Hearts on Fire

by Amber Thielman

  I looked at the radio in my hand, heart racing, wondering what kind of trouble I’d get into for directly disobeying Tate’s orders. Going in would risk getting kicked off the squad...all be for a man who hated me.

  “Copy, sir,” I said finally. Across the lot, Tanner was standing near the truck. He stared at me with his eyes narrowed and his lips curled in a smirk, one hand resting comfortably on the hose. I had the overwhelming urge to flip him the bird.

  “Since when do you obey orders, Harper?” he called. “Tate would have already been upstairs.”

  I tried to ignore him and turned my back. I thought of Kyle and Porter in that building, consumed by smoke and fire. There was no sound on the radio, no confirmation that they were okay in there...that they were alive. We were all rookies here, none of us were trained for this situation, which is why Tate had told me to wait.

  “None of you newbies should even be here without your captain,” said the redheaded paramedic. I glanced in her direction, then over at Finn.

  “I can’t just stand here,” I said.

  “Don’t.” He shook his head fiercely. “It’s not a game in there, Hallie.”

  “They need my help.”

  “We can’t lose all three of you. Porter is already in there with him. You won’t be of help.”

  I turned away from Finn and back at the burning building. The radio was still crackling with an unrelenting and daunting silence. In the distance, I heard the sirens, but they were still too far out. Time was of the essence; we all knew it.

  “Tell Tate I’m sorry.” Before Finn could stop me, I slammed on my helmet and secured the SCBA, running towards the building. I couldn’t hear anything but the roar in my own ears. My heart raced, thudding painfully against my chest as I entered the building into all-consuming darkness and flames.

  Chapter 16

  Tate

  “Where are they?” I shoved the door open and jumped out of the driver’s seat of the rig, fear gripping every part of my body. My two rookies, Jake Finn and Tanner Rey, were standing together near the truck. Julia and her partner were in the back of their bus, waiting to see if anyone had victims ready for transport. Tanner was holding the hose on the building, but the flames didn’t look as though they were diminishing. I knew two of my men were still trapped inside, and Hallie was nowhere to be seen.

  “Captain—” Jake started, then he fell silent, it confirmed all I needed to know.

  “You let her go in there?” I said. Before Jake could answer, I grabbed my gear from the truck and pulled it on my body, adrenaline pulsating through me.

  “Cap!” someone shouted behind me. It was Porter. He was coming around the side of the building, covered in ash and soot, grappling to take his mask off for a breath of fresh air. He stumbled up to me, exhausted, wheezing.

  “Get a second bus here right away.” Finn nodded at my demand and helped Porter with his suit. “Get him checked out now.”

  “Kyle’s hurt,” Porter said as we removed his mask. “He fell through the fourth floor. I don’t know if anyone can get in there for him, Cap.”

  “Shit.” I turned back to the building, hesitating. I couldn’t send any more men in after them, not if the structure was so fragile, but I also couldn’t leave them in there to die, either. I reached for my radio, praying she would be able to respond.

  DARKNESS LOOMED FROM every turn. A black hole that enveloped me and dragged me in. Smoke hung everywhere, a dank, murky smoke that blended with the dark walls and consumed the space around me. Orange flames flickered above and below, licking the ashy surface of what once was a hardwood floor.

  I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, allowing the vent of the oxygen to reassure me. Every step had to count, because any step could be the last one I took.

  The stairway groaned and creaked below my feet, smoke slithering around my feet and ankles, a mere warning of what was to come. There were no flames on the first floor, but the rest of the building held the heat. The higher up I climbed, the thicker the smoke became.

  Tate’s voice came over the radio as I planted my step firmly on the second floor. One hand gripped the rickety hand rail, the other reached out in front of me as I tried to feel my way across the floor. I could only use the lightest tread, and not rush; rushing across this floor could mean a collapse that would likely kill me and send down any other firefighter relying on the burning floor to keep them alive.

  “Hallie, do you copy?” Tate’s voice was garbled, blended with the static of the radio.

  “I’m here.” My words came out in no more than a whisper.

  “I want you—turn-aroun—come back—o...do you copy?”

  “Sorry, sir, you’re breaking up.”

  “Hal—”

  I couldn’t turn back, not now. Somewhere in the building, the beep of a distress alarm let out a loud beep. My heart caught in my throat, however long that alarm had been going off equated to however long one of my crew had been down. It seemed to be coming from another floor up, maybe two.

  Taking another steadying breath, I made my away across the floor, carefully avoiding the growing hot spots creeping up the walls. Through the black smoke, I felt around for the second stairwell and found the first step, hesitating for a moment to make sure it hadn’t burned through yet.

  Halfway up the stairs the beeping grew louder, closer. Hopefully close enough I could get those men out of there in time...if I wasn’t already too late.

  The steps groaned beneath my weight, shifting a bit with each step I took. Both my hands braced on either side of the railing, praying to whatever higher power there was that we would all make it out of here alive.

  “Kyle?” I shouted. My voice seemed engulfed by the smoke, as though the fire actively resisted my mission to save people. “Porter?”

  No sound came back, nothing but the frantic beep of the emergency device. I took another step, wincing at the sharp, horrifying sound of splintering wood reached my ears. I stopped, catching my breath, my eyes squeezed shut, waiting for the inevitable collapse.

  It didn’t come.

  “Jesus,” I breathed. It took me another couple of seconds to settle my racing heart, but I knew I couldn’t stand there for long. If I didn’t find Kyle and Porter and get us the hell out of that building, we’d all die. There was no escaping it.

  “Kyle,” I called again. “Porter? It’s Hallie. Can you hear me?” I took another step, and then another. My hands gripped the railings with desperate terror, although it didn’t matter I held onto; if the building went down, no railing would save my life.

  One more step and I found my way to the top, standing unsteadily at the brink of the third floor. The smoke was too thick; the flames had nearly engulfed the entire floor. And there, lying in the middle of flames, either dead or unconscious, was Kyle.

  I stopped myself rushing to his side. If there was ever a time to take it slow, it was now. The flames grew, gnawing through the wood floors with unrelenting wrath. We were closer to the danger zone than I had been any moment before this one. Above us, the flames had eaten through the floor. A startling realization hit me. He’d fallen through the floor above. Soon, this floor would collapse too . . . how soon I didn’t know.

  “Kyle, it’s Harper.” I stood still as a statue. “Can you hear me? Where’s Porter?”

  Nothing happened. Kyle didn’t move. I’d have to risk putting my own weight next to his and simply hope and pray that the floor wouldn’t give way and send us falling to our deaths.

  “I should have expected you’d be the result of my inevitable death.” I talked out-loud, mainly to myself as I took steps towards him. “And here we are, inside a burning building—without Porter, I noticed—and your ass is being saved by the one person you simply can’t stand. Oh, the irony.”

  Wood cracked beneath me. I stopped, breath catching in my throat. When it didn’t give way immediately, I continued, dodging flames while trying to see through the black smoke wrapping me in a suffocating cocoon.r />
  “Kyle, please don’t die.” I lowered myself next to his still body. “I know we’re not best friends, but I could use a morale boost at work.” My hands shook as I gently rolled him over, onto his back. I am sure he’s dead. I’m too late. Then his eyes flickered open under the mask of his suit, and he stared up at me.

  “It’s about time,” he muttered.

  Laughing hysterically, I reset his PDA and helped him sit up.

  “Where’s Porter?”

  “He went back to get help,” Kyle said, wincing. “Are you the help?”

  “You can call me Hallie. I thought he was in here with you. Are you hurt?”

  “Would you be hurt if you fell through a floor?”

  “I can make it hurt worse, if that’s what you want.” Grunting under his weight, I helped Kyle to his feet. His leg seemed injured, I didn’t know how badly, but I didn’t have much time to wonder how in the hell we were going to make it safely back down the stairs on his bum leg. We were already out of time.

  The sounds of splintering wood snapped through the air. Kyle’s grip on my shoulder instantly tightened.

  “Hurry,” I whispered, too late. Another crack like a gunshot vibrated through the air, and the floor beneath our feet cracked and splintered. The last thing I saw were malicious red and orange flames lapping at our feet as the floor gave way beneath us.

  Chapter 17

  Tate

  At first, I had no doubt in my mind they were dead.

  The time passed in slow motion. A dreamlike sensation engulfed me in low level of shock. From the time Kyle and Hallie were dug out of the rubble to the very moment we got them through the ER doors, unconscious but breathing, I had no doubt in my mind they were dead.

  Somewhere near me, Jake and Tanner spoke quietly to each other. Julia, who had dropped Kyle off, said something to me and then kissed me on the lips before heading back to her station. None of it registered. An ER nurse fluttered past us, barely looking up. Down the hall, the smell of coffee wafted in the air.

  “Captain?” Jake woke me from the living nightmare. “Captain Becker?”

  I looked up from the discolored tile floor, straight into the eyes of the chief physician, Dr. Hammond.

  “Are they—?” I stood up, and so did the rest of my team, flanking me on either side.

  “They’re fine.” The doctor smiled a bit. “Their gear protected them. Kyle’s leg was pinned, but still sufficiently undamaged. A few bruises and minor lacerations is all, Tate.” He took a deep breath, nodding to me. “Honestly, they’re both lucky to be alive. Especially Kyle.”

  “Especially Kyle?” Porter repeated. “How so?”

  “Much longer trapped in that building and the smoke inhalation could have killed him. He was lucky someone went in after him.”

  I sent the guys back to the station in case any other calls came and then stopped by Kyle’s room to see him. His face sported bruises, and a laceration with stitches traveled just above his eyebrow.

  “How are you feeling, man?” I took a seat next to his bed, grateful not for the first time that my good friend and best employee was still alive. In a job like this, surviving every day was something to be thankful for.

  “I’ve been better,” Kyle said. He flinched as he shifted himself on the bed, rolling his neck to the side. “But I should tell you, man, the nurses here are really hooking me up with the sponge baths and pain meds.”

  “You’ve been here three hours, Kyle.”

  “You’d be surprised what they can get done in three hours.” Kyle laughed, coughing, then winked at me. “Hey...how’s Harper?” he asked. “I mean, she’s still alive, right?”

  “She’s still alive,” I confirmed. “But I haven’t been in to see her yet.” I hesitated a moment, unsure if I should say anything further.

  “Ah, well.” He fell silent, pondering things. I thought he was about to ask me to thank her for him, but he didn’t.

  “Hey, why don’t you take the next couple of weeks off, yeah?”

  “Weeks? Nah, Captain, I’m ready to go back to work today.”

  “Fine, make it a couple of days. That’s an order.”

  “Only if I get to stay here and keep getting pampered by the cute nurses.”

  “You let me know how that goes for you.” I squeezed Kyle’s arm. “Just keep in mind you’ll be getting a written warning for entering that building without your entire crew on scene, so soak up the attention while you can.”

  “Aw, Cap.”

  I got Hallie’s room number from an orderly behind the nurse’s desk and headed that direction, trying to pull myself together before seeing her. I was torn between so many emotions; relieved that she was okay, but angry, angry she’d disobeyed me and gone into that building anyway. She’d put her own life at risk, an inexperienced rookie balancing on the rope between acceptance and self-sabotage. She’d saved a life this time, sure, but this time had been a fluke. We were rarely so lucky.

  Rounding the corner of the ER, I heard Hallie speak from a few rooms down. I continued, figuring it was just a nurse, but then stopped in my tracks when her tone got louder and more intense.

  “I’m fine, Jer.” The irritation in her tone was clear.

  “I don’t like this, Hallie,” replied a male voice, one I didn’t recognize. I took another hesitant step forward and peeked around the corner into Hallie’s room. She was sitting up on the bed, already fully clothed and lacing up her boots to leave. Standing near the far wall was a man I didn’t recognize. Tall and lanky, with glasses and disheveled hair. I could sense the tension in the air without even going in. I knew not to interrupt.

  “Do you know how scared I was to get this call?” The man wasn’t going to let it go. “I thought for sure you were dead.”

  “I’m fine, Jeremy,” Hallie said again. “I asked them not to call you.”

  “And why would you do that?” Jeremy demanded. “I’m your fiancé, Hallie, I deserve to know what in the hell is going on with you. You should have called me.”

  I took a step away from the door, the word fiancé ringing in my ears like some foreign, poisonous word I’d never heard before. Hallie never told me that she was engaged. But then again, why should she? We were coworkers, not friends; it wasn’t my business.

  I started to turn away to leave them at it, but Hallie was too quick on her feet. She rounded the corner just as I took a step in the opposite direction.

  “Tate,” she said, and stopped short. The man, Jeremy, came up behind her, and she suddenly seemed to catch herself. “I mean Captain, sorry.”

  “I, uh, just wanted to stop by and check on you,” My response sounded awkward to my own ears. Hallie forced a fake smile.

  “Well, I’m fine,” she said. “Just a few bruises, no broken bones. I heard Kyle is okay, too?”

  “Thanks to you,” I said, hyperaware that Hallie’s fiancé stared at me from over her shoulder.

  “It was no big—”

  “I don’t think we’ve met,” Jeremy said, cutting Hallie off. He stepped up beside her and held his hand out to mine. “I’m Jeremy, Hallie’s fiancé. Who are you?”

  “This is Tate Becker.” Her introduction was quick. “My captain.”

  I shook Jeremy’s hand, trying to ignore the awkward sensation in the air between us.

  “I’d like to come back to work, Cap,” Hallie said to me. I cleared my throat, careful not to look too long at Jeremy.

  “I gave Kyle a few days to rest. I’d like you to do the same.”

  “But I don’t—”

  “That will be great,” Jeremy said. “God knows she needs it.”

  I watched the expression on Hallie’s face cloud over, anger simmering dangerously close to the surface. I wanted to see her snap at him, stand up for herself, but somehow, she bit her tongue and smiled tightly instead.

  “So, I’ll see you Monday?” she said.

  “Sure.”

  I watched Hallie and Jeremy go, noticing the way they walked an
arm’s length apart, untouching. Even from where I stood, I could see the tensed muscles in Hallie’s body, the way she distanced herself from Jeremy’s touch.

  In my pocket, my cell phone buzzed again. I took it out and looked at the screen, seeing Julia’s face smiling up at me. I silenced the call and slipped the phone back into my pocket.

  Chapter 18

  Hallie

  The car ride home was silent. Jeremy sulked in the driver’s seat of our SUV his fingers tapping irritatingly on the steering wheel as the radio played some annoying pop song in the background. I wanted to go home and shower and sleep, to wash the day off and move on like it had never happened. I knew I could be in trouble for disobeying Tate, and that thought unsettled me more than anything else. I could have been killed, yes, and I could have brought Kyle down with me. It was by a mere stroke of luck both of us were still alive and in one piece.

  I sighed and rested my head against the window, wishing we could stop for some painkillers for the ache in my back, but I knew if I brought it up Jeremy would start bitching again, and I couldn’t bring myself to listen to it. Fuck it. Fuck it all.

  Thank God for small favors, Jeremy didn’t say anything more the whole ride back home. He even helped me inside, silent, but still brooding, and helped me undress so I could shower under a hot stream of water. I was bruised and sore, my muscles ached from my neck to the bottom of my soles, but not once did I allow a gasp or flinch of pain to escape; I wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of knowing that the inevitable had already happened.

  After my shower, I pulled on a fluffy bath robe and went to the kitchen for some wine, but Jeremy was already standing at the counter holding a glass for me. I took it gratefully, the sweet red tingling the tip of my tongue.

  “How are you feeling?” He reached out and touched my cheek. It had been a long time since he’d been intimate towards me, months since he’d touched me in such a way that wasn’t just because of some marital obligation. I smiled and leaned my head into his hand.