by F. Bradshaw
It had been such a long time since I had felt anything close to the touch of a lover. I never really had one. Desire coiled between my legs begging to have release. Ryan’s other hand slid up my stomach settling over one breast cupping it in his hand. Voracious kisses consumed us both. The taste of him dizzying, and I wanted more. I bit down lightly on his lower lip tasting him. My hands dragged down his body slowly pulling my nails over his back. Urgently, he rose as he pulled me up with him.
“Keep your legs wrapped around me.”
I wrapped them fully around him holding myself at his hips. He stepped out of the tub kissing, holding, and caressing me. His hands in a quick motion unclasped my bra. He pulled the straps down and then threw it on the floor. I broke away from his mouth looking at his wide muscled chest. It rose and fell with each desperate breath. I kissed down his jaw feeling the warmth of his skin. I licked over his throat, and we slammed against the wall knocking things over.
They clanked loudly to the floor. Ryan pinned me against the wall with his body. He pulled my head up, and then kissed down my cheek over my neck and to the unclasped breast. His fingers pinched and caressed the nipple. His tongue licked, and then his teeth nipped at it. Pain and pleasure raced through my body. I moved my body under him and over his thick cock, feeling it rise despite the cold of my body. My fingers knotted in his hair, pulling him closer to me.
“Yes Ryan… Yes!”
I needed him, and I needed to feel him in me. Neither of us could stop now. His hand slid down from my breast to under my panties over my ass. His touch dominated and controlled me. The slow torch of his precise nips and sucks melted in me and desire grabbed hold. I ran my nails down his back with a moan.
My fingers pushed down pulling his ass to me. His dark moss eyes gazed up at me as he licked to the other breast happy with the red numb peak he left. The connection I had felt zapped from me to him. I needed to cement him to me. My mouth moved over to his exposed shoulder, and I bit down. The warmth of him flooded me, stopping him. He arched his body to me.
“I have to have you now,” he panted out.
His hand trailed down my body half ripping and half pulling off my underwear. Fire licked both of us. I licked over the wound pushing my body into him. He took my nipple back into the warm cavern of his mouth licking and nipping it. He pulled away from the wall and walked into his bedroom. He did not stop until he laid me back on the bed.
He pushed my thighs wider then let go of my nipple. He kissed the inside of my right thigh and then my left. Ryan’s thumb brushed over my slick folds over my clit. He moved in slow circles. He dropped to his knees in front of me. Hot breath clambered up my legs as his kissed from one leg to the other slowly up.
The aching need screamed in me. I moved my hips up to meet his strokes. He placed his mouth just over the drenched folds letting out a slow breath. The heat raced through the nerves and desire. It pulsed against me as his tongue licked slowly at my clit and then took the slow plunge in. He slipped in his fingers pulling apart the lips taking a lingering look before diving back in. He held my hips still making me take the lashings of his tongue as he pushed in deeper.
My thighs tightened further. The nerves in my body viciously called me to action. His tongue licked over my clit as he plunged two fingers in. My hands and nails rushed to his hair pulling him to me. I felt both pinned and freed as he pushed in deeper. His tongue licked at my clit making the sensations crackle through me. He started a faster rhythm.
“You are everything I have wanted.” His voice breathed against me.
I could not help but moan in response. I could still smell the blood from him. My body moved against him without thought. The pressure building in me, I needed release. I needed him. I craved every inch of him, and I wanted him deep within me. Every inch of my body was on fire and filled with desire. I was swollen with wants and desires. My turn to make him feel this. I was so close, and I wanted him just as close. This would not be hollow. He is connected to me. I pulled him up from his ravaging.
“My turn sweetheart,” I said with panting allure.
He moved on top of me as his cock brushed against the wetness that was surely going to drench us both ignoring my statement. The look in his eyes washed away the fear. I pushed Ryan to his back in a quick motion so that I was on top. Feverishly, he pushed his lips to mine. I could taste both of us. My hand steadied him and pushed up his chin as I nipped and kissed down his throat. The smell of the blood from the closing wound on his shoulder drew me closer to him. I bit down around his nipple lightly not breaking the skin but bringing the blood to the surface. His body bucked up to mine. It called to me as much as mine did to him. The electric connection ramped up begging me to take him. I kissed down his stomach. It was not rock hard abs, but soft and supple, excepting each kiss. My fingers trailed teasingly down to his cock.
Slowly, I circled the tip as I kissed down to the shaft. He was hard as he filled my hand, but the blood pumped faster. I licked across the tip. His body shuttered in response, and a bead of liquid escaped. I sucked down on his dick taking in his wide, full girth. He was not inadequate in any way. Would probably tear me open wider. I took him to the back of my throat sucking him down. A low moan pulled out of me. I wanted him. I moved back up licking and swirled my tongue around his dick.
“I don’t know how long I will last, if you keep it up,” he panted out.
I downed him again taking him in a quicker motion. His hand glided over my head and pushed at the speed he wanted it. My mouth was wet and slick beneath him but not full of warmth. He would need it. I raised my mouth from him and stroked him flicking my thumb over the top. I moved to his inner thigh and bit down taking in sweet warmth.
My mouth greedily soaked in the warmth of his blood. I needed this, and he needed more. I took in enough that filled me with warmth and just before, he would feel drunk. I licked down his cock again bringing the warmth he needed. He moaned out in satisfaction and replaced his hand. I applied pressure to the underside of his dick as I pulled back up. My teeth dragged lightly across it, bringing the blood to the surface. In a quick movement, he pulled me off him and beneath him.
“Your skin is flush with my blood, I like it.”
“It is more than your blood, Ryan.”
And it was more than his blood. I desired him. He parted my thighs wider and rubbed the tip of his dick over me. I wanted this. I wanted him deep in me, and I didn’t know if I could ever let him go. He pushed the tip in slowly, testing. Sweat I had not noticed trailed down his body. I inhaled deep taking him in… blood, cotton, pine black coffee, sugar, and aftershave. Ryan’s smell filled every part of me, and I thrust my hips toward him. He pushed in deeper taking no prisoners. I could feel myself stretching, ripping open for him.
He lingered for a moment and looked into my eyes. What did he see? Deep dark moss green eyes with hints of gold looked at me. He picked up the rhythm. Both of our bodies moved together as if we were always supposed to be melded as one. My hands grabbed onto his shoulders after my nails ran up his back. Both of us raggedly breathing in and out unable to stop this searing desire that locked us together. My body closed around his cock as the orgasm was ready to burst any moment.
“Let go. Just let go. I will always be here for you.”
At his words, I let go and rode the wave of passion, desire, lust, no… love. He loved me. I loved him. Ryan followed, filling me full of him and his warmth. His lips met mine. Both mouths open as he breathed in and out. My arms locked around him. He pulled his body in as close as we could be, wrapping his arms around me. Pleasure had ripped through both of us binding us together. We lay stated in each other’s embrace. His heartbeat slowed to a steady rhythm, and we just let the world exist without us.
Nothing but Ryan mattered. Monster or not, he did not see me as that. It was the first time he could see that I was more than my past and maybe I could, too. Maybe now all the ghosts of what I had done would finally leave me. He moved his head to my nec
k, and I threw the comforter over us. I was finally at peace. I did not need to run from him, and he held me close. I let go from this conciseness.
Chapter 17
I let him continue to sleep as long as I could. The drug wore off, and I could smell his blood just below the surface. His arm so tightly wrapped around me I could feel his pulse. His smell had faded in the background. All I could smell was his rich, delicious blood. The wet slightly saturated clothes on the floor whispered to me. The trail of blood on the floor to the bed called to me. His hands wrapped around me and screamed to me. Take me.
It is a simple need, a simple desire. I knew which side was winning. I never wanted to move. I never wanted this moment to end. I had been waiting for someone like him my whole life. Why did I get him after I was dead? I could not stay any longer. I wanted one last touch, one last thing to remember him. What I was going to do would kill us both.
I moved slowly trying not to wake him. I lifted my body from his leaning over him. His face was idyllic as he slept. The softness, the smile, the victory he had won showed through. His arm still wrapped around me felt like a chain holding me steadfast to him. I rested my head back on his chest. I rose with his breath breathing out and in.
The smell of him rushed down to me. The taste of him breathing into me ignited my hunger and desire. I touched the side of his face, but he did not recoil from it pushing his face into my hand. Why did he dig me up? Why did I to do this? Why? I don’t know him. I don’t know anything about him. He helped them do this to me. Who is Ryan? Why did he help them?
His hand clenched down on my waist. Ryan still tried to hold me close. He was only holding death closer to him. The rage started a slow simmer. The idea that he knew and did nothing was finally setting in. He let me believe in him, in the lies of letting someone in. One moment is all I wanted, one moment to be free, to go back to before I was what I was, one moment to be with him. The sad part was that was what I had gotten from him. How could I ask for that? The universe was a cruel and unrelenting force.
To give me the one thing I want most in a life, and I should have had, then to make him the thing I was going to hurt. Ryan hurt me, but the question remained of why? Why did I let him in when I had refused others? The reality was that I had chosen to be alone. Would I always make that choice? Was he the evil villain I wanted to paint him as? Did he really know, or did I make the assumption like always? Ryan reached out his hand for mine. I could not deny his request. His hand in mine was perfect. It was right. They were always meant to be together. His thumb moved against my skin with the connection unwilling to break.
He put our hands over his heart in a sweet endearing movement. I could feel it beating just below the skin. It was calling me in more than one way. The sound under my hand whispered, “Drink me.” I could feel the tears coming. I wanted to have him. I wanted to be the normal girl who falls in love and gets to have everything that had been missing in my life. I wanted everything he had. I wanted everything he could have given me if I were not a monster. I tried to breathe, to make them stop. I needed them to stop.
When he knows me, the connection will be gone with nothing left but a distant memory shrouded in darkness. I watched him sleep. I prolonged the moment that I did not want to end. What was between us had barely begun. It had barely scratched the surface. His body was fighting against the cold of mine. I wanted to lie back down next to him. I wanted to stay in his embrace forever. I wanted to go back to the tub with his body under mine, his heart beating in my chest.
The memories from last night kept me pinned to his side. I could feel his hand as I had last night. The memory of him as his fingers brushed over my skin softly with delicate confidence. The subtle touch of his fingers gently coaxing away the blood, and dirt freeing my skin from its prison. The memories all called me. I could feel them as though they had just happened. Our kiss. The moments where I knew letting him in would be his death.
My hunger was still there. It was no longer dormant. The hunger called to me. No drug to stop me. I could not contain it. I needed blood. I could feel it move through his hand as it still clutched mine pulling me from the sweet memories. Blood was a necessity. I bent down closing the gap between our faces. I closed my eyes hoping that I could just stop. I listened to his heart. Thump… thump. It was even and smooth. I kissed him letting my cold mouth overtake his.
The warmth of his lips reminded me of my hunger. The taste of his breath as he exhaled brought my fangs to his lips. One touch, one taste, would be the end of us. How could he accept a monster feeding on him? How could he stand it last night? I remembered the warmth of his blood sliding down my throat. His eyes fluttered open and looked into mine.
The look… was it permission or fear? He raced a hand up to my cheek the warmth leaving an awakened tingle. He pulled me deeper into the kiss opening my lips taking in its coldness replacing it with his warmth. The hunger more insistently crawled up my veins. Looking at him, the room was going dark. Each beat of his heart sent red flashes of light to the darkness. I pulled away from him knowing what would come next. Ryan reached for me and pulled me to his shoulder right at his neck.
“I know what you need, take it.” His voice was warm but had an edge of fear. I wanted to turn him down. I wanted to run from the room, but his heartbeat kept me there captivated by what I wanted most.
I sunk into his flesh tasting it tear away from my fangs as they sunk in deeper. The hot blood rushed into my mouth as I drew back my fangs. I sucked greedily at the blood, not waiting for his pulse to bring it to me. Every part of me awoke with his blood. He wrapped his arms around me holding me closer to him. I closed my eyes drinking in everything he would give me. I would love him even though this was not right, and he knew it. We both knew it. How could it work?
“I am never letting you go. We belong together, and we always have. You just don’t understand. I will make you understand.” As he spoke, I felt memories creep in. The problem was that they were not mine. I could feel my right arm broken, and the pain searing in. I had never broken a bone. The emergency room I knew well. I could never forget that place, but this was not my memory. It felt like I was walking in someone else’s skin.
“Sir, someone will see you soon. We have had a lot of accidents tonight.” Her smile is very friendly just like her tired blue eyes. She was older, maybe in her late forties. The dark circles said she had been here for a long shift.
“No problem. I am waiting on my sister to pick me up anyway. I should have skipped the bike tonight.” The voice coming from the body I was in I knew. Ryan’s voice came out of my mouth. No, this was his memory and his mouth. I could not make him move. I was trapped in him.
He looked around the room as the nurse walked away. In from the night, accompanied by a police officer, I walked in. I looked different through his eyes. I remembered that night. I was in my ripped jeans, fang-banger tank top, and flip-flops. My hair was half pulled back and sticking to my face from the rain.
“I am looking for my grandparents. I need to see them!” I sounded even worse than I remembered. The nurse just held up a hand to me as she finished her phone conversation. I wanted to rip the phone from her hands and hit her upside her head. She just continued with the call.
“Bitch, hang up the fucking phone and tell me where they are!” I somehow forgot calling her a bitch. I felt how he felt looking at me. He was curious about me. I seemed so passionate to him. I watched myself through his eyes assessing me. He looked over my body with interest. Looking at him, I felt desired. He desired me then?
“Miss, you need to wait your turn. We will be with you. Go have a seat and someone will call you. I am very busy, can’t you see that. Other people are looking for their family, too.” Her dismissive tone, even in his memory, made me want to draw her blood.
“They sent the cop to get me, so it is fucking important, and you need to tell me where they are!” My voice sounded weird hearing it from his perspective. It sounded so much like a woman, something
I never thought I sounded like.
“What are the names?” Her tone was flippant as she hung up the phone. I think she knew I was going to kill her if she waited any longer. However, from his perspective, the cop who stood to the right of me was what drew her attention. I never saw the cop or the look he gave the receptionist.
“Mr. Frank King and Mrs. Judy King.” My voice was shaky, and he stood. Ryan was right behind me. He studied both her and me. I rapped my fingers on the counter as if willing to make her type faster. She needed to go faster. The thought that he wanted them to be ok filled my brain… no, his brain. He watched as I turned my head looking for them to come out.
“Have a seat, and I will have the doctor out here in a moment. He will need to speak with you.”
“Just tell me what is going on!”
“I am sorry, miss, but I don’t have the answers. Please have a seat, and the doctor will be right with you.” Her face as he looked at it conveyed that she knew more. I had not seen it. He took his seat and looked about the room. His eyes met mine, and I just stared, expressionless, back at him. I knew what I was thinking. I could see it in my face. Ash and that crash were center in my mind. I had done it, yet again. I sat next to him one seat away. He watched me intently. His mind trying to find the right words to strike up a conversation. I did not look at him. I knew I had watched the door waiting on the doctor. A nurse tapped on his shoulder.
“The doctor will see you now, Mr. Jackson. Just follow me, please.” Her voice was sweet, and yet he looked at me. Slowly, he rose and walked off with her. Something deeper in him tried to pull to the surface, but the memories started to fade. I was pulling away from him.
