by C. G Miller
When you rip it away, all that’s left is an emptiness. It’s searching in all the hard places wanting to grab that ball to fill you once again. It’s a once in a lifetime feeling with a once in a lifetime person. My person was Cree. Is Cree. But, he couldn’t resist.
I would have let it all go. All the unknown if he would have just told me the truth. Sometimes you have to walk away. Which was the worst feeling in my life. Worse than my cracked-out parents. Worse than being stuck in a Podunk town. Worse than working myself to the bone.
Even in another life, if it were different circumstances, I wouldn’t have minded the worse, if he was a part of it.
What do you do when you kick yourself to the curb? I go back to who I was. I imagine other people with their stories I give them. I forget my fantasy. I put Cree in the back of my mind. I walk a chilly walk to the gas station to grab a six pack.
I see a couple hand in hand. Just tourists passing through, he kisses her cheek, but his eyes are dull. Hers have a sparkle. He probably is fucking his intern, while she keeps house, makes social dates keeping them a busy couple all the while he secretly hates it. But, he stays because he will never do better than the beauty on his arm now.
That’s the negativity outlook I had lost while stuck in a fantasy. No matter how positive a person can be, the negativity creeps in. Negativity has a bad rap just because it has more truth to it than the positive outlook. It’s a fine line. A line I straddle.
But, the line is so fine I found myself secretly hoping on a positive side that Cree would come. He would have chased me, brought me back to him where I belong. That’s the hard part for positivity. There is so much doubt wanting to be positive. Wanting him to fight for me. To chase me. To heal me. To rescue me. That small bit keeps me going. For how long though?
My hope ran out after a few weeks. Cree wouldn’t come. He didn’t have time for this waiting game. He was stuck on a stage which is where he would always be. I stuck on my own, playing a part that would never be me until I actually saved enough to leave.
In that time, I realized what I wanted. I wanted to be like Cree. I wanted to help those less fortunate. I took what little savings I had left and applied to college to begin taking some nursing classes. There were people out there like Cree had said less fortunate. I wanted to help. I want to make a difference. No matter how bad this world could be, how bad my negativity creeped in, didn’t mean I couldn’t help those in need.
By the time I knew it, my first semester had ended. I was running myself ragged keeping busy with work and school. But, there was a goal and success at the end. A few more months in this town, one more semester, and then I would finish out my schooling at UNR. I went down to the bank, took out a personal loan and realized I could achieve so much with just a small interest. I was doing it.
I didn’t need a man to sweep me off my feet. I didn’t need to be rescued from this town or life. I was rescuing myself.
I sat in my apartment above the bar staring at my computer. I felt lazy not having to do any assignments. The apartment was still while I sat there in silence wondering what to do with myself. It had been so long where I had an actual moment to think.
My thoughts took me right back to Cree. There was no escaping him. Not even keeping my thoughts busy could I escape Cree.
I could hear the music blaring from the bar below me. It was morning, in the middle of the week, spiking my curiosity, I went downstairs to see what was going on.
The bar was completely empty. Not even Tilly was in sight. I proceeded to the jukebox to see what the loud beautiful song was. It was by Vera Blue, an artist I had never heard of, but the song captivated me.
I was still as I sat there listening to the melody when a chill ran up my arms. It wasn’t a bad chill. It was a quivering, maybe you’re being watched kind of chill.
Cautiously turning, Cree stood at the end of the bar in an all-black suit. My heart skipped several beats seeing him here. He brought his hand to his pocket pulling out something that he placed on the bar.
Cree casually walked behind the bar and grabbed two glasses. One tall, filled with bubbling champagne, the other short, he placed a ball of ice in then dribbling a brown liquid over it.
Walking towards him, I pointed, “I’ll have what you’re having.”
He nodded at me and repeated with another short glass. Sliding it towards me, I took a seat on the stool, leaning over to see what he placed on the bar.
A keychain with a silver X linked to an outlined gold emblem. The inside turquoise with a cage and a bird. Then a tag that read Little One The X-Perience.
All this time, I was waiting for him. I had been waiting to fill the void with that once in a lifetime ball of feelings that rushed back to me the moment I saw him. All I ever wanted was him. Here he was and yet I still felt there was unfinished business.
Grabbing the keychain, it felt cold in my hand. But, it felt like an accomplishment. I wasn’t sure why but seeing the mark and then my tattoo it was like my world existed in its entirety and there were no more games.
“This is for you. We are second owners to The X-Perience. This is your key to do with what you want.”
“Are you going to tell me now what you weren’t willing to tell me before I left?” I asked fisting the emblem in my hand.
“After you left the first time. I was struggling with what I was feeling for you. I was battling the rules I had set forth for myself. I had to beat you out of my system. I don’t want to go into details, but Eve had damming pictures I really didn’t want you to see.”
“So, you’d rather go fuck some other bimbo over something you did when we weren’t even anything.”
“Kyle,” Cree let out a breath, his stupidity irritating me, “I didn’t fuck some bimbo. I just beat Eve at her own game.”
“I haven’t seen you in months.” I implied he was lying, but he had never given me reason to think he was a liar. The fact though he didn’t chase after me, made me wonder, is he being honest?
“I’ve been building my case for hostile delegation. When I watched you leave, I never felt more broken. You are the only person in this world I need and want. I didn’t want to give Eve the satisfaction for ruining us and keeping me. As much as I wanted to come after you, I knew there could be no more games. Everything had to be put to bed. I didn’t want to put you through even more of the sadistic side of The X-Perience.”
I grabbed Cree’s hand from across the bar. The mere touch of our skin sent electric currents through me. My mind was made up, I loved him, and the rest didn’t matter. He continued,
“So, I have been flooding Eve with paperwork. Eve thought she could ruin my happily ever after with photographs. But, she forgot one thing. Her story. I know the true Eve. I know where she came from, how she got started, and if there is anything more precious to a scorned woman it’s keeping her reputation in tack.”
“We’re free?”
“We’re free Little One. Will you keep me?”
My grin was wide knowing there was no other answer but yes.
Jumping over the bar, I jumped into Cree’s arms and let him wrap his arms around me to start our forever.
Epilogue
Cree
The announcer called name after name as I patiently waited for Kyle’s name. I stood towards the back with a bouquet of white lilies in hand. When the man finally called her name, I screamed with congratulations as he handed her, her Bachelor of Science in nursing diploma.
Our eyes locked. She waved the diploma above her head. My Little One had finally done it.
Bringing her back to my place was bittersweet after I went after her.
She was able to transfer her credits to UNLV and finish out college. The joy I felt in my heart and how proud I was of her for accomplishing her dream of wanting to help others less fortunate was beyond anything I had ever done.
Kyle was a gem doing everything the right way. It made me love her even more.
Treating Kyle was something I
did every day. And she me. Kyle is the best thing that ever happened to me. But, tonight was big and nothing but the best for her.
I took her to a fine dining restaurant where we ate a nice dinner. The song I played in the bar played overhead in the entire restaurant. I watched her eyes glow knowing she called it our song, but me never giving in. It was a small gesture that meant something to her. I would feed that every day.
The time came when the waiter brought dessert. Strawberry sparkling wine with white chocolate covered strawberries topped with a red syrup.
Kyle did a little dance as she wrapped her lips around the strawberries.
It made me smile. And I knew this was it. This was everything I had been waiting for. A minute before the song ended, I stood with determination and in front of her bent down on one knee.
Bringing out the box, holding it in front of her, her hands covered her mouth in shock and on a shaky adrenaline rush I asked, “Walker Kyle Thackery, you have completely changed my life for the better. You once said you were marked for me. The truth is I am marked for you. Will you do me the honor of becoming my wife?”
Kyle let out a screech, jumping from her chair, she took the ring repeating yes until she fell into my arms.
“We can start forever?” She whispered.
“Forever. Where are we going?” I smiled as I kissed her neck.
“We will know when we get there. You can be my monster, and with my degree, I can be theirs.”
We ended the night tousled in the sheets. Bringing her to the edge, I brought my hand to her neck. With a slight squeeze, I whispered in her ear, “Little One this is forever. I fucking love you. Scream for me.”
The End.
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The X-Perience Series
Book 2
Love Games
Blurb
Stories tell of princesses and princes falling in love, living happily ever after in their big castle for the rest of their lives.
But, what happens when a wealthy princess falls in love with a wolf in prince clothing?
This story doesn’t end happily ever after. Matter of fact, the macabre of it all will have you wondering why love always leads to pain and death.
Prologue
I fucking hate weddings. They are of utmost disgust to me. I tend to avoid attending any weddings but, if I didn’t show my face at this one, Cree would have a coronary. After all, he is second in command all because I made the mistake of confiding in him. We were both in a sense lost when we bumped into each other years ago. Two strangers telling their stories seemed okay at the time. Never did I realize it would bite me in the ass later.
I waved a server to me and grabbed a glass of champagne from his plate. Downing the whole thing I held my finger up to him to wait. I set the empty down and proceeded to take the last two on his tray.
The venue was vast, most of the people here were my investors. From what I understood Kyle had no family. But, Cree was adamant that she had the biggest most expensive wedding thus sending out invites to anyone he knew.
This was just Cree letting his ego grow as he flaunted Kyle around introducing her to all my hard-earned investors. Cree was shoving it to me. I didn’t blame him. I did try to steal his happy ever after but, love is death and better played as a game.
Everyone was in awe at the white lilies placed all throughout the venue. They all mingled tirelessly while getting drunk on bourbon and champagne. So, I did the same.
“Well, don’t you look bored.” Cree said from behind me. I turned to see him standing hand in hand with Kyle. She glowered at me with a devilish grin mocking me that they had won.
“I don’t think we have ever properly met. I’m Eve.” I put on a fake smile holding my hand out to greet her. If she didn’t take it I might just kill her myself. If she did, I still might just kill her.
Kyle watched my hand growing tired as it hung there waiting for her to take it. She needed to take it. To show we were on level ground. No one likes when the family fights in a business. We both had to come to terms with the fact she was a new owner, I the old with all the standing.
She shrugged her shoulders, “Germaphobe.” She kept her hand in Cree’s.
“Cree.” I warned. I was done playing his game. He shook my hand and nodded, “Thanks for coming.”
I couldn’t wait until they were on their flight out of here. Kyle had gotten some medical degree and Cree was going to piggyback off that starting another X-Perience.
They would be out of my hair and I could continue with my business and he could have his sister company in wherever the hell they actually landed.
Leaving them to skip the chit chat I walked over to the bar. It was manned by one woman. Her hair was dark with a red bandana tied around her head coming up to bow on the top.
No other bartenders were in sight and I wondered how she was keeping up alone.
“What can I get you?” Her fiery tone was of dominance holding her own.
“You the only bartender?”
“Yep now c’mon I don’t have all day.”
“How do you do it? Keep up with all these people and their drinks.”
She smirked at me, “You really want to know?”
“Yeah, maybe you should come to work at my parties. Eve.” I put my hand out again and she smiled, “Ahh, you’re Eve. Tilly.” She nodded, not taking my hand, “Are you a germ a phobia too?”
Tilly snickered, “No, busy.”
“I’ll have a dry martini, and your secret to keeping up.”
She chomped on some gum as she filled the glass, “My secret is, beer is easy. Most people want a bottle. But, with the hard stuff, you make them stiff drinks in the beginning and then they get watered down drinks. Premade just top with ice. They don’t know the difference.”
“You’re kidding?” I laugh. She just shrugs her shoulders leaving me with a wink as she walks away tending others.
Introduction
The grass isn’t always greener on the other side. Would you rather sit on green grass with a frown, or sit on the dying grass with a smile? That’s what it had come to. That was the life decision on the end of my question. You see, there comes a time in a persons’ life when something clicks. It is different for everyone, but mine came at the age of twenty-five. Not sure what it was or why it happened but, it happened and that is when I knew what I wanted out of life. The life I was living now wasn’t it.
Chapter One Before
The Chosen Path
Growing up on fairytales, I’d told myself I was a princess destined to be a queen. I would find prince charming, fall in love, and live high up in our castle as we ruled over our kingdom.
When I turned eighteen last month, that’s when I became determined to finally have my kingdom. I was ready to fall in love. I was ready to put my child away. But, the child in me always wanted to come out and play.
My mother and father had hoped I would go to college. They thought letting me take a year off to find myself was enough give from them that, I would eventually decide to go. There was only a month left, the college essays still sat on my desk. I had yet to fill out any financial paperwork, and I didn’t even apply to any colleges. I was lost. I was lost because I had no love.
Sure, my parents loved me. They loved me so much that I never had to take advantage of that love. But I was taking advantage now as I swiped the papers into my trash bucket next to my desk.
I was always open with my parents and in return, they were always open with me. I never gave them reason to worry. My parents gave me more freewill because I never lied. I have never hurt their trust.
It was after five, dad would be coming home soon from the office. Mom was downstairs making her famous lasagna. The aroma filled the house making my mouth water.
The dinner table w
as quiet as we ate. Mom and dad kept looking to one another debating who was going to ask the obvious question.
When and where was I going?
My mom’s bright pink lips opened as she brought the fork to her mouth starring at my dad. My fathers’ steel grey eyes never left his plate. He wanted her to be the one to ask. Of course, he would step in if I got mouthy which had only happened a few times in my preteen hormonal years.
I didn’t like to fight with them. I only ever wanted to please them but, I was eighteen now. It was time for them to let me figure it out on my own.
My mother cleared her throat rather loudly bringing my attention to her. Her soft hand tucked her long straight blonde hair behind her ear as one of her pristine bright red acrylic nails caught on her ear. My eyes went to my dad as he watched her.
I loved how much he loved her. The never fought. Insightful disagreements but they always found a middle ground.
My father was nowhere near as beautiful as my mother who reminded me of one of those wives married to millionaires without all the plastic surgery. She was like porcelain, never aging.
My father on the other hand was a bit of a nerd. His black rim glasses hid his eyes, he was tall with some thickness in the middle because all he did was work making sure my mom had the luxury to be able to have anything she wanted. Remembering looking at old photos, they were both beautiful once. Ageing hit my dad a little harder than her and his dark somewhat blonde hair was starting to grey.
“Eve?” My mother spoke.
“Mm.” I looked at her with curiosity stuffing a big bite of lasagna in my mouth.
“Chew with your mouth closed.” She said as her face twisted at the sight of my over full mouth.
