Last Christmas

by Kate Brian

hadn't brought you home sooner." He reached for her hand. "And they really loved your accent." He grinned.

  "Works like a charm," she said in an exaggerated southern drawl, warmth crawling from her neck into her

  cheeks. "I really liked them, too," she lied.

  "They want to get your parents to Southampton some time in August." Daniel's eyes widened as he realized

  his mistake. "I mean, your mom. Or your dad. Whatever." He cleared his throat and pressed his palms into his

  wool pants. "Do they, like, ever do stuff together?" he hedged.

  Ariana's face burned with embarrassment. "Occasionally."

  223

  Very occasionally, she added silently.She felt the familiar protective walls rising around her, and it did not

  feel good. She'd been so open about her parents with Thomas that she had to remind herself to be guarded

  with Daniel. He would never understand-not that she even wanted him to.

  "Well, I'm sure they'd do this," Daniel said. "I mean, if they knew how important it was to you."

  Not important at all, you mean? Ariana thought wryly.

  "I'm sure," she said.

  "Good. Anyway, my parents asked how serious we were. They wanted to know what our plans were for next

  year. "He looked relieved to be changing the subject, but as far as Ariana was concerned, this one wasn't any

  better.

  Ariana bristled. "What did you tell them?"

  She had to concentrate to keep from tugging at the neck of her sweater. It felt like the diner was getting

  warmer with every passing second. Like it was a giant oven, and someone was slowly turning up the heat.

  Torturing her.

  "I told them we'd make it work long-distance, and that you'd probably spend most weekends up in

  Cambridge." He paused, searching her face. "I told them I loved you."

  Weekends in Cambridge? They'd never discussed how they would handle next year. She already had a plan

  for next year, and it didn't involve Daniel.

  "I love you, too." The words sounded cold, mechanical, coming from her mouth. But Daniel didn't seem to

  notice.

  224

  "Then it's settled," he said smugly. Vomit. Barf. Heave.

  Ariana imagined Thomas laughing at her inner dialogue and tried not to smile.

  "Oh. And I also told my parents that you were unbelievable in bed," he said, deadpan. "In fact, maybe we

  should head back to my bed right now. It so needs to be christened."

  Already taken care of, Ariana thought wryly. Thomas would have loved it if she said that out loud.

  "What do you think?" Daniel asked.

  "Daniel!" she hissed, feigning offense.

  "Sorry. Couldn't resist," he said with a wolfish smile.

  Ariana clucked her tongue and shook her head, which was exactly what the old her would have done. What

  she really wanted to do was tell him she knew all about his conquest list and smack him across the face. But

  she couldn't. Not yet. Instead, she watched him over the top of her menu as he looked around for a waitress.

  Daniel was such an idiot. He believed that she loved him, and that she'd still been a virgin when she'd slept

  with him over break. Having sex with him had put her in control, and he didn't even know it. He was the

  naive one. Not her.

  "Does anybody work here?" he said to Ariana. He sighed in frustration. "Doesn't matter. I'll be right back and

  then we can order."

  He slid out of the booth and ambled over to the restroom. Ariana watched him go with a smirk. She loved

  being in control.

  She felt someone lingering next to the booth, and she glanced up to see a tall, pretty brunette staring down at

  her.

  225

  "Hi. I'll have a small salad and a tea, but I'm not sure what he wants," Ariana said, glancing toward the

  bathroom.

  The girl smiled condescendingly. "I'm not your waitress, Ariana," she said. "But if I had to guess what your

  boyfriend wants, I'd say it'd probably be a girlfriend who doesn't cheat on him the second he turns his back."

  "What?" Ariana's blood ran cold. Okay, there was no way she'd just heard the girl correctly. The diner was

  loud and crowded, and the girl must have somehow mistaken her for someone else. That was the only

  explanation. But how had she known Ariana's name?

  "What? You don't agree?" the girl said blithely. Her voice was gravelly. Distinctive.

  Ariana opened her mouth to speak, but the only sound that escaped was a sort of dry, strangled cough. She

  pressed her palms against her seat to steady herself. But her hands were slick with sweat, and they slid from

  the vinyl surface.

  The girl lowered herself into Daniel's seat. "He's going to hurt you," she said simply.

  Her words sliced through Ariana like a sharpened blade. She studied the girl's face: the gray eyes, the smooth,

  pale skin, the glossy brown hair that tumbled around her shoulders. Despite her pretty face, the girl had a

  harder edge than most Easton students. She wore a leather bomber jacket and an old wool cap. A threadbare

  navy scarf peeked out from under her collar.

  Ariana steeled herself, faking nonchalance. Pretending that the very sight of this girl, the sound of her voice,

  didn't send chills down her spine. They both knew better.

  226

  "I can handle myself with Daniel," Ariana said.

  "I'm not talking about Daniel. I'm talking about Thomas." The girl laced her fingers together on the table and

  leaned forward. A red, angry cut ran the length of her right hand. "I'm starting to think you're not as smart as

  everyone says."

  "Thomas?" The room started to spin around her. She'd heard that voice before, but where? She tried

  desperately to place it. But her mind had gone blank with fear.

  "He's not who you think he is," the girl said quietly. "Even if he did make you pancakes or light candles to

  keep you warm at night." She was staring right through Ariana with those glassy gray eyes. "Even if he

  promises to keep your secrets."

  Ariana's mouth was completely dry, as if someone had filled it with sawdust. She tried to swallow but

  couldn't. What did this girl know? And how did she know it? Ariana raised her hand to the subway token

  again

  "Of course, I never made that promise." The girl chuckled to herself, flicking her hair over one shoulder.

  Ariana flinched. Was that a threat? Was this girl going to hurt her? Or worse, hurt Thomas? She cast a frantic

  glance toward the rest-rooms. Her first instinct was to search for Daniel. To find someone, anyone, who could

  protect her. But she stopped herself. Daniel could never, ever find out about this girl. She knew too much.

  More than too much. She knew everything.

  But how?

  "Don't bother," the girl said smoothly, without turning around. "I'll be gone before he gets back."

  227

  Ariana felt as if someone had bound and gagged her. She was mute, powerless. At the mercy of this stranger.

  She swallowed the thick lump in her throat.

  "Who are you?" she finally managed, her voice strained and unfamiliar. She was definitely no longer in

  control. She tried to fight the nausea that rose up in her stomach. This wasn't happening. It wasn't possible.

  The nightmare was supposed to be over, dealt with. "What do you want?"

  "It doesn't matter who I am. But what I want is Thomas," the girl snapped. Suddenly, her eyes were ablaze

  with light. It was as if the very mention of Thomas's name had brought her to life. Ariana clutched her own

  arm under the
table, held on for dear life. "And he used to want me. Everything was perfect. We loved each

  other. And then one day, he told me that he still loved me, but that things were too complicated between us."

  She blinked, her eyes boring through Ariana. "And then he found you."

  Ariana shook her head slowly. This girl wasn't making any sense. Sure, Thomas had a reputation on campus,

  a reputation for getting around. But this girl definitely wasn't an Easton student. Ariana didn't recognize her

  face. But that voice ...

  "I always knew I was going to get him back." A faint, faraway smile surfaced on the girl's lips. "You're just a

  blip. We were meant for each other."

  The girl was insane. "Thomas is with me now," Ariana said, trying to keep her voice level. She slipped her

  hand into her bag, and her fingers closed around a pen. "Not you."

  228

  "That's what you think," the girl said, laughing strangely. "But you're going to stay away from him. Unless

  you want your other boyfriend to find out about what you've been up to."

  Ariana said nothing, gripping the pen so tightly that her hand began to tingle, numbness slipping over it.

  "You remember, don't you? All those things you did. Things that I'm sure Daniel would be very interested in.

  The sex ..." The girl shook her head slowly. "The murder. That poor boy," she murmured. "The police would

  probably appreciate an anonymous tip as to exactly who he was with out on that lake and exactly how he

  'drowned.'"

  "How do you know all this?" Ariana's voice was barely audible.

  "I keep my eyes open," the girl replied. "Of course, it's completely up to you whether I go to the cops or not."

  The girl leaned across the table, her cold eyes just inches away. "Just remember-you're on thin ice. And, if

  memory serves, that's a dangerous place to be."

  She leaned back, laughing at her sick, twisted joke. As she stood up, she tugged a scarf out of her jacket collar

  with her cut-up hand and wound it around her neck. A dark navy argyle scarf.

  Ariana gasped, recognizing the fabric.

  "Stay away from him," she said under her breath, resting her hand on Ariana's shoulder. She squeezed tight,

  digging her nails into Ariana's skin. "I won't ask you again."

  And then she was gone.

  Ariana sank, lifeless, into the booth. Within seconds, the realization of what had just happened sank in. Her

  hands started to tremble,

  229

  then her arms, her legs, her feet. Soon, her entire body was shaking, racked with fear and guilt and shame.

  That girl had a dark navy argyle scarf. Just like in the picture of her and Thomas kissing in Daniel's room.

  The argyle material swam before her eyes as heat surged through her body. Sergei hadn't taken the picture of

  Ariana and Thomas. Now that she thought about it, the picture of her and Thomas kissing in Daniel's room

  hadn't even been on his camera. How could have she been so stupid? He hadn't been the one screwing with

  their minds, making Easton's campus a living hell.

  Suddenly, Ariana couldn't breathe. All she could hear were Sergei's pleas. Him asking her to help him.

  Begging her. Saw his eyes go blank as he sank beneath the surface of the lake.

  It hadn't been him. But he had died anyway. Murdered. Ariana had murdered him for no good reason.

  No. No, no, no.

  It had all been for nothing.

  She clawed at the neck of her sweater and fumbled for the water glass in front of her, knocking it clear off the

  table. The family at the counter turned to stare.

  In... two ... three ...

  Out... two ... three ...

  In ... two ...three ...

  Out... two ...three ...

  Just then, the waitress rushed over with napkins. "Are you okay, hon?"

  230

  "Fine. Thanks," Ariana lied. "I just remembered I have someplace to be." She had to get out of the diner.

  Now. Any second Daniel was going to return from the bathroom and catch her in the middle of this panic

  attack. She couldn't have that. She had to go. Ariana grabbed her coat and stumbled into the street. She

  gulped the winter air as if she were fighting to keep her head above water. As if she were about to get pulled

  beneath the surface again.

  Her world was starting to crumble. She could feel it. Everything she'd worked so hard to keep, everything she

  deserved, was slipping from her grasp. And she didn't know how to hold on any tighter.

  231

  THE TRUTH

  ***Ariana waited patiently in the dark of Thomas's room until he returned. After thinking for hours about

  what had happened at the diner, mulling it over and twisting it around, her brain had finally started to clear.

  Sergei was not her fault. That girl was responsible. She was there. She could have stopped Ariana. Could have

  told her Sergei was innocent. She was the one with Sergei's blood on her hands. Plus, Sergei had known

  about her and Thomas. Would always have been a threat. But those realizations didn't solve all of Ariana's

  problems.

  "Who is she?" she asked quietly when he opened the door. Pale light from the hallway leaked across the floor,

  illuminating tiny shards of jagged glass embedded in the floor planks. The broken Captain Morgan's bottle

  still sat on Thomas's desk. Reminding her.

  "What the-" Thomas flipped the light switch on the wall and whirled around. He collapsed against the door

  when he saw Ariana sitting cross-legged on his bed, still wearing her coat and scarf. "Jesus,

  232

  Ariana. You scared the crap out of me." He dropped his athletic bag and basketball next to the door, looking

  relieved. "What are you doing here?"

  "I asked you first. Who is she?" she repeated evenly, staring him down. Despite the fact that Ketlar was

  heated again, a slick cold crept over her skin.

  "Who's who? I don't know what you're talking about," he said, hovering nervously near the door.

  "So I'll refresh your memory," she said coolly. She had trusted Thomas like she'd never trusted anyone

  before. She had given him her virginity, and in return, he had hidden something from her. That was going to

  stop. Now. If they were going to get through this together, she had to know everything. "Tall brunette. Pretty.

  Says she loved you, and you dumped her without any warning." Emotion started to creep into her voice, and

  she swallowed it. This wasn't the time to let her feelings get in the way. Feelings only complicated things.

  Slowly, the color drained from Thomas's face. "I-I don't know who you're talking about."

  Liar."Wrong," Ariana said calmly, running her fingers over the worn plaid bedspread beneath her. "Try

  again." Her voice was flat. No hint of the rage that boiled inside her.

  "Ariana, I swear-"

  "Don't lie to me!" Ariana shouted, standing. Thomas took a step back "All right!" he whispered. "All right.

  Just keep it down."

  233

  Ariana crossed her arms over her chest and waited. Waited while Thomas ran his hands through his hair.

  Composed what he was going to say.

  "Her name is Melissa," he said weakly. He ambled across the room and slumped against his desk. "Mel

  Johnston. I dated her for a while this fall." He paused, glancing warily in Ariana's direction as he unbuttoned

  his coat and tossed it on his bed.

  Ariana was silent.

  "I met her through some of my friends at Easton High," he continued. "We went out for a few months and she

  got kinda cl
ingy, so I broke it off. No big deal. Please don't-"

  "When?" she asked icily. "When did you break it off?" The sound of Thomas begging only made her angrier.

  It made him seem weak.

  "I don't know." He stuffed his hands in his pockets and looked down at the floor, studying it as if seeing it for

  the very first time. "Maybe a month ago? She didn't take it too well, and I haven't heard from her since." He

  looked up at Ariana, a pleading gaze burning in his sapphire eyes. "Listen. It's over. I swear. I didn't tell you

  because I didn't think it was a big deal. I don't know why it's so important-"

  "Because she knows, Thomas!" Ariana exploded, lunging in his direction.

  "She knows everything!"

  He recoiled into his desk, knocking the broken bottle to the floor. The rest of it shattered, sending splintered

  pieces of glass to the far corners of the small room.

  "What?" Thomas's voice was thick with fear. "What the hell are you talking

  about?"

  234

  "She saw us together," Ariana spat, trying desperately to keep her voice down. If anyone heard her screaming

  and caught her in Thomas's room, they were screwed. "She knows we had sex. She knows about Sergei."

  Tears welled up in her eyes at the very sound of that name. "And she told me that if I didn't stay away from

  you, she was going to tell Daniel everything. She said she'd go to the police." The weight of the threat was

  palpable, heavy in the air. "The police, Thomas."

  "Oh my God." Thomas rubbed his face with both hands, exhaling slowly. "Okay. Give me a second to think."

  He jumped down from his desk, pacing back and forth in front of the bed. Head down. Glass crunched under

  his every step. "How did you ..." he started. "Where did she find you?"

  "In town."

  Ariana suddenly felt drained. Every last bit of strength had been sapped from her body. It took everything she

  had just to breathe. In and out. One breath at a time. She collapsed onto Thomas's bed, inhaling the scent of

  his pillow. But even his familiar smell couldn't comfort her now.

  Eyes closed, she took a deep breath and told him everything this Mel girl had said-except, of course, exactly

  how Sergei had died.

  "She's serious, Thomas," Ariana said quietly, wishing she could sink into the mattress and disappear. "I can

  tell."

  "Crazy bitch." Thomas stared at the floor for a while. "How the hell did she

  even know about us?"

  "I don't know, but she was following us all weekend," Ariana said. "I'm surprised she and Sergei didn't bump

  into each other in the-"

  235

  Suddenly the truth rushed in on Ariana. It hit her so hard her brain went foggy for a moment. But when it

  cleared again, she was sure. She knew exactly how Mel had found out about them.

  "The North Face store," she said quietly.

  "What?" Thomas said.

  "She was in the store that night. When I was shopping for Daniel and you ...surprised me," Ariana said, her

  heart pounding. "I remember her voice. You were about to kiss me and then-"

  Thomas's face lit with understanding.

  "Holy crap. She's the one who knocked into the rack and stopped us."

  "I knew I recognized her voice. She said she was sorry," Ariana said. "That must have been the first time she

  saw us."

  "How did you recognize her voice tonight, but I didn't even notice in the store?" Thomas asked.

  "I have a thing for details," Ariana said quickly. "Who cares? The question is,

  what are we going to do?"

  "I don't know. I don't know," Thomas said. Anger and panic were beginning to creep into his voice, and the

  glass crunched more loudly, more insistently under his feet as he crisscrossed the room. "If she tells, I'll lose

  everything. Easton, my inheritance." He stopped abruptly in front of his door and slammed his fist into it.

  "Thomas!" Ariana jumped off the bed and grabbed his arm before he could swing again. She ignored the

  small voice in the back of her mind telling her Thomas hadn't said he couldn't lose her. "Stop it!" She gripped