It wasn’t long until she got one. “Okay…okay, I hope I can help.”
Chapter 20
“TGIF, goddammit.” Alvin practically threw himself into his seat.
Rebecca swiveled her chair to look at him. “Why are you thankin’ God when it’s your weekend to work?”
Alvin glared at her, but then he smirked. “You just had to shit on my parade, huh?”
She winked. “That’s what I’m here for.”
“I actually don’t mind working weekends,” Emmet said.
Rebecca glanced at him. “Well, good, you can take mine next time I’m up, and I can go eat steak at Mark’s.”
“Damn right you can.” Mark chuckled. “Good steak too. Like being at Ruth’s Chris Steakhouse.”
“Is that right? Next time I want asparagus with hollandaise, and it better be kick ass.” Rebecca leaned back in her chair and smiled.
Mark waved her comment away. “I’m sure Sheila has a recipe.”
“Uh-huh, all right, Ruthy.”
He grinned at her. “Since I got your attention, can I talk to you for a minute in the back?”
Curious. “Yeah, I guess.” Rebecca stood.
“If I walk back there and y’all are makin’ out, I quit.” Alvin’s lips were pursed, and his nose was crinkled in disgust.
“Let’s do it now, then.” Mark grabbed at Rebecca, but she laughed and swatted him away.
“I would, but I like your wife,” Rebecca said. “Plus, I’m sure it wouldn’t bother him since he lives off making people deliberately uncomfortable.”
“I am damn good at that.” Alvin smiled proudly.
Rebecca rolled her eyes as she followed Mark to the back toward the interrogation rooms. She stopped in the hallway and leaned against the wall. “What’s up?”
Mark shrugged. “Just checking in with you.”
She tilted her head as she looked at him. “Why?”
“Dorset case. You weren’t able to sleep at first.”
“Oh yeah, I’ve never been front and center like that. I coulda tanked the whole thing. I know she’s gonna do some time, but her douchey ex will too. Maybe her lawyer can plead it out somehow.”
“But you didn’t. I didn’t know you were worried about all that. You sure you’re okay?”
Rebecca nodded. “Yeah, I’m sleepin’ good now. I even hung out and had a little fun with Rick. Dani was there too. How about you?” She looked at him closely.
“It affected me more than I thought it would. Brought back some bad memories of when me and Sheila were talking about divorce. I remember being scared out of my mind of losing her and Millie too, especially since I’m a cop. I talked to Sheila about it. That helped. She actually told me to leave you alone about the whole thing and let you come to me. You know…because you’re a woman and it would be offensive.”
She stared at him. “I don’t work like that.”
Mark threw up his hands. “I know, that’s what I told her. Anyway, things with your ex still awkward?”
“It’s only been two days since I last saw her. You should at least give me four to work my magic.”
He laughed.
Rebecca smiled. “At least we’re talkin’ on the phone…kinda. One minute it’s like pullin’ teeth and the next it’s not. I just listen even when there’s dead air.”
“Well, that’s better than nothing.”
She shook her head. “I don’t know. I feel like she needs more than that. This is important to her, and I don’t want to do anythin’ to screw that up.” This went past her trying to make an impression or bringing them closer.
“I’m not sure what you’re saying, but tell her that. I think she’d appreciate it. Anybody would.”
“Yeah, maybe.” Rebecca met his gaze.
“Should we kiss now in case Alvin’s watching?” Mark stepped away from the wall.
Rebecca slapped him on the shoulder. “You’re so not my type.”
As Dani stepped off the elevator, she muttered to herself to stay the course. She had to do this. Moreso, she needed to do this not just for Rick, but because Sandra deserved better. So, here she was, walking down the hall of the third floor, instead of getting a snack in the cafeteria. She may not be able to make amends with everyone she’d offended, but Sandra was an important start.
Dani was hesitant and a little fearful because the situation was completely out of her control. She’d been up half the night trying to figure out what to say. Becca had been on the phone with her for some of it. She listened and encouraged, which only helped minutely. Dani was frustrated then, and she was frustrated now. She still had no idea how to really approach this situation. She slowed her gait and tried her best to literally shake out the tension. Dani whispered to herself again before stopping in front of the nurses station.
Sandra talked and laughed with a fellow nurse. She laughed a lot. Dani envied that, and—hindsight being what it was—maybe that’s why she was intimate with her, to be close to a light like that. “Can I help you with something?”
Dani glanced at the nurse standing front and center. She was so focused on the matter at hand, she hadn’t even noticed her. “Um, yes. I just need to speak to Sandra for a few minutes.”
At the sound of her name, Sandra looked up. Other nurses glanced Dani’s way as well. Sandra stared at her. The laughter was gone, replaced by a wrinkled brow. Slowly, she moved forward and around the desk until she was in front of Dani. There were a million eyes on them, making her skin burn. “Can we go somewhere more private?”
“If I say the on-call room, will you give me a second to appreciate the irony?” Sandra’s question was soaked in sarcasm, but her expression was unreadable.
Dani was confused for a moment, and then it came to her. Sandra had once offered to drag her into an on-call room for a repeat performance. Blood rushed to her face. “Okay, if it helps, but I’d rather the lounge.” Dani headed back down the hall.
She reached for the door, only to have it open as two people filed out. They nodded and smiled. Dani returned the gesture. Too antsy to sit down, she stood in the middle of the room.
Sandra entered, crossed her arms over her chest, and raised her eyebrows as she looked at Dani.
Dani cleared her throat. “I’ve already apologized…” No, no that wasn’t right. She sounded like she was on the defensive. “I mean, it’s come to my attention…”
Her voice trailed off again. She hadn’t been forced to do this: Dani wanted to. This whole thing was personal, and she needed to treat it as such. “I’m sorry for insulting your sexuality. It’s no excuse, but I was in an awful place. I lashed out at you, and you didn’t deserve any of it. Even though I never thought of you as a friend, you were a part of a group of nurses I’d decided to try to be friendly with to make things easier for me as a doctor at the hospital. I don’t usually go around sleeping with people I work with, but I enjoyed the attention you gave me. No one deserves to be treated that way. I never thought about your feelings in all this. I’m sorry for that too.” She did her best to look Sandra in the eyes.
“Rick put you up to this, didn’t he?” Sandra huffed.
“No, he didn’t.”
Sandra studied her. “It didn’t take me that long to figure out you were fake.”
That stung. Dani braced herself and swallowed down the response waiting on the tip of her tongue.
“But I can tell that wasn’t a fake apology.”
“It wasn’t.”
“I don’t know you, Dani, and you don’t know me. Rick is your best friend, so if I want things to work with him…” Sandra dropped her arms to her side. “But don’t expect us to be all cookies and cream by tomorrow.”
Dani nodded. She didn’t expect them to become fast friends. Cordiality was the best she could hope for.
“I’m gonna get back to wo
rk now.” Sandra had already turned her back on Dani.
“Okay.”
When she was alone, Dani sat down. That was harder than she’d thought it would be, but she had done it without crumbling. It was an accomplishment either way.
Rebecca got in her car and pulled on the seat belt, but instead of putting the key in the ignition, she whipped out her phone. For some reason, tonight she needed to know her destination beforehand. Rebecca dialed Dani’s number.
“Hello?” Slightly out of breath, she answered on the third ring.
“Were you busy?” Rebecca started preparing herself to be shot down.
“No, I’m home. I was getting out of the shower when I heard my phone ringing.”
“Oh.” Rebecca blanked for a minute, wondering about Dani’s curves with four more years of maturity attached. From what she’d seen so far, she’d really grown into them.
“Hello?”
“Sorry, got distracted. Is it okay that I come over? There’s somethin’ I wanna talk to you about.”
Dani went silent.
Rebecca took the phone away from her ear to make sure they were still connected.
“We’re talking right now.”
“I know but I think it’ll have a bigger impact…the right impact if we’re face to face.”
“Becca…”
“It’s important, and, if it helps, it has nothin’ to do with us.”
“There is no us,” Dani shot back quickly—too quickly.
“If you say so. Is that a yes?” Rebecca stared out the windshield. She waved back at Mark as he got into his SUV.
“You can’t stay long. I have an early morning.”
“I won’t—I just got off work myself, so no partyin’ for me tonight.”
“Okay, then.” Dani sounded overall unaffected.
“Okay, see you soon.”
Dani hung up. Rebecca sighed and started her car. There’d been a thaw between them, but it was only a few inches deep. More than anything, she wanted to get to the molten core.
Twenty minutes later, Rebecca stood outside Dani and Rick’s apartment door. She didn’t see Rick’s car. They would be alone. Rebecca was filled with anticipation and dread simultaneously. She wanted to be near her, but at times Dani, especially this Dani, could be unpredictable. Rebecca reminded herself she was playing the long game, and in the end the payout could be huge.
She knocked. Seconds later, Dani opened it and stepped out of the doorway, giving her a wide berth. Rebecca smiled anyway. She was sure that the pull between them was partly responsible for the way Dani shied away from contact. No way she was the only one who felt something so electric. As Rebecca walked past her, she caught Dani’s eyes, and the flare of heat between them made her feel like she was sweating on the inside.
Dani held her gaze for a few seconds before looking away, but not before her eyes darkened.
Rebecca’s stomach clenched, but she wasn’t here for that. Still, she loved that feeling, and right now, it was palpable enough to reach out and touch. She headed for the couch but paused when she spied the bottle of Coke and a glass of ice on the coffee table. The gesture actually made Rebecca’s heart speed up. “Oh, thanks.”
Dani rolled her eyes. “It’s not a kidney or anything.”
“Might as well be.” Rebecca laughed and sat down. She wasn’t surprised when Dani sat at the other end. She opened and poured some Coke into the glass. Unable to wait, she drank at least half of it.
“It really must be serious.”
“What? Why?” Rebecca asked.
Dani gestured toward the glass in Rebecca’s hand. “You almost drank it all.”
Was it wrong that her knowing that warmed her inside? “Yeah, it is. I just don’t want you to take it the wrong way. I’ve been givin’ it some thought.”
“Okay, so what is it?”
“I don’t wanna be the one who keeps you down.”
Dani’s forehead wrinkled. “What do you mean?”
“What you’re goin’ through. It’s serious, and I don’t wanna tell you the wrong thing. I want you to get where you’re tryin’ to go.”
Her eyes widened in supposed understanding. Dani jumped up. “If you didn’t want to help—”
Rebecca got up too. She reached out snagging Dani by the arm. God, the spark started at her fingertips, and within seconds Rebecca’s whole arm was tingling.
Dani looked down at her hand. She didn’t try to pull away. Her lips parted as they stared at each other.
The living room got hotter, smaller, and tighter. How long until things exploded between them again, no matter how much Dani tried to deny that there was a fire at all? Rebecca had patience, but it wasn’t biblical. She mentally switched gears again, which was hard as hell. Rebecca stepped toward Dani. “Hear me out.”
Dani licked her lips and nodded. Reluctantly, Rebecca let her go. They sat back down closer than they were before, within arm’s length. “I’m not sayin’ I don’t wanna help. I do, and I wanna do it right. Maybe if I had kept at it, I would’ve found the right therapist and dealt with things sooner. You work at a hospital. I think you should take advantage of that. You can consider me back-up or a cheerleader if that’s what you need.”
She stared at Rebecca like she had three heads. Dani’s mouth fell open, and she flushed red. “Do you…” She sucked in a breath. “So you think I’m that messed up that I need a therapist?”
Rebecca wasn’t going to sugarcoat this, and she wasn’t going to let Dani make her the bad guy. “It has nothin’ to do with bein’ messed up. I think it’s more about feelin’ overwhelmed and needin’ somebody to help break things down. Do you feel that way?” She put the decision squarely in Dani’s lap.
Dani looked away and swallowed loud enough for Rebecca to hear. When she met Rebecca’s gaze again, Dani’s eyes were glassy and soft. “Yes.”
“Then just think about it.” Dani’s hand was only a few inches from hers, and Rebecca wanted so much to touch her again. She didn’t fight it. As she curled her fingers around Dani’s hand, Rebecca expected her to jerk away, but to her surprise, Dani gasped and squeezed. When Dani pulled away several seconds later, Rebecca felt like she’d run a marathon and won.
Chapter 21
Dani studied Jacob’s most recent MRI. “I was hoping to see something different.”
“I’m sure we all were. It would have been a miracle if chemo had yielded the results she wanted.” Dr. Meda looked around the room. Everyone nodded.
Her gaze fell back to her iPad. “I should probably do the talking to Sheri.” Dani quickly glanced up at Dr. Meda. She wasn’t trying to offend or take over as head of the team.
He nodded and smiled. “I agree. I’ll provide any additional support that’s needed, especially if Sheri has more in-depth questions.”
Dani glanced back down at her iPad. She felt jittery. Her heart raced, and it was difficult to keep still, as if someone had injected her with adrenaline. She recognized her anxiety for what it was. Had she crossed a boundary with this family? That explanation didn’t seem plausible. Dani cared, just like she always did, that this case was more than likely going to have a positive outcome. There was no need to obsess.
Dani’s screen blurred as another surge of worry grabbed hold of her. Maybe the screwed-up part of her life was starting to seep through. Patients needed her compassion, her confidence, and, when necessary, some aspect of vulnerability. She didn’t want to build a wall shutting them out as well because of her fear of getting hurt.
There was a knock at the conference room door. Dr. Meda got up and escorted Sheri inside. “Good afternoon.” Sheri greeted the room, but she caught Dani’s gaze and smiled.
As best she could, Dani smiled back and waved her over to the empty seat beside her. Once Sheri was seated, Dani put the iPad on the table between them.
> “What you’re looking at…what we’re all looking at is a collection of scans showing how Jacob’s tumor has responded to chemotherapy.” With a stylus, Dani pointed at and enlarged the section of the image that showed the tumor. “This is before treatment began.”
Sheri exhaled noisily.
Dani went through each image slowly.
“It shrank.” Sheri clapped her hands together and smiled.
“It did, just as we discussed,” Dani agreed. Someone cleared their throat. Others shifted in their seats. The sound seemed almost cacophonous. “The last two images are what I want you to see.” Dani did the same thing she’d done before: enlarge and point.
“But…but it’s still there.” Sheri’s voice shook.
“Yes, but it did shrink.”
“No…no, no, no. This can’t be right.” Sheri shook her head. Her chest heaved.
“I’m sorry, but it is.” Dani kept her voice soft.
Sheri’s eyes were wide. Her lips pursed. She looked both angry and horrified.
“He has to have surgery to remove the remainder of the tumor. His treatment plan has never changed.” Dani held Sheri’s gaze.
“Can’t he just have radiation or whatever?” Sheri asked.
Dani expected that question. She glanced at Dr. Meda.
“No, radiation at this point will do more harm to his body than good,” Dr. Meda said. “As discussed throughout his treatment here, the only plausible course of action is surgery followed by an additional cycle of chemotherapy to reduce recidivism. His prognosis is very good, Sheri. I promise you.”
Sheri’s breathing was loud, raspy. She stared at Dr. Meda, and Dani wondered whether she was really seeing him. Going with her instincts, Dani touched Sheri’s arm. It felt as if her skin was vibrating, but she didn’t pull away. “I know you’re worried, but this hospital has a high surgical success rate.”
“That doesn’t matter. There’s always a chance that something could go…wrong.” Sheri’s voice was husky, thick.
“That’s true too, but what’s the alternative?” Dani wasn’t going to lie to her. “I know this is hard, but you’ll make the right decision.”
Drawing the Line Page 21
