Breeder

by Marissa Farrar

  It didn’t make any difference to me where I was. Perhaps I’d regret that by the time my forty-eight hours was over, but right now I didn’t care. All I knew was that there was zero chance of me swallowing the meal they’d presented.

  The other Trads entered, Nadeusz and Mikotaj.

  “What’s happening here?” Nadeusz demanded.

  “She’s going to solitary for refusing to eat and insolence. Hopefully forty-eight hours in the hole will shake some sense into her.”

  I caught Nadeusz and Miko exchanging a glance.

  “She’s too close to her time,” Nadeusz argued. “She might go into labor while she’s down there.”

  “I’m sure she’ll let us know if that happens.”

  “I agree with Nadeusz,” Miko said. “The stress might harm the baby.”

  I didn’t know why they were fighting in my corner. It wasn’t as though they actually cared what happened to me. Then I realized they weren’t fighting for me, they were fighting for the precious Trad baby inside me.

  That seemed to make her pause, but I didn’t want to stay in here. Maybe I was punishing myself, or perhaps it was that I wanted to punish the child, even though, just like I’d never asked to be pregnant with it, it had never been asked to be conceived.

  “Polityk Borys won’t be happy if we lose any more,” Nadeusz said.

  I watched Rhett’s expression tighten at the mention of this new name. Who was Borys? What was a polityk? It seemed important, and from Rhett’s reaction, I figured he thought so, too. I hated to think of women dying, though. Was it happening during childbirth, or shortly after? The image of the creature I’d seen on screen flashed into my head, and I squeezed my eyes shut, trying to dispel it. While we might physically be able to carry a Trad baby, the birth might be something totally different. We were never designed by nature to push out something with a long, thick tail. Perhaps the scales were too rough as well, and the damage that was done during birth meant we bled to death?

  Kaja shook her head. “Rhetarz can keep a close eye on her. She’s strong and healthy. We won’t lose any more.”

  “Besides,” Kaja continued, “I can’t have her setting this bad example to the other girls. If I let her get away with this, what’s to say the others won’t do the same. They listen to her. We need to make an example of her.”

  Nadeusz pressed his lips together but nodded. Even so, I didn’t get the impression he was supporting this one hundred percent. I wondered what was holding him back. Did he really care about the Trad baby so much? Was he fiercely patriotic and was only focused on repopulating his precious planet? I wanted to paint these Trads as cold-hearted brutes, but every now and then I got a glimpse of something different beneath the surface.

  “Let’s try force-feeding her first,” he insisted. “If she throws it back up, then we can take her down to solitary.”

  I felt the eyes of the other women as my fate was discussed, the whispered voices and worried glances.

  “Fine,” Kaja finally relented. “But if she refuses to keep it down, she’s going straight to solitary.”

  The matron spun on her heels, her long, thick tail whipping around behind her as she stormed from the birthing ring.

  Miko moved closer to my pod and lowered his voice. “You don’t want to end up down there, Tara. I know right now this feels like things are as bad as they can get, but trust me when I say they can be worse.”

  I narrowed my eyes at him and shuffled as far away as I could get, considering my confinement. I couldn’t tell if he was trying to frighten me into cooperating or warn me. Though he appeared threatening, with the crazy hair and the tattoos, and piercings—and that was even before I focused on the horns and scales—there was something softer about his tone that made me feel like it was the latter.

  Movement came from the doorway, and he quickly stepped back again. Kaja reentered, with Rhett close behind. In one hand she held a clear tube, and in the other was some blended sludge in a jug. They were actually going to do this.

  I shot a glance over at Miko, who widened his eyes.

  “It’s okay,” I said, holding up my hands. “I’ll eat. You don’t have to do this.”

  A smile of victory crossed Kaja’s face. “You’ll want this then,” she said, handing me the jug.

  I wrinkled my nose and peered down into the slop. “What’s this?”

  “You don’t think I’m going to give you your regular food when you caused such problems for us? The next few meals, at least, will be blended for you, since you were having such trouble eating normally.”

  “I can eat normally,” I muttered.

  “Not for at least another day,” she replied, frustratingly bright. She’d won this round, and she knew it, and now I was going to have to eat slop for every meal until she decided otherwise.

  “Don’t I get a spoon or something?”

  “Spoons are for young ladies who know how to eat their meals without complaint.”

  I scowled at her, but I knew I’d never win, and I didn’t want to risk being pinned down and having a tube shoved down my throat. I hesitated and then lifted the lip of the jug to my mouth. I squeezed my eyes shut and tried not to inhale too deeply or think about what I was about to swallow. I knew there was nothing bad in the jug—it was only our regular meals blended together—but the head was a powerful tool when it comes to having control over our bodies, and my gag reflex went into overdrive. I remembered what they’d said about what would happen if I didn’t hold the food down, however, and somehow forced myself to swallow.

  I pulled a face. Perhaps the tube would be a better option, since then I wouldn’t have to taste how disgusting it was.

  Kaja watched, her eyes dancing with delight at my revulsion. “Keep going. I want every last drop gone.”

  I gritted my teeth but lifted the jug to my mouth again. I thought back to my favorite meals on Earth—fish tacos, with fresh guacamole, and spicy salsa, all chased down with a salt-rimmed margarita. My mouth watered at the thought, and I was able to ingest more of the poor excuse for a meal. Would I ever get to eat those kinds of foods again? I’d been the type of person to put hot sauce on everything, and if there were jalapenos, even better. There was so much I missed about my previous life.

  Lost in thought, I was surprised when I hit the bottom of the jug. My stomach gurgled uncomfortably, and the baby jabbed me from the inside. I guessed it was happy for the food, and probably wouldn’t have appreciated hot sauce and margaritas anyway.

  I stifled a burp with the back of my hand and gave the empty jug back to Kaja. She rewarded me with a smile, but it was masking gritted teeth and hard eyes. A part of her had wanted me to fail.

  “Same thing for lunch,” she said, “and dinner, too.”

  I returned the strained expression, the spark of fire reigniting inside me. “I’ll look forward to it.”

  Chapter Seven

  I opened my eyes to find the biggest of the Trads standing over me.

  True to her word, Kaja had brought me slop for both lunch and dinner. I’d forced each jug down, battling my gag reflex at every swallow, but determined I wouldn’t let her win. I’d been more than happy when the day was over, and I was able to go back to sleep again.

  But now I was instantly awake, scrambling away as fast as my swollen belly would allow. The restraints hardened at my sudden movement, jerking me back into place.

  “What do you want, Nadeusz?” I asked, my voice croaky. “Were you watching me sleep?”

  The thought creeped me out. How long had he been there?

  I quickly scanned the room, wondering if any of the other Trads were here. The other women were all sleeping, too, and I wondered why I’d been the one he’d decided to watch sleep.

  He fixed me with his gaze. Fire danced within his pupils, even in the dim light, flashes of reds, orange, and yellow. They were mesmerizing, and I had to make myself break the eye contact.

  “I brought you something,” he said in a low growl. “C
heck under your mattress.”

  “You...what?”

  But he didn’t answer my question, and instead turned away, his long, thick tail sweeping along behind him.

  I sat, frozen in one spot, watching his broad shoulders disappear out of the door, before exhaling a shaky sigh. Well, that was fucking weird. What did he mean by he’d brought me something?

  I couldn’t help feeling as though this was some kind of trap. Was it a test? Had he left something for any of the other women at all?

  Glancing around, I tried to make out the faces of those nearest. Perhaps they were faking being asleep? It was possible, but I didn’t want to risk calling out, just in case.

  The thought of there being something under the mattress wouldn’t leave my mind. What if it was important, and I was just ignoring it? But what the hell would a Trad give me that was important? It didn’t make sense.

  But it nagged at me, refusing to leave me alone, and I knew I wouldn’t be sleeping again until I fished it out and saw what it was. True, I might not be doing much sleeping after I discovered what Nadeusz had brought me, but at least my mind would be put to rest.

  I didn’t want anyone else to see what I was doing. I felt like Nadeusz might be watching me from somewhere as well, trying to see if I was going to check for what he’d left me.

  There weren’t many skills my previous life as a Las Vegas croupier offered me, but sleight of hand and deftness was one of them. I could spin a ball, and shuffle cards, and strip the deck. True, I didn’t have a pack of cards right now, but I was able to move nimbly, despite my size. My fingers were long and slender and dexterous, and I was able to reach down and slip my hand beneath the cushioning material of the mattress and feel around without moving my body too much. If Nadeusz wanted me to find whatever it was he’d left me, I assumed he wouldn’t have put it right down at the far end of the bed, making it difficult for me to reach. I stretched farther, my shoulder joint straining. I wished I could roll onto my stomach to get a different angle, but it would be like trying to lie on top of a beach ball.

  My fingers met with crunchy plastic, and I paused, frowning. What the hell was this? I pinched it between my thumb and forefinger and pulled the thing out. I didn’t know what I’d been expecting, but this certainly wasn’t it.

  I lifted the item to my nose and sniffed. Sweet pastry, and some kind of nuts and syrup.

  My stomach gurgled.

  Was this for real? Nadeusz had slipped me a snack? Why on earth would he do such a thing? Did he feel bad that I’d been fed nothing but slop over the past twenty-four hours? I had to admit the idea of putting something sweet and tasty in my mouth and actually chewing did appeal to me.

  I glanced around again, still convinced this was some kind of trap, but it didn’t look like anyone was paying attention to me. The other women all appeared to be sleeping, and the lights were dimmed, as was normal during the night. There weren’t any other Trads around, and even if there were, I didn’t think they’d be able to make out what I was doing in the dark.

  With my heart hammering, I quickly unwrapped the pastry. My mouth watered at the scent, and I lifted it up and took a tiny nibble of the corner. I had to stop myself from groaning with pleasure. It was sweet and flaky and buttery—or at least whatever the Tradrych version of butter was—and melted on my tongue.

  My body took over, and I crammed the rest of the pastry into my mouth without even thinking about it. I wolfed it down and then licked the crumbs off my fingers when I was done. I might have been craving Mexican food, but that came a close second.

  I caught a flicker of movement from the doorway—a set of unmistakably broad shoulders and jet-black hair. Nadeusz. Had he been watching me again? Making sure I was enjoying the treat he’d brought me?

  I had no idea what to make of some of the Trads.

  Were they my enemies or my allies?

  Chapter Eight

  Kaja was making her rounds, wheeling her trolley of equipment to each of us women and assessing the babies we were carrying. There were over thirty women, so the checks took up a lot of her time. She didn’t seem to care, however, taking delight, it seemed, in seeing the fetuses on screen, marveling at each of their tiny lives.

  I lay silent and still while she did her scans, making sure I couldn’t see the screen. Seeing the creature inside me once had been bad enough, and I didn’t want to go through the same thing again.

  “Everything is looking good. Won’t be long now.”

  She gave the back of my hand what I assumed was supposed to be a reassuring pat, but I snatched it away. I didn’t want her touching me.

  I ignored her as she continued to work her way around the women. There wasn’t much else I could do while Kaja was doing her work—it wasn’t as though I could even get away with whispering to the other women while she was in the room. I was still muddling over what was going on with the snack Nadeusz had sneaked under my mattress. I caught Miko watching me sometimes as well, something unreadable in his blue eyes.

  A sudden cry came from the other side of the room.

  Immediately, I assumed the sound had come from one of the other women, but as I sat up, I was surprised to discover Kaja on her feet, her hand pressed to her mouth. Her tail had wound around her body, as though it was either comforting or protecting her, though I had no idea from what.

  She stood beside Jennifer’s bed, staring at the screen in horror. Jennifer was pale and frozen in place, her gaze fixed on the equipment suspended above her swollen belly.

  “What did you do?” Kaja demanded of Jennifer, her tone frighteningly high-pitched. “What did you do to the baby?”

  Frantic, Jennifer shook her head. “Nothing. I didn’t do anything at all.”

  Kaja let out a wail. “You killed it! How could you? An innocent child!”

  Heavy footsteps came running toward us, and a couple of the male Trads hurried into the birthing ring.

  Jennifer’s eyes filled with tears. “I didn’t do anything. I promise. I had no idea.”

  Kaja ignored her and turned to Rhetarz and Zymunt instead. “She’s killed the baby. I can’t find a heartbeat. It’s dead inside her rotten womb.”

  Jennifer gave a wail of despair, though I didn’t know if it was fear of what was going to happen to her now, or the idea of having a dead Trad baby inside her. She covered her face with her hands and rocked back and forth while the most awful cries came from her mouth.

  I couldn’t sit here and watch in silence any longer. They weren’t doing anything to try to comfort her, but were throwing accusations and insults at her instead.

  “It’s not your fault, Jennifer,” I called out to the other woman. I scooted down to the end of my bed to try to make the distance between our pods smaller. “These things happen. You didn’t do anything wrong.”

  Kaja whipped around to face me. “Silence!”

  But I shook my head. “No. I won’t just sit here quietly while you accuse Jennifer of doing something she hasn’t. It’s bad enough that you’ve brought us here, and done this to us...” I gestured at my swollen belly. “But to accuse one of us of doing something she hasn’t while expecting the rest of us to keep quiet is a step too far.”

  The other women around me had been roused by my speech.

  “Yeah!” Avery shouted from the pod beside me. “We’re allowed to stand up for each other. You didn’t do this, Jennifer. Don’t listen to them.”

  “Be quiet!” Kaja screeched.

  On the other side of me, Dawn moved down to the end of her pod as well. “It’s not your fault, Jennifer,” she called out. “They’re the wrongdoers in all of this, not you.”

  Other voices joined in, picking up and repeating the things we’d said. “You didn’t do anything wrong.”

  “It’s not your fault.”

  “Don’t listen to her.”

  One by one, each of the women joined us.

  “Enough!” Rhetarz roared, bringing down his whip in a crack that was intended as a thr
eat to silence us all.

  But we wouldn’t be silenced. The sound of our joined voices filled the birthing ring, and Jennifer lifted her face from her hands, staring around at us all, calling our encouragement and support to her.

  Kaja turned her attention to me. “Make them stop!”

  But I shook my head and only lifted my voice higher. “We’re the victims. We’ve done nothing wrong.”

  Kaja’s eyes flamed with fury. “You’ll go down to the hole for this!”

  I didn’t care what my punishment would be. Whatever it was, I felt certain it wouldn’t be as bad as whatever Jennifer had ahead of her now. I knew we wouldn’t be able to stop her being taken away, but at least she’d go knowing that she had all of us behind her, if only in our hearts and minds.

  “I don’t care. You can’t put us all down there.”

  “Come on,” the matron commanded to the male Trads. “Get her up.”

  I didn’t even put up a fight as they released the bonds attaching me to the pod and rejoined them at my wrists. What was the point? Fighting wasn’t going to change the outcome for me. The women continued to call their support to Jennifer, and now shouts of ‘leave her alone’ were directed toward me. Maybe what we’d just done was only the tiniest of achievements, but it meant something, even if I was going to be punished for it.

  Rhett and Zymunt caught me up between them, each holding a different arm.

  Kaja jerked her chin toward the door. “Take her down to the hole. She’s had her last chance.”

  “Tara!” Avery’s cry came from behind me, but there was nothing I could do or say to make her feel better.

  They half carried me toward the exit, and I allowed them to, hanging loose in their grip.

  I was being taken out of the birthing ring for the first time, other than when we went outside to wash. Would I get some clue as to what had happened to the others out here? What had happened to Zoe?

  I remained limp in their grasp as they half dragged me down white corridors. The sound of the women’s voices grew fainter the farther away I was taken. I caught glimpses of other Trads, stepping out of doorways, heads down as they focused on data pads held in their hands. We received the occasional curious glance, but otherwise everyone ignored us. I guessed seeing a pregnant human female being dragged through these hallways wasn’t such an unusual sight for them. After all, I assumed we were the reason this whole facility had been built, and plenty of women had birthed their Trad babies by now.