The Blue King Murders

by Tom Shepherd

  “About what?” Parvati gently slipped her fingers down his neck, over his muscular chest, and gently grasped his arm. “We are quite alone here, Jeremiah. Please speak your mind.”

  “Uh…Would you…would you be willing to accept new programming?” J.B. said, suddenly businesslike. “In courtroom law?”

  Her mouth dropped open. “Are you asking me to become a Star Lawyer, or your legal secretary, or something else?”

  “We need more attorneys.” He backed away from her intimate reach.

  “Really?”

  “Yes, really,” he insisted. “The way you dismissed Lady Kalilee after she showed displeasure in defending Uncle Charlie—well, that indicates you have special skills. A legal aptitude, which only needs a stimulating learning environment to flourish.”

  Parvati smiled coquettishly. “Is that all you want to stimulate—my legal aptitude?”

  He ignored her question. “We’ll download a full legal education, after which I’ll give you private lessons in courtroom tactics and—”

  She crossed her arms and shivered again. “Do you find me at all attractive?”

  “Well, of course,” he said matter-of-factly. “And good looks can be a useful tool in the hands of a competent attorney.”

  She bristled. “So, to you I am just a useful tool with special skills?”

  “No, no, of course not. You’re a self-aware, AI entity.”

  “Who is also very pretty?” She turned slightly away from him.

  “Yes, you are. Did I say something wrong?”

  “Perhaps I heard you incorrectly.” She slipped the shawl over her head, covering the black tresses. “I assumed you wanted to educate me so we could spend more time together.”

  J.B. nodded vigorously. “That will be a nice by-product of our professional collaboration, yes.”

  “By-product?”

  “I said something wrong again, didn’t I?”

  She faced him, this time with a tone unlike J.B. had ever heard from her before. “Will our collaboration include sharing a bed?”

  “Uh… I didn’t…”

  “Special skills, indeed. You can train me to be a good lawyer, but I’m already a Ph.D. in coitus. I want to give you pleasure, to teach you the arts of love.”

  “When you were… Did… did you enjoy—no, forgive me. I don’t want to know.”

  “Did I enjoy being a provider?”

  “A what?”

  “A whore, Jeremiah.”

  “I would never call you—”

  “Yes, I did enjoy it. And I was good at my craft, ” she said. “Instructing men and women in sexual competence is fundamental to my programming.”

  “This is so not like me. I was a Catholic monk, for God’s sake.”

  “We Hindus have gods and goddesses who exist to bring us sensuality. One is called Rati, the goddess of desire, lust, passion. And yes, love.”

  J.B. shook his head. “I can’t believe this is happening to me.”

  “Are you still a monk?”

  He smiled sheepishly. “No.”

  “Good, because I am no longer a whore.”

  “Of course not. I’m glad. Sorry.”

  Parvati laughed sweetly. “Jeremiah, in some matters, you are so very shy. I find that alluring.”

  “I have no idea why.”

  She took his hands. “I will be a Star Lawyer, if we can find time for other delights. Do you want me to be your mistress?”

  “I’d like that very much.” He shivered, not from the cold air of sunrise. “I am no good at this.”

  “Let me teach you, beloved.” Parvati embraced J.B. and pressed her breasts against his chest and they kissed for the first time.

  “How was that?” he said softly.

  “Excellent.” She kissed him again. “All you must do is release, let go. The gods have given your body the wisdom it needs to perform the dance of love. I will teach you many new steps.”

  “You are so exquisite. I’ve never held a woman as perfect as you.”

  “Let’s return to the ship, so we can explore each other properly. Body to body, soul to soul. Man and woman. Good Catholic, good Hindu.”

  “First we’ll launch the Beagle and head back to Annistyn. I’ll turn the ship over to Arabella, and we can reconvene in my quarters for my first—uh—lesson? If that’s okay with you.”

  Her smile widened. “Promise to lose yourself in my dance?”

  “I will eagerly embrace your… curriculum?”

  They laughed together and left the taxiway in the early morning light for the rows of parked starships, arms around each other like they were already lovers. Near the Legal Beagle, J.B. allowed himself a final, silent prayer for Uncle Charlie, but tacked on a cry of hope for this new relationship.

  “St. Jude the Apostle, keep my rambunctious uncle out of trouble,” he prayed silently. “And make me an adequate dance partner for Parvati.”

  It was a prayer to the Patron Saint of Lost Causes.

  Twenty-Two

  When court resumed, Chief Prosecutor Yerzail Kamariikaaa attempted to call his next witness, but Tyler objected before his adversary spoke a word. Judge Felizool thumped the benchtop. Every holo-camera focused on the old purple jurist, who frowned like a stone demon guarding an ancient temple.

  “Mr. Matthews, you are a corrosive ingredient in the good chemistry of Quirt-Thymean justice. And a vexation to my spirit.”

  “I am a defense attorney, Your Honor. That’s my job description.”

  Felizool sighed deeply. “What is your objection now?”

  “Gender bias. The Prosecutor has no females on his staff.”

  “I am not required to have any female attorneys!” Yerzail said.

  “You represent the whole Quirt-Thyme Empire, yet you wave your hand and dismiss half the population so easily?” Tyler said.

  “Your Honor, this Terran is stalling, because he knows Prince Zenna-Zenn is guilty, and his defender will be executed beside him.”

  “The Chief Prosecutor suggests I don’t want to die. I will stipulate to that point, but—”

  “Lord Yerzail, your next witness?” the Judge said.

  “Our late Emperor Bandu’s Second Wife, Queen Leola Rhautina.”

  “Do you have any objections to this witness, Mr. Matthews?”

  Tyler shrugged. “Only to wish the Empire could find a qualified female attorney to question Queen number two on direct.”

  “Proceed, Yerzail,” Felizool ordered.

  Once more, a younger prosecutor stood and raised the cry for his superior. “Call her Most Gracious Majesty, Second Queen Leola Rhautina.”

  Tyler turned in his seat, expecting the same dramatic entrance as Veraposta. Instead, halfway from the entrance a pale purple female stood up. She wore a dark blue, hooded robe over simple lavender sheath dress. Queen Leola pushed back the head covering to reveal long brunette hair with golden highlights, then proceeded toward the arena of testimony, beyond the bar and below the bench.

  “She’s not blue—she’s Thymean?” Tyler whispered to Zenna.

  “Yes, Tyler Matthews.”

  “I thought only purebred blue Quirts qualified for the royal harem.”

  “Leola Rhautina is three-quarters Quirt,” Zenna said. “Her Great-grandfather, Emperor Synodiah, chose a Thymean princess of their first tier nobility as his fourth wife.”

  “Four wives, Indigo? I thought you guys were limited to three.”

  Mr. Blue shrugged. “As Counselor Frost says, it’s good to be king.”

  “By marrying a distant Thymean cousin, Bandu-Jeewan showed his political smarts,” Lovey added. “Leola Rhautina descends from both royal bloodlines. She unites the major races of the Empire.”

  Leola was slender, not busty and voluptuous like her full-Quirt Sister-Wife Veraposta, but athletic, shapely, and desperately attractive. Not counting his fiancé, and making allowances for the Quirt-Thymean puppy ears, Leola was probably the most beautiful humanoid Tyler had ever seen.


  Her complexion resembled the soft petals of mauve orchids, accentuated by rich brown, shoulder length hair streaked with gold. She had a triangular face set off by a broad nose, full lips and dimpled chin, and bright blue eyes, so vivid and clear they reminded him of Suzie.

  All eyes in the room—trillions more on distant worlds—followed her down the aisle toward the witness well. She moved without the flowing grace of the High Queen, but the friendly bounce of an ordinary woman walking in the park. Her presence conjured the spirit of attainable perfection. I am lovely, and so are you. Leola selected a standing place clearly on the prosecution’s side of the well. She took a moment to survey the crowded gallery, then nodded serenely, as if to remind the courtroom—Here also comes before you a Queen.

  Perhaps it was imagination, or male ego, or wishful thinking, but for a fleeting instant Tyler felt like Leola Rhautina turned her face ever-so-slightly and smiled at him. Just him. Then she resumed a demeanor of queenly detachment.

  Yerzail approached her deferentially and gazed at the floor when he asked the first questions. “Magnificent Highness, may I inquire whether you were present at the assassination of your husband, King Bandu?”

  “You may.”

  Yerzail blinked. “Uh—were you present that night?” he rephrased.

  “I was.”

  Tyler leaned to Lovey. “Answering only what she was asked. This chick has studied law.”

  “Not according to pretrial research. Before marrying Bandu, Leola was an exo-linguist.” Frost’s gaze never moved from the beautiful royal witness. “She’s no bimbo. Look at the cunning in those baby blues.”

  Yerzail heaved a sigh of bereavement. “Beloved Queen, your devoted subjects know how much you have suffered. But I must ask you to please describe the events you witnessed that terrible night, years ago.”

  Tyler grunted softly. Here it comes. Break out the hankies.

  “I found my Sister-Queen crying over the scorched remains of our dear Husband, High King Bandu-Jeewan. Zenna-Zenn had already fled with his First Wife, the Terran known as Yumiko Matsuda.”

  “Were you able to comfort your Sister-Queen after the traitor Zenna-Zenn murdered him?”

  “Yes. We had both lost a husband. We wept together.”

  Tyler leaped up. “Objection. How does she know Zenna and Yumiko were present at the crime scene, since they were gone before she arrived?”

  “Let’s ask her,” Judge Felizool said. “My Queen?”

  “I know because Veraposta, my beloved Sister-Queen, told me.”

  “Objection overruled.”

  “Another objection!” Tyler crossed to the bench. “Queen Leola didn’t see Zenna and Yumiko. She was told they had been there by a third party. That is hearsay.”

  Felizool shook his head. “In the Quirt-Thyme Empire, when a member of the royalty reports what another person has said, that is admissible testimony. Overruled. Go sit down, Mr. Matthews.”

  Yerzail continued. “And you are certain Prince Zenna-Zenn foully murdered his Sovereign with a rifle blaster?”

  “I am.”

  “Why are you so convinced?” Yerzail said.

  “The High Queen told me,” Leola said. “And the only alternative is unthinkable.”

  Yerzail moved on. “Would you tell us about—”

  “Wait a minute, Your Honor,” Tyler protested. “Shouldn’t we hear the ‘unthinkable’ alternative Queen Leola just mentioned?”

  “I object!” Yerzail said.

  Felizool pursed his dark lips. “No, I would like to hear the answer. Highness, would you respond, please?”

  Queen Leola wiped a tear from the corner of her azure eyes. “The only alternative is that my dear Sister-Queen, Veraposta herself, killed our husband. That is quite unthinkable.”

  “Mr. Chief Prosecutor, aren’t you going to ask where Queen Leola was when she learned of the alleged murder?” Tyler said.

  “I shall ask the questions as I see fit,” Yerzail sneered. “Did the Judge not order you to be seated?”

  “This is a new objection.”

  Judge Felizool threw up his hands. “Queen Leola, please satisfy the curiosity of Mr. Matthews. Where were you?”

  “In my chambers,” Leola said unflappably. “Down the corridor from the First Queen’s bedroom.”

  “And how did you learn of the Emperor’s death?” Tyler said.

  “Your Honor!” Yerzail roared. “This is my witness on direct examination, please.”

  “I’ll allow this one last interrogatory incursion, Mr. Matthews, then you will sit down and behave yourself, or the Court Police will make Counselor Frost the lead defense attorney by default.”

  Tyler threw up his hands. “I thought women couldn’t be lead counsel here.”

  “Mr. Matthews! Ask your question and sit down.”

  “Thank you, Your Honor.” Tyler turned to the painfully beautiful, pale purple woman with small, dog-like ears who stood before him. “Queen Leola, how did you first learn of the alleged murder?”

  “The servants cried, ‘Someone has killed the Emperor!’ I flew to her chambers.”

  “Your witness.” Tyler sat.

  “I know she’s my witness!” Yerzail took over. “Dear Queen, did you ever witness Prince Zenna and the alien Yumiko Matsuda upon that fateful evening?”

  Leola took a deep breath. “I did, Lord Prosecutor.”

  “Tell us what you saw.”

  “When I went into the hall to ask a servant to summon the First Queen’s physician, I passed a window with a view of the inner courtyard. Down below, I saw Prince Zenna and Yumiko Matsuda hurry across the square toward the stalls of parked skimmers. I opened the window, leaned out, and watched the Terran woman enter the skimmer bays and emerge with a running vehicle. Zenna-Zenn remained in the courtyard to guard their escape.”

  “Why do you say he guarded their escape?” Yerzail said.

  She shivered. “He had a rifle blaster, which I assumed was the murder weapon. It was the same type which Queen Veraposta kept under her bed.”

  “And what happened next?” Yerzail said.

  “They drove away, out the public access gate.”

  Yerzail faced the holo-cameras. “I retrieved the rifle blaster from that very skimmer, abandoned at a small craft spaceport on the spinward edge of the city. Prince Zenna’s DNA was found on the murder weapon.”

  Tyler bounced up. “Your Honor, since my learned opponent is testifying, might I ask him a question?”

  Felizool chuckled. “Seems fair to me. Make it a short exchange. I need a snack break.”

  “Mr. Chief Prosecutor, did you find other DNA evidence on the weapon?”

  “Well, yes, there was a trace.”

  “Whose DNA trace did you discover?”

  “I don’t see how that is—”

  “Was First Queen Veraposta’s DNA on the weapon?”

  “Yes, but—”

  “Was Second Queen Leola’s DNA on the weapon?”

  “Your Honor—”

  Felizool grunted. “Answer the question, Yerzail.”

  “Yes. But since the rifle-blaster belonged to the First Queen Veraposta, it is logical she might have shown it to her Sister Queen.”

  “So, the First Queen owned the weapon that killed her husband, and the Second Queen handled the same weapon?”

  “That is irrelevant.”

  “Why did Veraposta have a rifle blaster in her bed chamber? Do you have especially large rodents in the palace?”

  The Judge rapped on the bench. “Don’t be flippant, Mr. Matthews.”

  “She kept the weapon at hand because of death threats against members of the Royal Household,” Yerzail said.

  “Now you tell us something new,” Tyler said. “Who made those death threats? Prince Zenna?”

  “We are not certain.”

  “So, at the time of the Emperor’s demise, other players had threatened the Royal Family with death, and you are not certain who they were?”

&n
bsp; “We caught Prince Zenna, who confessed.”

  “Didn’t you mean to say, ‘The Prince returned to Annistyn voluntarily’?”

  “Whereupon he confessed to the murder. Queen Veraposta also gave eyewitness testimony to Zenna’s crime. We need not look elsewhere.”

  “So, you decided who did it and turned your energy toward proving your theory of the crime. Did you ever seriously consider anyone other than Prince Zenna?”

  “Why would I do that?” Yerzail said. “We had a confessed regicide and a royal witness.”

  Tyler grunted, waiting for complete translation. “Four Terran years have passed since the murder. Did you do anything to investigate the crime in those intervening years?”

  “It was not necessary!” Yerzail bellowed.

  “My Lord Judge,” Queen Leola said, “may I be excused, or will you hear more from me?”

  “Do you have more to add, Highness?” Felizool said.

  “Yes, Lord Felizool.” Her voice trembled slightly. “Although it is most disquieting.”

  “Pray do so.”

  “Objection, Your Honor!” Tyler said. The last thing he wanted was to unleash another magnificent liar with a license to destroy Mr. Blue and Yumiko. “Lady Justice demands this court weigh and balance the facts, not listen to speculation, however lofty the source.”

  “Your ‘Lady Justice’ does not preside here, Mr. Matthews.”

  Felizool gestured to Leola Rhautina. “We eagerly await further testimony from our Second Queen.”

  Leola spiked Tyler with a cool, blue-eyed, glare of defiance. “I fear the motive for this heinous crime may threaten all Quirt-Thymeans.”

  “What do you mean?” Yerzail said.

  “Prince Zenna is an agent of the Terran Commonwealth. Doubtless he was recruited by Matthews Interstellar Industries to subvert our political system and prepare the way for an invasion of our Empire by humans, especially those from the planet Earth.”

  Oh, shit. Tyler backed away from her, and cursed himself for that act of trepidation. The last thing he wanted was the vast audience of Quirt-Thymeans watching by holographic broadcast to see him cowed by her accusation. He might as well have shouted, “Yes, we did it! And we’re coming for all of you!”