“Karla …”
“Don’t worry, Mom. I’m still going to Columbia. I’ll still live the life you want me to.”
“Karla, I …”
“No, Mom. Not now. I love you. I promise, we will talk next week.” Then I hung up as an ugly sob erupted from deep in my throat. It really was over, Jake and me. It sunk in like a heavy rock dropped into a small pond.
We were done. Never again would he hold me. Never again would I feel his lips on mine. It was all over.
Chapter Fourteen
Karla
Somehow, life continued. Winter break was long and lonely. Christmas seemed sad. Jake had left for his vocational school. Or, at least that was what he had told his mom. But he could be anywhere.
I know it tore Aunt Kim apart to have him gone at Christmas. Several times, I caught her staring at his empty chair.
January was cold and lonely. February wasn’t much better. But by then, the numbness had started to fade. The pain was still there, but now I just felt it more.
March and April were a blur as I got ready for graduation. I was accepted at Columbia for the following fall. But it felt like a hollow victory.
May was worse. Jake was back in town. He was still staying in E.J.s back room, but Parker said he’d start working for the power company in June.
I tried to keep some control on my racing heart as I desperately hoped he would come home. I so wanted to see him again. But my hopes were dashed when I learned he had visited his mom. Choosing a time when he knew I was in school.
Jake Benson didn’t want to see me. It couldn’t be made plainer.
Once again I fell into a deep depression that didn’t even lift for graduation. Mom flew all the way from Mali to attend. Aunt Kim and both Parker and Buck were there. But no Jake.
I held back a tear. Something I had become very good at and made it through the ceremony.
And then it was over. Everything. My stay in Everton Washington. My time with the Benson family. My friendship with Beth and Cindy. All of it cut short as if it had never happened. Tearful goodbyes and quick hugs signaled the end of my old life and beginning of a new one.
As Aunt Kim drove me to the airport on a hot August day, I couldn’t stop myself from twisting around to see if he was there, behind me somehow, watching me leave.
But there was nothing behind us. No Jake asking me to stay.
.o0o.
Jake
Life sucks, then you die. That was my new saying to myself. My way of trying to make things better.
Walking away from Karla had killed me a thousand different ways. But it was knowing that I had no choice that really hurt. She deserved better and I could never give it to her. It filled me with an anger. Just like when my dad died.
I couldn’t fix it. I couldn’t make it better and it ate at my gut.
But it was the only way.
Lineman school hadn’t helped liked I hoped. I thought being away might make things easier, of course, they didn’t. Nothing ever would.
When I came back from school and stopped to see my mom, I made sure Karla wasn’t there. No way I could see her again.
On her graduation, I hung back in the corner of the gym as I watched my former classmates walk across the stage and get their diplomas. But really, it didn’t mean that much to me. All I could think about was the girl with long blond hair and a smile that made life worth living.
The day she left town I was up a telephone pole stringing wire. But I swear, my soul knew the moment she left town. I wondered if it would always be this way. A life filled with emptiness.
.o0o.
Karla
They say it takes a year to get over a lost love. I am here to tell you they lied. A year later I was still torn up inside.
Don’t get me wrong. I was moving on with my life. Columbia was great and I fit in just fine. It had better be. I had sacrificed too much for it not to be great.
Classes were challenging without being too over the top. My father had agreed to let me rent an apartment with two other girls from school. Since he was paying the bills, I sort of needed his approval.
Emily and Hanna were just like me. Freshman with wealthy fathers who could afford New York rents. Unlike me, neither of them were suffering from a broken heart. I know they thought of me as a damaged wallflower. A social misfit who didn’t understand that the purpose of college was to have fun.
When we first moved in together they tried everything to get me into college life. Emily was a little wild and had a dozen guys following her around like lost puppies. Hanna, was just as popular and offered to set me up with any of several boys.
But all I could do was decline. The idea of seeing someone else just felt wrong. That didn’t stop them from trying.
“You need to have a fling,” Emily said with a sour expression as she stood in my bedroom doorway and glared at me. “No guy is worth this much suffering.” It was Friday, date night. Both of them were dressed to the Nth degree.
Just like every Friday since we moved in, they were trying to get me to tag along.
Hanna laughed as she looked over Emily’s shoulder. “Don’t worry. We’ll find you someone. There are a ton of good looking men, each going places. Everything from future stockbrokers, lawyers, doctors, you can have your pick.”
My insides tightened into a rock. No. I wasn’t ready. I smiled sadly and gently declined.
They rolled their eyes at me and left me alone to suffer in silence. Perhaps they were right, I thought. Maybe I should start to move on from Jake. After all. He was on the other side of the country. And knowing the girls in that town. He wasn’t lacking for female attention.
No, maybe it was time. But I knew deep in my soul that I wasn’t ready to move on.
The doorbell told me that Emily’s and Hanna’s dates were here. I was tempted to go out and see who the girls had chosen for this week.
“Karla, can you come here a moment,” Hanna called from the living room.
I sighed heavily. She was going to tell me that someone had a friend who knew a guy. And could I help them out by coming with them?
“Hanna, I said I didn’t want to…”
My heart slammed to a halt. Jake Benson stood there in the door looking like God’s gift to women everywhere. Tall, broad shoulders. Leather jacket, hair needing to be cut.”
I froze.
Both Emily and Hanna looked from Jake to me then back to Jake.
“Hi, Karla,” he said with a small smile. My heart melted.
“What are you doing here?” I asked.
He didn’t answer, instead, he just stared into my eyes as if he wanted desperately to know something important.
“Hi, I’m Hanna,” she said as she held out her hand. “And you are?”
Jake smirked and said as he nodded towards me. “I’m the idiot who let her get away.”
Emily scowled at me, “This is the guy. The guy you’ve been moping about?”
All I could do was nod as I continued to stare at Jake. He was here. Why? A hope deep inside of me threatened to grow. But I knew if it did, I would be hurt again.
Emily looked at Jake, raised an eyebrow, and slowly nodded. “Now it makes sense.”
I ignored her. “Why are you here?” I asked him again.
Jake shrugged his shoulders. “The woman I love lives in New York. I figured that was where I should go.”
“But your job?”
He laughed. “Karla, I’m an electrician. I can get a job anywhere. Besides, I hear they’ve got a great music scene down in the village. Maybe I can sit in on some sessions. Pick up a few gigs on the weekends.
Emily stared, “You play the guitar?” she asked.
“And he rides a motorcycle,” I added.
Emily’s mouth dropped open. “That isn’t fair. No wonder you’ve been such a mess.”
Hanna poked her in the ribs to shut her up before she could embarrass me even more.
It didn’t matter though. All I could think a
bout was Jake standing there, telling me he loved me and he wanted to move to New York for me.
“Really?” I asked, unable to believe it. My heart swelled with happiness and hope.
“One condition,” he said as he stepped into the apartment and pulled me into a deep hug. “We tell everyone and their brother. I’m tired of secrets.”
I melted into him, soaking up that specialness that is Jake Benson. Not only had my dreams come true. But I got to tell the world. Jake Benson loved me as much as I loved him.
Epilogue
Karla
I was preparing a vegetable tray for the party when Emily stepped up next to me and gave me a curious glance.
“So, two years, dating the same guy,” she began. “Do you get worried. I mean, he won’t have a college degree …”
I stopped cutting and turned to her, “Really Emily? The guy has a good paying job, he picks up extra money doing gigs on the weekends. Besides, this is Jake Benson, can you really picture him going into the office each day with a breafcase. He’d go crazy. And that’s not the man I fell in love with.”
“But …”
“No but,” I said as I picked up the tray. “Besides. The man makes my toes curl.”
She laughed and followed me into the living room where our guests were gathered for what they thought was a Sunday afternoon football party.
After I deposited the tray of food, I wrapped my arm around Jake’s waist and melted into him. It was always like this. Even in a crowd of people, it was just the two of us. Tied together with an invisible force.
He smiled down at me and raised an eyebrow. “Do you want the honors?”
I shook my head, suddenly unabe to speak.
My boyfriend took a deep breath then called out. “Hey guys, listen up.”
Our friends all turned towards us. Hanna used the remote to turn down the TV.
Jake smiled at me then said, “Just to let you all know. Karla and I are engaged.” The room erupted in congratulations, hugs, and happiness.
As a dozen emotions washed over me, all I could do was hang on to the man I loved. It would always be like this I realized. We might be surrounded by friends and family. But at its core, it was Jake and I against the world. Together. Always together.
The End
Author’s Notes
Thank you for reading ‘Our Secret.’ The first book in the “Benson Brother’s series” Parker’s story in “Hidden Truth” will be out soon.
I would love to know what you think of it. My readers make it possible for me to do what I love so I am always grateful and excited to hear from you. Please stop by my website GLSnodgrass.com or send me an Email at [email protected]. Feel free to sign up for my newsletter. I use my newsletter to announce new releases and give away free books. I also post on my Facebook page. https://www.facebook.com/G.L.Snodgrass/
As always, I would like to thank my friends for their assistance with this book. Sheryl Turner, Anya Monroe, Eryn Carpenter, and Kim Loraine. I couldn’t have done it without them.
If you enjoyed ‘Our Secret” please tell a friend or two. And please help out by rating this book at Amazon, Bookbub, or Goodreads. Reviews from readers make a huge difference for a writer.
Again, thank you.
Our Secret (The Benson Brothers Book 1) Page 9
