Impractical Magic

by M. J. O'Shea

  Fen nearly choked on his damn fajita. “So, um, you just got a job in the fire department here?” He did look young. Please let him not be just out of high school or something….

  “Not exactly. Like I said, I’m just filling in for the summer. My company could spare me and I figured it would be nice to get out of the city for a while.”

  “City?”

  “San Diego.” Kevin looked around. “It’s so quiet here. I kind of love it. Just hard to get used to.”

  “How, uh, long have you been a firefighter?” So he was fishing for information. Sue him. Better to know early than end up feeling like a pedophile in a few hours.

  Kevin laughed. “Are you trying to figure out how old I am?”

  “Maybe.”

  “I’m twenty-three. I’ve been doing this since I graduated from high school, which was a while ago.” He chuckled some more. “Started classes and training that first summer.”

  Twenty-three. That was honestly better than he’d thought it would be, but still. Fen had never dated anyone more than a year younger than him. Not that they were dating. Or even more than people who’d just met. Quit it….

  “What are you, twenty-four, twenty-five?”

  “Twenty-nine.”

  Kevin shrugged. “Sometimes it’s hard to tell. Anyway, twenty-nine on some people is the same as fifteen on others.”

  Fen laughed. “You calling me immature?”

  “Not in a bad way.” Kevin flashed him another devastating grin.

  THEY TALKED as they ate, sharing little things about Kevin’s job at the fire station and a few more stories about Ben and the boys. Kevin laughed and leaned closer, and their fingers brushed together in the bowl of chips. Fen felt like he was existing in some cutesy little moment that happened to other people. Not him. Never him. The earlier quiet was gone, but none of the awkwardness. Half the time he said something or tried to make a joke, it was flat-out cringeworthy. He supposed Kevin didn’t mind, since he kept giving Fen that shy, sweet smile and looking down at the table. Fen was pretty much hooked.

  “YOU TALK about this best friend a lot. Ben. Is there something else there?”

  Fen tried not to congratulate himself internally while at the same time doing about a thousand backflips in his head. He’s interested. He has to be. Nobody would ask that question if they weren’t interested.

  “Nah.” He tried to grin casually. “It’s never been like that with us. Besides, my other very hot friend who has a serious thing for him would probably have an issue with that. What about you? Girlfriend waiting for you back in San Diego?” Fen was pretty sure but he still had to ask.

  “There’s never been a girl,” Kevin said with a knowing smile. “But there’s not a guy right now either. I’m all alone.” He fake-pouted for a second. It was the cutest thing in the world. Fen puked internally at how much he fell for it.

  “Yeah, me neither. Not anyone waiting at home.” Fen blushed. “Obviously.”

  “Yeah, I kind of figured since I am in your place and nobody’s here but us.” Kevin winked at him.

  Fen laughed and moaned and wanted to replace his brain with one that actually worked the right way. “I’m usually not this awkward, I swear.”

  “It’s kind of adorable. I don’t mind.”

  Okay, he was flirting. Fen hadn’t imagined the way he leaned closer across the table to listen, the way his fingers had seemed to brush deliberately over Fen’s. He was flirting. No doubt about it. And Fen, well, he was happy to flirt back. He rubbed his finger over Kevin’s knuckle accidentally on purpose when he steadied his water glass for a refill, smiled and leaned a bit closer than necessary when he reached out to take Kevin’s plate when dinner was over.

  KEVIN STAYED for another beer, but then it was time for him to go home. He had to be at the firehouse at seven. Fen didn’t envy him. He walked Kevin to the door, half desperately hoping for a kiss, half trying to decide whether he even wanted one or was ready to take that step. Being attracted to a guy and wanting to kiss him wasn’t the same as being ready to do it. Fen wondered if he’d ever gain some equilibrium with this kid.

  He didn’t get a kiss. At least not on the mouth. Kevin simply cupped one of his big warm hands on Fen’s shoulder and brushed his lips across Fen’s cheek.

  “It was really nice of you to do this. I didn’t realize how weird it would feel not to know anyone. It’s nice to have a… friend.”

  Friend. Right. Fen went for a low-key smile. Tried to pretend like he didn’t want to grin and laugh and throw up his dinner all at the same time. “You can come any time. I make dinner nearly every night. It’s better for both of us this way, rather than eating alone.”

  “Are you sure?” Kevin looked almost embarrassed. Fen supposed he wouldn’t know what to think either, if someone who was practically a stranger invited him for a standing dinner date.

  “I’m making pasta with shrimp tomorrow,” he said. “And strawberry shortcake.”

  Kevin grinned. “Can’t exactly say no to that. I’ll be here. Same time?”

  Fen nodded. “Same time.”

  Kevin backed out into the hallway, toward the stairs and the fifth floor. He smiled and waved. It took Fen a good minute to shut his door and slide down the wall in his entranceway all the way to the hardwood floor.

  What am I doing?

  Kevin was only twenty-three. Twenty-three. But six years wasn’t that big a difference, was it? Only three years younger than Ben and Rory. Not a big deal at all. And he was beautiful. Fen wasn’t ever going to get tired of looking at him. If Fen got a chance to say yes, it was going to be hard to resist it even if he should. And who knew if he should resist it? Kevin was only in town for a few months, but he was sweet and gorgeous and he made Fen laugh. He made him awkward and dorky again, made him look forward to another day just so he could see what happened next. No harm in that, right? It was fun.

  A little fun never killed anybody.

  RORY SLUMPED back in the booth at Beaver’s. He’d picked at his nachos and had a few sips of beer but to Fen the poor guy looked done. Fen’s focus wasn’t on Rory, though, as much as he knew it should be. He kept thinking about Kevin—about his sweet, soft voice, and his perfect skin, and dark hair, and those big goofy eyes. He was like… an overgrown puppy or something, all helpless and adorable, but still like he knew exactly how cute he was. Fen had really wanted to touch him the night before. He’d definitely wanted to kiss him too, although he wasn’t quite sure he was ready to admit that. Even to himself.

  “Look at us,” Rory muttered. “If you and Ben were the trouble twins, we’re the depressing twins.”

  But Fen wasn’t depressed, he was just all antsy and weird and flushy, and he didn’t know what to do about it. He felt like he needed action. He had to go somewhere. Sitting around all summer and doing fuck all with his friends like always wasn’t going to work.

  “I’m all jumpy, like my skin isn’t quite holding me in,” he said to Rory.

  Rory sighed. “I wish. It’s like a huge chore for me to even get out of bed in the morning. Half the time I just lie there until lunch. I just….”

  “Miss Ben’s bed?” Okay, that was pushing and he felt a little bad about it. Fen just wanted them to get over whatever their damn problem was.

  “I don’t want to talk about it.” Rory glared at him.

  “Surprise of the century. Eat your nachos. I know you’re not hungry, just… eat.”

  Rory listlessly picked up a chip and took a nibble out of it. Fen thought of the way Kevin had gratefully wolfed down his fajitas the night before and smiled to himself.

  “Hey, I have an idea,” Rory said after a few long moments of silence.

  “What’s up?” Fen asked.

  “I was supposed to help my mom in her shop this summer, right? She usually hires someone but I was just going to do it to keep my mind off stuff and get some extra money. I just… don’t feel like it anymore.” Rory took a long breath like it was hard for him to dea
l with doing it.

  “So?”

  “So why don’t you do it?”

  Fen snorted. “I don’t know anything about flowers. And if I tried to put, like, a bouquet thing together it would look more like Charlie Brown’s Christmas tree than like anything someone would pay for.”

  Rory laughed a little. It was the first time Fen had seen him even try since the day Jeremy had tossed him into the pool. “You won’t have to do any arranging. Mostly just busy work—taking orders, watering, pulling out wilted flowers, cleaning, working the register. It’s easy work and you said you can’t seem to sit still.”

  It was more than that. Nothing in Fen’s body felt still at all, like his insides were filled with helium and he was about to float away. Yes. Working would probably help. Help out Rory too. His sad little face would probably kill the flowers anyway.

  “You think your mom would go for it?”

  “Sure. She’ll like you. It’s only three days a week anyway. She’s mostly fine on her own, it’s just wedding season. She needs extra time for all the arrangements.”

  “Well, if she’s okay with it and I don’t ruin her shop, I could use a little bit of extra cash and something to do.” Fen shrugged. It wasn’t a bad idea all around, unless the distraction would be good for Rory. Somehow, he didn’t think so. Not when the guy could barely drag himself out of bed.

  “I’ll call her tonight.”

  Fen felt like reaching across the table and strangling the listlessness out of his friend. He wanted to play Cupid and get the people he loved back to where they were supposed to be, but Rory shut down so hard every time he tried to bring it up. He didn’t think it was a good idea to do it again. So he’d work in the flower shop. Hopefully it would help both of them a little.

  Chapter 3

  “I CAN’T believe you made all that. I’m stuffed. I couldn’t stop eating.” Kevin flopped down on Fen’s couch like he lived there. Fen had always been the friendly sort, never minded if people crashed at his place or came to use the pool, but there was something different about how Kevin looked like he belonged there, like he’d been there all along and somehow meshed with the place, giving it life it had never had before and a sense of home it had definitely been missing.

  “What games do you have?” Kevin asked, checking out Fen’s PlayStation.

  “What games do you like to play?” Oh yeah, cause that didn’t come out sounding pervy as hell. Fen’s face flushed hot.

  Kevin raised his eyebrow and grinned a little. “You really want the answer to that so soon?”

  Fen smacked his arm lightly. “Shut up…. Maybe.”

  “Well then I’m always down for anything that involves clothing removal, but if that isn’t what you’re talking about, then racing is good.”

  “Racing it is.”

  Fen got up to talk himself down from a raging blush and take his time putting the game in. Pretty soon, he realized there wasn’t a way to do it without sticking his ass in Kevin’s face unless he was super awkward and obvious about turning to the side and squatting. So he tried to get it over with as fast as he could, because flirting or not, ass in the face really wasn’t the picture he wanted Kevin to leave with.

  He put the game in his system and handed Kevin his controller.

  “Okay, big talker. It’s time to get your ass kicked.”

  FEN SHOULD’VE known better. A few games later he was begging for mercy while Kevin laughed at his outrage.

  “How the hell are you so good at this? Nobody else can beat me.”

  “Guess I’m good with my hands,” Kevin said. His grin was sly and definitely flirtatious. Fen would’ve flirted back if he wasn’t busy having a quick panic attack over it.

  “You as good at shooting as you are driving?”

  Kevin rolled his eyes and sighed theatrically. “It doesn’t require nearly as much skill, but I suppose I could play a few games and let you win.”

  Fen laughed and poked him hard in the side. “You wish.”

  ANOTHER TORTUROUS hour and three games later, Kevin had to get home to go to sleep. He didn’t kiss Fen. Again. And this time, Fen was damn sure he wanted it. Yeah, he didn’t care much if Kevin was a guy, didn’t care much if he’d never done more than think about it before. He wanted. A lot. But he didn’t get it. Kevin left him with a thunking pulse and more frustration than he’d felt since he was a dorky teenager. In a weird way, it was kinda nice.

  FEN LOVED afternoons by the pool on his own. Not too many, ’cause that got boring, but every once in a while it was nice to chill with his music and his own thoughts—and about a gallon of 50 SPF, of course. He got his iPod lined up on the right playlist, made sure every millimeter of exposed skin was properly slathered up with lotion, then closed his eyes and relaxed.

  Which was fantastic until a freezing cold drop of water landed on his forehead.

  “What the….”

  Fen sat up and immediately conked his head on a bottle, the same bottle that had probably been dripping condensation on him just moments before.

  “Ouch.” Kevin. Of course. “You know you’re not supposed to have glass bottles down here.”

  “I’ve seen you do it before.”

  That was beside the point. “Well, I didn’t hit my head on mine.”

  “You going to tattle on me?” Kevin reached out and brushed chilly fingers over Fen’s forehead. He looked apologetic. And a little like he was about to burst into laughter. “I didn’t mean for you to hit your head on it.”

  “Sure you didn’t.” Fen smirked at him. He also waited until Kevin put his drink and his phone and wallet down before he surged up and pushed him into the pool, flip-flops, khaki shorts, and all.

  Fen leaned over and peered into the pool. “Oops. I didn’t mean for you to fall in.”

  Kevin barked out a loud laugh. “Like hell you didn’t.” He reached out and snagged one of Fen’s ankles and yanked. Fen hadn’t been bracing himself. He wasn’t trying too hard to avoid Kevin’s grasp anyway. He flopped belly first into the water and came up splashing, laughing, and trying not to choke on the water.

  Kevin launched himself right on top of Fen and dunked them underwater. It was hard to giggle and splash and hold his breath all at once. Fen tried to buck Kevin off, but his skin was slippery with sunscreen and Kevin was all supple muscle and slick skin. Finally Fen rolled him so Kevin couldn’t hang on. He flopped backward laughing and used both arms to send a veritable tidal wave at Fen’s face. Fen came up sputtering.

  “Look who got the last laugh,” Kevin said with a cheeky grin.

  “You think?”

  Fen went for Kevin again, but misjudged the distance between them and instead of splashing him, he ended up flopping into thin air and landing with his arms around Kevin’s neck, their faces—and crotches—way closer than he’d estimated. Kevin’s hands slid onto his hips, keeping him from catapulting right into his face and breaking one or both of their noses. They were frozen, inches away from each other. Fen knew he had to move, do something to get out of Kevin’s arms, where he was likely to make a total idiot out of himself in about a minute flat. Especially if he kept feeling Kevin’s smooth chest brush against his, or the warmth of Kevin’s thighs through his thin swim shorts.

  “Hi,” Kevin said quietly.

  “Uh, hi,” Fen said in return. He tried to look cool. Inside his heart was about to explode from his chest.

  “You okay?”

  “Yeah. Just misjudged that one a bit.” They were still super close. Fen didn’t want to move and it seemed like Kevin didn’t either. Kevin’s face drifted a bit closer. Fen’s pulse, if anything, sped up.

  Fuck. Yes. Yes. He’s gonna kiss me.

  And of course. Of course at that moment a small herd of children and their harried mother opened the gate to the pool area and swarmed in. Fen was all for kissing Kevin—he’d already decided that a few days ago—he just wasn’t all for giving a mom and a group of kids a free show. Apparently neither was Kevin.

/>   Kevin made a tiny pouty face and pulled back. Then he winked at Fen and swam toward the edge of the pool, where he hauled himself out like some Greek freaking god, all coppery skin and wetness and fucking damn it to hell. Fen wasn’t sure how much more of this his poor little heart could take before it just gave up.

  Fen wanted to growl out loud. Instead, he got to spend a good five minutes in the pool watching the rug rats from 2B playing with water noodles while their mother sipped a diet Coke and read Cosmo while his seriously unfortunate crotch issue disappeared.

  Fantastic.

  “HI MRS. Newton, I’m here!” Fen called into the quiet of the little florist shop.

  Two minutes and he liked it there already. Their interview had been more of a social hour, gossiping about Rory and Ben over tea and cupcakes before Rory’s mom showed him the ropes. There hadn’t been a single hoop to jump through. Compared to the tribunal he’d had to face to get into the school district, it was a dream. Plus, he totally loved Rory’s mom. Basically his kind of job. Too bad he’d never be able to live on the money she could pay him.

  “Hi, sweetheart. You ready for your first day?” Rory’s mom came bustling out of the back, hair in a big bun with wisps of wavy, fading brown hair peeking out around the scarf she’d tied around her head, tendrils falling all over her face, and a button-down open over a long jersey knit dress. She had her apron on and the gloves she wore when she cut roses. Rory’s mom had a faded kind of beauty—no sharp edges, only fair colors, wispy hair and soft skin, and even softer, wispier clothes. Her eyes were big and sweet and she was more like Rory than Fen would’ve even imagined. He’d liked her instantly.

  “I’m ready-ish,” Fen admitted. He’d run his own classroom since he was twenty-four, but the thought of trying to work a cash register and take orders made him sweat.