Southern Hotshot: A North Carolina Highlands Novel

by Peterson, Jessica

  Hank’s brows shoot up. “I heard Emma was back. But Beau said she resigned?”

  “She did. But I’m determined to change that. She says one of us has to go if we’re going to make this work. And of course she thinks it should be her.”

  “No,” Hank says. Voice barely above a grumble. “I’m the one who should go.”

  My gut seizes.

  Milly’s head snaps in his direction. “Go where?”

  “I don’t know. Anywhere but here.”

  “I disagree,” Milly replies. “Running away isn’t going to solve anything.”

  Hank pushes off the sofa and gets to his feet. “Neither is staying, Milly. Look, maybe we all just need some time to cool off and process. Samuel’s right. I can’t be around Emma right now, and Emma shouldn’t have to be around me.”

  I agree with him on all points. But that doesn’t stop me from feeling guilty. And regret—that’s what keeps catching inside my stomach.

  Yes, Hank should go, but I’m going to miss him. How fucked up is that?

  Then again, families are fucked up, even the best ones, so maybe this is just par for the course.

  “Are you resigning?” Milly asks, eyes wide as she stands too.

  Hanks shrugs. “Sure. If that’s what y’all need me to do.”

  “Hank,” I say.

  He cuts me a glare. “This is my call, Samuel. As a matter of fact, it’s something I should’ve done a long time ago. You need to be on the farm for that big wedding we’ve got coming up. Besides, I’m not sure I fit in here.”

  “That’s not true.”

  “Admit it. The farm, the business—that show belongs to you and Beau. Y’all won’t miss me when I’m gone.”

  I grab at him, but he yanks his arm out of my grasp at the last minute. “Stop talking crazy.”

  He rolls his eyes. “I’m not gonna hurt myself. I’m just gonna get gone for a while. Go on that retirement bender I never got around to last year.”

  “But you’ll be back, right?” Milly asks.

  Hank looks me dead in the eye. “You say you need time? Take it. I’m giving you all the time you need to learn to trust me again. Me being out of the picture, it’ll give us all space to breathe. Think.” He slides his hands into the front pockets of his jeans. “Give you and Emma time to be together without me around.”

  “You sure?”

  “If that’s what it takes to keep our family together, yes. I’m sure.”

  Wow. Here’s my baby brother, showing way more maturity than I think I’m capable of.

  Milly puts a hand on his arm. “If you don’t come back, you better believe I’ll hunt you down and drag your ass back to this mountain.”

  Hank laughs. “Oh, I believe it, all right.” He looks at me. “I know we’re not good. We’re not even okay. But this is my good faith gesture here, Samuel. I love you, and I want you to be happy, and I’ll do what it takes to make that happen. If I get to figure my own shit out in the process, well…guess that’s a bonus.”

  He’s right. Despite my anger, in some respects I’m proud of my brother. I just hope Mama doesn’t whoop me for causing a rift between us. Or even worse, I hope she doesn’t take out her frustration on Emma, because she’s not guilty of anything.

  But what Beau said is true. I need to fix my relationship with Hank. Our family needs to stay strong. Focused.

  “Okay,” I say. “Come to tomorrow’s Sunday supper. Then you can go.”

  He nods. “Okay.”

  And then he turns and leaves.

  Milly glances at me. She’s got tears in her eyes.

  I open my arms. “C’mere.”

  She buries her face in my chest. I wrap my arms around her and press a kiss onto the crown of her head.

  “You sure this is a part of your happy ending with Emma?” Milly asks. “Watching your brother walk out the door on his way to God knows where?”

  “It’s not the end. Not for me and Hank, anyway. I promise I won’t let our story end without a happily ever after, okay?”

  She nods. “Okay.”

  I hold her for a while like that, each of us lost in our own thoughts. At last, she draws a quick breath through her nose and straightens. “Now, what’s this about Sunday supper? You’ve got a plan, don’t you?”

  “Girl, you know me too well. Course I got a plan. Wanna help?”

  She grins. “Like you even need to ask.”

  Chat #5

  MyBoyBlue4: Hi. I don’t know if you’ll even get this, but coming here seemed right. Better than sending a text, anyway. This is where we started. And I hope this is where we’ll keep going for years to come.

  [No reply]

  MyBoyBlue4: Okay, well, on the off chance you check the chat, I’d like to invite you to Sunday supper tomorrow. I would really like to talk to you. I’d also like you to see that my family may be bruised, but we’re not broken. Hank and I are actively working on our relationship, and I want you to witness that firsthand. To sweeten the deal, I’ll make Emma’s Cornbread (yes, it’s yours now) and open a bottle or five of that 2016 Screaming Eagle. I’ll do anything to make you feel better. I’m so sorry about how shit went down, Em, and if you’ll let me, I’d like to make it up to you. I’d also like to convince you to stay on at Blue Mountain, but baby steps. Bring your sister if she’s still in town.

  [No reply]

  MyBoyBlue4: I’m sitting here at my computer and thinking about all the times this chat made me smile. You made me come, but you also made me think, Lady V. That’s one hell of a combination. You’re special, and you’re smart, and you’re creative in ways I wish I could be. I love your pervy brand of intelligence. I love the way your legs look in your sensible heels as much as I love the way they look in V’s stilettos. I dream about the way you describe wine, and how fucking sexy your mastery is (in AND outside the bedroom). I love to think about all the cool things we could do together at the resort. I want you to dominate me day and night, and then I want to return the favor. I want to taste you again, baby. I can’t stop thinking about you.

  [No reply]

  MyBoyBlue4: So, yeah. Tomorrow. If you can swing it, I’d love for you to come early. Say around 4?

  **LadyV76 has accepted your chat request**

  **LadyV76 is now in the chat room**

  LadyV76: Hey.

  MyBoyBlue4: Oh my God you’re here. THANK YOU. How are you feeling?

  LadyV76: Like death. You?

  MyBoyBlue4: This bastard got burned. Not by your dragons or anything, but by life I guess. I can still bend the knee to you, though.

  LadyV76: I do like you on your knees.

  MyBoyBlue4: There she is. I’ve missed you, baby.

  LadyV76: I’ve missed you too.

  MyBoyBlue4: Sorry for coming to the chat with this, but I thought you might appreciate it?

  LadyV76: Don’t apologize. I’m glad you came to the chat. I think if I spoke to you on the phone I would just burst into tears.

  MyBoyBlue4: I’m sorry. So fucking sorry about everything.

  LadyV76: I know. And I’d like to come to supper tomorrow. What can I bring?

  MyBoyBlue4: You’ve just made me the happiest man on earth, Khaleesi. Just bring yourself. My only request is that you leave the dragons at home, okay?

  LadyV76: You have a deal. Lindsey is still here, so I’ll bring her too?

  MyBoyBlue4: Awesome. Can’t wait to introduce her to the rest of my family. Please tell her all seven of us are indeed in love with you. There will be no more awkward kisses, however. That I can promise.

  LadyV76: So it’s not necessarily a love triangle as much as a love…heptagon?

  MyBoyBlue4: Of course you’d know what that is.

  LadyV76: You forget that I’m the professor.

  MyBoyBlue4: And I am always an eager student. Can you come early?

  LadyV76: Yes. So everything is okay with your family?

  MyBoyBlue4: I wouldn’t say things are okay. But Hank and I had a productive chat ea
rlier today, and we’re starting the process of healing. I wish I could tell you things are back to normal, but they’re not. I don’t think they will be for a while, and that’s just the reality of the situation, sucky as it may be. Still, I’m trying. Hank’s trying too. If you’d be willing to sit down with us to work something out, we’d really appreciate it.

  LadyV76: Okay.

  MyBoyBlue4: Wow, I wasn’t expecting you to say that.

  LadyV76: I’m still learning to let perfection go. I think it’ll take me a lifetime to figure that one out. But as much as I wish things were normal, I’m going to work on being okay with complicated.

  MyBoyBlue4: And as someone once told me, complicated can be delicious.

  LadyV76: That someone must be very wise.

  MyBoyBlue4: She is.

  LadyV76: See you tomorrow, Blue.

  MyBoyBlue4: See you then. Sweet dreams, V.

  Chapter Thirty-Six

  Emma

  Lindsey links arms with me as we walk up to Samuel’s front door.

  “I’m proud of you,” she says.

  She’s smiling for the first time in days.

  I smile back. “Thanks. I’m proud of you too.”

  She snorts. “Proud of my train wreck of a life? Thanks.”

  “I mean it.” I nudge her with my elbow. “You got out of bed today, didn’t you? That’s no small feat. We need to celebrate the small things when the big things get overwhelming.”

  “Eh…”

  “Fine. Can we at least celebrate the fact that the gallon of wine you’re about to drink is the best in the world?”

  “That I can get on board with.”

  “See? It’s the small things.”

  Lindsey glances at my stilettos. “Like those shoes?

  “Like these shoes.”

  Truth be told, I didn’t know how I should dress. So I went with what I felt best in: stilettos, jeans, and a bun. Little bit V, little bit me.

  Judging by the way Samuel’s eyes light up when he opens the door, I’d say I got the balance just right.

  The late afternoon sun slices across his face, catching on the ends of his neatly parted hair. He smiles, the skin around his eyes crinkling, and the world goes still at the same moment my heart does.

  He’s sporting the same puffy eyes and dark circles I am. His cheeks are a little sunken, and I wonder how much weight he’s lost over the past few days. I don’t own a scale, but I can tell by the way my clothes fit that I’m definitely down a few pounds. Knowing he hasn’t been able to eat or sleep either makes my chest hurt.

  “Hey, baby.”

  A full-body rush of want moves through me at the deep timbre of his voice. I dig my teeth into my bottom lip. “Hi, Samuel. It’s so good to see you.”

  “You look beautiful.”

  “You look handsome as hell.”

  “I know.”

  I pretend to roll my eyes. “I thought Beau always hosted Sunday supper.”

  “He does, but tonight he and Bel and Maisie made an exception at my request.”

  I nod. “Thanks for having us.”

  “Thanks for coming. Lindsey, it’s great to see you again. My family and I promise to behave better this time. Can I get a mulligan? I’d like to start over with Em’s family. Y’all are just as important to me as my own. Hopefully, you’re a little less nuts, though.”

  “Don’t count on it.” Lindsey’s smile grows. She holds up her arms. “Hi, I’m Lindsey, and I already love you because I can tell how much you adore my sister.”

  Samuel accepts her hug. “I’m Samuel, and I already love you because I’m starting to think you may have talked Emma into giving me a second chance.”

  “How’d you know?” I ask with a grin.

  He lifts a massive shoulder. “Lucky guess. Y’all come in, please. I have a couple of bottles of that drunk nun Albariño with your names on it.”

  “It’s a sign,” Lindsay says, following Samuel inside. “That’s what my next career move should be. I can go from attorney to drunk nun, no problem.”

  The familiar smells of Samuel’s house fill my head—soap, something savory in the oven—and my heart skips a beat.

  I can hear Van Halen playing in the kitchen—“Dance the Night Away” this time.

  Lindsey gawks at Samuel’s house, but I just gawk at Samuel. The way his fingers move as he expertly uncorks a frosty bottle of the Albariño. The easy charm of the questions he asks Lindsey as he hands her a heavy pour. How fucking adorable he looks with a kitchen towel slung over his shoulder and that earnest gleam in his eye.

  He’s learning how to be charming without being full of shit. The transformation is breathtaking to witness.

  “So I’m going to give myself a tour of this insane house,” Lindsey says. “I won’t finish until y’all tell me I’m done, okay?”

  Leaning back against the counter, Samuel smiles and crosses one leg over the other. “Give Em a call if you get lost.”

  “It’s not that big,” I tease.

  “Yes, it is,” he teases right back. “Biggest you’ve ever seen, including all the ones you’ve peeped on the internet.”

  Lindsey wags her eyebrows at me. “Lucky girl.” Then she disappears into the dining room.

  The space between Samuel and me thrums the way it did that first day we met. Only this time, Samuel’s looking at me with soft eyes and a smile.

  “We’re really gonna do this,” I say, throat swelling with emotion.

  He holds up his glass. “If you’ll have me, yes. What changed your mind?”

  “Lindsey was actually a big part of it. We talked for a while last night, and I realized I was trying to build this perfect career. But like the perfect life, it doesn’t exist. The dream is still there. The dream of enjoying my work and earning enough money to live the life I want. But maybe the dream is messy, and maybe it’s never going to look the way I thought it would. I’ll never know everything there is to know about wine or success or money. I’ll never know everything there is to know about myself.” I move across the kitchen to stand in front of him. “One thing I do know? I’ve got a long road ahead of me, and there’s no one I’d rather travel it with than you.”

  He searches my eyes. “I want to be on the road with you, every damn day. And, shamelessly, I really, really want you to be here for John and Celeste’s wedding. I’m already giddy about crushing that event with you. But that still leaves your concerns about your reputation. The staff—aren’t you worried what they’ll think?”

  “I still am. But if we can figure out a way to work together after you basically froze me out, I think we can come up with a plan to move forward in our careers while maintaining the respect of our employees.”

  His lips twitch. “If you think it can be done, then yeah—yeah, it’ll get done.”

  “You have that much faith in me,” I say.

  “You say that as a statement and not a question, and that, baby”—he leans down and nudges his nose against my throat—“is one of the five thousand reasons I love you.”

  I unfurl my fingers into his hair. Give it a tug. He groans. I grin. “I want to be cybering with you until I’m shuffling around using that walker you were talking about.”

  He goes still. “You mean that?”

  “I do. If I can figure it out, I want to cyber with you while I’m shuffling.”

  “Think we can do it one handed? The shuffling?”

  I shrug. “I’m willing to try.”

  His eyes get serious. “Me too. And hey, maybe that’s all we’re gonna need then, and that’s all we need right now. A willingness to try.”

  “I love that idea.” I tilt my chin and kiss his mouth. “I love you.”

  “Would you be willing to try to think about moving in with me?”

  I set down my glass on the counter and slide my hands onto his waist. “I don’t need to think about that. Yes. Yes, I’d love to move in with you, Samuel Beauregard.”

  “Good. ’Cause I’d love
to cook for you every night, Emma Crawford. No more protein bars.”

  I laugh. “No more protein bars.”

  Samuel kisses me, the taste of his mouth and the depth of his desire for me turning me inside out. Just like he did that first time, he holds nothing back. He drinks me in with slow, deep sips that say as plainly as words could that he wants me and only me, and that this is the first kiss of the rest of our lives.

  My hand is halfway down his jeans when a cacophony of voices burst into the kitchen.

  “Emma, are you groping my brother?”

  “Oh yeah, she’s definitely groping him. Mama, get over here, I gotta cover your eyes.”

  “Look how freaking adorable they are together. I hope this means Emma’s decided to stay?”

  That last one is Milly. I turn around, discreetly blocking Samuel’s very obvious erection while I grin at the Beauregard family.

  Everyone’s here: Beau, who’s covering June’s eyes, and Annabel and Maisie. Rhett, Milly, and yes, Hank too. His smile is more subdued than usual, and his eyes are a little red. But he is smiling. And that’s something.

  That’s a start.

  A willingness to try.

  “I’m staying,” I say, and I’m immediately wrapped into four tight hugs. Five if you count Maisie’s tap on my cheek. My sister magically appears and hugs me too before refilling her wineglass.

  Samuel also gets a hug from everyone but Hank. He hangs back, busying himself with the grocery bags June brought over.

  “I’m so glad,” Beau says, meeting my eyes. “And so sorry, Emma. You know I told Samuel not to lay a finger on you.”

  “Well.” I glance up at Samuel. “I was the one who laid a finger on him first, so…”

  “So yeah, she started it,” Samuel says, still smiling. I can tell by the way his expression softens that he wants to kiss me, but he’s holding back. For Hank, I realize. He’s fine being with me while Hank is around, but it’d be pretty cruel to rub it in his face with PDA.

  My heart is so swollen and so full I’m worried it’ll burst. There’s a lot of hurt in this room. But there’s also a lot of love. And I’d like to think at the end of the day, love wins.