Xo, Zach

by Kendall Ryan

  He laughed and took another sip of his beer. “Listen, you caught me off guard. I didn’t expect to have to impress my ‘brand-new girlfriend’ when I came out tonight.”

  “That’s fair. Thanks for being a good sport and playing along.”

  Zach took a sip of his beer. “That’s what I’m here for. No, really. I’m actually here to inconspicuously keep an eye on my buddy’s little brother. He was the dumbass shot-gunning a beer inside.”

  I nodded. “So, you’re babysitting.”

  “Pretty much.”

  “Do we need to go back inside then?” I asked, hoping not because I much preferred the quiet out here to the party inside and the surprising comfort that was developing between me and this virtual stranger, even though we’d only been out here a short time.

  Zach shook his head. “Josh is a good kid. He’ll have a massive hangover tomorrow, but he won’t do anything stupid. And I already snatched his car keys when I got here.” He patted his jeans pocket and I silently begged myself not to look at his crotch. Don’t do it. Don’t you dare fucking do it, Poppy.

  “Plus, I think my presence alone is enough to deter him from any further bad behavior,” he added, drawing my gaze back up to his.

  Zach wasn’t exactly imposing, but he was tall and muscular, so if he needed to, he could certainly put another man in his place.

  “So, tell me, are there things I should know about my new date … hobbies? Interests? Strange fetishes?”

  I smiled. “Fetishes are really more of a second date topic. As for hobbies …” I shrugged. “Reading books. Attempting to write them.”

  Zach returned my easy smile. It was crazy how natural our conversation felt. “Please don’t tell me you write those horrible vampire romances.”

  “So judgy.” I shook my head, frowning in mock disgust. “I may have. In high school. And if you tell anyone that—I’ll hunt you down and kill you.”

  This earned me a laugh out of him, and I immediately decided I liked the sound way too much. “Okay. I can’t fault you there. I wrote some pretty awful sci-fi back then.”

  Our shared interest of writing was intriguing, and while I was sure we could have talked about it easily for another hour, Zach changed the subject, and we bounced from topic to topic, finding more things in common as we did.

  “I’m making an assumption here, but since you are at this party I’m assuming you’re a student at Vanderburg, right?”

  I nodded.

  “What are you studying?”

  Before I could answer, Jason and his girlfriend walked into the backyard.

  “That’s them,” I hissed at Zach. I wasn’t sure what to do. Just act casual? Or should I grab Zach’s hand? Suddenly, this whole idea seemed a tad dramatic. But Zach had his own idea. Just as my pencil-dick ex was about to look our way, Zach turned my face toward his. His warm palm rested on my cheek and I stared up at him helplessly.

  In the span of a moment, I knew his lips were about to descend on mine, and my ovaries did a little happy dance. Suddenly coming to this stupid party seemed like the best idea ever.

  And when he leaned down and pressed his lips to mine? Every thought left my brain, including Jason, his new girlfriend, and the mountain of responsibility in my life. I was totally blinded by the rush of desire that surged through my body, settling deep inside my core. His lips were full and soft, and when he nibbled against my lower lip, I put my arms around his neck just to keep my legs from giving out. Holy fuck! The man could kiss.

  My lips parted in silent invitation and Zach responded, making a tiny grunt of approval before his tongue slid against mine. My body throbbed from the top of my head, through my nipples, which were now two hard pinpricks beneath my shirt, and even farther down, between my legs. His strong hands landed on my hips and pulled me in closer and I had to stop myself from moaning.

  I could feel his hard, muscular body through his shirt as I pressed against him, sliding a hand down his chest to his stomach, lightly running my fingers over his six pack. Our bodies were touching in all the right places and I swear I could feel a bulge there…a bulge that I wasn’t sure I was the cause of, or if this was his ‘normal’ state. I wasn’t sure but in that moment, I wanted to find out—with or without Jason and his bimbo watching. The lady balls were growing larger with every pant and moan of our kiss.

  It was all I could do to keep from reaching down into his pants right then and there. The desire to pet his one-eyed python was a sharp pulse of need. I was so not normally like this…this wanton woman willing to throw caution to the wind and grope and pull at anything with an XY chromosome. I was a serious graduate student who read two hundred books a year and didn’t even own a vibrator. I didn’t go all weak over a man. Ever.

  But this guy? It was like his presence had set up shop in my womb, and my lady parts were ready to roll out the welcome-wagon for him.

  I could have stayed like that forever, drunk on him and hanging on for dear life, but moments later, the kiss ended, and I felt like I’d just been slapped in the face.

  We looked at each other, breathing heavily. It was like he was the only person in the world who existed in this moment. Then I blinked, and it felt like someone turned the party back on because I was suddenly remembering where we are and why we were here. I didn’t even check to see if Jason was still around. It seemed stupid that I ever cared. That was the best kiss of my entire life, and it was with a complete stranger.

  “Shit, that was…” he started, his voice deeper, slightly breathless.

  “Yeah,” I added, dumbly, touching a finger to my trembling, and still-damp lips.

  When I did finally have my wits about me enough to look, I noticed that Jason and his new girlfriend were conspicuously absent.

  Before either of us could say anything else, we were interrupted by Jodee.

  “There you are. I’ve been looking for you.”

  I turned in her direction, my hand falling away from my mouth.

  “You were right, this party is lame. I’m going to head out soon,” she said, glancing at Zach and I could tell she was dying to hear what I was doing out here with this man.

  I looked back at Zach. “Um, thanks,” I stammered, not sure what else to say. This guy was like an orgasm on two legs, and I was having a hard time keeping my cool.

  “We’re breaking up already?” He grinned, and just as I was getting the feeling back in my legs, I melted again.

  I smiled back. “Looks like it.”

  “I should at least take you out on a proper date some time.” That sexy, deep voice, nearly took my breath away. Every part of my body was screaming yes, especially my lower half, but I forced myself to keep calm and collected.

  “I don’t know if that’s a good idea…” I saved him the lecture about how I just got out of a relationship, and how I wanted to buckle down and focus on my writing, and all the rest of it … and just left it at that. He had to know that the make-believe role I’d asked him to portray tonight was explanation enough that a relationship—hell, even a date—was something I was avoiding like the plague.

  “Can I at least get your number?” He smiled, and I pictured leading him into my bedroom and ripping his clothes off. Bad, Poppy. I shook my head, trying to get ahold of myself. What is wrong with me? I just met this guy and I already can’t stop thinking about fucking him. And, sure, he’s sweet, funny and basically a human aphrodisiac, but I needed to relax. Jason really did mess with my head, if this was how I was acting. You’ve sworn off men, remember? So even though the last thing I want to do is walk away from the sexiest guy I’ve ever met, I forced myself to say, “Sorry, I’m not really looking for anything romantic right now.”

  He nodded. “I understand.”

  I thought I detected a hint of disappointment in his voice.

  I started to walk away, then turned back. I was caught off guard all over again at the sight of his arresting green eyes and sensuous lips, but I put
on a smile. “Who knows, if it’s meant to be, maybe we’ll meet again.”

  Zach smiled, and nodded once like he believed me.

  As I walked out of the party I could feel his gaze smoldering through me and even though it was a warm night, I shivered. I might have sworn off men, but I was pretty sure Zach would be creeping into my fantasies later that night. My stupid ovaries were clapping their hands and dancing like Ellen had just given us a brand-new car.

  I didn’t know if we’d ever see each other again, but I did know one thing—I’d never felt anything like that kiss before in my entire life and was almost certain I never would again. But the tightening feeling in my chest, and the realization that lightning didn’t often strike twice—well, I’d just have to find a way to push those from my brain, because I really didn’t have room for another man in my life. Connor was enough. Wasn’t he?

  Chapter Three

  Zach

  The morning sun did nothing to erase my impure thoughts of Poppy. The entire drive to campus that morning I couldn’t stop my mind from replaying thoughts of meeting her at the party over the weekend. The way she’d taken charge, practically telling me I was going to be her pretend boyfriend, rather than asking if I could. It had been rather cute, and now, even without hardly knowing anything about her, I was somehow already smitten by the mysterious girl with her dark hair and serious eyes.

  I'd hardly recovered from my last relationship and now here I was pining over someone who I'd probably never see again. This was a university of ten-thousand students. We never got around to discussing her program of study before I catapulted myself headfirst into lust with that kiss. The odds were not in our favor. And, yeah, she was a student, so I probably shouldn’t have used her as spank-bank material all weekend, but I had.

  Fucking sue me.

  She was gorgeous. Petite and nervous and lovely. Men had written sonnets about women less striking.

  I spent the whole weekend trying to write with a head full of her, and a serious hard on.

  But today was the first day of classes, which meant my morning would be occupied by meetings with each of the new graduate students, so there would be little time for impure thoughts. Back to business, as it were.

  When I got to my office, I immediately closed the door, as if someone would see it in my eyes that my mind was on anything but my morning meetings.

  Fucking pull it together, Zach.

  Apparently, my mom had been right. But it wasn’t my aura that was out of whack, it was an appendage much farther south. Too bad there was no time to beat it into shape. No pun intended. I’d never had a single kiss fuck with my head so badly before.

  And I wasn’t sure what I expected from Poppy when she approached, but from the first moment she opened her mouth and spoke, I knew she was different.

  Her voice wasn't high-pitched or girly, even though her frame was petite and delicate. Instead, her tone was deeper than I expected, almost raspy and seductive. I liked it immediately. I could have listened to her talk for hours — listened to her recite Tolstoy, or the fucking alphabet, for that matter. I just wanted to be near her.

  I hadn't wanted to go out that night at all—especially not to some ridiculous keg-party where I was babysitting my friend's kid brother—but everything changed the moment Poppy walked up to me with her interesting proposal. And of course, I was all too happy to play along.

  She was easy to talk to—we chatted about wide ranging topics from Darwinism to our favorite authors, both agreeing that the concept of having an actual favorite book was the most absurd idea we'd ever heard. Her eyes lit up when she spoke, her lips twitching when she got excited—she was mesmerizing.

  A smile played on my own lips, remembering how she admitted that she liked to write young adult vampire romance, and then threatened me within an inch of my life if I ever told anyone that. I’d felt inspired enough to admit my early, atrocious attempts at writing bad sci-fi when I was still in high school. Poppy had laughed, her eyes sparkling on mine.

  A knock on the door interrupted my memory. I glanced at my watch—8:50. Shit. I wasn’t sure if I was impressed or annoyed at the early arrival. I could’ve used that extra ten minutes to prepare for the meeting, or at the very least, take a mental cold shower by going over my plans for the day. I reached for the stack of papers that was already accumulating on my desk—who was this student again? A poet in the master’s program that I’d be advising. I hadn’t even taken the time to review the file. Whatever. It’d be fine. I stepped out from behind my desk and swung the door open.

  “Good morning …” my words died on my lips.

  It was Poppy.

  Heat prickled down my spine—a mix between lust and fear. I wanted her, yes. But could I really remain objective and professional working alongside her? Did I even want to try?

  Her honey brown eyes locked with mine the same way they had at the party, but this time, instead of watching them flicker in interest, I saw them widen with surprise. The color drained from her cheeks as I let myself give her a quick once-over—she was dressed more casually than she’d been on Friday night in a pair of jeans and a t-shirt, and she wore a hint of pink lip-gloss that I couldn’t help but imagine smeared all over my cock.

  Jesus, Zach. There goes my mental cold shower right out the window.

  “Poppy.” Her name on my lips was a soft murmur. I cleared my throat to start again. “You said we’d met again.” If it was meant to be … I didn’t add that last part, as I was pretty sure those words were coming back to bite her in the ass.

  She blinked at me, the apples of her cheeks now a pretty shade that nearly matched her lips. And those lips… Christ. They were now parted as she drew a slow, shaky inhale.

  “Come inside?”

  She stood rooted in place. “This has to be some mistake.”

  “Poppy Ellis, poetry grad student,” I read aloud from the folder I realized was still in my hands. “Welcome to the program. I’ll be your adviser.”

  Swallowing a lump in her throat, Poppy gave a slow, solemn nod and followed me through the office door.

  “Have a seat.”

  She obeyed, hesitantly lowering herself into the chair in front of my desk while I took the one behind it. “’I’m sorry, but there’s got to be someone else I can work with.” Her eyes darted around my office, refusing to settle back on me. I waited patiently until they locked with mine again. Electric. She immediately looked back down at her hands.

  She was perfection. Those soft waves of hair and honey-colored eyes. I wanted to drink her in. Instead, I focused on doing something useful—rolling up the sleeves of my dress shirt—since the room had suddenly become about ten degrees too warm.

  I couldn’t help but notice the way her eyes clung to my forearms, or the ink that decorated them. Various quotes, short poems I’d written, my favorite philosophers’ prose scrawled in Latin. My tattoos were very personal to me that way, and suddenly I was regretting exposing so much of myself. I was the kind of man who needed to touch something in order to understand it, but rather than running my fingertips over the words, letting them ground me, I wanted to touch the young woman seated before me in a desperate attempt to understand her.

  Of course, physical contact with students was not on the agenda, so I did the next best thing in an attempt to make myself useful. I thumbed through her file. She had already won several awards for her poetry, and a few of her pieces had been picked up by some prominent literary magazines. In that instant I knew it had to be me—the other advisor for her program hated poetry and he was a grade-A asshole. I tried to tell myself it had nothing to do with feeling possessive over her—though the idea of someone else mentoring her made me want to put my fist through a wall.

  Decision made, I composed myself. “You’re a pretty impressive poet, Poppy, and I’m the most published poetry advisor on staff.” I let her file fall closed as I met her gaze again. “Seems like you and I are a perfect fit.”
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  She tucked her hair behind her ear and shook her head. “I just don’t know. I mean, how are we supposed to work together after I practically begged you to be my fake boyfriend for a night, and then, well, you know.”

  No way was she going to get away with not saying it out loud.

  “Know what?”

  She rolled her eyes. “The kiss, Zach.”

  “It was a kiss,” I said, totally downplaying how I felt about said kiss. I could write an entire novel about that kiss. “And it’s not like it took much convincing to play along to make your ex jealous. You’re gorgeous, Poppy. But still, it was just a kiss. I’m not going to let it get in the way of us working together.”

  She closed her eyes for a second and took a deep breath. “Alright,” she said. “I guess we can give it a shot.”

  This time, when I stuck out my hand, she shook it. I pretended not to feel goose bumps racing up my arm.

  “Well, now that that’s settled, could I convince you to take this discussion somewhere I can grab a cup of coffee? The cup I had earlier isn’t cutting it today.”

  Poppy had already grabbed her purse before I could even finish my sentence. “I’m dying for coffee,” she admitted. “I can’t stand Mondays and I might go postal if I don’t get some caffeine in my system.”

  “Coffee it is,” I said, escorting her from my office. We settled on a coffee shop just a short walk away on campus.

  “Drink’s on me,” I said, motioning for her to grab a seat.

  “You don’t have to do that.”

  I shrugged. “Consider it a welcome to the program. What would you like?”

  She furrowed her brow but didn’t fight me on it. “Just coffee please. Black.”

  I ordered us each a large mug of coffee and stuffed a ten-dollar tip in the jar for good karma. Poppy had already settled in at a small table in the far back of the shop. I joined her, sliding her mug across the table. “Is this big enough to get you through a Monday?”

  She smiled. “Maybe after the second or third refill. Thanks.”