Educating Holden (Wishing Well, Texas Book 11)
Page 19
I chuckled as I walked down the front path and checked my phone. Holden had texted me about fifteen minutes ago saying that things were winding down at the poker bachelor party and he was going to head home. I was checking to see if he’d texted again, but he hadn’t.
My trip home to grab Channing was not arbitrary. I hoped to see Holden and maybe fit in a quickie before I headed back with Channing. He’d offered to keep Channing tonight, but there was no way that I was going to deprive my dog of a night filled with twenty admirers. He was going to be in hog heaven. Holden thought I’d already picked him and my overnight bag up, but I was waiting until I knew he was home, to surprise him. I could do things like that now, surprise my boyfriend.
Since the condo was only two blocks away, and my car was trapped behind four other vehicles, I decided to walk home. It was a beautiful night. The velvety dark sky was sprinkled with bright shining stars. The crickets were chirping. And I don’t think I’d ever felt happier.
As I walked down the block, it hit me that right now, in this moment, my life was perfect. I had everything I’d ever wanted. I mean, yes, I did want to marry Holden one day and have his babies. But I was sure that would come. We’d already talked about it.
We’d talked about a lot of stuff this past week. I’d told him how in high school I would fantasize that he’d come back and walk in my class, pick me up, and carry me out like Richard Gere in Officer and a Gentleman. Or how many hours I had daydreamed about him showing up before prom in a tux, like my very own Prince Charming. Or later in college how I’d imagined him coming into my dorm or study hall and confessing his love for me, Jerry Maguire style.
Every time I’d brought up the subject of how long I’d been pining after him, it seemed to make him feel bad. He would put himself down and say that he was an asshole or a selfish prick and that he didn’t deserve me. He would promise that he would make it up to me.
I didn’t tell him those things to make him feel bad. If anything, it was just so he’d know how much I loved him. But he’d had such a strong reaction whenever I shared anything about my feelings for him in the past that I hadn’t brought up the letter I’d written to him and slipped in his bag yet. I was going to one day, but I figured we had time.
As I turned the corner on our street, I immediately checked for Holden’s truck. It wasn’t there. I’d go in, grab chips and Channing and if he wasn’t home in fifteen minutes I’d head back to the party. But if he did come home during that time, then I’d at least get in a kiss, hopefully more.
It blew my mind that I could kiss Holden anytime I wanted. When we’d been at the rehearsal dinner earlier, I’d been watching him hanging out with my brother from across the room, so I just went over and kissed him. I could do that now. It was crazy.
Bentley wasn’t thrilled. The opposite actually, he made gagging noises. Until Maisy saw him and gave him a look. Then he stopped immediately. I loved that girl.
My brother had been giving us a hard time, especially when he saw us together. But separately, he’d told us how happy he was that two of the people he loved most in the world loved each other. He’d told me that he knew Holden was going to take care of me and treat me right. He’d told Holden that if he even thought about hurting me, he’d end up at the bottom of Emerald Cove Lake.
It was nice to know where Bentley’s loyalties lay.
I was smiling from ear to ear when I heard a voice I didn’t recognize. The country night was so quiet that anyone speaking outside, even at a normal tone, their voice would carry for miles. Well not miles, but a long distance. I couldn’t really tell where it was coming from, so I ignored it.
Until, that is, I walked up my driveway and saw that the voice I’d heard belonged to an incredibly tall, incredibly gorgeous woman standing on Holden’s porch. She was talking on the phone and didn’t notice me walk up. I didn’t recognize her but there was something familiar about her.
I was going to go ask her if she needed anything, since I knew Holden wasn’t home, when I heard her say, “He’s not home but I texted him and told him I was here. He said he’s on his way.”
My heart sank like the Titanic. It was then that I realized why she looked familiar. She was Luciana, Holden’s ex. I froze, unable to breathe.
Why was she here?
Why had she texted him?
Why had he said he was on his way?
My entire body went numb. I couldn’t feel my legs as I rushed quietly up onto my own porch, hoping not to draw any attention to myself. My hands shook as I pulled my keys from my purse and tried to unlock the door.
Channing started barking excitedly and I hurried inside. When I closed the door behind me he jumped on me and I pulled him into my arms, needing to feel the solidness of his body. He kissed my face as I stood there trying to catch my breath.
When he started barking again, I realized it was because he heard Holden’s truck pulling up. Oh shit. If Holden knew that I hadn’t picked up Channing yet, he might come over to check on him.
“Shh! Shh!” I frantically shushed him, before remembering what Holden had taught me about calm assertive energy. I took a deep breath and tried to be zen as I snapped my fingers and said a quick, “Chh.” All of which I’d copied from the Dog Whisperer.
Channing instantly obeyed. He stopped barking and plopped down on his butt. When he quieted down, I heard Holden’s truck door open and I leaned my ear against my front door. I hadn’t eavesdropped since I was a kid, but Molly and I used to be really good at it. I sank down to get closest to the doorknob, which we’d discovered was the sweet spot for optimal audio quality.
“Hey!” He didn’t sound happy to see her, which made me feel like I could breathe a little bit. “What are you doing here?”
“I needed to talk to you. You weren’t returning my texts. For months.”
Yes! I inwardly did flips.
“I’ve been dealing with some stuff. What’s up?” He sounded tense, but friendly.
There was a moment when I couldn’t hear anything, and I tried to push my ear harder against the wood. What was going on? Were they saying something? Hugging? Or worse, kissing?
Finally, I heard Luciana ask, “Can we go inside?”
No! My inner voice screamed.
“I don’t think that’s a good idea. I have a girlfriend.”
Yes! I had to cover my mouth not to squeal with glee.
“I’m pregnant.” Luciana said.
I pressed my ear harder to the door.
“You’re what?”
“I’m pregnant,” she repeated.
That was the last thing I heard. I assume they went inside but I didn’t hear his door open or close. All I could hear was a sound like rushing water in my head. I sank all the way down to the floor and my breaths were coming in really short pants.
I’d hyperventilated once before a competition when I was ten, so I recognized the signs. My lips were numb and I was dizzy. I was trying to slow my breathing but no matter what I did it was getting shallower and shallower. I tried to think where I would have a paper bag, that’s what I’d used when I was a kid. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d even seen a paper bag.
I was really starting to panic that I might pass out, although maybe it wouldn’t be so bad. At least if I was unconscious, I wouldn’t have to deal with what I’d just heard.
Channing must have sensed my stress because he laid his head on me. The weight of his body anchored me, and I felt my heart rate start to slow. I started petting him and my body began to relax.
I was just starting to calm down when my phone buzzed. I pulled it out of my purse, hoping it would be from Holden. Which was ridiculous, he was a little busy right now. It was a text from Molly.
Molly: Chips and Channing! Chips and Channing! Chips and Channing!
Seeing the icon of my sister’s face made me want to cry. I wanted to call my sister and tell her I needed her. I wanted to go back to the party and tell her exactly what I’d overheard. But I knew I c
ouldn’t do that.
If I told Molly, she was so drunk she’d tell someone, and they’d tell someone and pretty soon everyone at the sleepover would know about Holden, Luciana, and the baby and that’s what the whole night would be about, and maybe even tomorrow. This wasn’t about me or my drama. It was about Maisy. I had to put everything I’d just audibly witnessed out of my head.
I was the MOH. Sunday I could have the nervous breakdown I deserved. Tonight, I had to suck it up, go back to the party, and pretend like nothing had happened. Tonight it was all about chips and Channing.
Chapter 32
Holden
“What comes easy won’t last, what lasts won’t come easy.”
~ Maggie Calhoun
I checked my phone again to see if Olivia had called me back yet. She hadn’t. Last night, I’d texted her and told her to call me as soon as she got a chance, I never heard from her. I’d tried to call her several times this morning, but my calls kept ringing and then going to voicemail. Which meant she was sending them to voicemail.
“My car’s here.” Luci looked up from her phone and put on her oversized sunglasses. “Thanks again, for talking to me and letting me crash here.”
“Sure.”
“I wish I could’ve met Olivia.” She stood up and grabbed the handle of her overnight bag. “She sounds amazing!”
“She is.”
“Well, maybe next time.”
“Maybe.” I nodded.
“I’m happy for you.” I knew that she was, we didn’t lie to each other.
“I’m happy for you, too.” I looked down at her barely showing belly.
I opened the door and she kissed me as she walked out. “Bye, Holden.”
“Bye, Luci.”
I watched her go, relieved that she’d finally left.
This morning I’d wanted to go over to Maisy’s, where all the girls were getting ready, to try and catch Liv before she went to the church. But Luci, being Luci, had been running late. Her car service was supposed to pick her up at seven a.m. but she’d pushed it back. In fairness to her, she was experiencing morning sickness, which was why she’d showed up in the first place.
The reason she’d been trying to contact me was not because she wanted to have some big relationship talk. She’d reached out to me because we were friends and she wanted to get my advice on her situation. She’d gotten pregnant by her soccer player boyfriend and she was scared if she had the baby he wouldn’t be there, and she’d be a single mom.
Since I was one of the only people, she knew who had grown up in a happy family, she’d wanted to talk to me to see if I thought she could do it on her own. I’d shared some of the stories of the kids I’d met at my brother’s ranch and said that no parents are perfect. Kids just need love and stability and she could provide both of those things. I reminded her that she’d come to this country, alone at age sixteen and hadn’t spoken the language. She’d traveled the world the past fourteen years and learned not only English, but also French and some Japanese. She was an intelligent, resourceful, strong woman with a lot of love in her heart to give and any kid would be lucky to have her.
And I was telling the truth. Anything that Luci set her mind to, she achieved. She was going to be a great mom.
I think that’s all she really needed to hear. Once she explained why she’d been trying so hard to reach me, it made sense. Her circle of friends were more interested in how many Instagram followers they had, and where the next party was, than they were in real life and real people.
Even though I knew I hadn’t done anything wrong, it felt sketchy that my ex had been here last night, and Olivia didn’t know. I’d slept at Olivia’s and let Luci crash at my place, just to be even more on the safe side, but it still felt wrong.
I needed to talk to her before the wedding. It was almost ten and the wedding was at eleven. I was already dressed in my shirt and slacks, I grabbed my tie, jacket and my cane and was out the door. Not as fast as I wanted, but at least I was walking.
It was so strange the perspective change I’d had over the past week. I felt like a different person. I was a different person. And it was all because of Olivia.
I drove by Maisy’s and saw that no cars were in the driveway. The girls must already be at the church. I flipped a U-turn and headed toward the church. I may have rolled through couple of stop signs on my way, but I couldn’t shake this urgency that I needed to talk to her.
It wasn’t like her to not text me back and to send my calls to voicemail, even if she was busy. In my gut, I knew something was wrong.
My tires ate up the gravel as I took a short cut and pulled up in the back of the building. I figured the girls were in the children’s church area because that’s where all the brides got ready before their ceremony.
I just hoped the back door was open. I got out, grabbing my cane and did my best to push past the pain I felt when my feet hit the ground. I wanted to rush in but I knew it was going to be a long day, so I took the time to breathe until the pain subsided. My restraint was rewarded when I turned the knob of the back entrance and it opened.
Now I wouldn’t have to make it past any early arrivals who wanted to stop me for chit chat.
When I got to the double wooden doors I heard laughing and talking and there was music playing. It sounded like a party in there. I tried to open the door, but it was locked. I knocked but no one came, so I knocked louder. I was about to look for another way in when the door opened a crack and either Melody or Madison, who were the other two that made up the Turner Triplets, stuck her head out.
“Is Olivia in there? I need to talk to her.”
“No.” Melody or Madison shook her head.
“Do you know where she is?” I tried to look past her because I had a feeling she was in there, but all I could see was the tops of people’s heads.
“Oh, she’s in here but there are no boys allowed.”
“No boys allowed!” Came a shout from some of the other women that were congregated in the room. “No boys allowed!”
I was glad they were having such a good time, it just would’ve been nice if it hadn’t been at my expense. “Can you tell her I’m here? Maybe she can come out. I need to talk to her.”
She leaned back behind the door and there was some indiscernible chatter. When she came back into view she said, “That’s a negative, Ghost Rider.”
“What?” Why was she quoting Top Gun?
“She’s busy. But thanks for stopping by, Holden.”
I must’ve looked upset because Melody or Madison said, “Aww, don’t worry you’ll see her soon. She’ll be the one walking down the aisle toward you before the bride.”
And with that the door was shut in my face and I stood there contemplating kicking it down. There were two problems with my plan. One, it was a little bit extreme when I was going to see the woman in less than an hour. And two, I didn’t think I was actually physically capable of doing it. And if I did manage to pull it off, I’d be in bed for a week.
Not knowing what to do with myself, I texted Bentley to let him know that I was there. He said that he’d be there in twenty. I thought about leaving and coming back, but climbing in and out of the truck would take too much out of me.
I leaned against the wall and the last thing that Melody or Madison said to me played in my head. “She’ll be the one walking down the aisle toward you.”
Suddenly, the trip home was an acceptable risk in the risk reward ratio. I had to go home and get something that I’d bought when I went to Dallas this week to meet with my new therapist, who I’d only had one session with but already had given me some tools to use when I started having negative thoughts. And I had Olivia to thank for that. I had Olivia to thank for everything good in my life right now.
I headed to the door I’d come in, and tried to open it. It didn’t budge. How could a door open from the outside and not from the inside? It didn’t make any sense. I tried it several more times before I saw a tattered sign hanging
that said: Door sticks. Call Ray for assistance.
I didn’t have time to call Ray for assistance. I’d just have to take my chances going out the front and hope that I didn’t run into anyone. If I did, I’d just tell them I had a best man errand to run.
I’d almost made it scot-free. I was outside the church rounding the corner to the back where I’d parked, when I heard my name.
“Holden! Holden!” I looked up, shielding my eyes and saw Mrs. Nelson and she wasn’t alone. There was a young woman with her that, holy shit—it was Alexis Moon. Or Sasha. Her granddaughter’s name was Sasha.
“Come here!” She waved. I want you to meet someone!”
Even meeting Alexis Moon paled in comparison to my mission, but I was raised right, and Mrs. Nelson was my elder. I started to head across the parking lot and thankfully the duo met me halfway.
“Holden Reed, this is Sasha Nelson, you might know her as Alexis Moon.” Mrs. Nelson’s face lit up as if it had been a big reveal.
As if I hadn’t recognized her before then.
I smiled and shook her hand. “It’s nice to meet you.”
“You, too.” The smile that she returned to me didn’t meet her eyes and I was struck by two things.
She was stunning. Even prettier in person than she was on TV. And also, she looked like she’d been crying. Her eyes weren’t puffy but they had red rims around the edges. She looked really sad. Beautiful and sad.
As intrigued as I was to find out what she was doing in Wishing Well, I didn’t have time to stay and chat. “It was so nice to meet you, I was actually just—”
“Holden is a huge fan of Sunset Bay, aren’t you, Holden?” Mrs. Nelson grabbed my arm.
“Yes, ma’am.” I nodded.
“Really?” Sasha’s forehead creased.
“Holden used to be a bull rider, a real-life cowboy, but then he got hurt. They didn’t think he was going to walk again. He had three surgeries and it was touch and go there for a little bit. He moved back to Wishing Well a few months ago and started taking my restorative yoga class. He’s still recovering, and he doesn’t miss a day of Sunset Bay, isn’t that right Holden?”