Friends with Benefits (Friend Zone Series Book 3)

by Nicole Blanchard

  “You can always count on me,” he said.

  “Great. Fine.” Shame was beginning to heat my cheeks. “Will you let me up now?”

  I closed my eyes and waited for him to comply.

  Except he didn’t move away. I could still feel him everywhere.

  “Tripp?”

  “I’m thinking.”

  “Could you think faster before I die of embarrassment?”

  “What are you embarrassed about?”

  “Can we not have this conversation while you’re on top of me? I can still feel your dick.”

  “You’re the one who started it,” he said. “In fact, you were pretty persistent.”

  “Can you not tease me right now?” His hips flexed, and my eyes flew open. “What are you doing?’

  “Well, you told me not to tease you.” Tripp’s fingers linked with mine, his hold gentle. The heat from my face moved between my legs. “And I never leave a woman unsatisfied.”

  “Tripp…”

  “Hush, I’m trying to concentrate now.”

  His head ducked, and his lips pressed against mine. I thought he’d be eager, dominating, but his lips were gentle, almost nonexistent.

  It made me want more.

  So much more.

  Chapter Ten

  Tripp

  Sophomore Year

  “C’mon, man,” Alex begged. “It’s the off-season. Coach Taylor is finally giving us a break. You’re killing me.” He threw himself onto my couch and gave me a puppy-dog look.

  I didn’t look up from my homework, although I wasn’t taking in any of the words I was reading. My pen tapped repetitively against the desk. “I’m not doing shit to you. I said you should go, so fucking go.”

  My urging did nothing to thwart Alex’s goal. Naturally. “It’s my first year in town, and you’re supposed to be my role model. Introduce me to all the hot spots. Be my wingman. It goes against the bro code for you to ditch me this way.”

  “You’re a grown-ass man. You can get an Uber. Besides, what happened to all that game you said you had up north? Does that Yankee charm not work here in the South?” I spared a glance at him and grinned good-naturedly. The prick could have anyone he wanted. I didn’t know why he was complaining.

  Alex wiggled his eyebrows. “Oh, it works just fine. I just don’t see how you can waste such a prime opportunity on our first weekend off in months.”

  Except it didn’t feel like a prime opportunity to me. I didn’t want to go out barhopping and get smothered by women. The thought would have been appealing a year ago, but now…

  “Tripp, did you have a chance to—” Ember’s voice cut off as she barged into my apartment toting a twin on each hip. She smiled at Alex, who sent me a knowing smirk. “Sorry, I didn’t realize you had company. I can come back,” she offered.

  Now, this was what I wanted, and hell if I knew why. She was complicated with a capital C, but I couldn’t get her out of my head. I’d take her, if she’d let me, complications and all.

  Alex launched himself bodily from the couch to schmooze to her side. “Don’t apologize, sweetness. We haven’t had the pleasure of meeting. I’m Alex Lockwood. I play on the team with Tripp.”

  The flare of jealousy in my chest had me taking a step back from the two of them. In the year since I’d known Ember, I’d come to terms with the fact that a relationship of any kind was out of the cards. That didn’t make seeing her getting hit on any easier. Least of all by my best friend. He knew about her and her about him, but she was so busy with her sisters and him with ball that they hadn’t really had the chance to meet.

  Ember nodded since her hands were full. “Nice to finally meet you.” The twins wriggled and babbled away, fighting to get Ember to release her hold and let them down. “I’m sorry to interrupt. I’ll get out of your hair.”

  “Let’s not be hasty,” Alex said smoothly. “Why don’t you come in?” Deftly, he maneuvered Tillie out of Ember’s hands. She watched him with an amused smile—the way she used to watch me. “Hey there, cutie.”

  Tillie squealed and began to talk my ear off. When Alex smiled at Molly, Molly grinned, stuck her thumb in her mouth, and hid her face in Ember’s hair.

  “Hey!” I said to Tillie. “I thought you were my girl!”

  Alex heaved a fake sigh and said to Tillie, “Don’t worry, all the ladies fall for me eventually. Don’t let Tripp bother you.”

  Tillie giggled, and Ember was beaming. “Don’t put any ideas into her head,” she warned. “She already thinks she runs the world.”

  “Naturally,” Alex said and bounced Tillie on his hip. Coming from a big family, he was used to having children around. He might put on a big player front, but I always secretly thought the dude wanted the whole wife-and-kids deal more than most of the guys on our team. His parents, like mine, had been together forever. Just because he enjoyed women and partying didn’t mean that wasn’t his end goal.

  Turning to me, Ember said, “I’m sorry for interrupting. I’ve been running around like a chicken with my head cut off. I’ll only be a second, and then I’ll get out of your hair.”

  She didn’t know how much I liked having her in my hair. I wished she’d stay there, make a little nest like a bird, and never leave. I cleared my throat. “What’s up?”

  Molly had come out of hiding and was smiling shyly at Alex. “These two need a zookeeper. I can’t get anything done for their birthday party. I was going to ask if you’d had a chance to blow up their balloons, but I can see that you’re busy.” With the ease of someone who had cared for them their whole lives, Ember scooped Tillie from Alex’s grasp and arranged her on her free hip. “You two have fun, and we’ll see you later.”

  Somehow, she managed to open the door and squeeze out before I could even cross the room. For a girl carrying two kids—and they weren’t little ones anymore, either—she could certainly move like lightning. She could have given some of the guys on my team a run for their money—literally.

  Ignoring a pleading look from Alex, I followed quickly behind her.

  “Em, wait up!”

  She didn’t turn to look at me. “Don’t worry about it. You’re busy.”

  “Not too busy for you,” I said and squeezed behind her into her apartment before she could shut the door in my face. I didn’t know what it was about her, but the more she pushed me away, the more I tried.

  “I’m serious. Go enjoy your friend. You’ve had a long year. You should go enjoy yourself. Besides, what would all your groupies think if you turn into a homebody?”

  “My groupies? Really, Em?”

  “What else am I supposed to call the chicks who hang around your apartment all the time? On game days, it’s like a friggin’ mob.”

  So, she did think about me. “Jealous?” I asked and took Tillie from her arms when she began to wriggle for me. To Tillie, I said, “I think your sister’s jealous.”

  “No,” Ember replied vehemently. “I’m not jealous.”

  “C’mon Ember, be real with me.” I thought being on the mound during a championship game was nerve-wracking. It was nothing compared to waiting for her answer. Until that moment, I hadn’t realized it meant so much to me.

  I was in trouble.

  Instead of answering, she changed the subject. I tried not to look too disappointed. “You were going to leave your friends to come to the twins’ birthday party, weren’t you?” She didn’t sound as impressed as I thought she would. “Why would you do that?”

  “What do you mean? You told me you needed help, so I’m here, helping.” It seemed like an easy conclusion, so I didn’t understand why she was looking at me like I had broken her heart.

  “You were supposed to go out tonight with Alex, weren’t you? That’s why he was over at your apartment.” Her voice was accusatory, and her hip was cocked like she was spoiling for a fight.

  I pushed a hand through my hair. “Yeah, he was going out to the clubs and wanted me to wingman for him. I told him no,” I added de
fensively, but that only seemed to make her even angrier.

  Green eyes flashing, she said, “I didn’t ask you to do that, Tripp.”

  “You didn’t have to ask me. I wanted to.” What the hell was going on here?

  I thought it would make her understand, but it only seemed to her piss her off even more as I tried to explain. She shook her head. “That’s the problem.”

  “You’re freaking out for no reason. I said I would help you, so that’s what I’m planning on doing.”

  She frowned at me. “Stay here. I’m going to go put the twins down for a nap, and then we’ll talk.”

  That didn’t bode well. I could only nod because there was no way I was walking away from her.

  I sat on the couch because the recliner smelled like smoke from when her mom was around chain-smoking and watching her soap operas. My parents would have murdered me if they ever knew I had tried a cigarette in the tenth grade. The image of her mom was so outlandish I couldn’t wrap my brain around it.

  But that didn’t scare me away.

  I didn’t think anything could.

  A half-hour later, she emerged, pushing the hair back from her head. I started to get to my feet, but she gestured for me to stay seated and took her place by my side.

  “Look,” she began wearily, “it’s not your responsibility to shape your life around me.”

  “The hell is that supposed to mean?”

  “It means that we can be friends. I like having you in my life. You’re an amazing person. But like I told you when we first met, it can’t be anything more than that.”

  Who was she trying to convince? Me…or herself?

  “What does that have to do with today?” I asked.

  “I want you to go out and have fun,” she said firmly.

  “But it’s their birthday.”

  “They’re going to be three. They’ll barely know the difference. We can celebrate together tomorrow or something.”

  “But I thought you needed help putting the decorations together and picking up the cake.”

  “I can handle it on my own. That’s the point, Tripp. I don’t want you to put aside your life because you think there’s something going on here.” She kept going before I could interrupt. “Please, do this for me. I need for you to go out and have fun. Do it for me, since I can’t,” she said with a laugh, but it was devoid of humor.

  “I don’t understand why it’s such a big deal to you. I wanted to help you out, as your friend.” That was a lie. Maybe she had a point. “But if it means so much to you, I won’t come. Even though this sounds backassward. Are you sure you don’t need help?”

  “Yes,” she replied firmly. “I can handle it. I have to be able to do these things on my own. I’m grateful, more than you can even imagine, that you want to help me. But you can’t always help me, and I need to be able to stand on my own two feet.”

  “You already do too much,” I said, thinking of her absent parents.

  “I’m a big girl.”

  Stubborn. God, she was stubborn.

  Funnily enough, it reminded me of Tillie and the way she tried to do everything herself. I wonder where she got that from?

  “Alright, then, I guess.” I got to my feet, suddenly ready to be as far away from her apartment as possible. If she wanted me to keep my distance, I guess I needed to be told twice for me to get it through my thick skull. A year of being held at arm’s length should have done the trick, but practically forcing me to be with other people worked just as well.

  “I’ll see you later,” I said.

  Chapter Eleven

  Ember

  Kissing Tripp was unlike anything I’d ever experienced.

  I thought it was romance novel bullshit. How a connection could be so instantaneous with someone. But when Tripp pressed me deep into the couch and kissed me like I was the best thing he had ever tasted, I thought maybe I was wrong. It had never been like this with Chris.

  Effortless.

  There was no self-doubt, no self-consciousness.

  There was only heat and need.

  The more I kissed him, the more I wanted him.

  It scared me how much I wanted him.

  Hell, he’d scared me since the day I met him.

  No matter how hard I pushed him away, he was always there. Unruffled, patient, kind. An unshakeable rock.

  “Wait,” I said and put a hand on his chest. Somehow, I managed to pull myself away, slip out from underneath him, and put some distance between us. I ended up in the kitchen, but I could have been across the continent, and it wouldn’t have been enough.

  Whatever wheels I was putting into motion here weren’t going to brake as easily as that.

  “Tripp, I—”

  Tripp held up a hand. “You don’t have to say anything. I—you don’t have to say anything.”

  I wanted to pull my hair out. “Stop, just stop. You don’t have to be so understanding all the time. It was wrong of me. I never should have crossed that line. Stop being so nice. I’m jerking you around, and we both know it.”

  I didn’t understand how he couldn’t see it. I was taking advantage of his kindness. Jerking him around by messing around with him, then telling him there was no chance for a future with me. I was damaged goods. I come with too much baggage. What part of that didn’t he understand?

  He rose from the couch and herded me with his body toward the kitchen island. “You want me to stop being nice?”

  “Yes!” I said, my voice breaking with exasperation. “The things I’m asking of you aren’t fair. You have to know that. I’m not in a healthy place right now.”

  He was so close that I could see the pulse beating in his throat. It was as steady as his gaze, which was locked into mine. “You think I can’t handle you?” He smirked a little. “I’m a big boy. I know what I’m doing. But I’m also not an asshole. If all you can handle is friendship, then that’s what I’m here for. If you want a little something more, then I’m telling you that I want you.”

  I placed my hands on his shoulders. “Wait, so what are you saying? Are you saying you want to be…friends…with benefits?” The incredulous tone in my voice cracked a little. We were in college, but we had never entered the world of casual sex. Tripp had flirted, hard, and often, but he’d never been a complete manwhore. And I’d blown off every guy who tried to hit on me but Chris.

  “I want you. If that’s what you want, I’m willing to give it to you.”

  “That’s not fair to you.” I shook my head, trying to clear it of the haze of lust. “No. We can’t do that. Situations like that are how people get hurt, and you’re the last person I would ever want to hurt. “

  He thumbed my cheek and smiled a little. “You don’t have to add me to the list of people you take care of.”

  “I don’t want to take care of you,” I said hotly, but his words rang with a truth I couldn’t ignore. Chris had said something of the sort a time or two.

  He clearly wasn’t convinced. “You want to take care of everyone. Your patients, your sisters, your parents. Your friends. Who takes care of you, Em?”

  “You’re starting to piss me off. Give me some space.” How the conversation had devolved so completely, I couldn’t understand. This was precisely the reason I didn’t want to get involved with anyone in the first place. I tried to shove my way around him, but it was like trying to drain the ocean: impossible.

  “No, I’m not giving you space. Not this time.”

  “I take it back. Offer rescinded.”

  His breath was hot on my lips. I licked mine without conscious thought. “You can’t take it back,” he said.

  I tried to use reason. “We have to leave soon. The twins will be home, and it’ll take an hour to get them ready and over to your parents’ with rush hour traffic.”

  Tripp didn’t budge. How had I mistaken him for the happy-go-lucky sort? Underneath that puppy dog exterior was a pit bull. “Stop making excuses. Stop trying to think your way through everything. T
ell me what you want.”

  “I think—”

  “Not what you think. What do you want?”

  “Tripp—”

  “What. Do. You. Want?”

  His arms were on either side of me, caging me against the island. Our faces were so close I could see the darker striations in his eyes. Dark blue, light grey.

  My hands lifted of their own volition, and my gaze followed where they stroked along his strong arms up to his shoulders. I glanced back up and saw his eyelashes flutter closed. The skin at his neck was warm and smooth.

  What did I want? I wanted to taste him there again.

  So for once, without thinking, I did.

  The moment my lips tasted his skin, he abolished the distance between us and pressed me into the island countertop. The edge dug into my back, but all I cared about was the weight of him moving against me. He was so tall, so solid, that he blotted out everything outside of our little bubble. The world shrank to just the two of us, and, for that moment, I didn’t need anyone or anything else.

  One of his hands lifted to cup my head, his fingers sifting through my hair. I moved to take the kiss deeper, but he broke off. “That’s not an answer.”

  “What do you want from me?”

  “I want you to say it.”

  My cheeks burned. “Tripp,” I protested.

  “Tell me.”

  “I want you,” I said. “Please.”

  He seemed to react better when I was kissing him, so I brought my lips to his throat. I seemed to have an obsession with the taste of his skin. I felt his responding groan against my mouth, and his hands dug into my waist.

  “Ground rules,” he said hoarsely. “We have to have rules.”

  “Since when does big bad Tripp Wilder care about rules?” I asked and reached up on my tippy toes to tug at his earlobe with my teeth. He groaned and clamped a hand on my head to keep me there. Tripp liked that. I did it again and felt him shudder against me.

  “I care about you,” he said. “I don’t want you to get hurt.”

  “You wouldn’t hurt me.” I knew that unequivocally. “I want to know what you meant when you said that sex could be good. I want to enjoy it without worrying too much about feelings.”