
2. She Is Good at Talking the Talk
She will get the promotion over someone with better skills, abilities, and experience because she is extremely good at telling people what they want to hear. Once she starts the new job, she becomes adept at using other people to do her work. She is usually unaware of her skill deficits, and if they are pointed out to her, she denies it vehemently. Sometimes the Incompetent’s characteristics cross over with those of the Liar.
How do people usually get the Incompetent out of an organization? Sadly, the most effective way is to make her someone else’s problem. She obtains a glowing reference from her workplace because people will say anything to get rid of her.
Is It Possible You’ve Got It Wrong?
In many workplaces, it’s common practice for the manager to sign off on a report. Her name might be the only one that appears on the report. Her boss doesn’t care who did the work—she is responsible for it, and that’s all that matters. It might look like she’s taking credit for what you’ve done, but she’s just following procedure. While this doesn’t seem fair, she’s not necessarily an Incompetent. Remember, to identify a type, you are looking for sustained behavioral patterns.
Dealing with the Incompetent
Don’t fret too much if she lacks specific knowledge of your field, people-management skills, or a willingness to develop them. If she feels out of depth with the specifics of the job, she might be trying to cover this up in any way she can, which might lead to bitchy behavior. But if you can find a nonthreatening way to help her skill up, you might be able to turn her around.
Assess whether your Incompetent wants to improve and has the capacity to improve—if she is happy not to bother, then it is unlikely that the situation will improve. If she is willing to improve her skills, make it easy for her to access short courses or relevant papers, to keep her apprised of up-to-date information in small chunks that she can digest.
If she’s not going to change, see if you can work around her. If your Incompetent is not a Screamer, she might be happy to be left alone. While it will be frustrating to see her being better paid th
an you, she might be happy with the job title and remuneration and the occasional theft of the credit for your work, mostly leaving you to get on with it.
Her underlying need is not for drama—that’s the domain of the Screamer and the Toxic. Helping her to find some peace will go a long way to making your life more bearable. She will probably leave you alone if she is in a good place emotionally, despite her incompetence.
What to Do When You Work with an Incompetent
•Making her look good eases the pressure in your working relationship. It’s easier said than done, of course.
•If you make her look good to her superiors, she may ease up on you and be more willing to listen to your recommendations.
•Find nonthreatening ways to help her learn the job. These might include taking advantage of coaches, mentors, or training programs. She is unlikely to read books but might read bullet-point summaries of relevant trends and information.
•Make sure that you are mentored or supervised by someone who is competent, and where possible, try to report to someone else who knows what they are doing.
•Expect her to take credit for what you do, if she is your boss or you work alongside her. You can make it hard for her to access what she needs to make herself look good at your expense, or decide that it’s easier to let some things go. Weigh up the cost to your well-being.
•Do not turn a blind eye to her incompetence if this puts people at risk—you have a duty of care to other employees.
•If she is hands-on, reassure her about outcomes and deadlines, and try to keep her busy elsewhere.
•Remember, if she is hands-off, she’ll leave you alone. However, when you’re successful, she’ll take the credit, and when you fail, you’ll take the blame. Keep good records of communication in case your accountability is questioned.
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