It's on Us

by Matthew Burkey-Gilchrist

  “Um, yeah. That’s what everyone is telling me.”

  “You should probably listen to them.”

  Cole led me through the french doors that led out onto the deck. I glanced to my left and saw Rory and Tab deep in conversation with Giovanni and Scarlett. Tab said something that sent the intoxicated girl into a fit of giggles and caused Rory to roll his eyes. Giovanni did not look impressed either.

  “So, what made you want to hang out tonight?” I asked.

  “Because I wanted to ask you something,” Cole said. “And because I really do think that you are one cool guy.”

  We walked over to stand next to the railing. On the large stone patio below us, there was a fire going in a large stone fire pit. The bonfire smell was thick in the air and I inhaled deeply, breathing in the scent. There were a few more kids clustered around the bonfire.

  “And what’s that?”

  “I wanted to know if I could post the link to your videos on my stuff. I mean, my twitter and instagram feeds aren’t huge, but some people do follow me.”

  “You want to?”

  Cole nodded. “Yeah, and if you’re cool with it, Giovanni wants to add it to his stream.”

  “His stream?” I asked.

  “Yeah, he’s a huge gamer. Dude actually makes a decent amount of money off his subs.”

  “Wow,” I said. I was slightly taken aback by what Cole was saying. “I mean, yeah, I guess you can if you want. You might get some shit for it, though. I mean, Giovanni might, too. You’ve seen the comments that people were leaving. Some of them were supportive, but there were a lot of assholes, too.”

  “We can handle ourselves,” Cole said. “I’m thinking about asking Giovanni and Scarlett to join us next week, if that’s cool with you.”

  “Of course it’s cool with me,” I said. “The more the merrier, right? I mean, that’s the whole point.”

  We stood there in silence for a few moments.

  “So, what kind of guy makes Henry go all weak in the knees?” Cole asked with a devilish smile on his face.

  Fuck, the dimples were back!

  I blushed what I was sure was a deep shade of red, which only made Cole smile wider.

  “Oh, come on,” Cole said nudging me with his shoulder. “You’re sixteen. I’m pretty sure you know what turns you on.”

  “Do you know?” I asked.

  “You mean, aside from a stiff breeze?”

  I laughed and nearly spit my punch out all over him.

  “What?” Cole asked. He tilted his head to the side, making him look sort of like a confused puppy. “You can’t tell me that you don’t know what makes you motor run.”

  I could feel myself turning redder. “Um, I mean, not really. Honestly, I haven’t ever really let myself think too much about… that.”

  “Sex, Henry. It’s called sex.”

  Again, I felt my cheeks burn. “Yeah, that.”

  “So?”

  “What is it with you straight guys and wanting to know about what gets me hard?” I asked with a raised eyebrow.

  I thought that kind of question might actually make Cole blush, though I suspected that it wouldn’t work on either Rory or Tab. However, Cole only grinned. It was one of the cutest grins that I had ever seen, even better than Danny’s. And it was then that I realized I was falling for another straight guy. I was going to be that guy apparently.

  “Maybe we’re just curious,” Cole said with a shrug. “And maybe some of us are secure enough in what gets us hard to talk about it.”

  I shook my head. “Maybe I’m not really sure what does it.”

  “That’s fair enough.”

  We stood in silence for a moment, just enjoying the night air and the sound of the crackling fire. Something about Cole was so relaxing, like being around him instantly dropped my anxiety level down to almost zero. It was like being around Rory and Tab, except for the fact that I really wanted to make out with Cole. Hell, I wanted to do more than make out with him, I wanted to see him naked.

  Cole leaned in and whispered in my ear. “Wanna see something really geeky?”

  His breath against my ear made me weak in the knees and sent a bolt of electricity right to my dick and to the surprise of no one, I was really regretting wearing the tightest possible jeans I owned.

  “Um, yeah… I mean, sure,” I finally managed to get out.

  “Come on,” Cole said, turning to go back inside.

  I hesitated a moment.

  “Don’t worry, it’s not a sex dunegon or anything… unless you’re into that.”

  “Um…”

  “Kidding, man. Come on.”

  We went back inside, past the cutthroat Mario Kart, and then headed back through the kitchen to the basement. Cole opened the door and flipped on the light switch before bowing deeply and gesturing down the stairs.

  “After you.”

  “Are you sure there isn’t a sex dunegon down here?” I asked as I slowly started to descend. “Because you’re being awfully weird about it.”

  Cole said nothing and followed me down the stairs. When I reached the bottom, I was pretty sure that my jaw became unhinged enough to swallow the entirety of Texas and possibly all of Mexico. Laid out before me and covering pretty much the whole of the expansive basement had to be the largest collection of Star Wars memorabilia that I had ever seen.

  “Holy shit,” I muttered. I looked over at Cole, who was smiling from ear to ear. “You’ve been holding out on me, haven’t you?”

  “You always knew I was a fan,” Cole replied as he walked into the basement.

  “Yeah, but I never knew that you were this level of a fan,” I said.

  “Come on in and have a look around,” Cole said.

  The whole basement was full of shelf after shelf of Star Wars models, figures, and all sorts of things. There was a whole row of lightsabers hanging vertically on the wall at the far end of the room. A large TV was underneath the row of lightsabers with two chairs, looking very much like the chairs from the Falcon’s cockpit, directly across from it. A couch that looked oddly like the couch seen in the Falcon’s lounge was situated in between then. There was even a chess board in the corner of the room that looked like it had been pulled directly from the famous YT-1300 as well.

  “Wow. This must have cost a fortune,” I said looking around.

  “Not as much as you think when you built a lot of it yourself,” Cole said. “My grandpa’s a carpenter and electrician. He helped me design and build a lot of this stuff.”

  But what was most impressive was the large Star Destroyer that was in the middle of the room. It was massive, measuring at least six feet in length, complete with winking lights and engines that looked like they were pushing it right through Cole’s basement. Suspended by barely visible strings scattered around the ship were TIE Fighters, X-Wings, and several rebel ships. It was one of the coolest things that I had ever seen.

  “And that is fucking sweet,” I said, pointing to the Star Destroyer. “How the hell did you build that?”

  “With a lot of sweat, swearing, and work,” Cole said. “I’m actually working on a Super Star Destroyer to replace it.”

  I arched an eyebrow. “Aren’t you an overachiever?”

  Cole shrugged. “I do what I can.”

  I laughed, my face warming a little. Cole gave me a grin.

  “We should probably go back upstairs before people assume we’re making out or something.”

  “There are worse people they’ve assumed I was making out with,” Cole said. “But yeah, maybe you could come over sometime and check out the rest of my collection. I’ve got some stuff in the workshop in the garage, too. I’d love to show you.”

  “Sure, that’d be awesome.”

  “Come on, let’s go make sure that Scarlett hasn’t violated all of your friends' personal space.”

  “I don’t care what you say, I still say she meant to do that,” Tab snapped as we pulled into Rory’s driveway.

  “And
I say that she was drunk and reaching for her glass,” Rory said as he put the car into park. “She was not trying to grab your junk on purpose.”

  Tab frowned. “My junk is amazing.”

  I moaned from the backseat, happy that I had missed the entire incident while I had been inside talking to Cole. Apparently, Scarlett had grabbed Tab’s crotch while reaching for her drink. Tab, naturally, assumed that she was doing it on purpose, Rory and Giovanni had assumed it was an accident. Scarlett could only giggle madly and go dancing off, leaving the three of them to wonder.

  “Can we please stop discussing Tab’s junk?” I said as we got out of the car. “Again.”

  “We never discussed my junk before,” Tab said.

  “And I was perfectly happy with that being the norm.”

  We had stayed at Cole’s for a few hours, talking, hanging out, and getting to know more of his friends. They all seemed pretty cool, although not as cool as Cole. Every time that he looked at me, I sort of melted a little inside. Danny was hot, with his pecs, abs, ass, and, well, if I was honest with myself, also what he had between his legs.

  But Cole, well, Cole was different. He wasn’t as muscular as Danny, but he was still lean and defined. His smile was infectious and seemed to light up the whole room. The longer that we talked and hung out, the more I started to realize that there were growing feelings for Cole that weren’t exactly friendly. They were more than friendly.

  Which figured, considering I apparently was going to be the gay guy that falls in love with only straight guys. I groaned inwardly and tried to keep my feelings to myself, as hopeless as it might be. I knew it wouldn’t be long before Rory and Tab managed to tease out this secret as well.

  We made our way inside Rory’s house and upstairs to his room. We passed his parents’ bedroom, where we heard snoring behind the door. I shook my head. I wasn’t sure how Rory slept all the time with that kind of racket. Once we were in his room, he closed the door before turning on his desk light. We already had two air mattresses set up.

  “What do you think, Henry?” Tab asked as he pulled off his shirt. He shucked his pants seconds later, leaving him standing there in his boxer-briefs. “Do you think this is worth grabbing?”

  Tab made a point to reach down and grab the front of his boxer-briefs in what I can only assume was supposed to be some seductive sort of way. However, as I have previously stated, neither one of my friends did anything to turn me on in that regard.

  “I think I’m trying really hard not to laugh,” I said.

  “Oh, fuck off,” Tab muttered before he turned around and started rummaging through his backpack. He pulled out a pair of sweats moments later. “She was going for it and you’re just jealous that she wanted mine and not yours.”

  “Yeah, that’s right,” Rory said, rolling his eyes. “I’m totally jealous.”

  “See! He admits it!”

  “I was being sarcastic,” Rory replied, taking off his shirt as well.

  We finished changing and for a brief moment, I thought that we were going to get some sleep without another insane conversation about Tab’s junk. Rory and I had settled back in his bed, leaning against the headboard while Tab lounged across the foot of it.

  “Henry, can I ask you something?” Tab asked as he sat up.

  I looked over at Tab. “I swear if this is another question about which one of you I’d do, I will punch in the damn face.”

  “Nothing like that,” Tab said, holding his hands up in defense. “But I think we both know who you would pick. Look, I was just wondering, I mean, once you figure out you’re gay, do you automatically know who… you know.”

  “Know what?” I asked in confusion.

  “You know,” Tab said.

  “You are not making any sense,” I replied.

  “Oh, I think I know what he’s getting at,” Rory said as a smile crept across his face.

  I hated it when he smiled like that.

  “Umm, okay.”

  “He wants to know if you know if you’re a pitcher or a catcher. You know, top or bottom.”

  “I know what he means!” I snapped. I could feel my face instantly turn red. “And… um, well, I guess I don’t really know.”

  “What do you mean, you don’t know?” Tab asked. He narrowed his eyes and leaned in closer to me. “Or you do know and you’re just too afraid to say anything to us?”

  I gulped. If I was being honest with myself, I had thought about that. I was a gay teenager and as much as I would hate to admit it, I did spend a considerable amount of time thinking about sex. And yes, there might have been some thoughts about which one of those I would prefer, but I had no evidence to support those thoughts.

  “You’re being an ass again,” Rory warned him.

  “I’m being curious,” Tab corrected. “Besides, just because a dude enjoys, you know, that area, doesn’t always make him gay.”

  “That’s it,” I said holding my hands up in the air. “We are done talking about this.”

  “I think someone is getting a little uncomfortable,” Rory teased.

  “Of course I’m uncomfortable,” I said. “We’re talking about sex and about what Tab likes to do to himself.”

  “All teenage guys talk about sex,” Rory pointed out. “And eventually, you’re going to start having sex, which means that we need to be comfortable with talking about it.”

  “Or we could, you know, just not talk about it,” I suggested.

  “Nah,” they both said at once.

  “That didn’t sound rehearsed or anything,” I muttered.

  “You’re just lucky that we’re so open minded.”

  “I’m actually probably really lucky for a lot of other reasons, too,” I said. “But we are not going into those reasons now.”

  “What we are going to do,” Tab said as he slid off the bed. “Is going to post that video before you chicken out.”

  “I’m not going to chicken out.”

  “Good,” Tab said. He pulled his tablet out of his backpack. “So, you ready to do this?”

  I took a deep breath. “Yeah, I think I am.”

  “There’s no turning back,” Rory warned me. “You do this, you put that video out there, you can’t undo it.”

  “Don’t want to,” I said, shaking my head. “Do it.”

  Tab handed me his tablet so that I could type in my various passwords. Once that was done, I handed it back to Tab, who took a deep breath. His fingers danced across the screen. After a few moments, he set the table down.

  “Alright, it's out there. And now, so are you.”

  CHAPTER 14

  “Whatever you are, be a good one.” ~ Abraham Lincoln

  There was something in the air weird when I woke up in the morning. It didn’t feel as off as it had when we found out that Noah had killed himself, but it did feel… different. I rubbed the sleep out of eyes and looked over at Rory, who was snoring away in bed. I yawned and stretched before throwing the covers off and standing up. I picked my way around Tab’s body, which was sprawled out on the floor and made my way to the bathroom.

  By the time that I made it back, both Rory and Tab were awake.

  “Did you check your Facebook or anything yet?” Tab asked.

  “I hadn’t checked yet.”

  “Well,” Tab said as he gestured at my pants. “Go on and check it out.”

  “Did you look?” Rory asked.

  “No way,” Tab replied. “I was going to let Henry look first.”

  I took a deep breath and grabbed my phone off Rory’s desk. The screen lit up and for the briefest of moments, I didn’t dare look at it. However, when I looked down, there wasn’t a single message. No texts. No emails. No communication of any kind. I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion. Surely someone had something to say about the video.

  “What’s wrong?” Rory asked. He got out of bed and was at my side, nearly grabbing my phone from my hand. “Did someone say something awful? Do I need to go kneecap an asshole?”
>
  “We are not kneecapping anyone,” Tab said as he got to his feet. “Besides, blackmail and social mockery is so much more damaging.”

  “No one said anything,” I replied.

  Rory grabbed my phone and clicked through my various social platforms.

  “Huh, he’s right. I mean, it’s not like people aren’t viewing it. You have lots and lots of hits. No one is saying anything, though. Which is weird, right?”

  “Maybe people suddenly got enlightened overnight?” Tab suggested. “Or we somehow got sucked into a time warp and are really about twenty years in the future.”

  “I don’t think either of those things happened,” I said. I put my phone down and took a deep breath. “But I’m surprised that no one has said anything.”

  “We all know they will eventually,” Rory said. “But, you’re right. This is weird.”

  We spent the next few minutes scrolling through everything, looking for any sort of comment, but kept coming up empty. The video had gained a lot of hits overnight, and although there were comments, they were all good. None of them had anything negative to say. In fact, most were praising my athletic ability.

  “I’m so confused,” Rory said as his brows furrowed in concentration. “I mean, clearly people watched it, but no one from school has said anything?”

  “Maybe their afraid that we’ll kick their ass if they do,” Tab said.

  There was an outside chance that Tab was right. But, experience told me that most of these people wouldn’t fear that kind of thing, especially not in high school where you could get thrown out for physically fighting someone. I nervously checked all my feeds again, yet there still didn’t seem to be any comments.

  “It’ll be fine,” Rory assured me. “Trust me, things are not going to turn out as bad as you think they are.”

  “And how do you know that?”

  “Call it faith,” said Rory. “Come on, I’m starving. Let’s go grab something to eat.”

  I followed Rory downstairs and into the kitchen, though I still couldn’t shake the feeling that something was wrong. Again, not as wrong as when Noah killed himself, but there was something off in the air. We ate in silence mostly, with the occasional comment about how good Rory’s scrambled eggs were. After breakfast, Tab headed home and I went upstairs to shower.