Void
Page 17
Gritt squeezed me harder. His hands had bunched up my t-shirt, and now all I could feel were his rough fingertips digging into my skin. “Don’t I know it,” Gritt whispered.
I stared at him for a moment before deciding to take his advice. “You want me to be resourceful? You want me not to be a martyr? Fine. Take me to your room,” I said with challenge.
I saw his throat bob, and I wanted to lift up on my tiptoes and lick the sexy Adam’s apple that bobbed below his blond scruff. “If you care so much, then I’ll sleep there tonight. And if you’re nice, I might even share the bed.”
I waited, seeing how he would respond. I expected Gritt to put up a fight, to argue and tell me that there was no way in hell that he’d let the nasty Void into his shifter dorms. I expected rejection. But instead, a slight purring made his chest vibrate as he stepped even closer. I gasped when I felt his hard erection press against me. “Okay.”
I blinked at him. “Okay?” I clarified, my earlier confidence fleeing my body.
“But no feeding. Last time...it was too much. My animals lost their godsdamned minds,” Gritt said before putting distance between us once again. It was on the edge of my tongue to ask him what he meant by that. Last time we’d spoken, he’d denied that there was any pull between us. I knew what he was thinking—that he’d rather spend his life alone than accept a mate bond with the Void.
“No feeding,” I heard myself promise. My heart beat fast in my chest. Was I really doing this? Was I really going to spend the night with him? Gritt was…well, Gritt. He was wild and rough and hot and mean. Only, there was another side of him, too. He just tried not to let that side deal with me. But the softer, protective, and sweeter side was there. I just knew it. And I realized, with a jolt, that I wanted to get to know that side. I wanted him to lower his walls so that I could see him. All of him.
Maybe challenging him to spend the night with me was odd, considering that he’d once attacked me, but the pull between us couldn’t be ignored, and despite everything, when Gritt was around, I felt...what the hell did I feel? Better? Comforted? No, those weren’t quite right. I guess, when he was around, I felt more...connected. Like he was the other end of a shoelace, and we were supposed to be tangled up together.
“Come on, then. I told my shifter an hour ago that she could come down, so she’ll be here soon. We should get going.”
“Okay,” I said.
“But the damn rat stays here.”
“And let him get eaten by a feral shifter, no way!”
Gritt glowered at me, crossing his big muscular arms in front of him.
“Fine,” I said with a huff. I turned and scooped up Cheddar, little bed and all. “Come on, little cheese, you can sleep outside tonight.”
Once I got Cheddar settled near the base of a tree, certain he was plenty comfy with moss in his bed, I followed a grumbling Gritt back to the academy, chuckling at his “damn rat” talk.
It took us a little while to get all the way back to the shifter dorms since they were located in a separate building with specific amenities for the different types of shifter animals. At the lower level, there were massive, deep pools for oceanic animals, and the entire outside of the building was full of trees and plants, some of them even growing through the roofs and windows. It was like the dorms were built around the forest instead of bulldozing its way on top of it.
“This is beautiful,” I said before following him through the doors. Naturally, shifters started to sneer and growl the moment we walked inside, some of them even baring their teeth at Gritt. He snapped back, letting his paragon power roll through the building with authority.
“My room is this way,” he said before leading me down a corridor filled with vines. Moss covered the doors and walls, and instead of room numbers, there were carved rocks on each door. He stopped at a door at the end of the hallway and opened it slowly, pausing in the threshold of the door to address me. “Don’t touch anything. Don’t mess with my stuff. I’m very...territorial.”
“You don’t say?” I teased, pushing past his bulky frame to go inside.
Gritt’s room was impressive. It had a traditional design with large windows looking out onto the field, making the room seem even bigger than it already was. The room was massive, with vaulted ceilings held up by solid wooden beams. It felt more like an upscale apartment than a shifter dorm room.
“Are all the rooms like this?” I asked in awe before walking over to a comfy chair near the fireplace.
“Being a paragon has its perks. But Thibault took great care to design the shifter dorms in accordance to particular animals’ needs. You don’t want to see the cat hallway. Balls of yarn everywhere.”
I chuckled at that. “But you have four animals,” I said thoughtfully, a hint of prying in my tone. I desperately wanted to know what kind of animals he had prowling under his skin.
“Mm-hmm.”
Nope. He wasn’t giving me anything.
My hand trailed over the back of the chair before I meandered over to the table, my eyes locking onto the book there that was titled Mate Bonds: How They’re Formed & How They’re Terminated.
Seeing what I was looking at, Gritt quickly walked over and slammed his hand down on the cover, but it was too late. “Light reading, huh?” I asked. I tried to sound flippant, like it didn’t bother me that he was reading a book about how you could terminate a mate bond. I’m not sure I pulled it off though, because Gritt just coughed and looked away.
“I can’t deny that my pull to you is...alarming,” he replied as he walked over to a pile of clothes and picked them up. He hurriedly tossed them into a hamper before straightening the bright blue comforter on his bed. He was...tidying up. I tried not to smile at the small form of courtesy he was showing me.
“Alarming? What did the book say?” I asked.
Gritt walked over to the large window and stared outside. I watched his back as he clenched and unclenched his fists at his side. “The book said that with a mate bond, there’s a pull. Like you want to be near them all the time. That’s the first step,” he explained, his voice low.
I walked over to him and positioned myself at his side. Another purr escaped his throat when our arms brushed, and he quickly increased the space between us once he realized what was happening.
“Then what?”
“Then...if the bond was settling, I’d be able to sense when my mate is in danger. Or hurting. Basically any intense emotions, I’d be able to feel it.”
I hummed. “Interesting.” I wondered if he felt when Render kissed me or when Hyde put on his little undead show and my desire had ratcheted up. “And then what?”
“Last, I’d get a mate mark on my skin. I’d know that my animals made their choice, and that super would be it for me,” he said. “It normally only happens between shifters, but my brother mated with a vamp. They kept it secret for a while to avoid prejudice between our breeds, but I guess the cat’s out of the bag now.”
At that revelation, we both went silent. His brother was a majority of the reason he hated me, but I couldn’t help the blooming of hope that sprung out of my chest. Maybe Gritt would be...okay with mating with the Void.
Part of me felt bad for him. We were virtual strangers, and the bond, though powerful and usually perfect, was a life sentence. Add the layer of my Void and his future with the council, and we were a recipe for disaster. Not to mention, I still felt drawn to Hyde, Render, and even Quade. Even if Gritt refused to accept the bond, would he be okay exploring other options? I wasn’t ignorant enough to hope for a future with men that didn’t want me, but I hoped one day to settle down with someone that could look past the Void and see me—the real me.
“So...how do you stop it? I’m assuming that’s why you’re reading that book. To find out how,” I finally said after a long, awkward silence. At my words, Gritt clutched his chest like the idea physically hurt him.
“Distance. Time. Sheer will power. I’ve read three research papers and that book
from cover to cover. There’s only one instance of a shifter that successfully broke a mate bond, and it nearly killed him.”
My heart sank. I didn’t know how to feel about all of this, nor was I mentally capable of it right now. “I should go,” I whispered before turning away from the window to grab my duffle bag. Bonds were revered across supernatural factions, but I didn’t want it like this. I didn’t want to make this even harder on him than it already was. He clearly wanted distance so that the bond could break. I should let him have it.
“No,” Gritt said quickly. “Please stay.” He coughed to hide the pleading in his voice, but I caught it. “I uh...I’m on duty tonight,” he added lamely. “We can’t have you stealing anyone’s powers.” His excuse lacked the usual bite he reserved for me, and I turned to face him, surprised.
“You sure? Because I can go. I can find Hyde or maybe Render…”
“No,” he said in a rush. “Stay.”
I regarded his tense face for a moment before nodding. “Okay, Gritt. You can keep an eye on me,” I replied. His entire expression relaxed, and he let out a relieved breath.
I walked over to the attached bathroom so that I could get ready for bed, hiding a smile between my teeth. Once I shut the door, I smiled at myself in the mirror before shaking it off again. Gritt wanted me to stay. I’d seen the truth of that in his green eyes. What that meant exactly, I wasn’t sure, but it was something.
Staring at the mirror, I took in the brown-eyed girl in front of me. She looked tired. Bright. Dim. Alive. Everything and nothing. I tried to see if, behind the Void, there was something worthy of a paragon’s bond. Maybe. Maybe. Maybe.
I quickly changed into my oversized sweats before brushing my teeth and hair. I was just finishing when Gritt yelled from the other side of the door. “You coming or what?”
I twisted the door handle and jumped when I saw him standing right on the other side, nostrils flaring and eyes hooded with heat.
“I’m going to shower now,” he said before walking past me. Our bodies brushed against one another, and I practically melted at the hard feel of his muscles pushed against mine. I quickly passed him before I did something ridiculous, like swoon on the spot or press my hands against his chest. “A fucking cold shower,” he added once he thought I was out of ear shot.
Another smile escaped me as he shut the door behind him. When the water turned on in the bathroom, I took advantage of the brief privacy and looked around his room, looking for clues to explain who Gritt was. I stopped at his nightstand and frowned at the framed photo there. I picked it up and took a good look at the two men poised in the photo. It was of Gritt and his brother, I was sure of it. They looked similar; both wore broad smiles, both had that alpha look in their eyes. Gritt had his arm slung over his brother’s shoulder, and I could tell they were close.
Despite everything, I felt guilty for what happened at the council center. Tearing a shifter away from his animal was an awful thing to do, and I hated knowing that I hurt someone close to Gritt. I was still looking at the photo when the bathroom door opened again a few minutes later. I quickly put the photo back down before spinning around to stare at Gritt. He was clutching a white towel around his waist as rivulets of water trailed down his tan six pack. I involuntarily licked my lips.
“Put your tongue back in your mouth, Void,” he said with a satisfied smile before walking over to his dresser and dropping his towel. My mouth fell open as he spun around and gifted me with a generous view of his impressive ass.
Infuriatingly sexy shifter.
I was salivating for him as I watched him put on his tight boxer briefs before heading back over to where I was standing. “I thought I told you not to touch my stuff,” he said before brushing past me to adjust the picture frame on his desk a millimeter from where I’d set it. His skin was cool where it touched mine, proving that he did, in fact, take a cold shower.
I wasn’t sure what came over me, but the words spilled out before I could stop them. “I promise to return your brother’s powers back to him.”
Gritt’s face went completely still, and I bit my tongue so hard that blood filled my mouth. I had no right to be making promises I wasn’t sure I could keep. I didn’t understand the Void, didn’t understand what it was capable of or if it was even possible, but I wanted to try. I had to try.
“Let’s go to bed, Void,” Gritt said, emotion coating his voice.
I spotted a couch in the corner and started to make my way over to it, but Gritt grabbed my wrist and pulled me down to his California King sized mattress.
“Not a word,” he whispered into my ear before guiding me down to the pillow and tucking me beneath his feather soft comforter. Shifting to the other side of the bed, he turned his back to me.
“Goodnight, Gritt,” I whispered back, not sure if this meant we had a truce or not.
“Not a word, Void,” he reminded me.
I smiled into the pillow.
Chapter 14
I half expected this class to have a cool name like Defense Against the Dark Arts, or Mystical Training for the Magical.
But no. The defense class’s name was just as mundane as it was for humans: P.E.
Although, I had a feeling that Thibault’s idea of physical education was different than the humans’.
“You’re in the vamp’s P.E. class, isn’t that funny?” Gritt asked while circling me, his feet crossing over themselves as he directed me toward the gymnasiums. I’d woken up extra early so I could slink out of his room for my walk of shame back to the school. Except I wasn’t ashamed one bit. Not even a tickle of shame passed off my skin as I walked out of his dorm room that morning with him in tow.
All night, we’d slept in the same bed, an invisible line separating us. I found myself rolling over a bunch of times last night, dying to touch him just once. Dying to close the distance. I was constantly craving him, burning hot with desire, and there was no way to put it out.
“Why is that funny?” I asked him, watching the weightless way he moved—fluid, like hovering smoke. Like the Void, almost.
“Because you both drain things dry,” he laughed before coming to a dead stop, making me run into his toned back just outside a set of wooden double doors at the opposite end of the cafeteria. “Watch yourself in there,” he added before spinning around and leaning down. His nose brushed against mine, making both of us smile, him because he seemed genuinely amused by the contact, and me because I wasn’t sure what to make of this playful side of him. He’d woken up like this—all peppy and shit. It was freaking me out.
“Why are you in such a good mood?” I demanded, running a fingertip over the tingly spot on my nose where we’d touched.
“I’m not,” he answered quickly.
A smile broke out over my face. “Yeah, you are. You’re totally happy.”
“Psh,” he scoffed, straightening up and trying to play it off. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. I’m grumpy like always.”
“Mm-hmm,” I said, unconvinced despite how hard he was trying to force a scowl.
“I am!” he insisted.
I shrugged. “I think it’s nice to see this side of you. Whatever caused it, I like it.”
Gritt’s fake scowl dropped, and his green eyes ran over my face. We stood still in the silence for a second, just studying each other with half smiles on our faces. It wasn’t just him. Despite the fact that I was about to be forced to train with vampires, I’d woken up beside Gritt this morning and had the advantage of seeing his sleepy face, his bed head, and his relaxed, gorgeous body sprawled out over the blankets. He’d looked so good and so peaceful that I hadn’t been able to stop myself from reaching over and brushing a lock of his wild blond hair off his face and letting my fingers graze lightly over his scruff.
Just for a moment, while he was still asleep, I thought about pressing my lips to his. I’d wanted to so badly. But before I could muster the courage, his hot, huge hand had reached out and clamped over my waist. He
’d tugged me into his body, our warmth pressing against each other. I’d gone rigid at the contact, wondering if he was about to wake up and shove me away, but he hadn’t. We’d stayed like that for another ten minutes until I’d finally slipped out of bed. Maybe it was a bit pathetic, but I’d basked in the contact. I’d even snuggled in closer to his side. Maybe that was what had put us in such good moods. A girl could hope.
Gritt shrugged, shoving his hands into the pockets of his uniform slacks. I couldn’t help but notice the bulge at the front of his pants that he was sporting this morning. “Need to chop some wood later?” I quipped.
He winced. “Don’t say chop when you’re talking about my dick.”
I laughed, but Gritt just shook his head at me and adjusted the front of his pants. “Anyway, Render should be in this class to watch you. I’ll just stay till he gets here, then I have my own class to get to.”
I tried hard not to let the disappointment cross over my face at hearing that he was leaving.
“This class is probably gonna suck.”
I laughed again. “Is that a vampire joke? And for the record, all of my classes so far have sucked,” I pointed out.
“Yeah, but it seems like the vamps hate you even more. I think it’s because you’re like a mirror.”
My eyes squinted in confusion. “What do you mean?”
“You’re both takers,” he replied with a casual shrug like it was the most obvious thing in the world.
I blew out a breath. “Right,” I replied.
Maybe sensing my nervousness, Gritt suddenly reached down and laced his fingers through mine. I gasped at the contact, my eyes shooting up to look at him. He smirked down at me, noticing the blush of heat on my cheeks, and then turned and yanked open the door and strolled inside the gymnasium, tugging me behind him like a reluctant pet. I had every intention of keeping my gaze down, but I couldn’t help but observe the room full of strong vamps staring at us with gaping mouths and angry eyes.
Gritt stopped short and turned to me, cursing under his breath. “Oh, shit! I gotta go check up on my bobcat shifter.” He looked around but obviously didn’t see the vampire he was looking for. “Render should be here soon. I’ll come back to make sure he showed up,” he said quietly before leaning down and pressing his lips against my temple.