Fractured Fairy Tales: A SaSS Anthology

by Amy Marie

  “No, father,” she responds, resignation alighting in her voice.

  When her father walks out of the room, I get a clear picture of her face.

  It’s my great-great-great-grandmother. The one who wrote the journals that told me my great-great-great-grandfather raped this woman who, apparently it seems, he so clearly loved.

  “Oh, I’ll raise this child, father, but you stop me from telling a different story altogether.”

  With that, she grabs a leather-bound journal and starts writing.

  It’s the journal that was found amongst the treasures my ancestors had left behind. The journal that no one but me had ever known existed.

  “Dear Diary, Robert bought himself a sexual slave. He’s raped this poor woman repeatedly. Now, she is pregnant with his child. Robert is being sent back to England as payment for his sins, and I will raise the child as my own. Neither Robert nor his slave will ever see or hear again of this child, and they will learn from my writings how horrible this man truly was.”

  She speaks out loud as she continues to write. I’m floored by everything that she’s made up about my past, my ancestors, and my history.

  I truly believed all she had to say. I was ashamed of my heritage. Now, I’m truly ashamed. Not ashamed of Robert, and definitely not ashamed of Noaka. But of Catherine and her father and all they did to destroy a love that didn’t see lines or color or race.

  What is wrong with modern society today was wrong even back then. It may have been hidden a little better, but it’s clear as day to me now, that it was alive and well centuries ago.

  Several months flash by our faces, colors floating around us like the winds.

  We watch as Noaka grows with the child. We not only see, but I can feel in the heart of me how much she loves the child she is carrying. I feel her love grow each day she is pregnant. I feel the sadness she is enduring for the sacrifice she will need to make.

  It’s all playing in front of me like a sad movie, one you want to stop watching or rewrite the script so that the people who deserve their happy ending get it.

  But I can’t do anything. This is my history, and I’m here to watch it unfold to learn the truth.

  We are brought back to Catherine and her children. Five little girls who look almost exactly alike but differ in age. If I were to guess, I’d say they range from three to ten years old. Seems like they tried many times to have a son and kept having daughters.

  You can’t blame Catherine for that though, so I can’t understand why her father would have said something so hateful to her. The sex of your child isn’t something you can choose. It’s natural. It just happens.

  She doesn’t seem sad, though, she seems happy. She appears to be a good mother and is very attentive to her children. She does love them, and from my understanding, unless it was also a lie, she grew to love the child who was created by Noaka and Robert.

  Colors flash once again, taking us back to Noaka.

  It appears she’s in pain, there are many women surrounding her, seemingly chanting.

  When we look closer, it appears she’s not just in pain, she’s in the process of giving birth.

  “Please, don’t leave me,” she cries, holding onto her stomach. “You can’t come out, if you do, they will take you from me. Please, stay inside where I will keep you safe.”

  I know I’m a man, but the pain I see and feel coming from Noaka nearly brings me to my knees. I faintly hear Johnnie crying near me. Although this is my dream, and my ancestry coming to light, I know she’s feeling the emotions just as I am.

  “Noaka, my daughter, you can’t not give birth to your child. I know you love him as I will always love him, but our tribe needs you to make this sacrifice. You must do the right thing and honor the treaty we have made.”

  I want to grab her father and punch him directly in the face. How is it that this baby will make such a difference? Both my great-great-great-grandparents have already given up so much by not having one another in their lives and not having their love with them.

  Chapter 9

  Johnnie

  As I listen to the pleading coming from Noaka, my heart bleeds. Her father, the Chief is asking too much of her. I could never imagine having to give up my child after growing and loving them for so long. Not by my choice, anyway. I know if there were circumstances beyond my control, and the right thing was to give up my child, I would do it. But it would be for the child, their safety, their future, not because of an obligation.

  “Please, father,” Noaka cries once again and my heart is shattering for her.

  How did Smith not know this about his past? That’s a question I will ask when we come out of the past. I think he may need as much clarification as I do right now. The vibe I feel from him at this moment is that he was not aware of the sacrifices of his ancestors.

  The story he originally told me was not one of sacrifice, but one of slavery and evil doings. The story we are watching before our eyes does not depict even close to what he seems to have known.

  “Daughter, you have to push,” I hear a woman say from behind Noaka. This must be her mother. Tears are streaming down the woman’s face as fast as the ones are coming down her daughters.

  “Mother, please,” Noaka pleads. “Tell him we can’t do this.”

  “Ahote, you must leave the quarters now,” Noaka’s mother says to the Chief. “It is not allowed for you to see the birth, you must leave us be.”

  “I will turn my head, but I will not leave,” the Chief responds. “I must make sure the child is delivered safely then I must take him to the woman who will raise him. You cannot hold him, Noaka, you must let me take him immediately. It will hurt you more than you are already hurting, and this is not something I will allow.”

  “Father, please,” Noaka sobs.

  I am sobbing right along with her right now.

  When I look up to see the Chief’s face, I see that this is as hard on him as it is the rest of his people. When a lone tear rolls down his face, I have to look away. I want to hate this man for what he is putting his daughter through, but I feel his pain as much as the others and I can’t.

  Next thing I know, we hear a baby cry. Right along with that cry, however, comes a wail never heard before from Noaka. This doesn’t sound like a crying wail, more like a war cry, like she’s getting ready to battle.

  “Please, Mother, let me at least see him once,” she tries to ask once again.

  My heart is breaking so much witnessing the pain of Smith’s past. I feel like I’m invading something I should have never been witness to.

  “Nonsense, daughter,” Ahote says angrily, turning back around to keep watch over what is happening. “Bring me the child.”

  “Father, please, I am begging you, one last time.”

  “Noaka, my only child, my beautiful daughter, you’ve brought this on yourself. If you had come to us and not snuck around with the westerner, we would’ve been more prepared. We could have made this work, but you didn’t. Don’t think you’re the only one suffering. This child is my only grandson and could have become Chief like me and ruled over our people. Who knows what he could have taught or where he could have led our people? We are a small tribe, very few of us remain, and now we will again be one less. We will not ever see this child. He will never know his birthright. I’ll allow you to say goodbye, but I will not allow you to see him, Noaka. I must take him now to the people who have promised to protect us after the sins you and this man committed.”

  Heart-wrenching sobs break from the woman. A pain so strong I feel it down to my bones. Not one woman here assisting with the birth of this child is left without tears as they watch the Chief disappear out of their abode with their prince—their future.

  “I swear and bring forth all the spirits and curse this tribe to never feel peace again,” Noaka states, a tone to her voice we’ve never heard before. One that sends chills down my spine.

  “Daughter,” her mother gasps. “Stop, please don’t finish w
hat you are saying.”

  “Until the day my son is returned to this tribe, they will never see a day of peace again. The only thing that will bring peace back to our land and to our people will be the wedding of my son to the great Pocahontas. When the tribes become one, peace will be restored amongst our people. Until then, everyone will suffer as I have. This, spirits among us, is my vow, and I implore you to receive it and honor me.”

  When Noaka finishes her statement, her vow, her curse, a sense of peace seems to overcome her. She shifts her eyes all around the room. Her gaze touching every woman who surrounds her.

  “You will not bear any more children to this tribe,” she tells them. “Now, you can all live with the consequences of stealing my love and stealing my child.”

  I see her inhale a huge breath and then lay back and close her eyes.

  “Noaka!” her mother screams, so loud, I think everyone in the tribe not just in this abode could hear her. “No!”

  As I’m standing here, wondering why her mother is even more distraught than she was when the baby was taken, I look back to her and see that her last breath was her final one. She’s gone, she’s left the plane of existence, and with it, the ability to breed from her tribe.

  “Noaka, please, don’t go,” her mother lays on her chest and cries. “Please, baby, don’t leave us. Not like this.”

  “What is going on in here?” Ahote asks, barreling back into the home, the child no longer in his arms.

  “You,” Noaka’s mother screams and gets up. “You’ve taken not only our grandchild but our only child from us, look what you have done.” She points to Noaka’s still body then starts punching on the big man’s chest.

  “Noaka,” Ahote says on a whisper and falls to his knees. “What have I done?”

  Chapter 10

  Smith

  I can’t believe everything I’ve seen and experienced here.

  I don’t want to think it all to be true. I know in my heart and soul that it has to be, but it’s so hard to comprehend the pain and suffering my family went through.

  Now, I see the Native American side of my family so much clearer. I hurt for them all and wished it all to be untrue.

  I feel stirring behind me and start to come back to the present.

  I’d love more than anything to keep going down this journey of my ancestors, but I was here for a reason and now that reason has come to light.

  “Smith,” I feel Johnnie gasp behind me. I turn to her and pull her into my arms. This pain she’s experiencing from seeing my story just about guts me. She’s feeling this as if it happened to her.

  “I get it, let it out,” I tell her. I have to let her have this pain. I can’t express all of mine just yet, and I feel this is the right thing to do.

  “I’m so sorry,” she says to me. She’s got nothing to be sorry for, she didn’t do anything. The only thing she’s guilty of is having to relive this pain and suffering the same way I did.

  “No, please don’t apologize,” I tell her. I don’t want apologies, at least not from her. If I could go back and get anyone to apologize, it would be the father of the woman who made this family suffer so dearly. All because her husband fell in love with a woman who loved him back. All because they created a child out of that love.

  “Young ones, come with me,” Elder Lacy tells us. I didn’t even realize she was back in the room.

  I get up and help Matoaka rise. Why did I start referring to her by that name?

  We follow the elder woman through her home and out the back. She has another fire pit set up and there are a lot more people surrounding it.

  “Please sit, and we will explain,” she tells us.

  Johnnie and I each take a seat and wait to hear what is to be said.

  “It has been told through the ages,” an older man begins. It appears that he may be the leader as he is sitting up much higher and much more regal than the others. “There was a tribe, the Oaka tribe that populated in the lands to the east. They were a great tribe but when the first settlers came to the states, they were overtaken. Few remained and the tribe was trying to rebuild as our tribe has been trying to through the years. The Chief of this tribe had one solo heir, a daughter. This daughter fell in love with one of the westerners and had a child. I believe that is what you and our young Pocahontas just experienced. We had to put you under to see if you were who we thought you to be. When our Pocahontas here came to us with your story, Elder Lacy had a vision that you were the one person that could save not only us but to bring your tribe back to life. It was said that the only son left of the tribe was to marry Pocahontas and the tribe and their honor would be restored.”

  “Marry,” I exclaim, shock clearly in my voice. “How do you expect me to marry someone I do not know? You’re crazy.”

  I start to get up, but Johnnie’s hand grabs mine. I look into her eyes and she’s silently pleading with me to stay. Something inside me wants to make her happy, so I sit back down.

  “If these were times like they were centuries ago, you’d be obligated to marry our princess right now,” the man tells me with authority lining his voice. “But times are different, and we no longer believe in forced marriages or marriages to bring the tribes peace and harmony. This is and always will be your choice. All we ask of you, right here and now, is to consider what honor you will bring to us all. For centuries, tribes have sought you out. You are the son of the great Noaka. Our princess here is the descendent daughter of the great Amonute, or Pocahontas as you may call her. It is destiny that brought you together, we all here believe that. Now, you can go and decide for yourself.”

  I listen to the man’s words and am shocked to hear any of it. I mean, I’m the son of Noah and Jasmine, not of Noaka. I’m a descendant of the woman, the only descendant from what I understand, but I am not her son.

  “I see confusion,” the elder says. “It is said that we are the children of our ancestors. Although we have a mother and a father and uncles and aunts and all the like, we are the children of the great ones who were here before. Don’t let yourself get confused. I promise, the more you get to know of your heritage, the more you will understand. Matoaka, you are to go with the young man to his home. You are given a pardon on your solitude to help him understand the ways of our people. Help him understand why you were brought together. You are an intelligent one and you are the princess, you will be allowed to help him. You and only you can bring him to light and help him see that this is what he is destined to do.”

  “Yes, Elder,” Johnnie agrees then turns to look at the older man. “Chief, please confirm you’re behind this, I do not want to disrespect my elder, but you are the one we must answer to. Do you give me permission to help Smith here learn his destiny?”

  “Go,” he answers immediately. “Teach him, make him see, then if the two of you return together, you will marry. He will not return if he does not intend to honor his ancestors.”

  “Come with me,” Johnnie says and holds her hand out to me as she stands.

  I’m a bit dumbfounded by all that is going on, so I follow her blindly. She leads us into another abode. Looking around, I think this is where she resides. I’m too lost to speak just yet, so I wait as she grabs a bag and starts packing a few things.

  Chapter 11

  Matoaka

  Smith’s demeanor has changed so much in the past few hours. I feel his pain and the separation emanating from his pores.

  He’s feeling betrayed, and I understand that one hundred percent. His ancestors lied about how he came to be and now he must find a way to comprehend his new reality.

  I will take as much time as he needs to explain it all to him, should he need me to remind him of all we saw and to point out things he may have missed.

  I pack a bag to last me a few weeks. I will stay with him, at his home, until he can decide what he feels is right.

  I accept my path as I have been taught to do with the many years I’ve been a part of my tribe. We all know that we must f
ollow wherever destiny may lead us.

  It’s not so easy for someone who has not lived their life believing in fate and destiny.

  My job now is to help the person I am fated to spend the rest of my days with. I need to help him understand his destiny.

  I believe our forefathers had a reason to bring us together.

  I’ve felt a pull to this man from the first time I saw him in the forest. I’m sure once I can get him to understand himself, he will find that he has felt the same. If he didn’t, how was he able to find me standing there in the trees. I had been there a while, watching them. No one else but Smith saw me.

  “I’m ready,” I say to him, apparently startling him out of his thoughts.

  “Okay,” is all he responds as he begins to walk the way we came in.

  “Smith,” I call out, desperate to reach him. “It’s going to be okay. I promise you. I will stay with you, in your home, and help you to understand.”

  “She lied,” he whispers, looking me directly in the eyes, seeking out peace in my soul.

  The pain in his voice is more than evident.

  “We can talk about it when we get to your home,” I answer. We must start this journey of understanding in his home where he feels comfortable. Starting it in a place that’s strange won’t lead to the acceptance he needs to have. He needs the comfort of the things he knows surrounding him. He needs the security and stability of his own belongings to ground him to who he is while discovering who he is supposed to be.

  “I’m sorry,” he apologizes.

  “No, don’t,” I immediately respond. “There is no apology needed. This is all new to you. It changes everything you’ve grown up to know. Now, you must manipulate your mind to a different reality. It’s going to be difficult, painful even, but we will work through all of it together. I promise you. If when all is said and done, you decide not to follow this destiny, I will accept it and walk away. Let’s get you home so we can walk this road together and learn more about who we are and who we could be.”