by Lucy Smoke
We went at it repeatedly the rest of the night, exhausting ourselves completely. He would wake me with a bite to my neck just before plunging into me, taking me all over again. I would wake him by slipping on top of him and licking my way up his chest. I'd ride him furiously, almost drawing blood when my nails would drag down his chest as we came again and again together.
This was what we had needed. I loved the sweetness of Ezra when he screwed me in the dressing room, but sometimes I needed hard. I needed violent.
And Tobi gave me that in every way that no other could.
7
“Whoa, now!”
The next morning, I awakened to the smell of coffee. I sat up and stretched, feeling the ache of mine and Tobi's extracurricular activities throughout my whole body.
I smiled and bit my lip, remembering every detail of his strong body moving mine like a marionette. I was almost turned on just thinking about every kiss, bite and lick he gave every inch of me. I shook my head in complete disbelief that it had happened. That any of this was happening. I believed it when Ezra and I went at it, but having a second one from the tasty trio coming at me like a man possessed was edging on the line of insanity.
I had joked to myself and fantasized about having my way with all three of them, but I never actually believed it'd happen.
I slipped out of bed and threw on my robe, heading to the bathroom for a quick shower before I faced Tobi or the others. As I washed myself, I decided it was time that I had a discussion with the guys about what was going on between us. It was obvious they either had intentions of sharing me, or each just maybe wanted a onetime fling. Either way, I wanted to know. There was no way this would become a relationship. They would be leaving right after the show, and when they finished the cabin. Everyone would return to their everyday lives, and I'd have an awesome story to look back on about my holiday fling with three men who made me feel alive again. They helped me forget the well of loneliness I thought I'd be swimming in this Christmas without my dad.
I dressed and threw my hair up into a messy bun before making my way to the kitchen.
Tobi leaned against the counter sipping a cup of coffee. I hoped to walk in and he'd be at least half naked still, but unfortunately, he was fully dressed for the day. He smiled when I entered the room and handed over a travel mug of coffee.
"Figured you could use some coffee."
I took a sip and moaned. That first sip of coffee in the morning was always the best. "You figured right. Thank you."
He stood there staring at me with an expression I couldn't quite decipher.
"What?" I asked with a raised brow, continuing to drink my liquid heaven.
"Nothing," he said with a shake of his head and a soft smile. "Just wondering what you're thinking about with all this. Me and you. You and the other two."
I bobbed my head, knowing he probably thought I'd be freaking out about everything.
"I'm fine. But I do want to talk to you guys about what this even is. Ezra and Jasper had to have known you were over here the whole night and you all talked about Ezra and me so casually." I shrugged my shoulders like it was obvious.
Tobi stared at me with a tilt of his head, curiosity lighting his face. "And that doesn't bother you. The idea that we share?"
I gave another shrug. "I wouldn't have done anything with you last night if I didn't understand what I was getting into. Not exactly my first rodeo being with two men at the same time."
"Wait what?"
I bit my lip and smiled coyly. "Maybe we should save this convo for when Ez and Jas are here. " I walked from the kitchen and noticed he'd lit a fire in the fireplace.
I grinned at it and peered out the window. Snow covered the ground at least four feet deep from what I saw and was still falling. I scrunched my brows and flipped a light switch, but nothing happened. I turned questioning eyes on Tobi who'd sat on the couch and watched me.
“About what I told you last night, I wanted to make sure I didn’t freak you out with all the abuse talk. I mean I know I’m pretty aggressive, but I’d never do anything to intentionally hurt you.”
I nodded with a soft smile. “You didn’t weird me out and I never thought you would. If anything, it makes me understand you more. It must have been hard to grow up around that and still have to live with the scars of it.”
He nodded and ran a hand over his beard. “Yeah. My dad had died from an overdose when I was a baby and with the next man, my mom kind of dove deeper into the drugs. The man she married was a piece of shit and just as bad as her with them, only he had a violent streak. It was a normal thing to get a cigarette put out on me or get beat with a belt.”
I looked at him in horror. “Fuck. That’s fucked up on so many levels. What happened if you don’t mind me asking?” I asked as I leaned against the edge of the windowsill.
“CPS finally figured out what was going on and took me away. I was sent to a foster family who weren’t much of a step up from my parents. I was bullied heavily by the kids those people already had and ended up having to learn to take care of myself. CPS found out about them after a couple of years and finally placed me with the family where I met Ezra and Jasper. They taught me what real parents should act like and the guys taught me to trust again.”
I looked sadly at him. “And I thought my life sucked as a kid. I just have mommy issues since she left when I was only five. My dad raised me on his own. I was bitter about it for a while. My past has nothing on what you and Ezra have gone through. I don’t even know if I can handle hearing Jasper’s story at this rate.”
Tobi nodded. “Yeah, none of our stories are pretty. I’m sure Jasper will tell you his.”
My heart broke for these guys. Sure, it sucked not having a maternal figure, but Tobi didn’t have any parental figures until he was older. If I hadn’t had my dad, I would’ve ended up in the system just like them. So, at least I was lucky to have one loving parent in my life. I wasn’t joking when I said I was worried to hear Jasper’s story.
"How'd you manage to make coffee with the power off?" I asked, changing the subject. I figured I’d pried enough into Tobi’s past.
"French press. We have one next door. I'm thankful this place has gas stoves so I could heat the water. Makes better coffee than a machine anyway."
He was right. I'd never had coffee from a French press and was impressed with it. I was definitely asking Sara for one for Christmas. She'd been hounding me for present ideas anyways.
Not even two seconds after asking, the front door opened. Jasper practically ran into the room to get out of the cold. I laughed at how bundled up he and Ezra were, but quickly stopped when Jasper came right at me. I knew what he was doing and immediately put down my coffee then ran and jumped over the back of the couch to try to escape him.
"Come on, Low! I just want a hug!" Jasper shouted just before scooping me up.
I yelped when his ice-covered jacket touched all the places I didn't have clothing covering me. He spun me around and planted a loud kiss on my cheek. I giggled and smacked his shoulder before he released me.
"That was just mean! I'm barely awake right now."
"Oh, we know," Ezra answered, giving me a quick hug. He thankfully had removed his jacket. "We've been waiting for you to wake up the last two hours. Tobi figured it'd be best to let him talk to you before we came by."
I nodded and took a seat on the couch again, all of them crowding around me.
"I'm just going to cut to the chase,” Ezra said, sitting on the coffee table to face me. “We all want you. Simple as that. The question is, do you want all of us?”
I didn’t even hesitate. “Yes. I do.”
Jasper let out a laugh. “I was not expecting such a quick response.”
“You will when you hear she’s apparently been with two guys at once before,” Tobi added.
“Really?” Asked Ezra in surprise. “You’ve been in a polyamorous relationship?”
I grabbed my coffee cup back up, knowing I w
as going to need a little more energy if we were going into this part of my past.
“Once. It was twin brothers. It only lasted a few months, though. I figured out pretty quickly after so many failed relationships, that one person wasn’t enough. I don’t know if you three have noticed, but I’m a damn handful. I have too much personality in one tiny body.”
While I was being honest, I omitted the real reason behind having a polyamorous relationship. It was because if one of them left, at least I still had another still there. I couldn’t take being abandoned by one more person in my life. I knew my dad hadn’t abandoned me, but it still felt like it sometimes since I was practically alone in the world. At least, I was until these guys showed up.
“Oh, really? We hadn’t noticed,” Tobi stated sarcastically.
I nudged him hard with my shoulder. “Be nice! I gave you great sex last night!” I said pointedly.
He gave me a sexy smile and held his hands up in surrender. “Alright, fair enough.”
“So, this isn’t new to you at all. That’s a plus.” Said Ezra.
“Or you three either. You all seemed like the type to share everything. I figured that out quickly after meeting you. None of you show any jealousy when any of you touch me.”
“Nope. We never get jealous,” Ezra answered. “We figure with how busy our lives are, it’d be hard for all of us to each have our own girl. Having one girl together is usually how we do things, but it’s always just fun. You’re the first we’ve actually wanted more of.”
I held up my hands. “Whoa now. I’m a fun kind of girl, not a relationship girl. I’m more than fine being with you guys while you’re here, but this is just a holiday thing. Nothing more. You guys leave when you’re done with the cabin anyways, so everyone will just go back to their regular lives. Got that?” I eyed each of them, letting them see I was totally serious.
Anytime someone stated that they wanted more than fun from me, I went into a panic. I sucked at love and really didn’t care for it anyways. No love here. Nope. But, as I thought about it and looked around at their stricken faces, something twisted in my gut. It was as if my mind was warring against the thought of them just being temporary. I’d never had that feeling before and it freaked me out. I couldn’t fall for these guys. My heart needed to remain stone. Family was where I distributed my love and that was it.
“If that’s what you want, Low, then I’m okay with that,” Ezra said with a resigned tone.
It was clear by how they all were looking at each other and me that they didn’t like my decision at all. But I knew they deserved better. They were amazing guys. I just wasn’t the one to give them what they wanted. I could give them my body and my time, but my heart was off the table.
“It is. Fun and that’s it.”
“Fun, I can do!” Jasper said excitedly, throwing an arm across my shoulders and biting my ear playfully.
I laughed and shoved his face away, not wanting to get turned on before I’ve had any food. I was barely surviving off the coffee after my night with Tobi and really needed to get some calories in me before tackling a sexual encounter with Jasper. Something told me, he’d be a hot lover, but he’d also be a handful.
“If fun is all you want, I’m in too,” Tobi added.
“It’s settled then,” I said happily. I was relieved to be getting away from talking about feelings. “Now, I’m starving and require food before any fun happens for any of you. Who wants to help make breakfast?”
Jasper answered by jumping from his seat and pushing a shoulder into my stomach, lifting me off the ground and over his shoulder to carry me to the kitchen in a fireman’s hold.
“As long as it’s my turn next, I will happily feed you, woman.” Jasper said before he turned his head to deliver a quick bite to my ass.
Damn it. Now, I was turned on and actually thinking of foregoing breakfast for once in my life.
Fucking men …
8
“Finish What You Start”
After that slightly awkward chat with the guys about the status of our relationship, the days began to fly by leading up to the show.
The storm only lasted about two days, which we all spent either playing random board games my dad had stashed away in an upstairs closet, drinking a little here and there, eating copious amounts of marshmallows by the fire, and them stealing kisses from me in between practicing the routine. Unfortunately, no other sexual escapades ensued during those two days, but I thankfully didn't have to wait long to be indulged.
I was well taken care of when I finally decided to show Jasper and Tobi my outfit for the show. They took turns ravishing me in the outfit. Jasper got to have a bit more of me, since he and I had yet to really have a turn together. I'd missed being touched by more than one person at the same time. It had been well over a year since my relationship with the twin brothers, so I'd forgotten just how tantalizing it was. Being bit, licked and kissed by two sets of mouths was enough to drive a normal girl insane with lust. With me, it was damn near perfect. Unfortunately, poor Ezra had been checking on the venue preparations when this happened. That was why it was only near perfect. I longed for three sets of mouths and hands on me, but it seemed like something always got in the way of them all taking me at once.
One was either having to go into town for supplies for the cabin, or having to check on preparations for the venue while also keeping in touch with those that were left in charge of their construction company during their absence. I was lucky to get just two of them that day.
At one point during the last week before the show, I finally looked around at my side of the cabin and decided it was time to embrace my dad giving me the okay to change it. It was as if having the guys here was taking the sting of his absence away little bits at a time every day. I saw what a wreck the cabin truly was. I knew how much my dad loved it, but it was mine now. Changing it for the better wouldn't erase what the cabin itself meant to him.
So, I bit the bullet and asked the guys for some help fixing a few things.
They were a bit surprised since I'd been against them touching a single thing when they'd first offered to help. Of course, they agreed wholeheartedly since the last thing left to do on their side of the cabin was install the new kitchen cabinets. I didn't really give them an explanation of why I changed my mind, but shocking enough they didn't ask for one. They just let it be. That made me admire them just a bit more.
Surprisingly, it felt good to have them know about my past. Sara was the only one I could really talk to about it, but even then, it still felt hard to breathe when I did. Not with them, though. With them, it was like learning to breathe again. It was a weird feeling and I questioned it quite a few times the rest of the day after that.
When the guys were finally finished with their side of the cabin, they started helping me with mine. I bought a second water heater so both cabins could finally have their own hot water, and they rigged it all up within two days like it was a piece of cake. I didn't have to yell at them anymore for taking all the hot water – which I'd done numerous times already. They fixed the bathroom floor where my ass had dented it in. They replaced a few light fixtures. And finally, they patched up a bunch of holes that Dad always said he'd get around to fixing, but never did. I went into town while they finished up their last-minute things in both cabins, and picked up some new decor to give my cabin the touch of me it always needed.
The day of the show, Jasper and I stayed behind while Tobi and Ezra went ahead to the venue. They left earlier that morning to do all the last-minute set ups with the decorations and made sure the lighting and sound were running smoothly. Jasper had stayed behind to load up all their clothes since the night before was their last night staying in the cabin. The renovations were done, and Stanley would be putting that for sale sign up the day after Christmas. I was going to stay with them tonight at their apartment in the city, then drive back home tomorrow.
I had been a mess all morning. My nerves were getting the best o
f me, though I wasn’t sure at this point if it was the show worrying me, or the fact I’d be alone again. The guys had done what they could to assure me it would all be fine, but I just couldn’t help pacing all over the place.
“Low, it’s going to be fine,” Jasper consoled me as I continued my pace back and forth in front of the fire place. “Just relax and it’ll all work out. I bet when you start you’ll even love it and not want to stop.”
That was easy for him to say. He sat on the couch with his feet propped on the coffee table like it was just a regular day. He and the others had been in the spotlight for a while and did this even every year. Stage fright was not something they really worried about. I, however, was on the verge of puking with how anxious I was.
“I can’t relax. I barely slept last night because I couldn’t stop thinking about how bad this could all turn out if I messed up. I have bad luck and am as graceful as a stampede of elephants.” I continued pacing, nervously biting at my nails as I stared at the fire in the fireplace.
I was hoping the warmth of it and the gentle crackling of the flames would help ease some of my tension, but it just wasn’t working.
Jasper was suddenly at my side, grabbing my shoulders to bring my pacing to a halt. He started gently kneading between my shoulder blades.
“You are going to drive yourself crazy if you don’t stop thinking about it. You need to be cool like me or you will end up messing up.”
I gave him a glare over my shoulder, but it felt pathetic considering his hands felt really good on my tense shoulders. It’s hard to glare at someone when they were massaging your shoulders. “That’s not exactly helpful advice. If I could switch off the nerves with the snap of my fingers, I definitely would.”
“Okay, how about this, I’ll tell you something about me to take your mind off it?” He supplied.
