Skeleton Key

by Piers Anthony

  Then the rest of their reality closed in on her. She had to kill her best friend? And her beloved was going to destroy her? She began to scream.

  The chamber dissolved into cloud vapor. Beyond it the castle puffed similarly into formlessness. The floor gave way, and they fell out of the sky.

  Squid continued screaming as they dropped toward the land below.

  Chapter 11

  Search

  Then she was back in her cabin on Fibot, still screaming. In two and a quarter moments the others were there.

  “Squid!” Santo said. “What’s the matter?”

  The change in scenario did it. She halted screaming and gazed around, gradually reorienting.

  They were all there, watching her with concern. “I had a—a hallucination that we saw the future, and—”

  Then she focused on Win. “Oh!” She burst into tears.

  “I don’t usually have that effect on you,” Win said, surprised.

  “In my dream I had to—to kill you,” Squid said. “Or the universe would end.”

  The others laughed. “Sister, that must have been some bad dream,” Firenze said.

  “Fortunately bad dreams are only animate fears,” Santo said. “No need to take them seriously.”

  Larry shook his head. “This one is serious. I was along. So were Tata and the peeve.”

  Santo glanced at the robot dogfish. “What’s your take on this?”

  The screen flashed. “It is a true prophecy,” the peeve said. “Squid suffered a vision of the future. If she doesn’t kill Win, the universe will end.”

  “I can’t kill Win!” Squid said, horrified anew. “I never want to ever even try to hurt her.” She was so upset she was starting to lose her shape, her arms dissolving into what others called tentacles. She focused and restored the arms.

  “It doesn’t make sense,” Win said. “We’ve been friends for half of forever. We never even quarrel.”

  “Yes!” Squid agreed. They hugged each other.

  Santo pondered briefly. “Then we shall have to consider alternatives, and implement them before that future arrives. Fortunately the future is malleable.”

  Trust him to have the practical approach. Of course they didn’t have to wait on the dread future. They could do something in the interim to change it. To unhappen its horror before it manifested.

  Squid ran to Santo and kissed him. So did Win. He kissed them back. It had nothing to do with Win being windy or Squid being alien or his being gay. They were siblings. They would never, ever, play each other false.

  Then Santo faced the others. “We have clear warning, from Squid’s hallucination, which not only confirms that she is the most important one of us, but that the fate of the universe does depend on her. I know this is not anything she sought, but it was thrust upon her, and the rest of us should support her in any way we can.”

  He paused, in case there was objection. There was none. Santo was the smartest of them, as well as being a virtual Magician in his own right, and they were generally glad to let him do the heavy thinking.

  “If we follow our present course, Squid will be required to kill Win, perhaps because of a Demon wager whose penalty for failure will be to end the universe. This forced choice is unacceptable. Therefore we will change our course, trusting that this will put us on a route that avoids any such sacrifice. I believe we need to take a random course, so that our destination can’t be predicted. Ultimately we want to bring Fibot to Caprice Castle by surprise, so that Piton and Data can operate it and make it move back into Xanth proper, before the enemy Demon realizes what is happening. The question is how to travel randomly, before we find a route there. Any suggestions?”

  “Yes,” Ion said from his floating carpet. “Hilda and I have done some traveling, and have some experience in random routing. I suggest that each of us devise an interim destination, which you, Santo, can then tunnel us to. Each can write his or her idea on a piece of paper, and the dozen papers can be mixed up and you can draw one at random, not knowing what it is until you read it. It could be anywhere. Then we all go there and act like regular tourists, appreciating the world we discover. From there, we can try again for Caprice Castle, using a similar ploy. There will be no predicting our route.”

  Santo nodded. “I like it.” He looked about. “Comments?”

  “I’ll fetch papers and pencils,” Ula said. Her talent was being useful in unexpected ways, so this was routine for her. Firenze smiled, appreciating it; he loved her regardless. Her main usefulness now was keeping him under control, and that was fulfilling her as well as him, but she was not limited to that.

  They adjourned to the main room, where they sat around the central table and scribbled their ideas. Squid pondered briefly, then wrote “The honey side of the Moon.” The thing about the moon was that the side that faced Mundania had long since frozen into a rictus of horror at the awful sights it saw there, and the once pungent cheese had turned sickly green. No one with any sense wanted to be in Mundania, it was not just a matter of its lack of magic. But the side facing away from Mundania remained fresh with milk and honey and was a pleasant place where newlywed couples liked to visit.

  Beside her Larry was drawing a picture. She suspected it was of the portal, where he had become Laurelai and been supremely happy for several hours. She understood his longing, and hoped that some day he would be able to make the change permanent. But she doubted anyone else would want to go there.

  And what of herself? She could assume many forms, but always female. Yet, for the sake of making Larry happy as Laurelai, could she enjoy passing though the portal again and being male? She thought she might. The folk of Portal Village had learned to get along in opposite genders, so obviously it could be done if other factors aligned.

  In due course they all finished, folded their papers, and tossed them into the central basket.

  Santo picked up the basket and handed it to Noe, beside him. “Wake shell,” he said.

  She smiled, and shook the basket well so that the papers were thoroughly shuffled. She gave it back to Santo.

  He closed his eyes and reached in. He caught a paper. He unfolded it and read it. “The World of Talent, one of Ida’s Moons, where folk go to win a talent. But it’s hard to find that world, or to win a talent when there.” He looked up. “We have our destination. Whose idea is this?”

  Data raised her hand. “Mine. Ever since I couldn’t fit the magic panty, I’ve wanted a magic talent of my own. Maybe on that world I could find it.”

  “You will have your chance,” Santo said. “I hope you win a good one.”

  “Oh, yes!”

  “Now do you want to go alone, or with a companion?”

  She was surprised by the thought. “Go alone? I couldn’t. I’ve never been alone. With a companion.”

  “Who I think should also be chosen by random selection.” Santo closed his eyes and reached into the basket again. He drew out a paper, opened it, and read it. “The Honey side of the moon. Who wrote this?”

  “I did,” Squid said, surprised.

  “Then you will be Data’s companion.”

  Squid considered protesting, but realized that the randomness had selected her and she needed to oblige it. Maybe it was because she was the protagonist, and was supposed to be in on the action, or at least observing it. “I will,” she agreed.

  Santo glanced at Tata. “You have the coordinates of that world, of course?”

  The robot’s screen flashed. “Yes, of course,” the peeve said.

  “I will need to study them, to orient accurately on that world, as it is new to me.”

  Tata buzzed. A ribbon of paper emerged from his mouth, printed out coordinates. Santo reached down and tore it off. “Thank you.”

  “When do we go?” Data asked eagerly.

  Santo smiled. “One more random decisi
on. Timing may be important. Let each of us write a number, any number, and I will draw one and reduce it to a single digit. That will determine the number of hours hence we will make that trip.”

  That seemed appropriate. They all wrote numbers and tossed them into the basket. Squid wrote 1,000,001, curious how Santo would process it.

  The papers were shuffled again, and one drawn. “The number is 666,” Santo said. “We add those together and get 18. Then we add those, and get 9. We will depart, in nine hours from now.”

  So Squid’s number would have condensed to 2. She was satisfied with the longer wait.

  Back in their cabin, Squid turned to Larry. “Would you—?”

  He put his arms around her. She had the comfort of knowing that if they managed to change the future with respect to Win, it should also change with respect to Larry. They lay together on the bed and slept.

  There was a knock on the door. It was Data. “It’s time.”

  So it was. Nine hours, just like that. Squid went with Data to the main chamber. The others were there. “We will tunnel there now,” Noe said. “Then anchor in private air, cloaked to be invisible. The two of you will be on your own. But if there is trouble, strike your match and we will come to you quickly.”

  Squid nodded. “I hope we don’t need to.”

  “When you find what you seek, then strike the match.”

  “Yes.”

  “Go topside. We are about to tunnel. Santo is already focusing.”

  Which was why Noe was doing the talking. Small local tunnels were easy, but interplanetary tunnels took a lot out of Santo. Which was also why the boat would anchor for a while, to give him time to recover, while she took care of him. The two might never be a romantic couple, but they plainly needed each other.

  They climbed to the topside. Win was at the helm, with Firenze at the fire sail, Ula beside him.

  And there ahead appeared the tunnel, big enough for Fibot to sail through. It looked to be only a ring, but beyond it was a completely different world. The World of Talent. It was in shades of gray.

  The wind accelerated, catching the sail, which brightened into a round sheet of flame. The craft moved forward, through the ring, and suddenly they were in the gray world. Squid knew they had actually traveled light years, jumping from Xanth to Talent. Santo did not show off his talent, he just used it when required, but it was as powerful as that of any other Magician.

  That triggered another meander of thought. When Santo was grown, he would have a man as his romantic partner. Squid wondered whom that would be. The siblings would remain close to him, regardless.

  The boat cruised to a landing on a gray sand dune. The wind died out. “Bye,” Win said.

  Larry hugged Squid one more time, and let her go. “Take care of yourself,” he said tensely.

  Then Squid and Data climbed over the gunwale and landed on the dune. They were on their way.

  Squid glanced back. The boat was gone. She knew it remained close; it was that it was invisible, now that they were off it. But it would soon find a better anchoring place.

  She heard voices, and realized that others aboard the boat were talking about her. Which was to be expected. She tuned it down to a background babbling and ignored it.

  “Well, it’s just you and me now,” Data said.

  Squid felt doubt. She hardly knew this girl. “Maybe we should have let you pick your own partner. You and I have not been close.”

  “No, I think random is better, considering the importance of our mission. I confess to being a bit jealous of you and your boyfriend, even if he’s not really into being male. I could take care of that pronto, if I got him alone five minutes. I’m jealous of Firenze and Ula too, and even of my brother Piton and Myst. She’s only nine, and he thinks he doesn’t take her seriously, but she’s got that panty. That gives her control, and it’s not just a matter of freaking him out. She can take him anywhere she wants to go, and she’ll be getting ideas soon enough. I’ve already got the ideas; I want a boy of my own.”

  “Maybe you’ll find one here.”

  “More likely I’ll find one on Skeleton Key, when this is over. If I brought him to Caprice Castle, he’d be able to assume fleshly form while there.” Data smiled. “The flesh has some things that skeletons don’t. Things I could play with.”

  Squid found herself blushing. “Uh—”

  “Like ears and lips. Good for kissing.”

  “Oh.”

  “I’m teasing. But I do want to play with the other, too. Why should my brother have all the fun?”

  Squid realized that this girl was indeed a tease. She liked pushing the Conspiracy limits. And why not? She was on the verge of nubility, anticipating the crossover. Squid had been seriously tempted with Larry, especially when she got aged three years, and with Ruby, when Squid was male. “Why, indeed,” she agreed.

  “But mainly I miss my parents. They were good ones, and I want them back.”

  Safer ground, perhaps. “I know how it is.”

  “You do?”

  “I lost mine in future Xanth. All five original siblings did. Now we have other families, and they are great, but it’s not the same.”

  “You have other parents?”

  “I was adopted by Kandy and Ease. She can change into a board when she wants to, and he uses her to bash monsters. They both enjoy it. But there are ways in which I feel closer to Aunt Astrid, the basilisk, and to Aunt Fornax.”

  “The basilisk! And Fornax! The evil Demon?”

  Squid smiled. “She’s a Demoness, but she’s not evil. We all love her, and Astrid.”

  Data nodded. “I guess you do understand about losing your family.”

  “Oh, yes.”

  “I knew you five siblings were close, but I guess I didn’t really understand why. You all lost your families in the same disaster. You truly understand each other, emotionally.”

  “We do.”

  “I thought having a skeleton daddy and a flesh princess mommy was really unusual. But they’re a normal couple compared to what you siblings have.”

  “And we do want to rescue them,” Squid said. “Once we figure out how.”

  “Yes. So let’s be on our way.” Then Data paused. “Except I have no idea where to go now. I didn’t think that far ahead.”

  “Maybe my skeleton key will help.” Squid reached into her hair and drew the key out.

  Data stared. “I thought your hair was fake!”

  “It is. But I can keep things in it.”

  “Such as a key you got in a hallucination?”

  Squid nodded. “That does seem odd. The dream expired, but the key didn’t. I didn’t realize how weird that was until now.”

  “Someone must have wanted you to have it.”

  “I guess so.” Indeed, this could be more of Fornax’s quiet involvement, making a dream key become real when the dream ended. It was not the only gift the Demoness had quietly given her.

  Squid held the key up. “Now I just need to figure out how to use it.”

  “No problem. I know about skeleton things. Just ask it.”

  Could it be that simple? “Skeleton Key, where should we go?”

  The key twitched in her hand, surprising her, but that was all.

  “Well, you have to give it something to orient on,” Data said. “Such as ‘Where is there a useful talent?’”

  “Where is there a useful talent?” Squid asked it.

  Now the key jerked in a specific direction, pointing.

  “On our way,” Data said, stepping forth in that direction.

  There turned out to be a gray path there. They followed it. Soon they came to an alcove with a pedestal. On the pedestal was a statue of the head of a bald man.

  “This is a talent?” Squid asked.

  “There’s a plaque. TALENT: G
ROWING INSTANT FUR.”

  “This bald head could use it.”

  “There’s a button,” Data said. “It says DEMO.”

  “Demonstration,” Squid agreed. “It seems it wants you to know its nature.”

  Data pushed the button. Abruptly fur grew on the head. In two thirds of a moment not only the pate but also the face, neck, and shoulders were thickly covered with brown fur.

  “Um, that’s a bit much,” Data said.

  Squid read the print below the plaque. STANDARD DISCLAIMER: THE PRICE OF THIS TALENT IS FIVE PERCENT OF YOUR SOUL.

  “Part of my soul!” Data exclaimed. “Outrageous!”

  “What would a pedestal want with part of a soul?” Squid asked.

  The gray pedestal shifted and became a hunched green gnome. “It would free me from this captivity and let me go home,” he said. Then he reverted to the pedestal. The head on it was now bald again, and all was gray. The demonstration had been made.

  Data shuddered. “It’s a punishment, or something. He’s caught until someone buys his talent.”

  “This must be a punishment planet,” Squid said. “What a horror!”

  “I feel guilty, but I don’t want this talent,” Data said.

  “Neither do I,” Squid agreed. “Not that I’m looking for one.”

  “At least now we understand how it works. I’m sorry I suggested it.”

  “At least it is purely random. No one would have predicted that we’d come here.”

  “Well, now that we are here, we should follow through. I hate the system, but maybe a bit of my soul will buy the freedom of some suffering creature.”

  Squid held up the key. “Skeleton Key, where is there another useful talent?”

  The key twitched a new direction. There was a path there. Maybe the key was indicating the path rather than the talent.

  They walked on. This path led to an enclosed field. The plaque by the gate said STUD FARM. WE GROW FINE STUDS FOR STUDDED TIRES.

  “Do we even need to see the demo?” Data asked. “This is obviously an export market.”

  “Maybe those studs go to Mundania, where I understand they use tires,” Squid said. “In any event, this is not exactly a talent.”