by K B Cinder
Elena
I never knew pain like the one that pierced my heart when Jason showed his scar to me, revealing his ultimate moment of vulnerability. It was as terrifying as witnessing a superhero fall, the immortal one showing he too was human. But I would never turn my back on him and run or declare him damaged. Because he wasn’t. He was the strongest man I knew, scars and all.
He didn’t have to say another word more about it, but he did. He shared his memories, the two of us sobbing as he poured his heart out, the man of stone crumbling to pieces. I built him back up as each pebble fell, piecing him together again. It was the least I could do for the man I loved.
I didn’t tell him then, but I knew I would as soon as he was ready. Maybe he needed a little longer, but he was worth it. He needed to feel my love at the moment–not hear it. In time he would know, and a sliver of me dared to think he’d share his love in return, but I tried not to get my hopes up. Love was complicated for him, but I would sort through it at his side.
We sat there for the longest time, holding each other through the pain, and I was thankful the world hadn’t lost him all those years before. He was more than a beautiful man; he was a soul meant to brighten the world. He may have sealed himself off with work, but there was so much he offered. Friendship. Wisdom. Humor. Love. I was as sure of it as I was sure his eyes were blue.
Eventually, we crawled into bed, wrapped in one another while I stroked his hair, soft snores soon escaping his lips. I disentangled our limbs, desperate to freshen up, not wanting to leave streaks of black across the sheets from my eyes. It took time for the involuntary sobs to cease, but once they did, I felt confident enough to venture out of the room.
Tally was lying in the hall outside our door, her eyes warming my heart at a glance. I reached down and stroked her, her tail smacking against the floor as she rolled to her back for some belly rubs.
“Everything good?” a deep voice asked.
I turned my head to see Ethan leaning against the wall at the far end of the hall, a tumbler in his hand. “Yes,” I replied, standing and straightening. “Just coming to rinse my face before bed.”
“Can you talk to Luke and me in the living room when you’re done?” he asked, his rumbling voice making my skin prickle.
I nodded before hurrying to the bathroom, my nerves roaring to life. I understood why he was so cautious about me. They were protective of their older brother, and I had to earn their trust. I couldn’t imagine the pain they’d went through watching their older brother suffer.
When I flicked on the light, a raccoon greeted in the mirror, my eyes smeared to hell and back with eye makeup. Likewise, my thumbs were marred, streaks lining them. I made quick work of the makeup fiasco with a washcloth before going to face the brothers.
They were sitting on opposite sofas, so I took the space next to Luke, the more welcoming of the two. He was nursing a beer, his face worn with worry, while Ethan kept his eyes on mine, harsher than Jason’s could ever be.
“He asleep?” Ethan asked.
I nodded, sinking back into the pillows, feeling hopelessly small in the room of massive men. While Jason was built, his brothers were jacked, looking lethal when they weren’t smiling.
“He told you, I assume,” he continued, raising a brow.
I nodded again before a tiny sob came crawling out of hiding, my hands flying up to stifle it. Luke’s arm reached out to stroke my shoulder gently, his hand enormous.
“We love him more than anything, and we’ll do anything to make sure nothing happens to him. We almost lost him.” Ethan’s words were meant as fact, but they came across menacing when paired with the hard glint in his eyes. “What are your intentions with him?”
Luke spun his attention from me to Ethan, dropping his hand from me. “Seriously?”
I ignored their quarrel, locking eyes with Ethan. “I love him,” I declared. “I don’t have any intentions other than making him the happiest man alive.”
Ethan nodded, his jaw still hard, the force of his gaze unyielding. “He loves you too. He may not say it, but he does. Give him time. That’s all I ask.”
My eyes welled with fresh ears, relieved to hear the words finally. They might not have fallen from Jason’s lips, but his brothers knew him better than anyone. “I’ll give him all the time he needs,” I assured.
A faint smile touched Ethan’s lips, his eyes softening. “I knew the moment I saw you two together that he was happy. Truly happy – not puppy love.”
I brushed a fallen tear, my composure collapsing brick by brick. “This isn’t puppy love,” I replied, forcing down a sob. “This is it. The real deal.”
“So, you two met at work?” Luke asked. “I never thought I’d see the day that the king of rules would break them.”
I shook my head with a smile. “We chatted on an app back in June, a month before he showed up in Ithaca.”
“And you knew you worked together?” he laughed, eyes wide.
I thought back to that first day in the office, our less than stellar meeting front and center. “Not at all. We didn’t find out who one another were until we met in September.”
Both brothers cackled, Ethan’s eyes drifting to the doorway as they did. “Brother!” he greeted, waving.
I turned to see Jason leaning against the doorjamb, his hair messy from sleep. “You abandoned cuddles for my brothers?” he asked, a lopsided grin lighting up his face.
I smiled, my heart bursting with love for the man across the room. “I was just telling them how much you hated me when we met.”
“Did you tell them how you and Lee were talking about how much I must have sucked in the sack?” he asked, a dangerous spark flashing in his eyes.
I patted the seat beside me, beckoning him forth as his brothers howled. “No, but we were just getting to that.”
Elena
After that somber night, the weekend went without a hitch, his brothers filling the roles of ones I never had. The mood turned — Ethan’s aloofness now a warmth that rivaled Luke’s, though he kept his clothes on thankfully. We ate, drank, laughed, and explored, taking on Boston with everything we had from the bars North End to the shops of Newbury Street.
By the time we hugged them goodbye and boarded our flight, I was running on fumes. Our time in the city was a rollercoaster, but we came out stronger as a couple, and I was confident it was just the beginning. And best of all, Dad was feeling better, and we already made plans to head to his place together for Christmas.
We crashed at my place once we were back in Ithaca and parted ways in the morning, his flight to Chicago leaving at ten. I left late for work to sneak in time together before his long week away, but it was worth the demerit. It was the perfect way to start off December, the last month we’d share in the city. With a heart-stopping kiss, we parted ways, him to his future and me to my hopefully soon-to-be past.
I strolled into the office with a little extra pep in my step after nine. I grabbed a gingerbread latte on the way in, each whiff a reminder that it would all soon be over. I was confident Reginald would reach out with an opportunity, one I would snatch up so fast his head would spin.
As I made my way to my desk, I spied a bug-eyed Lee waiting like a hawk, her attention glued to me with each step. She was usually up to her elbows in work by then, so something had to be up for her to be so frazzled.
Her arms crossed and her cheeks sucked in, waiting to unleash hell my way. “I’ve been texting you!” she hissed as I set my things down. “All morning!”
Shit. I still had my cell on airplane mode. I offered her a weak smile, scrambling for an excuse. “I’m sorry. I overslept and was rushing around to get ready. I haven’t checked it.”
She ignored my lackluster response and did a quick scan of our surroundings. “They reassigned Monica to HR. She’s some kind of assistant now.”
“What? Why?” I figured she’d be written up as usual for her antics, not moved, and HR seemed like the last place someone with her
attitude should be. It’s hard to enforce policies when you break them all.
She shrugged, shaking her head. “Marty won’t say, but she didn’t take it well.”
“I can only imagine.” I turned my computer on, glancing over at Monica’s station before sitting down. Sure enough, it was cleared.
“Girl, you missed her freaking out! You picked the worst day ever to come in late! It was glorious!”
I was glad I missed it. I was much happier cuddling with Jason than seeing that psycho lose it. “Who’s taking her place?”
If we hired someone capable, I would be over the moon. Knowing that both Lee and I were looking elsewhere made proper replacements a must. I didn’t want to screw other coworkers over. It wasn’t their fault Croft sucked.
Lee blew on her coffee, nose scrunching. “No idea.”
I groaned. That meant all Monica’s stuff would hit our desks, likely riddled with errors.
“She’s on the warpath, so watch out,” she warned.
I figured she would be, but eventually, she had to own up to her own mistakes.“We didn’t do anything.”
“It doesn’t matter,” she scoffed. “You know her.”
I smirked. “Good thing she’s down the hall.”
If she wanted to rant and rave at anyone, we were out of striking range. She’d have to find new victims.
Lee cringed. “This will get ugly. She’s out for blood.”
* * *
The rest of the morning was a blur, over three-hundred unread emails waiting for attention. Most were routine, but I had a few fires to extinguish thanks to Monica.
By the time I ran to the bathroom, I felt like I would explode with pee, turning into Marty during our road trip. I was relieved to find the ladies’ room odor-free. Unfortunately, the orange-scented spray intended to freshen the place smelled more like shitrus thanks to its use, forever ruining Creamsicles and gagging me at a whiff.
As I washed my hands, I glanced at my reflection, surprised how perky I looked with bright eyes and rosy cheeks. While the morning with Jason was the likely cause, the extended time out of Ithaca didn’t hurt either.
I fingered through my hair as I adjusted my part, the pesky waves rebelling from my careful crafting. The scar was fading, but not as quickly as I hoped, still visible against my pale skin. I bought a cheap cream to help fade it, but part of me knew I should have purchased the pricier pick for faster results.
The door flew open, smacking against the trashcan, startling me out of my wits.
A raging blond appeared, heels clicking against the tile. She didn’t go into a stall; she stalked right up to me at the sinks.
“Hi, Monica,” I greeted, attempting to keep it friendly. I hadn’t been in to see anything, so hopefully, she’d vent and disappear.
“Don’t give me that, Julian!” she snapped, slamming a makeup compact down on the counter with a comb. She fussed with her hair in the mirror, glaring at me through the reflection.
So much for that. “Excuse me?”
Her eyes were like slits, pure hatred burning. “Don’t play dumb, bitch!”
“Okay, I don’t know what crawled up your ass, but have a nice day, Monica.”
“Oh, really?” she laughed.
“Yeah, really. Have a nice day.” I turned to walk away but had my wrist snatched harshly. I froze, surprised she laid a hand on me. Monica was a raging bitch, but she was never physical.
“It’s your fault I’m in that stupid closet down the hall now!” she accused, nails biting into my flesh.
“I had nothing to do with that! I wasn’t even here!” I defended, trying to twist my wrist out of her grasp. Each turn dug the nails further, stinging like crazy.
“Like you didn’t go to Marty about me?” she huffed.
“No, I didn’t, and I have more important things to worry about than you.”
Her lips pulled back in a sneer. “Oh, isn’t that funny? Someone has been whispering in his ear that I wasn’t pulling my weight. Funny, because you’ve used that phrase before.”
“Plenty of people use that phrase, and he gets a copy of the report daily. I had nothing to do with whatever happened between you two.”
She laughed, the shrieking bouncing off the walls around us. “Oh, sure! You’ve hated me since we met! Now you finally got your wish! How convenient!”
“Let go of me!” I ordered, pulling to get away. “That’s not true, and you know it!”
Her nails dug in more. “Yes, it is!”
“Monica, I’ve tried to be your friend over the years. You weren’t having it. I learned to work with you, regardless.”
“Take your friendship and shove it up your ass.”
“Thanks,” I muttered, finally freeing my wrist, red welts standing where her nails were.
“This isn’t the end of this!” she threatened. “You really think I’ll let you get away with this?”
“Whatever, Monica. You need help.”
I hurried out of the bathroom, knowing I should report her, especially with the fresh marks on my wrist, but not wanting more drama. Now that she was off the team, I didn’t have to deal with her anymore. Letting the feud fizzle was the best move in the long run. No matter what tricks Monica pulled, I was done playing her games.
Jason
Nothing put a smile on my face like seeing a $1.8 million deposit pending in my bank account. Okay, maybe a phenomenal blowjob would, but it still felt damn good and softened the blow of selling my dream home.
The house went for more than I expected, and since I paid it off, the extra money would go straight towards my new place. I toured a few more homes while in Chicago during the first half of the week, but nothing caught my eye. Checking out houses alone didn’t feel right, and I would bring Elena along the next time. Ultimately, I skipped the apartment route in favor of buying a house, a home Elena would be a part of. I wanted her to be comfortable there, too; therefore, she was an essential decision-maker.
I’d have to float in a hotel for a few weeks, but it would be nothing new after Ithaca. It didn’t feel much different from an apartment, aside from people wandering around with luggage and a continental breakfast spread each morning.
I interviewed a few more assistants while I was in town, too, but still came up empty-handed. It wasn’t that they weren’t qualified, as many of them were overly so, but each cover letter lacked spunk. I didn’t feel passion bouncing from the page. Obviously, no one’s life ambition was to be an assistant, but it didn’t hurt to at least pretend to be semi-interested.
Once I hit Florida, the last chapter of my journey there began, memories stirring up at every turn. It was strange to go along for the final walk-through with the buyers, especially when we lingered in the rear living room. The wife spun around, her arms outstretched in glee, planning an elaborate Christmas party in the room. Little did she know that a few years earlier, I was laying there in a pool of blood, a 9mm at my side.
I found it morbidly amusing, an inside joke I couldn’t stop smiling at, finding humor in my darkest hour. There I was ready to end it all and almost had, only to stand in the same room years later. It was a shame I didn’t realize all I had and would have in the future. I had plenty to be thankful for now, from a strengthened bond with my brothers to a brilliant woman by my side, a beautiful soul who I missed like crazy.
I wished I could have flown her to Florida for the weekend, but I didn’t ask, knowing she needed time with Hank. Since NorCon, she barely spent any time with him, and I knew it wasn’t fair to keep the two apart.
I had a few last-minute errands to squeeze in anyway, like a trip to the bank after selling an artifact from my former life. It was a beauty of a car but was rife with bad memories, the spot I first discovered the world as I knew it was a lie. Now I was free, the sale flooding my account with filthy money.
I stood in line behind an elderly couple, Each supporting the other as they stood, their bodies worn from time yet their commitment as strong as ever. It w
as the sort of sight that gave me hope. True love was there for the taking. All I had to do was embrace it, and I was ready to.
Since our talk in Boston, I knew I loved Elena. I fought it for so long, but once I let go of the fear, it was clear as day. My resistance wasn’t because of what I heard her and Lee say all those months ago, poking at my manhood. It wasn’t because of Croft. Perhaps I knew from that first meeting I would love her, my subconscious recognizing it before I did.
I couldn’t wait to tell the woman I loved how I felt about her. I couldn’t do it over the phone, so I’d have to wait until Monday, preferably over a home-cooked meal with a bottle of the best red money could buy. I was still debating if I’d follow it up with an offer to move to Chicago with me, to start our journey together as one.
My position paid more than enough to keep us afloat, though I knew she was far too independent to settle for that, longing for a career of her own. I would exhaust every contact I had to find her a role if she let me. I loved her, and I’d do anything to make her happy.
The glass menagerie of a bank did little to stifle the hot Florida sun, practically magnifying the rays as they bounced around the room. Sweat pricked my lip as I waited, my button-down far too warm for the south despite the season.
“Next,” a teller called, the couple ahead of me shuffling forwards. The husband leading the wife as they walked, her fragile arm looped in his as he inched along with a walker.
Someday that would be Elena and me. Hopefully, I’d still have my hair, not that it’d matter to Elena. If I had any hair loss, it’d be from worrying over her tripping over her own two feet or serial killers thanks to Forensics. We’d have that lazy dog she wanted, one of many we’d have over the years, and a house full of love and laughter.
