Shielding You (Baytown Boys Book 13)

by Maryann Jordan

  Her lips pinched together, she inhaled deeply through her nose, then let it out slowly. “You’re right. I’ve been to the doctor and have no problem showing you proof that I’m pregnant. I’m ten weeks along and you were the only man I was with. It’s not like I’m asking you to fall in love with me or marry me after one night—”

  “Thank fuck for that,” he groused, still in disbelief at the change of circumstances.

  Ignoring his outburst, she plowed ahead. “But I’ve decided to keep the baby, and we’ll need to come to some financial arrangement. I’d like you to be involved in our baby’s life. One way or another, we need to talk.”

  As his world continued to tilt on its axis, he was barely aware she had stepped forward until she placed her hand on his arm. Unlike Hannah’s touch, he felt nothing but her cold, grasping fingers. He looked past her shoulder, but Hannah’s red taillights had long since disappeared, and his heart ached.

  3

  As soon as Hannah turned onto the main road of Seaside, she wished she’d taken one of the side streets to get to the police station. Going this way meant she would pass right by The Wharf Restaurant’s parking lot. It had been a month, but the memories of that night plagued her every second of each day. It was the last thing she thought of before finally falling into a fitful sleep and the first thing that hit her when her eyes blearily opened each morning.

  She tried telling herself that it didn’t matter, that she and Dylan were so new that her heart couldn’t possibly have been involved. But that was a lie. They may have only dated for two months, but in that time, she’d fallen in love.

  She had managed to avoid seeing him for the last month, not always an easy feat. Throwing herself into her work, she filled her days getting to know everyone in Easton as well as assisting Colt with some of the duties at the county jail. Desperate to not see Dylan and Melissa together, she never ate out and grocery shopped late at night.

  She pulled extra shifts and attended every town meeting, even those where her presence wasn’t required. The mayor and town council were thrilled with her dedication, and while speared with guilt that her reasons were selfish, she reaped the benefit when the small local newspaper ran an article on her, singing her praises. As soon as it hit the mailboxes of the residents, her standing in the community rose from let’s see how the woman chief does to one where she was greeted fondly every time she was seen.

  And the law enforcement leaders’ meeting had been postponed from last week, giving her another week’s reprieve before she had to be in Dylan’s presence.

  Of course, it both helped and hurt that no one knew they’d been dating. It helped that no one cast sympathetic gazes her way. But it also hurt when no one hid anything. She had to smile when she heard Pearl and one of her officers talking about seeing Dylan and a pretty blonde together. She pretended disinterest when hearing him referred to as a player. After a while, the pain lessened, and she began to see that perhaps their breakup was for the best.

  A real estate agent finally found a small cottage that was exactly what Hannah had envisioned, and she was ready to close the deal. That was the only thought that brought a smile to her face… knowing that in another week, she would be a homeowner.

  “I’ve got this,” she said out loud to no one but herself, glancing into her rearview mirror. “In fact, this is good. I should be my own woman, build up my own department, and find my own way. I’ve got a house to fix up and a career to focus on. To become involved with someone so soon after moving here and getting a job was a dumb mistake.”

  She’d been talking to herself a lot in the past month. It didn’t keep her from being lonely, but she’d never minded her own company. Now, pulling into the parking lot of the Seaside Police Station, she looked around to see what other vehicles were evident. Having convinced herself that she was better off without Dylan, she still didn’t want to go in and be alone with him. She was grateful to spot Colt’s, Liam’s, and Mitch’s vehicles.

  Squaring her shoulders and lifting her chin, she threw open the door and marched into the building. The overall effect would have been more impressive if her feet had not stumbled to a halt as soon as she saw him. Dylan’s hair was a little longer, still brushed to the side as though his fingers had taken the place of his comb. His hazel-green eyes immediately shot to hers, but instead of his signature quirk, his expression held sadness. Plastering a smile on her face, she walked forward and forced her gaze to shift from him over to the others.

  “Hey, Hannah,” the greetings rang out.

  “Good morning, everyone.” She moved to the counter to pour a cup of coffee, seeing where someone had set a cluster of mugs. Her hands shook slightly as she fixed her beverage, and she hoped no one was watching. Come on, Wyatt. Get here so we can get down to business.

  “I couldn’t believe it when I spied you with that blonde on three separate occasions,” Colt said. “I didn’t know you dated anyone more than once.”

  Knowing he was talking to Dylan, her back stiffened as she waited to see what his response would be.

  “Yeah, well, she’s an old… um… friend.”

  Laughing, Mitch jumped in. “I didn’t know you had any friends like her.”

  Her cheeks heated, and she was glad her back was still to the others. Considering their opinion about the women he slept with and how close she’d been to taking their relationship to that level, she inwardly cringed.

  It was hard to steady her breathing, and she blew out a sigh of relief when Wyatt hustled in, throwing out greetings. He headed straight to the counter and flashed her a big smile as he fixed his coffee. Forcing her lips to curve upward, she carried her mug to the table, glad the conversation had moved off Dylan. And Melissa. And how soon before they all know he’s going to be a father?

  Sitting down, she was unable to keep her gaze from drifting over to where Dylan sat across from her. He was staring, and she could have sworn his eyes were trying to convey a message, but she had no idea what it was.

  By the time the last item on the agenda was checked off and they’d discussed current cases that impacted each other, Mitch received a call that would keep him from going to lunch. Right after, Colt’s radio went off and he needed to leave as well.

  “I’ll head out, too,” she said. “We can all grab lunch next time.”

  “Hannah, can you stay a few minutes?” Dylan asked, drawing her surprised gaze to him. “I have a couple of items to go over with you.”

  Unable to think of a reason to decline, she smiled her goodbyes to the others as they left the room. Now, alone with Dylan, she once again tried to force a smile.

  His eyes held the same sadness she’d seen earlier. He swallowed deeply several times, his unease was palpable. He’s going to be a father… but it wasn’t the life plan he wanted. For a month, she’d thought of her own pain, but standing in front of her was a man hurting as well. Jesus, what a mess. Her mind roamed to what kind of father he’d be, and for an instant, her thoughts wandered down the path of imaging the two of them being together, expecting a child.

  He lifted his hand and swept his fingers through his hair. “I’ve tried to call… I… um, I guess I just wanted… hell, I don’t know.”

  He sounded so despondent, she fought the urge to reach out and touch him. Clearing her throat, she remained in place. “I thought it was best not to talk, Dylan. You have a lot going on, and to be honest, I felt you needed to focus on Melissa and the baby.”

  He winced at her words but nodded slowly. Letting out a long sigh, he added, “This is not the way I wanted things to go. I wanted to be with you—”

  The look of anguish on his face penetrated her shell. In front of her was not just a man who was dealing with the consequences of his actions but having to reconcile that those actions had changed the course of his whole life. She sucked in a breath that hitched, wanting to offer words of comfort, but held back. It wasn’t her place; he wasn’t hers.

  “Dylan, I’m not upset with you, I’m ups
et for you… for us.” As the words left her lips, his eyes searched hers as though trying to determine her meaning. Sighing, she felt some of the tension leave her shoulders. “You didn’t cheat on me. You were with Melissa before you were ever with me. I wanted more, but it’s just that life has now chosen a different path for us. We’ll be professional colleagues, and I can truthfully say I wish you the best.”

  He opened his mouth to say more, then closed it, sighing again. His gaze stayed on hers, and she forced herself to not look away. Finally, he sighed and nodded.

  She finally reached out and patted his arm, feeling the same electricity as always. “Be well.” With that, she turned and walked back out into the sunshine, her heart still heavy and yet now filled with a sense of relief. She was sorry that Dylan’s life had taken a turn he hadn’t planned on, but she was determined to take charge of her own life and career.

  With his hands still gripping the steering wheel even though the engine had been turned off, Dylan sat in his truck, parked to the side of the clinic. Stuck. If he had to choose one word to describe his life, it would be stuck. Stuck in a situation he did not want to be in. Stuck having to deal with a woman he did not trust. Stuck trying to force feelings that were not coming naturally. And stuck having to avoid the one person he wanted to be with.

  He lifted his eyes and glanced into the rearview mirror, not surprised at the reflection that stared back. He’d watched his reflection change over the past two months, and the change had not been good. His hair had grown longer until Barbara, his receptionist and dispatcher, finally cracked a joke about it, and he’d managed to make a quick trip to the barber. His uniform had been wrinkled several days in a row when he hadn’t remembered to take his pants and shirts to the cleaners, and more than a few whiskers had been missed on days when he just didn’t care enough to shave carefully.

  Every waking moment had been spent thinking about Melissa and the baby. And, of course, regrets about Hannah. He tried to pull up feelings of excitement about the baby, but it was hard. Actually, it wasn’t the baby as much as the mother. A one-night stand with a woman he’d just met in a bar. He was surprised he’d remembered her name.

  He had never spent much time thinking about babies. He’d figured that one day he’d find a woman he wanted to spend his life with and would fall into the natural rhythm of dating, marriage, and children. Hannah came to mind, slicing through his thoughts as well as piercing his heart. In the couple of months that they’d dated, he’d felt more for her than he’d ever felt for any other woman. He had never been in love before but had no doubt he’d fallen for Hannah. And then that was blown to hell.

  The few times he’d seen her she’d put on a good face, and he didn’t think any of their friends or colleagues knew she was hurting. But he looked into her eyes and saw pain, and it gutted him that he was the cause. He had no idea what she saw when she looked at him but was sure he wasn’t able to hide his sorrow.

  Marriage to Melissa was out of the question. He was not going to pledge his life to a woman that he still didn’t trust two months after finding out she was pregnant. But the baby would know his father. The baby would be financially cared for, and he would split custody with Melissa. While he might not feel anything toward her, he would not abandon his child. My child… but is it?

  Melissa had been avoiding the issue of her exact due date, creating more doubt in his mind, but he’d insisted on a paternity test. She wasn’t happy about it, but when he wouldn’t budge on offering financial assistance without proof the child was his, she’d given in.

  A movement toward the front door of the clinic caught his eye, and he watched as Melissa glanced around the parking lot before walking in. She was already in maternity clothing and he wondered why there was no baby bump showing. He waited to see if paternal feelings of love kicked in, and when they didn’t, wondered if something was wrong with him. While it might make him a bastard, he needed proof that the baby was his. If it was, he would alter his life and lifestyle to make sure his baby was taken care of and loved. I just need to be sure.

  Forcing his fingers to unwrap from around the steering wheel, he climbed from his truck and followed her into the clinic. She had checked in and was moving to a seat, her head snapping around toward him, a tight smile on her face.

  He had always possessed a keen bullshit meter. That particular trait came in handy with his chosen career in law enforcement. And he could swear that something was hidden behind her smile. Today, he was going to find out if his instincts were right.

  Dylan sat in his vehicle again, this time staring out the windshield at the little bungalow. Checking the address again, he swallowed deeply, a mixture of emotions rushing through his mind. He hadn’t seen Hannah since the Chiefs’ meeting several weeks ago and could only pray she’d talk to him… or at least listen to him.

  Wiping his hands on his jeans, he climbed down from behind the wheel and began walking up the pine-needle path toward the front porch.

  The front door opened before he reached the steps, and Hannah peered through the screen door, surprise written on her face. Wearing yoga pants and a green t-shirt, she looked comfortable in bare feet. Her hair was down, the way he’d always liked it, flowing about her shoulders. Her face was just as breathtakingly beautiful as he remembered.

  Opening the screen door, she came out onto the porch, her hand easing the door shut behind her. Brow furrowed, her eyes roamed over him. “Dylan? Are you okay?”

  Suddenly unsure, he shoved his hands into his pockets. “Uh, yeah. I… I had some news and wanted to… well, you were the first person I wanted to tell… uh… if you’ve got time…”

  She stared for a long, silent moment, her gaze assessing him, and he prepared to beg if necessary. Finally, she inclined her head toward one of the rockers on the front porch, and while it wasn’t the same as her inviting him inside, he was grateful for the chance she was giving him. They settled into the chairs, and she planted one foot onto the seat, wrapping her arms around her bent knee. Slowly rocking, she gave him her attention. Now that he was there, all the words he wanted to say seemed jumbled.

  “I can tell there’s a lot on your mind,” she prodded.

  Her soft voice soothed over him, and he’d missed hearing it, letting it seep deep inside. He nodded, then leaned forward and propped his forearms onto his knees, clasping his hands together. “I’m not sure where to start.”

  “Wherever it feels right.”

  “I feel like I should start at the beginning, but honestly, I guess I’ll jump into the middle.” He turned his head and held her gaze, wanting to see her expression. “Melissa’s baby isn’t mine.”

  Her eyes widened and she gasped, and he remembered the last time he’d heard that sound. It was standing in the restaurant parking lot, hearing Melissa declare that she was pregnant with his child. Wishing he could erase that event, he hurried to explain. “I was suspicious right from the beginning. I had used a condom… I always use a condom. And hadn’t noticed a problem with it, but I know they’re not infallible.” She remained quiet, and he hoped that was a good sign.

  “Anyway, I know it probably doesn’t matter, but I feel like I need to explain.” He stared into her beautiful face and said, “I was never a great student, but I was a decent athlete in high school. That was all it took to impress girls when I was a teenager, and I’ll admit that I let it go to my head. Four years in the military, and I wasn’t much more discerning as an adult. Honest to God, I was never a player. I never met anyone that I was interested in having a relationship with, but I never played a woman. I also never slept around nearly as much as most people assume, but I never disavowed them of the notion. Guess I thought it made me sound like a big deal, which is fuckin’ stupid.”

  The rocking chairs had been slightly angled toward each other, but now he scooted around so that he was facing her. “Until I met you, Hannah, I never met any woman that I wanted to spend time with. You were different. You were everything.”


  Her lips curved slightly, but her eyes gave nothing away. He had no idea what she was thinking. Finally, she prodded, “What happened with the baby?”

  He scrubbed his hand over his face, fatigue weighing on him. “I wish I could say I was excited at the prospect of fatherhood, but considering she was a one night stand with someone I met at a bar who was only passing through town, meaning I wouldn't have to see her again… well, the idea of being connected to her even though a child was not what I wanted. And, like I said, I was suspicious.”

  “Suspicious?”

  “Look, I don’t know a lot about pregnancies, but she said she was already ten weeks along. Which, of course, made it exactly at the time I’d been with her. I asked her when she realized she was pregnant, and she was evasive. Said her periods were irregular, and she hadn’t noticed she was late. Then, she said it took her a while to find me. Hell, she knew I was from this town, and Seaside isn’t exactly a metropolis.”

  He battled back the anger that he always felt when he thought about Melissa, not wanting that emotion to erupt. Sucking in a deep breath, he let it out slowly, forcing his heartbeat to steady. “She immediately said that she wanted financial assistance and wanted me to be involved. When I asked about a paternity test, she became defensive. The past seven weeks have been pretty horrible. I hadn’t even told my family yet, but I knew that was coming. She was pushing for it, but I was insisting on the test first.”

  “What happened?”

  “We finally went to have the blood draw to determine paternity and discovered that instead of being seventeen weeks pregnant, she was only twelve.”

  At this, Hannah gasped again, her eyes jerking open even wider. “Twelve? But… but… how…”