The Case of the Overdue Otterhound

by B R Snow

  “Yeah. What’s wrong with it?”

  “Nothing,” she said, shaking her head with a small smile. “You always rock Vintage Lumberjack. It looks good on you.”

  “Shut it.”

  “You’re going to sweat like crazy in that outfit. Why don’t you just borrow the one-piece you got Chef Claire for Christmas?”

  “No way,” I said. “You’ve seen how tight that thing is.”

  “So?”

  “It’s too…revealing.”

  “Suzy, you’d be covered from head to toe,” she said, frowning.

  “You know what I mean.”

  “Okay, have it your way. But don’t forget your chainsaw.”

  “Funny,” I said, gently punching her on the shoulder. “It’s going to be freezing out there.”

  “Maybe Cooter will make you a matching squirrel sweater,” Josie said.

  “That’s just what I need,” I said, climbing to my feet.

  “And don’t forget to wear the hat,” she said.

  “What?”

  “Hey, you’re trying to convince his family to sell you their property,” Josie said. “You don’t want to do anything that might hurt Cooter’s feelings and ruin your chances to close the deal.”

  “Now you’re just screwing with me, right?

  “Maybe,” she deadpanned.

  Sammy poked his head through the door.

  “Your mom and Rooster are here,” he said, then disappeared back into the registration area.

  We said our goodbyes to the Otterhound and left the condo area. On the way to registration, just to be on the safe side, I grabbed the squirrel hat from a closet I’d tossed it in the day Cooter gave it to me. I stuffed it into the pocket of my sweatpants as I entered the registration area and shook my head when I got a look at my mother’s outfit. She was wearing an identical outfit to the one I’d given Chef Claire, but hers was hot pink.

  “At least you won’t have to worry about being mistaken for a deer,” I said, grinning.

  “It’s nice to see you too, darling. Is that what you’re wearing?”

  “Yes.”

  “Where did I go wrong, Rooster?” my mother said with a sigh. “Okay, Paul Bunyan, you win. Are you ready to go?”

  “I am,” I said. “I just need to grab my skis. They’re right outside the back door.”

  “I’ll grab them,” Rooster said, heading for the condo area. “I’ll meet you outside.”

  I waved goodbye to Josie and Jill and followed my mother down the front steps to Rooster’s truck.

  “How much do you think Mrs. Friendly is going to want for the property?” I said, grabbing a handful of snow off the roof of the truck and making a snowball.

  “Now that she knows there’s a reservoir of natural gas under the ground, probably a lot,” my mother said, keeping a close eye on the snowball in my hand. “Don’t you dare.”

  “The thought never crossed my mind,” I said, grinning at her. Then something popped into my head that I’d been wondering about for a while. “Hey, Mom. Whatever happened to your plans to develop the property you own behind the Inn? Your last idea was to turn it into a zoo.”

  “I took a look at it,” she said. “But it would have been a nightmare dealing with all the issues that popped up right from the start. And at my age, who needs a hassle like that?”

  “So, you’re just going to leave it undeveloped?”

  “Actually, darling, I have been thinking about what to do with it,” she said.

  “And?”

  “I thought I’d give it to you and Josie,” she said, taking a step back to give Rooster room to attach my skis to the roof.

  “What on earth would we do with it?” I said, staring out at the woods that ran behind our fenced play area.

  “Expand,” she said with a big grin. “I’m thinking about a multi-county rescue program.”

  “What?” I said.

  “You do such wonderful work,” she said, shrugging. “It seems like a shame not to expand it. In addition to dogs, you could also take care of horses and a host of other animals.”

  “Mom, we’d need to hire a couple more full-time vets and at least another dozen staff to handle something that size.”

  “So?” she said, giving me a blank stare.

  I studied her face closely. She was giving me her best I really don’t see what the problem is look, so I merely nodded.

  “Let me run it by Josie,” I said eventually.

  “That’s my girl,” she said as she opened the door and gestured for me to climb into the back seat.

  Rooster hopped in and started the truck. He glanced over at my mother then at me through the rearview mirror.

  “Are we all set?” he said, putting the truck into gear.

  “I believe we are,” my mother said.

  “Did you bring your hat?” Rooster said with a grin.

  “Yeah, I’ve got it,” I said. “Josie said I had to bring it along just in case Cooter asks about it.”

  “You got a new hat?” my mother said, glancing back at me.

  “Yup.”

  “Well, let me see it,” my mother said, half-turning in her seat.

  “No, that’s okay, Mom,” I said, shaking my head.

  “Don’t be silly,” she said. “Let me see your hat.”

  I pulled the hat from my pocket, punched it back into some semblance of shape and placed it on my head. It covered my forehead and was only kept from going further down my face by the tops of my ears. I cocked my head and struck a pose.

  “Wow,” she said, dumbfounded.

  “Nice, huh?”

  “Well, at least it goes with the rest of your outfit.”

  “Funny,” I said, pushing the hat up off my forehead.

  “Tragic,” she said, unable to take her eyes off the hat. “Simply tragic.”

  Chapter 16

  “Darling, I’ve found that it’s much easier when both skis are actually pointing in the same direction.”

  “Yeah, thanks for the tip, Mom,” I said, lifting one foot to reposition the recalcitrant ski.

  We’d been making the trek from Rooster’s truck to the Friendly’s cabin for about twenty minutes through close to a foot of fresh snow. I was sweating profusely and cursing under my breath. At least, I thought it was under my breath.

  “Watch the language, darling,” my mother said over her shoulder as she continued to expertly work her way through the snow.

  “Are we there yet?” I said as a trickle of cold sweat ran down the middle of my back.

  “You need a break?” Rooster said over his shoulder without breaking stride.

  “I need a doctor.”

  “Hang in there,” Rooster said, laughing. “Only a couple more hours to go.”

  “You’re really not funny, Rooster,” I said, digging my poles into the snow and churning forward.

  We came to a sudden stop when we heard the first gunshot. Then we heard several more in rapid succession.

  “It’s okay,” Rooster said. “It’s not hunters. Cooter is probably doing some target shooting.”

  We resumed our trek and ten minutes later came to the fence that bordered the Friendly’s cabin. I removed my skis, stuck them upright in the snow, then knelt down to massage my burning calves. The gunshots continued, and it sounded like they were coming from the far side of the cabin. We were about a hundred feet from the porch when the front door opened and Very stepped outside waving.

  “What a nice surprise,” she called out. “But you must be freezing. Come on in.”

  I climbed the short set of steps breathing heavily and gave her a quick hug.

  “How are you doing, Very?”

  “I’m good,” she said, beaming. “Hi, Rooster.” Then she looked at my mother. “You’re Suzy’s mom, aren’t you?”

  “I am,” my mother said, extending her hand. “It’s been a long time, Very.”

  “I love your outfit,” Very said, nodding. “Pink’s my favorite color.”

/>   “Thank you.”

  “Let’s go inside,” Very said, holding the door open for us.

  We walked inside, and I was impressed with the way the cabin had been designed and decorated. Skitch Friendly may have been a recluse, but he obviously knew his way around a set of tools. The open space we were standing in dominated the cabin, and it was warm and toasty. I removed my coat and realized my sweater was soaked with sweat. Outside, the sound of gunfire continued.

  “Have a seat,” Very said, heading for the kitchen area. “We have coffee and tea. Or if you like, I’ll pour you some of Mama’s shine.”

  “Maybe just a smidgen,” Rooster said, holding his thumb and forefinger about an inch apart.

  “I suppose I could have one,” my mother said, nodding. “Thanks.”

  “You got it,” Very said. “How about you, Suzy?”

  I frowned as I remembered my previous encounter with Jessie Friendly’s deadly concoction and shook my head.

  “Coffee’s fine, thanks,” I said. “Let me give you a hand.”

  I followed her into the kitchen and watched as Very carefully poured two healthy portions of the clear liquid then grabbed an old-time coffee pot from the top of the wood stove and filled a mug.

  “So, how was the rest of your date?” I said.

  “It was great getting out of the house,” Very said. “And he’s nice enough, I guess.” Then she shrugged. “I just think I can do better.”

  “Good for you,” I said, following her back to where my mother and Rooster were sitting.

  Very passed the drinks around, set a tray of fresh biscuits and honey on the table in front of us, then sat down across from us.

  “Help yourself,” she said. “I just made them.”

  We each grabbed one of the warm biscuits and slathered honey. We ate in silence as Very continued to glance back and forth at us.

  “So, what brings you out here?” she said after we’d devoured our first biscuit.

  “We’d like to talk to your mom,” Rooster said.

  “She’s out back with Cooter,” Very said, getting to her feet. “He just got a new scope for his rifle that he’s having trouble getting sighted.” She walked toward a door on the far side of the cabin then paused and looked back at us. “Multiple visitors on the same day. That’s a first.”

  “You’re expecting someone else?” Rooster said.

  “Yes,” Very said, grinning. “Herman is supposed to drop by later.”

  She headed out the door, and my mother continued to stare at her through the window as Very headed down a flight of stairs.

  “She seems remarkably well adjusted,” my mother said. “And very bright.”

  “She is,” I said, nodding.

  “So, Mr. Billows is on his way,” Rooster said. “Looks like we got here just in time.”

  “Are you really sure we need to buy this place?” I said.

  They both nodded.

  “But there’s a chance that fracking is never going to be allowed again,” I said.

  “You want to explain it?” Rooster said to my mother.

  “No, you go ahead,” she said, reaching for a second biscuit.

  “Your mother and I could never live with ourselves if we didn’t do everything we could to stop it,” he said, then took a sip of shine. “Man, this is really good.”

  “I’ll take your word for it,” I said.

  “And if fracking was ever made legal down the road after we’re gone, everyone would know who dropped the ball.”

  “You’re worried about your legacy?” I said, frowning.

  “No, darling,” my mother said. “We’re worried about a bunch of poison getting into the groundwater and ending up in the River. But, yes, I would much rather be remembered as someone who helped prevent it from happening as opposed to being labeled an enabler.”

  “Fair enough,” I said, shrugging. “But I’m not sure why I need to be part of the deal.”

  “Because one day it’s all going to be yours,” she said. “And you might as well be involved right from the start.”

  The door opened, and Jessie Friendly entered. She slipped her snowy boots off and closed the door behind her then walked across the room with a confused look on her face.

  “Hi, Jessie,” Rooster said, standing up.

  “No, sit,” she said, waving him back onto the couch. “Very said you wanted to talk to me.”

  “We do,” Rooster said.

  “Okay,” she said, sitting down in the chair Very had just vacated. “If you were willing to make that trek all the way in, the least I can do is listen to what you have to say.”

  “Very mentioned that Herman Billows is stopping by later,” Rooster said.

  “So, that’s what this is all about?” she said, frowning as she glanced back and forth at us. “Now that you’ve found something buried on my property you want, I guess I’ll never be lonely, huh?”

  “No, it’s not like that, Jessie,” Rooster said, shaking his head.

  “He’s offering me a lot of money for those lease rights,” she said. “And a whole lot more if the government ever changes its mind and lets them start drilling.”

  “Has Very been talking with you about moving?” I said. “To someplace warmer?”

  “That’s all we’ve been talking about. And we’re thinking seriously about doing it,” Jessie said. “I’m not sure how I’ll handle being back in civilization, but I’m sure looking forward to giving it a shot.”

  “What about Cooter?” Rooster said.

  “Cooter will never leave this place,” Jessie said, shaking her head. Then she grinned. “I’m sure gonna miss that boy.”

  We all laughed along with her, then she turned serious again.

  “So, why are you here? You thinking about maybe beating Mr. Willows’ offer?”

  “Actually, Jessie,” Rooster said. “We’re thinking about buying your property.”

  “Buying it?” she said, frowning. “Why would you want to do that?”

  “So we can keep people like Mr. Billows from ever getting their hands on it,” my mother said.

  “You really think this fracking stuff is that bad?” Jessie said.

  “Let’s just say that we aren’t willing to take that chance,” she said. “If it comes down to a choice between a well-lit room or clean drinking water, I’ll sit in the dark any day.”

  “What would you do with the place?” Jessie said.

  “Not a thing,” my mother said. “In fact, Cooter would be welcome to live here for as long as he wants.”

  “But he’d have to pay you rent, right?”

  “No,” my mother said, shaking her head. “He can continue to live here for free.”

  “How much of my shine have you people been drinking?” she said, obviously concerned that we were up to something nefarious.

  “If you’re willing to sell us your property, Jessie, we would own virtually all of the acreage where they’ve found that gas reserve.”

  “And you’d just sit on the land?”

  “Yes, we would,” Rooster said. “Eventually, all of it will pass to Suzy. And she’s made the same commitment to leave it untouched.”

  “I probably shouldn’t tell you this,” Jessie said. “But I don’t have a clue what it’s worth.”

  “We don’t either, Jessie,” my mother said. “But we have a general idea. What we’re proposing is that we get a couple of appraisers out here to take a look. Based on what they come up with, I’m sure we’ll be able to give you more than a fair price for it.”

  “And you’d be willing to put the part about Cooter being able to live here in the contract?” she said, staring at my mother.

  “You can put anything you want in the contract,” my mother said, shrugging. “Except for allowing any deep drilling.”

  “Mr. Billows is coming out here with a contract today,” Jessie said. “What do I tell him?”

  “Tell him no,” Rooster said. “Or better yet, tell him you’re selling the
property, and the new owners aren’t interested in leasing the land.”

  “He’s not going to like that,” Jessie said.

  “I’m sure he’ll get over it,” Rooster said.

  “Things sure have changed in a week,” Jessie said, staring out the window. “First, Skitch. Now, this.” Then she focused on my mother. “So, how would this work?”

  My mother reached into her backpack and pulled out an envelope. She handed it to Jessie who opened it and removed a single sheet of paper.

  “That’s a letter indicating your intent to sell us your property. It’s good for thirty days, and if we aren’t able to come to an agreement by then, it becomes invalid. Over the next few days, we’ll get the appraisals done then make you an offer. And as soon as we agree on a price, we’ll write you a check.”

  “Just like that?” Jessie said, perusing the letter.

  “Just like that,” Rooster said.

  My mother again reached into her backpack and removed her checkbook. She wrote the check, signed it, then handed it to Jessie.

  “And just so you’re convinced that we’re serious, we’d like to give this to you as a down payment.”

  Jessie stared at the check, then stared at my mother.

  “This is just the down payment?” she said.

  “It is,” my mother said. “And I’m sure the next check we give you will be much bigger.”

  Jessie stared down at the check again and blinked several times.

  “What do you think?” Rooster said.

  “I think it’s time for Very and I to start looking at condos.”

  The door opened, and Very and Cooter entered after stomping snow off their boots. Cooter was holding a large piece of paper with a bullseye, and he beamed when he spotted me.

  “Hi, Suzy,” he said. “Where’s your hat?”

  “It’s right here, Cooter,” I said, removing it from my pocket and waving it in the air. “I always take my hat off inside.”

  “So, you like it?”

  “Love it,” I said.

  “That’s great,” Cooter said, then focused on his mother. “Mama, that sight still ain’t working right. Take a look.”

  He held up the target and pointed at it.

  “My first shot is always dead on, then they start drifting up and to the left. See?”