The Kissing Tutor

by Sally Henson

  Madi giggled. “I know. This lavender is perfect. Roan will flip when he sees you in this. Definitely a yes.”

  I scowled. “I can’t.”

  Cayla stepped in front of me and took my hands in hers, asking, “I know you think he’s good-looking. It was his idea. Why can’t you?”

  I dropped my gaze. With every thought and word about Roan, my chest weighed heavier. “Yeah, he’s tall, dark, and handsome. And I even get that nervous twist in my stomach when I’m around him sometimes, but he doesn’t see me like that. I’m just one of the guys.” My throat tightened. Admitting this out loud was one more drop of humiliation in my rapidly expanding lake. I glanced around the dressing area. There had been a woman trying clothes on earlier, but I didn’t see her.

  “It’s just us,” Cayla said, releasing my hands.

  My teeth grazed my bottom lip before I continued, “I had hoped the tutor would turn into a boyfriend or at least a few sweet dates in public where I got caught looking like an expert kisser. Not like I was mauling my prey.”

  Madi snickered. “You’ve really become dramatic this year.”

  I puffed out a shot of air through my nostrils as one corner of my mouth lifted. It eased the pressure from my chest too. That seemed to be true. This whole year had been a rollercoaster ride. “Maybe,” I admitted.

  My phone dinged from the shorts pocket I’d worn to the store. They hung on one of the pegs in the dressing room.

  “Look,” Cayla said, tilting her head. “If Roan didn’t want to do this, he never would have offered. He’s probably been stewing over it since the moment you asked. Just give it a try.”

  “Yeah, sis. Maybe you two are meant to be together. Wouldn’t that be awesome?” She clasped her hands together with a dreamy look in her eyes. “I hope one day I can fall in love with a boy who’s my best friend.”

  “Me too.” Cayla wrapped her arms around me. Madi joined the group hug.

  “Ugh, I’m not in love with him. He’s not in love with me.”

  “Just see how it goes. If it’s weird after he kisses you a couple times, all you have to do is say so. Okay?” she asked.

  “You could be in love and not realize it,” Madi said with a hopeful voice. “But even if you’re not, you get to practice with a hot guy. Roan fits that description.”

  I closed my eyes and groaned. They were right. I was running out of time. “I’ll try it.”

  The girls untangled themselves. Madi turned on her bossy voice and said, “Try on the other outfit.”

  I stepped back in the confined space, closed the door, and pressed the lock button on the handle. I dared to check my reflection. A smile stretched across my face. The dress fit my body in all the right ways. I looked good. And definitely like a girl.

  “That dress is on the sporty side. And so is the rest of what I picked out. Let me get a pair of shoes to go with it.” Madi’s sandals clopped away.

  “You want me to message Roan that you’re ready to get started?” Cayla asked.

  I slipped the dress off and tossed it over the top of the door. “No,” I said quickly. “I’ll talk to him.” It was hard to say what Cayla would send him, thinking she was helping.

  I pulled on a pair of shorts. Even though I had no problem buttoning them, they clung to my body and were shorter than I usually wore. I grasped the hem and tugged them down. The shirt seemed okay. I slid my hands through the armholes and lifted it over my head. It had more of an hourglass shape to it rather than the usual straight T-shirt I was accustomed to.

  I opened the door. “Well?” I turned in a circle. “The shorts are too tight.”

  “They’re perfect!” Madi grabbed my shoulders and spun me around again.

  Cayla gave me two thumbs up. “They seriously show off your legs,” she said.

  Showing my legs off was not a good thing. My phone dinged again. I’d forgotten to check it. “One more outfit and I’m done trying on clothes.”

  I closed the door and dug my phone out of the shorts I’d worn here. Now that I was aware, they were basically basketball shorts. Ugh, I needed to change it up a little. I typed in my code and checked my messages.

  Roan: Heard you had a great game. Let’s celebrate. Pick you up in ten minutes?

  Roan: I’m at your house. Where are you?

  My stomach did that rollercoaster dip like the other night and I wasn’t even in his presence. “Roan said he heard I had a good game and wants to celebrate,” I said, but it came out as a question. If he was my kissing tutor, he might plan to kiss me. The thought made my insides jittery. What had I agreed to?

  Cayla shot me an order. “Tell him you will meet him at the pier.”

  Before thinking about it, I typed the message and pressed send.

  “Hurry and try on the last outfit,” Madi barked. Now my little sister was giving me orders? Was everyone in charge except me?

  I changed clothes while they were muttering to each other. If my pulse wasn’t beating like a base drum in my ears, I might have been able to understand what they were talking about.

  I pulled on the white, straight-legged pants and tied the drawstring. The coral shirt was tight and a little on the bright side for me, but obviously I wasn’t good at style. “Okay,” I said, turning the handle and stepping out.

  “Dang, Tommie.” Cayla’s eyes widened with her smile. “You look amazing.”

  I giggled. “Good thing I have on white underwear today.”

  “Here,” Madi said, handing me the sandals. “Put these on.”

  I slipped on the nude-colored shoes. They were comfortable. I looked down at the top. “This shirt isn’t too…tight and bright?”

  “Just because you can tell you have boobs doesn’t mean it’s too tight. And the color goes with your skin tone.” Madi pointed at my waist. “Tuck it in though.”

  After I did as she said, she moved her finger in a circle, directing me to turn around.

  I did as she asked. Again.

  She and Cayla smacked high fives and bumped hips. “Mission accomplished!” Madi stepped closer, grabbed the price tags, and snapped the plastic from the shirt and pants.

  “What are you doing?” She knew better than to steal. Didn’t she?

  She held them up and said, “You’re wearing this on your first tutoring session.”

  “It’s not an official lesson. We’re celebrating our wins. We do this all the time,” I explained. It was more for my benefit than theirs.

  Cayla had snuck behind me and gathered the clothes I’d worn in. “You’re not getting these back. Not today anyway.” She did hand over my phone though and I slid it in the pants pocket.

  “Let me fix your hair.” Madi slipped a comb out of her purse and pulled my hair into a messy bun. “Just need a little…” She dug in her purse and took out a stick of eyeliner, a tube of mascara, and lip gloss. “Enhancement,” she finished and began to apply the color my top eyelids by my lashes. Nothing like a pointy stick near the eye. I insisted on doing the mascara myself. I’d done it a few times. Putting on the lip gloss was a no brainer.

  “What all do you have in the purse?” I teased. My phone dinged. I pulled the phone from my pocket and checked the message. My heart beat increased. I swallowed and said, “He’s there.”

  All three of us squealed. What was wrong with me? This was Roan, my best friend, not one of my Sweet Water High crushes.

  “Okay. It’s just another day. You’re just wearing different clothes. That’s it,” Cayla assured me.

  I nodded, hoping she was right. I took in a steadying breath. “Thanks, guys,” I said. Maybe if Roan could see that I could look nice, like a girl, other boys would too.

  Madi gathered the other outfit. “Let’s pay and get you to the beach.”

  10

  Cayla slowed at the curb by the pier, practically kicked me out of the Jeep, and sped off. It might have had something to do with me deciding I should send Roan a message saying I didn’t feel good and that I had gone home.

/>   While I stood at the edge of the wide concrete separating the road and the sand, I swallowed and took a few slow breaths to calm my racing heart. An older couple holding hands passed in front of me. I took another deep breath and told myself, it’s just you and Roan. No big deal. You celebrate like this all the time.

  Scanning the cars parked along the road, I spotted Roan’s gray Toyota truck two cars down, but he wasn’t in it. My search moved across the few people on the beach and those lining the pier, fishing. Roan’s back and wide shoulders caught my eye at the end of the long dock. A tiny shot of adrenaline spiked through my chest as if I was about to do something completely wild and dangerous.

  The rush of the ocean tide usually relaxed me, so I closed my eyes for a second and listened. Sweet Water was such a great place to grow up. Sand and surf anytime I wanted. Good friends to share it with. And softball.

  My pulse had settled. A calm confidence came over me. I opened my eyes to begin my trek and saw that Roan headed toward me. His dark hair lifted from the ocean breeze. It didn’t matter what time of year it was. His complexion made him look tanned. In the pictures I’d seen of his mom, she had dark hair too, but her light skin was more like mine. His dad had bronzed skin. I suppose that had to do with him being from Argentina.

  Roan had on a small grin as he approached. He was wearing loafers too, which meant we wouldn’t be going to the batting cages. My attire wouldn’t work for something like that. When we were only a few feet away, his eyes widened and the grin he was wearing faded for a brief moment.

  My stomach dropped. The girls wouldn’t lie to me about looking nice, would they? I stopped and waited for him, trying to smile. “Hey,” I said.

  He stopped in front of me with his eyebrows lifted. He chuckled. “I almost didn’t recognize you. New clothes?” he asked, looking me over.

  “Yep.” I shuffled my weight from one foot to the other. “So, how was your game?”

  “You weren’t there,” he grumbled.

  I shoved my hands in my pockets. “Uh, Cayla, Madi, and I went shopping. Hence the new clothes.”

  “Ah.” He nodded toward the sidewalk, held his arm out, and waited for me to step that direction. We walked side by side. “We won. I did okay.”

  I fixed my eyes on his expression and asked, “Just okay? What happened?”

  He shrugged. “My stance was okay. I felt…off. You know?”

  I had plenty of feeling off lately. I nodded. “What do you think it is? Coach on your case?”

  “Nah, it’s not that.” He paused. Shrugged. “My grandparents might downsize. My dad called and wants me to come visit.” He tilted his head up and let out a long breath.

  “After all this time of silence? He’s got a lot of nerve.” Roan was a big boy who can take care of himself. I knew that. But when it came to protecting his heart from his dad, I was like a mamma bear. “Tell him he lost his privileges when he left. That jerk.”

  “Yeah, I know. Grams thinks it might be a good idea, but Gramps doesn’t. He’s concerned if I go to Argentina, he might try to get me to stay. He said the government could keep me from traveling back, and I would be stuck there.” He led us to a bench overlooking the beach and sea.

  I took a seat and he settled next to me. “Do you want to go?” I wouldn’t have thought traveling to see his dad was even a thought after all this time.

  “I don’t know.” He stretched his arms on either side of him along the back of the bench. “I have so many questions, but I’d like the satisfaction of telling him off to his face.”

  “Make him come and see you,” I said. Roan, his dad, and grandparents moved here right after his mom died. His grandparents had lived in Sweet Water before and liked the town. When Roan and his dad moved in with them, they decided they needed a bigger house and better schools. That’s when he came into my life.

  “Yeah,” he said, sounding unsure. “That’s probably what I’ll do.”

  I swiveled on the bench and angled toward him. Roan was decisive. But when it came to his dad, all bets were off. “You still have that punching bag hanging in your garage, don’t you?” I asked.

  “Yeah” he said with his eyebrows knit together. “Why?”

  “I think we ought to start training. If your dad shows,” I smacked my fist into my palm, “I’m going to punch him right in the nose.”

  Roan busted up, laughing. “You couldn’t punch your way out of a paper bag.”

  “Oh, yeah?” I asked, jabbing him in the stomach.

  He grabbed my wrists and put on a shocked expression. “You’re so violent,” he teased. “I’m not sure I can tutor someone with that kind of behavior.”

  I gave him a giant eye roll, hoping he didn’t notice the heat flushing my neck and cheeks.

  He stood, continued chuckling at me, and pulled me up by my wrist with him and said, “Come on. I haven’t been on the beach in a while. Let’s walk along the surf.”

  “No football, or Frisbee?” Usually we had something to do besides walk.

  He shook his head and slipped his shoes off.

  I leaned down and rolled up my pant legs to my calves, slipped my sandals off, and hooked my fingers through the back straps. I hoped he didn’t notice my shoddy toenails. “I’m ready,” I said.

  The warm sand relaxed me even when I thought I was already there. We stepped through the grains and walked along the tide. The direction we took was the opposite of people and the busyness of the shops along the waterfront.

  Roan bumped my shoulder and said, “Sorry, didn’t plan on moping about my dad. Tell me about your win.”

  “Don’t worry about it,” I said, wrapping my hands around his arm and leaning my head on his shoulder. “That’s what best friends are for.” I let our closeness sink in for a moment before I straightened. “Pitching felt good. It was almost like I was a pitching machine. My stride was the same every time.” I looked up at him. “Thanks for that.” Roan pointed that out to me right away the other morning. How could he figure that out in three pitches but my coach couldn’t tell me what I was doing wrong?

  “What can I say? I know you.” He beamed.

  I giggled and teased, “Aren’t you glad you moved next to Tommie the Tomboy? I totally rocked your world.”

  He chuckled as he slung his arm around my shoulders and said, “You did rock my world. Twice. I don’t know what I would’ve done without you when we moved in, or when Dad left.”

  My eyes watered and I blinked to keep any tears from falling. The breeze helped dry them up too. How did he go from teasing to heart-wrenching so fast? It gave me emotional whiplash.

  “You do the same for me.” Dad had either been deployed or away for training with the Marines most of my life. I hardly got to talk to him because of the time difference. This was getting depressing. I had to change the gloom. “What should we do to celebrate? I was pretty awesome,” I said teasingly. I jumped in front of him and did an impression of his little hip action he does after catching the last pitch of a winning game.

  It didn’t last long because he lugged me over his shoulder and ran down the beach. “You’re getting launched into the water.”

  “Okay,” I squealed, laughing so hard I snorted. “I’ll stop. I’ll stop.”

  “I’m going to teach you a lesson,” he said, wading out a few feet into the water.

  Giggles kept pouring out of me to the point my cheeks hurt, and I was gasping for air.

  He back-stepped to the edge of the lapping tide and slid me off his shoulder onto the shifting sand. Strands of my hair fell out of the bun on top my head, but I was having too much fun to care about what I looked like.

  Roan kept his grip on my waist. His chest rose and fell as fast as mine. I knew this because, for some reason, my palms pressed against his pecs.

  I couldn’t look away. He was so…pretty. Thick-chested men could definitely be pretty. His warm eyes glanced at my mouth before he leaned down. My heart raced even faster than it was.

  “I’m
going to kiss you,” he whispered, his warm breath brushing my skin before our mouths met.

  Heat spread across my lips and down to my heart. Instead of being rigid like the night James kissed me, I softened, melting against Roan. This was so much better. Roan’s lips were not too soft, not too tight. They were just right.

  He pulled away before I was ready. “Lesson one. Kissing is better when it’s spontaneous.”

  Oh, it was a tutoring lesson. I looked down at his embroidered eagle on his cotton polo. My excited heart down-shifted. It didn’t realize his kiss wasn’t real either. I separated myself from him. My body didn’t want to obey though, so I had to take another step back.

  Forcing my eyes to steer clear of his, I tried to act like I knew it wasn’t real. “I see. Spontaneous. Right. Lesson one.” I cleared my throat, stuffing my hands in my pants pockets.

  “You want to go to the Burger Bar and get something to eat?” he asked.

  I turned back to the direction we came from. “I can’t. I should get back since it’s my night to cook.”

  “Oh,” he said with surprise. “Okay.”

  The stroll back to his truck was more like a speed-walk. The kind middle-aged women that raced by my house three times a week did, pumping their bent arms back and forth in rapid motion. We climbed in his truck and he started the engine as we buckled our seat belts.

  “Ready?” he asked. It was the first word either of us uttered since we left the beach.

  I nodded.

  His eyes scrolled down my new clothes and back, lingering longer that I thought was normal for a friend before he pulled out onto the road. But what did I know?

  When Roan turned on our street, he broke the silence between us and asked, “What are we having for supper?”

  He wanted to come over? After the weirdness following his kiss? “Um, not sure. Something with hamburger. Probably a salad.”

  He stopped in front of my house. “I’ll park my truck in the garage and be over to help.”

  That moment on the beach with him felt so real. I wanted it to be real, and that surprised me. This kissing tutor deal blurred the lines of friendship, and I wasn’t sure I could separate the two. I wish Cayla was here to decipher what was going on.